WWF Goes to Springer

By: Stefani

Rated: Ehhhh.. I'm gonna go on PG13

Disclaimer: Don't own.

Distribution: Just ask,

Jerry: Welcome back ladies and gentlemen to today's show, "Baby, I don't love you any more." I'm here with Jeff. Now Jeff says he's got a confession to make to someone. Tell us, Jeff, who is this?

Jeff: It would be my four-year boyfriend, Chris.

Jerry: And what is it about?

Jeff: I'm in love with another man.

*Crowd boos*

Jerry: Alright, alright, so Jeff, how long as this other relationship been going on?

Jeff: Um. 3 and half years

*Crowd boos again*

Jerry: Alright, well, let's bring out Chris!

*Chris comes out and walks over to Jeff and hugs him as they share a kiss*

Jerry: Well Chris, hello and welcome to the show. You're here because Jeff wants to tell you something.

*Jeff takes his hand*

Jeff: Chris, you know I love you, but I've been with another man

*Chris is furious and demands to know who it is*

Jeff: It's Matt.

Chris: You're brother!!

*HUGE crowd cheer*

Jerry: Well, let's bring out Matt!

*Matt comes out and hugs Jeff as Chris gets a steel chair*

Chris: I'm gonna kill him!

*Security guards restrain him as Matt and Jeff share a kiss and sit down*

Jerry: Well. this is unique.

*Chris is still fending off security guards with the chair*

Jeff: Matt, I love you

Matt: I love you too

Jerry: Well. guys, there's someone else here. let's bring out Adam!

*Adam comes out and crowd cheers*

Adam: Whoa, whoa. I think there's part of this story that's missing.

Jerry: What's that?

Adam: I'm married to Chris!

*Crowd screams loudly as Jeff stares at Chris as him and Adam now kiss*

Jeff: What the hell? You bunch of *beep beep* Chris how could you *beep* not tell you me sorry little piece of *beep*

*Matt struggles to hold him back and everything get's sorted out and they all sit down*

Jerry: So let me get this straight? Jeff and Chris have been going out, but the whole time Adam and Chris have been married and Jeff's been cheating on Chris with his brother?

*Crowd boo*

Adam: Not true! We just got married last night

*Smug kiss*

Jeff: *is furious* You know what? Huh?

*He gets down on his hands and knees to Matt*

Jeff: Will you marry me?

Matt: Of course!

*Massive chaos and fighting erupts on stage*

Jeff: Damn right you son of a *beep*ing son of a mother *beep*er!!

Jerry: Well, while they duce it out, let me bring out my next guest. Rob!

*RVD comes out to a huge crowd cheer*

Jerry: Well Rob, you're hear because there's someone you want to say something to.

Rob: Yes, I would like to tell a Mrs. Stephanie Helmsly something.

Jerry: Without further adu.

*Stephanie comes out in her cheap ECW hat a slutty leather outfit, smiling and pointing at RVD*

Rob: STOP IT!

Stephanie: Stop what, *thump thingy* RVD??

Rob: THAT! I hate you! Cheap whore! Where's your husband!

Stephanie: Husband? What are you talking abou- ohhh HIM?

Rob: YES!

Jerry: Husband? Oh you mean Mr. Helmsly..

*HHH enters storming over to Rob who puts his hands up, HHH turning to Stephanie, furious*

Stephanie: Oh God Hunter. what are you doing here..

Hunter: RVD? You would want that puke over me?

Rob: HEY! Who are you calling a puke!

*RVD and HHH get into it, Stephanie stuck in the middle trying to separate it, while Jeff and Chris continue yelling at each other and Adam and Matt sitting dumbfounded*

Jerry: Well once again absoulte chaos has broken out and-

Chris: Don't you EVVVVVVER say that again!

Jeff: You don't have to acting like your fu*beep*ing stupid character on EVERY TV show

Matt: Jeff Hardy, calm down!

Edge: OH that was brutal! B-R-Utal!

Jeff: I'm going to loose it, not you too Matty?

Matt: I love Lita!

Jeff: NOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!

*Jeff runs off the set screaming while the other continue acting in- character. When out of no where Rhyno gores Chris through part of the set and the crowd goes wild. Hayman pops up screaming "Gore! Gore! Gore!" and Adam and Matt exchange glances*

Adam: I guess it's just you and me now..

Matt: now exactly.

*They both look over at the cat fight between RVD and HHH, Stephanie lying on the floor some few yards away*

Adam: Close enough

*Then they start to kiss*

Jerry: Well if you just joined us, Jeff dumped Chris to go out with his brother Matt, but turns out the night before Chris had married Adam, the man he'd been cheating on Jeff with all along. So Jeff proposed to Matt. Jeff ran off the stage while chaos erupted and Chris got taken down by some ridiculous beast-man that came out of no where. RVD came out to tell Stephanie something, but her husband came out and once again. all chaos broke.

As if that wasn't enough excitement for you all..let's bring out our final guest for this show.Jay!

*Jay walks out with some totally stupid sunglasses and a shirt with more feathers on it then a twenty-foot chicken*

Jay: Hello Jerry! I'm here to say that. well first, all of you people in here STINK, don't you make them practice good hygiene? Especially if they're going to be in the presence of ME! I mean, come on! Any ways, I have to tell my boyfriend of 6 months something.

Jerry: And who is that?

Jay: Oh just the sexiest bitch around! Booker T!

*Booker comes out doing the spineroni a few times before siting down beside Jay*

Jerry: Okay Booker, your boyfriend has something to tell you.

Booker: What is it? Sucka!

Jay: I wish you wouldn't do that in public..

Booker: Do what sucka?

Jay: That stupid sucka thing! It's embarrassing!

Booker: Tell me, he did not just say that.

Jerry: He did.

Jay: STUPID, that's right, I DID say that!

*Booker gets furious and a word fight starts between them*

Jay: LISTEN! I'm pregnant!

*dead silence on the stage, Matt and Adam stop making out, Chris raises his head from the ground, Hunter and RVD stop fighting and look over and Jeff peeks around the curtain. Booker's eyes pop out of his head.*

Booker: Tell me-

Jay: I DID say it! I'm pregnant! There! I said it! I AM CARRYING YOUR BABY

Booker: A little Book?

Jay: I don't think so, he is going to have a COOL name. *snorts* little Book.

Booker: I'm going to be a dada? *thud*

Jerry: Well, when 3 guests are knocked out we officially have to go, so I'm gonna call it a day! Thanks for being with us. Come back tomorrow for "My husband is a sex maniac" thank you! And good bye!

*camera fades*