Disclaimer: The characters of Ranma ½ belong to Rumiko Takahashi, and not me. I am writing this story for fun and won't be making a penny off of it.
Some Things are Just too Ridiculous By Lioconvoy
Story One: Akane's Curse
Akane finished her morning jog and quickly changed from her running clothes into her training dogi. Then she set up some bricks to smash. Raising her fist she prepared to destroy all three, but….
"There you are Akane; father wants us to meet in the living room." Nabiki wasn't at all surprised to find her sister behind the dojo. Even after their father stopped teaching them, Akane still practiced what little she learned before the death of their mother. "Honestly Akane, you're never going to get a boyfriend."
The youngest Tendo let her fist come crashing down and accomplished her goal. "I really don't care. Not everyone thinks the world revolves around boys."
"Of course not, the world revolves around you doesn't it." The middle daughter walked back toward the house. Thanks to Kuno, or her sister; no one really knew who's fault it was, Furinkan was now an all girls' school. There were no boys to be interested in. Not that she paid too much attention to them, but she wasn't able to make as much money with them gone.
"That wasn't my fault! Kuno was the one who made the stupid announcement!" Akane followed her older sister, annoyed at her comment. She knew full well the world didn't revolve around her, but most the boys of their school were perverts anyway and deserved what they got, the others just were just at the wrong place at the wrong time.
As her younger sisters sat down at the dining room table Kasumi passed out lemonade, it was a very hot day. After putting a glass in front of her father she sat next to Nabiki, on the side opposite him.
"Now that you're all here I have some wonderful news." Soun smiled as tears of joy fell from his eyes. He had waited so very long for this day to arrive. "A very good friend of mine, Genma Saotome, is on his way here with his son, Ranma. If one of you three were to marry him, and carry on the dojo then the Tendo family Legacy would be secure."
"Now wait a minute! Shouldn't we have some say in who we'll marry!"
"If you want your friend's son to remain male it really should be me or Kasumi." Nabiki wasn't surprised by Akane's outburst at all, and normally she'd agree, but the Saotome family could be rich. "Is he cute?"
"They've just completed a long training journey which recently took them to China." He had to change the subject, Genma told him that he had a son, but that was all the Tendo patriarch knew about Ranma.
"Father, that's not answering Nabiki's question. I also want to know more about the man we're supposed to marry. How old is he?" Younger men bored her, some older men bored her as well, but the oldest Tendo sister was sure she'd rather be with an older man rather than a younger one.
"Genma has been training Ranma since the day he could walk."
"WHAT IS HE LIKE!"
Akane watched as her father started laughing after Kasumi's and Nabiki's joint proclamation. He had never met Ranma himself, had he? Their father was engaging them to a boy who he knew almost nothing about. How could he?
"Let go you old fool!"
The youngest Tendo sister turned to the sound coming from the home's entrance. Was it Mr. Saotome and his son? Nabiki and her father got up and rushed to the door, but she and Kasumi took their time after getting up from the table. Before getting to the door, both her father and sister ran back to join them. Then she noticed that they were followed by a panda carrying someone.
"You're scaring them spitless"
Kasumi wondered about the person over the panda's shoulder, they were right, the bear was scaring them. "Father, is this your friend?"
The short haired sister watched their father shake his head as to say no. Why was a panda just visiting them? The bear then put its captive down in front of their father. "You're not …"
"I'm Ranma Saotome, sorry about this." Ranma played with her pigtail. There was going to have to be a long explanation for what just happened. This was all her old man's fault, with their curses this was no time for engagements.
Ranma followed behind the younger Tendo sisters to their family Dojo. After introducing herself, Mr. Tendo gave her a big hug and discovered she wasn't a he. Learning that, the mustached man fainted and the middle sister spent the next five minutes poking or grabbing her chest and complaining she wasn't a guy. Finally the youngest sister stopped Nabiki and suggested they go to the dojo to spar.
"I'm sorry about Nabiki; she did the same thing to Kuno." She wasn't there, but she was told by one of her sister's classmates that Nabiki spent the better part of a day poking Kuno after he was transformed.
"Speaking of Kuno…. Ranma, you haven't met Akane before and she beat you up?" Maybe their fiancé was supposed to be a boy, but her little sister had beaten him up during one of her rampages.
"NABIKI! I don't go beating up random people!" The first day after Kuno's proclamation, she found herself fighting half the male students at Furinkan. The next day the other half of the male population came out to talk to her about what happened to the first group, she didn't know they just wanted to talk, and afterwards Furinkan was an all girls' school.
Whatever the two sisters were talking about was beyond the pigtailed girl's understanding. She sort of wondered what Akane possibly beating her up before would have to do with anything, but she didn't think the youngest Tendo would possibly give her a challenge. She doubted she'd even break a sweat.
