Disclaimer: Do Not Own

Summary: Vincent engages in negative self talk, Cid snaps him out of it.


You

You look at yourself in the mirror and feel both an immense sense of gratitude and disgust. You know he deserves better than what you give him. He deserves to have a normal life, with a person that can talk to him about their past without freezing up. He deserves someone who he can be emotionally competent with. He deserves someone who can be open with him, but what does he get?

You.

You, who are so afraid to open yourself up lest these years be a dream from a cruel scientist. You, who is so terrified of being alone that you keep everyone at arms length because hey, they're going to leave you someday. You, who is the constant buzz kill for the pilot. You, who is snarky and doesn't get jokes. You, who despite his clothes is extremely uptight. You who has to stay on a constant watch lest one of your demons decides to come out. Have you ever felt love? Oh right, yes that one time. But look where that ended you up? Doesn't that prove you're unlovable?

You should just admit it,

You're a monster.

You don't deserve him. That ray of sunlight in your life. You've never deserved him, and you never will. Love doesn't exist for monsters.

"OY! Spooky!" Vincent snapped out of what his mind was telling him as he looked at his husband.

"Yes Cidney?" The vampire tentatively asked.

"Stop the fuckin Negative Self-Talk! Don't you realize fuckin yet that if I didn't want you I wouldn't stay the fuck around? Now C'mon! I'm outta cigs and tea! We might as well stop by an see Yuffie while we're at it, Gaia knows I don't need another bitch out about how we never go and see her." Cid huffed as he pulled the demon vessel along. Vincent gave a small smileof gratitude as he allowed himself to be pulled. Maybe he didn't deserve Cid, but he was going to keep the pilot as long as he could.