Drowning in Your Love
By: Stefani
Rated: PG
Disclaimer: Don't Own
Distribution: Please ask
Spoilers: 9/29 (Raw) and 10/1 (SmackDown)
Story Banner: http://www.angelfire.com/wrestling2/wwfjeffandmatt/drowning_in_your_love.JPG

Amy sat on her hotel bed, her head was buried was in her hands, soft tears trickling down her rosy cheeks. Her eyes were swollen from crying for the past few hours; her cheeks stained with mascara that had dripped down her face so long ago. She was still dressed in her clothes from the match earlier. She had sped out of the arena, not able to even look at Matt, and drove straight to her room. She couldn't look at him.

She'd been riding on a cloud… flying high… and now it was all over. The past months, the kisses and intimate hugs… it'd been more then she could want. Though they'd been friends for so long… years and years, she always wanted more. But never got it. On the road, they were as close as close could be… They shared hotel rooms, drove together. They sand Pearl Jam loudly on the radio. It was almost as if she had been kidding herself the whole time. She had convinced herself they were together.

And she knew what was coming. All good things must come to an end after all. It's hard to believe that just a few weeks ago they were kissing on TV. And then it started.

She had fooled herself again. She thought the little Stacy promo was just to promote the lingerie match. It was just a humorous little skit. Ha ha, Matt Hardy was checking out Keibler. No big deal, right? Wrong… again.

When he walked in on Trish changing, it was just another coincidence! They were just… hell, she didn't even know. Amy hit herself again, she knew it was coming. How could she be so blind to the obvious? Be so blind to the inevitable? What was due to happen?

They walked into the arena Monday, laughing… joking about. Matt was hugging her even! And she fit so perfectly into his arms, like two pieces of a puzzle. They were the perfect couple! Who would have guessed Matt and Amy… oh that's right. It was never Matt and Amy, it was Matt Hardy and Lita.

Lita… that damn bitch. It may be Amy's character… but Amy would have never gotten upset at Matt after that elbow. Amy would have clung to him. Matt wouldn't have acted like that. Matt would have chased her down and gotten ice, and Matt would have held her as the bruise appeared, and kissed it, apologizing and whispering soft words. Lita yelled at him… they fought. And Amy distinctly remembered yelling, "It's over, Matt!" She was so mad at herself for saying that.

Amy started crying again, not even wanting to think about the SmackDown they had just preformed. How could they set her up with Jeff of all people? She couldn't bare that she would be the splitting factor between Matt and Jeff. They were the closet brothers she had ever seen. Matt and Jeff made themselves… and she would break them.

No! Lita would break them. She couldn't turn against herself. That would be the end of it all. She could feel Jeff's hand on her cheek… it was nice and soft, and he had the deepest eyes, but Amy could never see herself with Jeff. Vince wouldn't dare go there any ways! He would never set her between the two… then again, it was the same man that he split great tag teams for decades…

And Jeff just had to step overboard and carry her around after she fell as well… why did he do that? That was scripted, and Amy wasn't about to push the new developments any more then they were making them. She sniffled, and pulled her hands away from where they had been resting, over her nose. They were soaked from her leaky sinuses and teardrops.

She finally got the guts to look at the clock on the bedside table. It was already one. She had been sitting here and crying for almost three hours… she couldn't believe it. How had this exploded? How did it get out of hand and her damn heart take over? She promised herself never to fall in love with her friends. Especially Matt… the one she knew she loved.

After she'd made her way up the ramp after the match, she had left Matt in the dust… it probably didn't help much with the way her character was acting. She'd gone straight to her bag and got her keys and left. They were actually the keys to the rental her and Matt had used… but Jeff would give Matt a drive. She was a little thankful for the first time in months her and Matt weren't sharing rooms. That would be a disaster.

He'd always been so loving to her, so kind, so nice. When she got dumped by her ex boyfriend, Matt had came over with chick-flicks and popcorn and they did facials all night, and they slept in the living room. Amy had fallen asleep on his chest; his warm flesh against hers had almost sent her crazy. That was two years ago though. And she hadn't dated since.

