Disclaimer: Queer as Folk belongs, in its entirety, to Showtime and Cowlip.

Author's Note: This is my first story ever. Reviews, critiques etc. would be most welcome and encouraging. Special thanks to Spontaneity who is Beta reading this for me and is really improving the story.

This story is intended to feel like the show. Each chapter is a scene and none are written from a single POV. I'll keep going until I run out of plot bunnies or you stop reading/reviewing.

Feel free to write your own stories around it - especially POVs. I'd love to look at the scenes from a different point of view. I've already written one POV from an original character. All I ask is that you start the title with QAF NY so I can spot them and don't go ahead in time from where I am because I have plans. Other than that, have fun.


Chapter 1 – Brian Arrives in New York

He was changing.

It surprised the hell out of him.

As the limousine wound through the narrow streets of New York, Brian wondered if Justin would like the new him. A year ago, it wouldn't even have occurred to him to worry about that, certainly not to be nervous about it. But – he was changing.

After two months, he had finally lined up some possible New York contracts for Kinnetics. The changes had started earlier, though, on the day of the bombing. Brian's eyes closed with the intensity of the memory. He had fallen apart. When he couldn't find Justin, he had simply fallen apart. His talent for seeing through the lies people told themselves, for cutting through the bullshit, had been applied to himself that day. Denial became impossible. He loved Justin Taylor. And with that realization, he had started to change.

Brian thought back to other, similar events in his life. The day he realized he could care about someone else – and went to Michael Novotny's rescue. The day he realized he didn't care who knew he was gay – and joined his coach in the shower. The day he realized that people cause their own pain – and cut his parents out of his life. The day he realized he loved Justin Taylor – and went overboard. Totally.

Christ! Commitment, country home, cuddling and most surprising of all, monogamy.

Brian winced at the memory. Justin had been right. Nobody changes that much, that fast. And yet - he was changing. You couldn't look at yourself that clearly and not change. That's why he avoided looking most of the time. He liked his life. Too much self-analysis just fucked things up. On the other hand, denying he loved Justin had almost fucked it up more.

Since Justin had left two months ago, Brian had been working out how Brian Kinney acted if he's in love. After the engagement, Justin hadn't wanted the man Brian tried to be. Justin knew him well enough to see through any Stepford fag crap, giving up pieces of himself just to make Justin happy. That's not love, that's sacrifice. Brian smiled at the memory.

Some of the choices were easy. He wanted to spend more time with Justin. He didn't care about being the hottest stud on Liberty Avenue anymore. He wanted to shift his business to New York. Running Kinnetics had gotten too easy. Although he'd never admit it out loud, he wanted to cuddle. He could say "I love you".

Other choices were harder. Did he still want to sleep around? Given the last two months, Brian knew the answer was 'a lot less than he used to', but saying 'never again' felt like sacrifice. He and Justin would have to figure out some new rules.

Did he want to live at the country house he'd bought? Definitely not. Brian loved the city – the noise, the people. The thought of hearing cows in the distance made him want to puke. What if he stepped in something? He'd already put the house up for sale.

After two months working away at the problem, Brian was starting to figure out who he was, but would Justin want the new him? As the limousine pulled up in front of a large, red brick townhouse Brian knew it was worth a few nerves.