Need feedback, not sure if I like this chapter.

I opened my eyes and let the harsh sunlight burn them. My head hurt and there was an ache all over my entire body. I rubbed my forehead and looked down to see what the weight was on my chest. Minato.

A threw my head back down in frustration. 'Are we made up now? Ah… who cares.' I looked back at the weight, it was drooling on me.

"Hey… Wake up." I tried to say it as softly as possible but the drool was looking at me. "N-Namikaze wake up…" Maybe he's dead? No, he's warm, and obviously able to use his salivary glands. I scratched my head in annoyance… I. Want. A. SHOWER.

Looking towards the sink I drew out the water with my chakra. I molded it into a large tear drop and let it loose on his drooling face.

"Ow!" I smirked.

"Did that hurt?' I couldn't help but laugh.

"No… I just have a headache."

"Oh boo hoo. Up, up up. I need a shower." I started bounce on the couch still lying down. His head got the message when it finally rose three feet in the are and smacked back down onto my stomach.

"Alright… Alright. Getting up, I'm at least trying to anyway." He was stumbling and it did not look pretty.

"I can help you there."


"I learned a little medical training, especially to kill hangovers." I signaled him to come over to me, which was not an easy feat. I positioned my hands on his arms. I pulled up his shirt sleeves and my arms began to grow green. I focused on the drug in his blood stream and got pits and pieces of it out. I sent the gloop flying to the sink.

"This might seem weird but… bare with me." I put my hands on his chest and did the same. I felt the alcohol I drew come from his skin pores like sweet. The heat from the healing was also making the process easier to draw it since the pores puckered up better. I ran my hands up and down his chest and stomach to try to get as much alcohol from the blood stream as possible… Minato looked in pain. I sent the remains to the sink.

"Does your head still hurt?" He dared to look into my eyes.

"Just a little." He bent down so his head was close to mine. I placed my slender fingers on his head and began to massage. He made a face. "What are you doing?"

"Relax, I'm just doing a chiropractor technique. Relieving stress that can cause even more of a head ache and drawing a little alcohol from your head. "I'm done, now I can shower…YES!" I ran up stairs.

I sat on the couch feeling so much better it should have been illegal. I wonder where she learned all of this, she's gotten so strong.

But my mind kept wandering to how nice of her it was to put herself in an awkward position just so I could feel better. If she's so good to people, why is she bad to herself. I know that's the reason she wears long sleeves now.

I don't want to watch her mutilate herself so she can 'become a new person.' I sat for awhile and a thought came to me. What if she's doing those things to herself inside the bathroom right now.

She locked the door behind her and grabbed her 'happy' bag as the water was running. The bag had painkillers, razors, knives, cigarettes, and small bottles of hallucinating concoctions she made herself.

Kushina conveniently found a syringe and loaded it with one of the jars of God knows what. With her sleeve up she found a razor scar and stuck the syringe in. The feeling was like glue invading her insides, it made her relax and forget the weak Kushina Uzumaki.

Her shaking fingers reached for the razor blade, it accidentally cut her. She sucked the wound dry , then slashed at her arm. It bit hard and shook her arm from the pain, unintentionally spreading blood-droplets all over the bath room. She again made another line, this time keeping her hand still. The blood coated her arm and stung. This is what made her feel alive, and soon the pain would sub-side and she would become invincible.

Invincibility was here now, she felt no pain. Kushina grabbed the razor and slashed deeper into her arm. She was mesmerized as the blood dripping from her arm pooled on the floor. The kunoichi laid down not realizing she was bathing in her own blood.

Twist, turn, burn it's gone.

Think, love, it won't be long.

You'll soon be in a dream, a dream.

Your worries will recede, recede.

Twist, turn, it goes in the air.

Problems baby we have our share.

Mind is fading, time is fading.

No debating, no frustrating.

You'll soon be in a dream, a dream.

Your happiness will succeed, succeed

Your wishes are a guarantee

So sleep, sleep and dream.