"Oh God." She whispered, afraid, scared, embarrassed, and upset. She felt like she had been dumped again, though this time they weren't even going out. And this time Matt wouldn't console her. And this time it would be on national television in front of thousands of fans.

Her tears were salty, and she had a mouthful of them. She had ran out of tissues forty minutes ago, the hotel waste basket was a haven of snot filled Kleenex. She reached back and hugged the pillow, for the first time aware of her reflection bouncing back at her from the mirror across from the bed. And the sight of her face only upset her more, and she let out a loud cry, before she heard a faint knock.

"My imagination of course." She thought, her head aching from all of the crying she had been doing.

"Ames? You in there." Her eyes widened with fear. It was him, she'd know that voice any wear. He couldn't see her like this… and it would take much more then a few minutes to calm down. She tried to stay quiet, knowing her had to hear her soft whimpers and sniffles, she was fully conscience of every sound she made.

"Ames, it's just me, Matt…" He repeated, the knocking stopped and only replaced by his loving voice that was usually soothing to her. She slowly stood up, her knees felt like they were made of jelly, shaking about and trembling, and she almost fell a few times. Her arms were trembling back and forth, her fiery red hair was ragged and sticking out from her hands that had been tugging at it earlier.

She closed her eyes tightly, thinking she had to be imagining everything, and she couldn't open that door. If she opened the door, it would be chaos. All hell would break loose and erupt through everything.

"Ames? The receptionist said you can up here… what's the matter? You sped out of there so fast… I had to wait for Jeff to finish primping and all before we could even get here… are you there? Are you in the shower?" Why am I talking out loud? Matt asked himself, his hand lingering on the door. "She must have gone out or is in the bath." Matt thought as he started to walk away, a little down, and very worried about her.

Amy hadn't moved since she had stood up. Her legs felt like there were hundred-pound weights on them holding them down, not allowing her to move. It was if her legs could predict what would happen if she opened that door, and they knew to stop her. By the time she finally reached the door, no one was there. Part of her was happy she hadn't had to face him, half wanted to break down and cry again because she had lost her big chance.

Her phone rang. She panicked. Was it him? Was it an emergency? Thoughts her mother in a car wreck or a hospital bed filled her mind, and she dove for it on the fourth ring.

"Hello?" Her voice was cracked and upset.

"Amy? What's the matter? I stopped by earlier and you didn't answer. I thought maybe you had left… or were in the bath or something." Matt said with his normal tender voice.

"Um… yea sorry." She said, wanting to come up with some excuse, but nothing coming to mind.

"Well… can I come over? We can hang out for a little while… I got a pizza." Her stomach flipped. She would have at least fifteen minutes to get herself together… she could run cold water over her face… "Is that a yes?" He asked again, breaking her concentration.

"Um… sure." She said gently.

"Great, be there in a few." Amy hung up, staring at the phone for a few minutes, trying to clear her thoughts, but instead of going away they kept coming back, kept piling up, kept taking over her every thought, ever notion.

The door knocked again. Why was he here already? She had anticipated fifteen minutes. She looked at her clock. No way? She had stared at that phone for fifteen minutes? What was happening to her? She stood up, and walked to the door, trying to wipe at her eyes and opened it.

Matt was there in a loose T-shirt with a pair of jeans on, and a medium pizza box in his hands, concern written all over his face. He rushed in and set the box down, taking her in his arms and rocking her face against his chest.

"What's wrong?" He asked softly, her face against his chest. Her tears were stronger now as he held her. He rubbed her back for a moment before backing to her bed and pulling her down and against her. Matt studied her face all over, trying to figure out what could have possibly happened, his paranoia possessing him.

"Amy… you have to tell me what's the matter so I can go and fix it." He said gently, his voice making her whimper and tears trickle on his shirt. He pulled back and tilter her chin up, burying his eyes into hers, his hand rubbing her cheek. The room was silent except for her cries and sniffles. Matt reached back and pulled a handkerchief from his back pocket, putting it under her nose, where she blew loudly. He wiped at her eyes, getting a little of the makeup off before he set the wet cloth on the bed and tended to her.

