What if…The Cullens came trick-or-treating

What if…The Cullens came trick-or-treating?

"Hey Alice, hurry up!" Catherine called from the hot tub. Alice, Catherine, Allison, Stef, Natalie and Emma had all been out trick or treating, and now they were all in Allison's hot tub, talking about Twilight, wubbulation, and boys. Alice sprinted from the house suddenly, across the cold wet leaves, and almost dived into the hot tub.

"Geez Alice!" Stef said as she walked out after her. Emma wrung out her now completely soaked hair as she approached, and casually said, "I dare you to ding-dong-ditch the Ayers."

"Oh, I should! The totally deserve it." She said, glancing at the Ayers house. Everyone looked at each other.

"Do it!" Catherine cheered. "I wanna hear him cussing." Allison raised an eyebrow at her.

Stef grinned impishly, and disappeared. A minute later, she was sprinting back, shivering. (Everyone is in a bikini)

"Nice!" Allison whispered slapping her a high five as they laughed.

"Hey, let's get them again…but with this." Emma held up a plastic bag as she got out.

"What…is that exactly?" Alice said, leaning closer for a better look.

"Umm, let's just say its Jingles leavings." Emma said. Alice leaned away.

(Jingles is Allison's totally shazamin' basset hound.)

"What are you going to do with it?" Catherine asked.

"I'm gonna put it on the doormat of course. When Mike steps outside, he will step right in it." Stef nodded appreciatively.

"Let's go!" Emma whispered, and she and Stef ran away.


Emma crept with Stef towards the house. Big bushes grew up about halfway across the windows. Like a cat, Stef crept up the stairs to the front door.

Emma followed, and turned the bag silently upside down on the doormat. Stef started giggling.

"Go!" she whispered, trying to keep the laughs in. Emma vaulted over the railing as Stef rang the bell. Stef vaulted over too, and they ran for it.

The door opened…


"What the fuck? Oh my god!" Mike yelled clearly into the night. Emma and Stef arrived breathless to their laughing friends.

Natalie slid under water to keep from laughing out loud.

Slapping Emma and Stef high-fives as the came in, Alice's back shook with silent laughter.

"Damn it!" Mike yelled.

Catherine buried her face in her hands, giggling.

"If you ring this bell one more time, I will call the police! God!" Mike yelled.

"I think Mike blew a gasket." Allison whispered.

Catherine laughed out loud. Natalie joined her as she resurfaced.

"I'm gonna kill you if I find you!!" Mike screamed, before slamming his door.

After their laughter died down, Natalie grinned.

"Should I get him again?" She asked.

"If you can handle the death threat." Alice replied.

"But it was so funny Alice!" Catherine threw in.

"Yeah, but not the last part. I didn't think that Mike was that insane." Stef said.

"What planet do you live on? Mike belongs in a mental institution." Emma asked.

Allison's doorbell rang.

"Well that would be Mike." Natalie joked.

Everyone looked at each other.

"It's your house Allison." Catherine said.

"But Emma and Stef ding-dong-ditched him!" Allison argued.

"Fine! We should all go." Alice said.

"But it's cold!" Catherine whined.

"Come on!" Emma hissed as she climbed out.

The six of them crept into Allison's house, and to the front door. Catherine reached for the handle.

"Wait! We need clothes dingus!" Natalie hissed. But it was too late.

The Cullens, who had been walking away, turned around.

"Holy mother fu-" Emma started to whisper.

"Ummm…" Alice said.

Allison fainted.

"Trick or treat, smell my feet, give me something good to eat, if you don't I don't care, cause I can see…" Emmett started to sing, before Jasper elbowed him.

Jasper was dressed as a Scream, with his mask in hand. Alice was on his arm, dressed as a witch. On the other side of them, Edward was a pimp, and Bella was his hoe. (Provocative, huh?)

And in back, Carlisle and Esme were dressed as clowns. But in front…

Rosalie was on Emmett's arm, dressed as a fairy princess.

Emmett was dressed as a vampire.

Happy Halloween!