Twist turn for so long.

Think of me when I'm gone.

Kushina, sung her of song of woeful nostalgia and became unconscious.

She's been in there for an hour, why does this always happen in the bathroom? "Kushina?" He knocked many times. "Kushina!"

He fiddled with the door but it was locked. He shook his head not believing he was doing this and kicked in the door. He saw a pool of blood on the floor.

"Kushina, what the hell is on the floor!"

"I-It's uhhh…. I had an accident." She replied dully. She was sitting on the shower floor without any clothes.

"Really Kushina, what kind of accident?"

Shit, she thought. She was in trouble. "A…. what is it called? A-a period accident! Kami-sama can't I be a woman without you worrying?"

"What the hell are you talking about?"

"I dunno… " He couldn't really see what was going on in there but he concluded it was probably nothing. His eyes traveled to a little black bag with a red stripe on it.

"Alright Kushina, keep on showering." She didn't respond. However Minato grabbed the bag. He ran up stairs into the attic, knowing Kushina wasn't going to look for him in there if she were to come out.

The little black bag was already unzipped, he took a look inside and dumped out the contents. Some of the items he didn't recognize, but each small vile smelled awful. He pocketed them and safely returned her bag to the bathroom, leaving two of the vials in the bag, so she wouldn't notice.

The shower room still looked like it had no life in it. He looked around nervously. "I'm going to get fresh… air ok?" She grunted in response.

He couldn't let Tsunade see this but he knew someone else that could identify it. Within seconds, thanks to his flying thunder God jutsu, he was teleported in the Yamanaka flower shop.

It was a quaint little shop, but by far the best one in the village. "Inoichi!" After a couple of crashing sounds he came out with soil all over his hands.

"Something the matter, you don't look to well."

He stammered and smacked himself on the head. "No time for chatting, sorry just… please tell me what's in this!" Minato hurriedly handed the container to Inoichi.

He examined it. He looked up at me superiorly and said, "Come on, even you should know what this is. It's main ingredient is a flower which gave me the biggest clue. This poppy-seed mixture could be anything from being a natural oil for your hair or heroin."

"What! Heroin?"

"By the way Minato, where did you get this, it's mixed very well. They obviously knew what they were doing." He started to laugh.

Minato's fist clenched Inoichi's shirt and brought him close. "Listen to me. You are not to tell anyone about this… If you do. It will be your death, understand?" Inoichi farsightedly nodded.

Minato turned away to leave.

Tsunade rubbed her hand on her forehead as she watched the sunset sitting on the dock. "Hime-chan."

She gave her teammate a sharp look."Get your act together. If you want to go to the top, you better start wanting it for the right reasons."

He sat next to her. "What ever do you mean," he feigned innocence.

"You're fake…" They sat in a moment of silence, a very long moment. "I- never mind…. What happened to us?" She looked into his deceptive eyes, it felt like they were worlds apart.

"What us, didn't you make it very clear there wasn't an us?" Her breath hitched a little at his tone.

"Look, at the moment… Dan just died… That was years ago. "

He looked at the beautiful blonde. "Seven years to be exact. They say seven is the most magical number."

He fingered her hair and she relaxed. She closed her eyes. "Sorry my thoughts weren't clear then, but they are now. You're not going to hurt me too? Can you promise?" Her eyes opened and pierced his.

"I'll never hurt you, hime" He kissed her forehead and they gazed out at the sunset.

Twenty feet away a certain spiky-haired hermit's heart was breaking. His eyes were glued to the screen that was Tsunade and Orochimaru.

Jiraiya walked away from the scene. So this is how it felt. Having the one you love not return it to you, even worse she gives her love to your best friend.

He looked at the empty streets, like his heart, I'm a poet God damn it, so empty, no room- Minato! I'm still loved after all, he thought.

Minato saw his teacher and jogged over to him. "Sensei, I need your help."

Jiraiya smiled. "And what can this sexy, single, woman magnet do for you?"