As they reached the door to the dojo a thought came across the middle Tendo daughter's mind. Ranma had been training her whole life and probably thought that Akane wouldn't give her a decent fight. She was probably right, but she didn't want to overestimate the redhead or underestimate her little sister. "Akane, can you go ahead? I'd like to talk to Ranma alone for a moment."
"Okay." She didn't know what Nabiki was up to, but Akane complied and went inside the dojo leaving Ranma with her sister.
The panda sat outside by the Koi pond chewing on bamboo that Soun's oldest had given him. Genma was rather curious why the young woman even kept cut bamboo in her pantry. Given his old friend's reaction he had not been expecting a panda to come to visit.
He had tried to put a tea kettle on the stove for hot water, but Kasumi stopped him. The young woman then admonished him saying 'tea was not for pandas' and then gave him the bamboo and sent him outside.
He needed to explain his situation to his old friend, but as long as he was in his cursed form he had no way of communicating with the Tendo patriarch. How was he supposed to get hot water? Maybe he could sneak into the house and see if the bath was filled.
Standing opposite Akane, Ranma thought about her sister's request. Nabiki wanted her not only to not hold back on the younger Tendo, but to also use equal force on her opponent. She wanted her to judge how hard Akane was hitting and reply with that same strength. The middle Tendo sister claim the youngest one needed to be taught a lesson, was she really the right person to give this lesson though?
"This is just for fun. Don't worry I won't hurt you." Akane got in her starting stance and Ranma just stood there. Since she made the challenge maybe the redhead was expecting her to throw the first punch. Running at her guest she then did just that and Ranma leapt over her fist. Then following through with a kick the pigtailed girl spread her legs into a split and avoided the kick as well. Her opponent then retaliated with a punch and a kick of her own. Both blows got through her own defenses, and they really hurt.
Nabiki smiled, Akane looked like she was in pain. 'Don't worry I won't hurt you'. The younger girl didn't know her own strength and wasn't holding back enough. Her little sister's ego needed to be taken down a notch or two and it seemed like Ranma was the one to do it. How long would the fight last though? Akane threw a few more punches and Ranma dodged then returned them, but her sister wasn't giving up. It was the same close minded stubbornness that was responsible for what happened at school.
~ A month after the school year started. ~
Nabiki couldn't think of any reason for the whole school to be summoned to the auditorium. There weren't any school events, or a sports championship to talk about. On the stage several of the underclassmen were setting up a podium and a backdrop with the Kyokujitsu-ki on it. Seeing the backdrop she started to get a bad feeling which a second later was confirmed by Kuno stepping on the stage. Her classmate was the self proclaimed rising young star of the Furinkan kendo club. Although she thought he was cute with his short black hair, his brown eyes, and his well defined body; his ego was a big turn off. What was Kuno doing?"
"Fellow students, it has come to my attention that a number of you have taken interest in the fierce tigress that is Akane Tendo. If you wish to take out Akane Tendo then you must defeat her in combat. For only a man is truly worthy of her and if one cannot best her then he is no man. Hear me, for I shall accept no other terms, prove yourself a man or do not bother the pure and tidy Akane Tendo."
The middle Tendo looked around to see where her sister was in the auditorium. She could only imagine the kind of looks Akane was getting after that speech.
~ Early the next day ~
Normally she would walk with her sister to school, but today she had left before Akane because she wanted to get a good vantage point of what she thought might happen. Kuno wasn't the only idiot in Furinkan, and she expected a lot of other guys to try and ambush her sister before the school day started.
As she entered the school yard she was proven right, half the male student body was waiting for her sister. Some were in their school uniforms, others in the garb of their clubs. If this went on everyday things could get quite interesting, and possibly profitable. Her class room was on the third floor and close to the center of the school building; it would be the best place to watch the fight from.
~ A half an hour later ~
Nabiki didn't believe what she was seeing. She knew her sister was a monster, so Akane over coming all the boys was a given, but…. Every time her little sister beat a boy there was a puff of smoke and instead of a boy being on the ground there was a girl, clothing and all. Many of the boys despite how they were dressed ended up in various seifukus; a few others were now dressed in various colored buruma and white t-shirts.
Finally her sister made her way to Kuno, the youngest Tendo seemed unaware of what happened to the boys she had already defeated. As the sword boy went to strike Akane, she leapt into the air and kicked him in the face. Just as with the others there was a puff of smoke, and the figure that crashed into the ground was no longer a kendo garbed male, but a miko clad female. What in the world had just happened?
~The next morning~
The middle Tendo sister sat in her class room going over her books. With half the male population gone her profits would go down, way down since it was the perverted half that Akane made female. Well not all of the perverts had been in Kuno's group yesterday, but those that were her regular customers were. The rest got their picture of Akane from Hikaru Gosunkugi for free.