"Matt." She whispered as he had set her away for a moment to turn his attention somewhere else. He immediately shot his head back around to hers. She was his only weakness. He locked their eyes together, trying to read her face.

"What's the matter?" He asked again as she plunged onto him. He sighed and rubbed her back, the netted top rubbing against his fingers. He held her closer, kissing her forehead lightly, the touch of his lips shaking her up more. He as confused, and worried about what was wrong; her left arm clung across his chest and gripped his muscular shoulder tightly.

Amy started to calm herself down, knowing she was in for it now. She eventually stopped crying, and Matt's head was right by her head, she could feel his every breath on her.

"How about you go take a nice hot shower, and put on some warm clothes? Hmm?" He asked her; Amy stood up, her legs clamed a bit. She nodded and ran off to the bathroom, leaving Matt dumbfounded.

The heat of the shower was perfect against her heated flesh. She wished she could stay in it's warmth forever and never have to face the world, just stay in the tiled hotel bathroom and be happy with her thoughts, her memories.

She knew she couldn't be in there too long, Matt would be worried and come, so she climbed out, her hair sticking to her back. She flung her neck forward, and a mass of red flew forward, spraying water on the wall. She used a large white towel to hold it all up on top of her head as she put on her loose pajama pants and loose light blue cotton T-shirt. She opened the door, steam running into the room. Matt was on the bed, on his stomach, watching the TV ahead of him.

He turned when the door opened, patting the spot beside him. Amy threw her towel in on the floor and walked to him, laying against his body, his arm draping over her.

"If you don't want to talk you don't have to." He said, taking his eyes away from the screen.

"I'll tell you… later." She said, "For now I just want you to hold me." He smiled at her and sat up, getting her with him, and yanking her up to the base of the bed. She let out a small giggled as he put her in his arms. His eyes burned into her, Amy closed her eyes, wanting to go back to how she had been, imagining they were together, imagining they were a couple… he was her boyfriend holding her… snuggling, worried.

After forty minutes, Matt assumed she had gone to sleep against him, and scooted down more with her. The pillow was still wet with tears. He snuck them under the top cover with her against him, wishing he could just make everything better. He hated to see Amy in pain, or upset, it broke his heart. She was so nice and beautiful; she should never get hurt like this. Amy stirred against him.

"Shh, I'll stay with you tonight." He whispered, the TV softly playing. She smiled and opened her eyes. He looked at her, "Go on to sleep." Amy shook her head. Matt looked at her again, confused.

"Matt…" It's now or never Ames… they're going to break the team up… do it while you're still a little together…

"What Amy?" He asked, pulling her hair from her eyes.

"I… I have…" He watched her struggle, feeling his heart open a little as she went on, "I think… I mean, I know… I… I love you." She said it so softly, Matt didn't quite catch it, and it took a minute to process. During that minute Amy was freaking out, thinking he was mad at her, her was going to reject her.

His dark eyes glared into hers and his free hand held her soft cheek again. And Matt kissed her. They had kissed a lot of times, but this was different. This was a real kiss. Their lips were against each others softly touching one another's, his hand implanted on her face as they locked lips. Amy was shaking, scared to do anything. It was the first time they had kissed off camera. It was their first real kiss. It was the first time AMY kissed Matt, and not Lita.

"Why didn't you tell me earlier?" Matt said gently as he pulled back.

"I was scared…" She babbled. Matt's eyes beamed and they kissed again.

"I love you too." He replied, "I was scared too." He smiled, and his breathtaking grin forced her to smile too, and Matt pulled Amy closer to his body.

"It was so nice to finally kiss you." She said, Matt looking at her confused.

"We've kissed lots of times…"

"You kissed Lita lots of times… you finally kissed me." He chuckled and kissed her again lightly, their lips setting against each other.

"I like Amy a lot more." He whispered with their mouths pressed together.

"Me too." She said, tears of happiness welling up, "I like Amy better too…"