I sat on the counter chewing on her thumb nail. Someone took my favorite one, my favorite vile that is. The kitchen was a mess from me rummaging through it. The only thing I keep thinking about is getting this mysterious thing off my thumb.

The front door flew open and my head shot up. Oh no, I'm in trouble, I can't let him see me like this. I tried to get down but the floor was farther down than I thought and fell. "Ahh…hhh."

I needed a quick pick-me up, I was starting to wear off. "Minato-san… I'm going to sleep on the floor if that's alright. It's not like you actually like me."

He came marching toward me, I pouted. "Ugh! KUSHINA!" He was mad, it was funny. I smiled, I forgot why though. Everything is going fuzzy fuzz. It's like waves are washing over me every time I breathe. The room went black and white and finally stayed black.

Sarutobi, for once sat at his desk mulling over paper work. The only thought that came to mind was who to pick.


"Come in." And she came in. Her long pig-tails shook with her head as she took off her hat.

"I think I'm getting to him." She started tapping her foot angrily. "Look, I feel like a bad guy, I don't want to hurt him anymore than anyone else has. The only reason I'm doing this is so you can pay me and I can leave." She sat in front of her Sensei. "Why does it have to be him?"

"Tsunade, you already agreed, and think of all the good this would do the village, don't be selfish."

"I don't think I'm being selfish, however a promise is a promise."

He sat back in his chair and relaxed a little bit. "Wait Sensei," her face loomed in a shadow, "What about Jiraiya?" She bit her lip.

"What about Jiraiya, it's not like you to worry about people's feelings?"

That was cold, she could handle it though. "Yeah, manipulating is what you trained me best at Sensei."

His face fell and he put down his pipe. "I think it would be best if you leave." And glared at her.

"Can't wait." She left the office in a huff. The stairs outside were steep, slick, and she was not in the right mind to be walking down them in heels.

"Whoah!" She closed her eyes and braced herself for the fall. Anytime now, she opened them and saw a pervy face smiling down at her. She couldn't help but roll her eyes and smirk.

"Thanks." He looked through her.

"You don't have to lie to me. I've heard everything just now." He locked eyes with her. "I'm selfish too. I'm selfish because I'm stealing every glance as possible from you. I'm making the whole deal difficult for you."

Tsunade looked down still in his arms. "I didn't want to lie to you. That was the last thing I wanted to do, but now I have an opportunity to get away."

Jiraiya exhaled slowly and put his forehead against hers. "What if I don't want you to go away?" He whispered. "I want us to stay together forever."

She gasped. "How can I be so sure I'm not going to end up like those other disposable girls you have. I am I going to be another girl on your list, I'm not going to matter am I!"

She glared at him. "Put me down, Now." She squirmed but he held on tight, she tried to punch but she just couldn't. "PLEASE!" She was panting hard and he let her go. Slowly backing away she said, "If I really mattered you wouldn't have let me go, you of all people should know that." Tsunade stomped her feet in frustration. And gave him one last glare before turning away.

"No, because I don't want to make you do something you don't want to do, not like everyone else is doing to you." He walked away and left her standing in her anger.

"I vowed to never love another man, and I don't. So why do I feel this way?" She stomped away to her house.

Tsunade walked into her house door only to find the man who made her so mad. "What are you doing in my house?"

He rose out of his seat and approached her. "I wanted to see you."

She leaned on her door arms crossed. "Like I've never heard that one before."

Jiraiya placed his hands on her shoulders. "I don't care if you believe me, as long as I can hold you like this-" he moved his arms to her waist-"and appriciate you for how strong you are."

She nuzzled her head into his chest. He was warm and comforting, he was her shield that protected her from everything. She had to ask herself why she kept leaving her shield when she needed it so much. Was it because other shields couldn't protect her, was it because she wasn't suppose to have this shield? No, it was because she loved her shield so much she didn't want her shield to suffer with her.

"You're strong but I need a shield, that's you." She looked up.

"Funny, I was thinking the exact same thing." And then they kissed.