The only good thing to come out of the mass change in student gender was that the Vice Principal had decided to change the school uniform from the drab blue jumper to a cuter sailor fuku that had appeared on some of the transformed boys. Once the students were given the new uniforms she could probably make up some of the lost profits by selling pictures to the all boys' school in the area.
Breaking her train of thought, she could hear something was going on outside. What was happening today? None of the other boys would be stupid enough to fight Akane would they, they weren't gathered when she came to school today. Getting up from her desk she went to the window where one of her classmates was already standing. "Sumiko, what's happening?"
"The rest of the boys went out to talk to your sister, and she's beating them up!"
"What?" Her sister wasn't about to make Furinkan an all girls' school was she. There was no way she'd make up for the lost profits.
"Chojiro-sempai gathered the remaining boys to talk to Akane about what happened yesterday. Instead of talking your sister is just beating them up."
Of course with her sister's one track mind… Akane thought they were there to fight her and she just had to throw the first punch.
~ The Tendo Dojo now ~
Fed up after not landing a single blow on Ranma, Akane gathered the remainder of her strength and ran at the redhead. Her fist went through the wall but the pigtailed girl had gotten out of the way in time. Ranma poked Akane in the back then when her sister turned around she punched her hard in the stomach sending her into the wall that she had just placed the hole in. Akane slumped to the ground and didn't look very good. "Akane!"
"I did what you asked me to, but I didn't enjoy it." Ranma leaned down over Akane and was not in the least bit happy with what she had done. She was always taught you don't hurt girls, but that was exactly what she did.
"It's her own fault she got too serious. I know what I asked you to do but…?"
"I still held back a little, but I think I hurt her pretty badly. If she accepted defeat sooner she wouldn't be as hurt." Determination was a good thing in a serious fight, but they were just sparring, why did Akane have to push herself so hard? Why didn't she just acknowledge the fact that she was the weaker one. "Can you help put Akane on my back? I'll carry her inside the house."
"Okay." She had told Ranma what she did because she wanted the redhead to win the fight. There were two reason, one her sister needed to learn there were people stronger than her. Maybe if Akane understood that she might not be so quick to solve her problems with her fist. Sure Kuno's group deserved what happen to them, but other half of the male population didn't. Second, she also was a little curious to see if a girl beat Akane, would they become a guy? It seemed Akane's curse only worked one way, or it was possible that beating Akane might only transform those that had become girls by her curse. Finding out what she did wasn't as satisfying as she thought it would be, hopefully Akane would at least learn the lesson she wanted her to.
After several failed attempts at getting inside the Tendo home, Genma was finally on his way to the bath. Hopefully there was some hot water in the tub so that he could change back into the man his old friend would recognize.
Once again he was curious about Soun's oldest, somehow every time he tried to enter the house she was there. He tried going through the front door, she was there sweeping in front of it. He tried squeezing through a window upstairs; she was cleaning the room it was in. Since she was upstairs he tried enter through the patio door she originally shooed him out of; somehow she was serving her father tea.
Now though; Ranma had done something to distract everyone in the house and he was only a few feet from the bathroom. As stealthly as he could without resorting to the Umisenken he traveled the remaining distance and put his paw on the door. He was about to open it….
"Mr. Panda, the bath is not for bears."
Kasumi had stepped out of the bathroom in a towel with a very stern look on her face. Things were just not going his way.
Ranma blinked as she looked out the window; Kasumi was shooing the panda out of the house. Turning around the oldest Tendo daughter was still looking over Akane. Was there more than one Kasumi?
"Will she make it!"
"Father, Akane isn't that bad. Ranma just knocked the wind out of her. I think she also wore herself out during her spar with Ranma. All she needs is rest and she'll be fine." Her youngest sister would have some bruises in the morning, but she wasn't that bad off. Kasumi sighed, it was too bad 'she' answered the phone; this was the perfect excuse to get Dr. Tofu to come to their home.
"I'm sorry about this." Even though she did hold back, the pigtail girl knew that Akane's condition was her fault. There were reasons boys didn't fight girls.
"It's my fault Ranma, I told you not to hold back." Nabiki wanted Akane to be taught a lesson; she didn't want her sister in this condition.
"No Nabiki, the blame for this falls upon the person who doesn't discipline Akane when she needs it."
"K…Kasumi, how could you talk to your own father that way?"
"Father I can talk to you that way because you don't discipline me. Honestly father, if it was someone else who beat up Akane she could be much worse off than she is now." She was the oldest daughter and not her father's wife, so it really wasn't her place to tell her father these things but sometimes... If their mother was still here things wouldn't be this way.
Genma ate his breakfast of bamboo while three of the Tendos and Ranma ate a normal breakfast. Why hadn't his ingrate son changed him back yet? Kasumi made him spend the night outside and despite the heat of the day it had been a very cold night.
After the boy finished eating he went over to Kasumi and then went into the kitchen. Was it possible the boy was finally going to reveal their curses to the Tendos? It was far past time. A minute later Ranma exited the kitchen with a tray and seemed to be heading upstairs. WHY WASN'T THE BOY CHANGING HIM BACK!
Ranma entered Akane's room and put the tray down by her bed. She still hadn't wakened up, but in the kitchen Kasumi reassured her that her sister would be fine. "I'm really sorry about this."
"Well I'm just glad you're a girl."
"You're awake!" The redhead didn't have the slightest clue what the youngest Tendo meant but she was glad Akane was finally awake.
"I hurt all over, but you're really good." She had never lost before. Not that she had been in too many fights, but every other one she had been ever in she was the victor. Akane didn't feel good about losing, but she was glad it was Ranma who beat her. The way the pigtailed girl beat her; there was no denying she was stronger than her.
"Not really. I don't want to be mean or anything but you're not that good; you're way too slow and your defense is non-existent. It's also pretty obvious you didn't finish your training because you don't seem to know anything past the basics. Not to mention that we were supposed to be sparring, you said you wouldn't hurt me, but you put way too much strength in your punches." Sure these days she won three out of five bouts with her old man, but she wouldn't consider herself good till she won five out of five.
"My father stopped training me after my mother died. I never really learned anything but the basics. Kasumi and Nabiki learned some of the advance techniques for our school, but Kasumi was too busy keeping everything together, and Nabiki was just too lazy to teach me what she learned." Although she wouldn't argue with the redhead, she didn't agree with her that she was a bad martial artist. She did have to agree that maybe she did go too far for a sparring match. Thinking about the strength she used…. "You used whatever force I did!"
"Not exactly, I held back a little, Nabiki had asked me not to though. But yeah, see how hurt you are, don't you think I'd be as bad if any of your blows connected?" Truth be told she probably wouldn't be as bad, she taken stronger punches from her father, but not everyone had her endurance.
Thinking about everything Ranma was saying, maybe the pigtailed girl had a point. She wasn't that strong. Physically maybe; but there was more to true strength than that and she knew it. For the first time she was starting to think all her victories were shallow, not just the ones she had against the males who hadn't fought back. The redhead hadn't changed though, that was a good thing. "Well I'm glad you're still a girl."
"Why wouldn't I be?"
"I have a curse. One of the upperclassman at my school gave it to me. When I beat up a guy they turn into a girl. I was sort of afraid I'd awake to find I turned you into a guy." A guy Ranma might not be that bad, she or one of her sisters was supposed Ranma's fiancée after all.
"Yeah." The middle sister was always asking her why she considered it a curse. Nabiki and everyone else at school assume she didn't like boys and that she'd consider her ability granted by Kuno a blessing rather than a curse that wasn't the case.
Soun sighed and put down the morning newspaper while Kasumi cleaned the table. "What am I going to do about this?"
"Do about what father?" It was possible her father was talking about the situation with Ranma, but she didn't want to assume. There was really nothing that could be done about the redhead, her father was an only child and her mother's family members were not Tendo's.
"Ranma. Genma said he had a son, but Ranma is a girl. I understand Akane doesn't like boys, but I cannot approve of my daughter marrying another girl." How were their families supposed to join? It was impossible if they both had daughters. If only Akane's curse had turned Ranma into a boy.
Kasumi shook her head and frowned. Why did everyone think Akane was 'that' way? The youngest Tendo liked boys just fine. The reason Akane grew her hair long was because she wanted to impress Dr. Tofu. Also the after returning from school the day of the first fight her little sister spent time crying about how disappointed she was over the captain of the Judo club. Akane liked Danjuro, but instead of asking her out properly, he had had listened to Kuno and now he was a girl. Maybe if Akane had to go through the morning mob more than just the one time she might actually hate boys, but that wasn't the case.
After listening to Akane's story on how she got her curse; Ranma felt she was ready to tell the youngest Tendo about her own curse. If she had to be engaged to one of the Tendo sisters, Akane seemed like she might understand her. Only time would tell if it would work but she was willing to give it a try.
-This story was inspired by a topic at fukufics(dot)com. Although I do have idea for additional stories in this particular universe, I don't know if I'll get around to writing them so this could very well be a oneshot
-Kyokujitsu-ki: The Kyokujitsu-ki is the Japanese war flag used by Imperial Japanese Navy and Imperial Japanese Army. Like the normal Japanese flag it has a red circle in the center representing the sun, but is also has sixteen rays coming from the red circle going out to the edges of the flag.
-For those that recognize the name Tomobiki High, yes that's the name of the high school from Lum. I was too lazy to try and come up with an original name for the All Boys' School, so I just stole the name from Ataru's school (It was in Nerima as well anyway.)