"How's the 'just friends' thing going with Lily?" Sirius asked James one Saturday night in their dorm. At the beginning of their 7th year, James had decided to accept that Lily wasn't going to go out with him, so started acting decent towards her instead of seizing every opportunity to flirt with her. And for Lily' sake, he made the decision just in time; the next week, they discovered that they were head boy and girl, and the experience, for her, would have been unbearable if it weren't for James' personal pact.
"Fine, so far." James halfway lied.
"That bad?" Sirius asked, knowing his friend way to well to accept 'fine' to be a true answer. James sighed.
"Well, it seems fine…" he started. "To the outside eye." Sirius lifted one eyebrow, silently asking James to continue. "Well no matter how hard I try, I can't get over her." He started, grabbing the attention of the previously unengaged Remus and Peter. "But I'm hiding it, so she doesn't really care. I think she believes I've moved on, which is good, now we can be friends." Sirius opened his mouth to explain to his ignorant friend that what he said in no way qualifies as 'fine' but he never got the chance.
"James!" Lily's voice called from down the staircase. "Common, we have to patrol the hallways!" James looked over at Sirius with a smug smile.
"Gotta go." He said.
"Don't think you've gotten yourself out of this, young man! You're mother and I are still going to talk." Sirius yelled in his best impression of James' father. James heard the last of his words as he bolted down the stairs.
"Let's go." Lily invited with a smile as she opened the portrait hole. James followed Lily out and they walked around the lifeless hallways aimlessly. They had gotten into talking as they patrolled, be it about James' paranoid mother who to this day found it necessary to remind him to wear mittens in the cold, or Lily's sister who insisted on denying the existence of the wizarding world whenever it wasn't absolutely necessary.
It was extremely late by the time they whispered the word sphinx to the animated painting of the fat lady and climbed up into the common room.
"Going to bed?" Lily asked James.
"Actually, I'm not tired." He said as he sat down in the middle of the biggest sofa the abandoned room had to offer. "You?"
"Not tired…" she agreed.
"Want to not be tired over here with me?" he asked her as he patted the cushions on the either side of him, as if presenting lily with her options.
"Sure." She said with a smile as she sat down on his right side and gently leaned her on his shoulder. He shifted uncomfortably to the left, silently cursing her for making getting over her so hard, but she followed. He moved over again and again she scooted next to him, this time leaning her back against his arm. So he loved again, making her fumble a little in her seat. As she regained her balance, she looked over at him innocently confused.
"You okay?" she asked.
"Yeah, fine." He muttered, trying to suppress his feelings for her.
"Hmm." She said curiously as she made to lean on him again, but he stood up quickly and she didn't even notice it until she was lying flat on her back on the sofa. She looked up at James and he quickly looked away and down at the floor. She smiled without him noticing and stood. She stepped over to him and put a hand on his shoulder, making his heart beat faster though she didn't notice. He shook it off and sat back down with his forehead in his hand as if he were trying to get rid of a headache. "Are you sure you're okay?" she asked him. " You seemed perfectly normal a minute ago." She said as she sat next to him.
"I'm fine. I just- just need my space." He concluded. Lily pouted, intentionally trying to make him feel pity for her.
"But you're so comfy." She said as she leaned on him again. He suddenly hated the idea of being a close friend of the girl he loved, knowing that he would probably never find a way to get out of this and still be able to be on close terms with her. He looked down at her. She was peacefully resting her head on his shoulder. There was no discomfort in her pose, no confusion in her eyes, just peace. That was when he knew that as long as they were friends, this was going to keep happening, and he would have to keep suppressing the overwhelming urge to kiss her. And if he could barely hold it back his one time, how could he expect himself to hold it back if this continued.
"I have to go." He said as he stood quickly and headed towards the boy's staircase, leaving Lily once more on her back on the sofa. "I suddenly just felt really tired." He lied hastily before badly faking a yawn and sprinting up the stairs. He snuck in the room where is three friends were already soundly asleep and got in bed, unable to fall asleep for the next two hours as thoughts of Lily shrouded his brain.
The next morning, James was walking through the halls alone. Sirius, Remus and Peter were off setting up some prank and were all genuinely concerned something was wrong when he said he didn't want to help this time. After insisting that e wasn't under the imperious curse, he finally got away and found himself here, wandering aimlessly like he did on his routes with Lily at night, only he was alone and all was silent. He realized he was surprisingly close to the entrance to Ravenclaw tower, which was not at all where he thought he was, when he heard hurried footsteps running down the corridor around the corner. He went to see what was the matter, but the second he got to the bend, the running girl collided with him. He sat up and rubbed the back of his head that had just violently hit the ground, then looked over at the girl.
"Lily?" he asked disbelievingly as he finally took notice to who had hit him. She was sitting over him with an extremely worried look on her face.
"Are you okay?" she blurted out quickly and impatiently.
"Yeah… fine." He said as he stood. Lily sighed with relief.
"I thought I'd hurt you." She admitted.
"Like you could." He joked with a smug smile on his face. Lily rolled her eyes then grabbed his hand in hers.
"I'm glad you're okay." She said. His heartbeat quickened like it had the night before.
"Yeah…" he said as he yanked his hand away as gently as he possibly could. "Right, so… I better be going."
"I'm making you uncomfortable again, aren't I?" she asked as her sad gaze dropped down to the floor.
"Well, um…" he stuttered, trying to not lie to her but also not tell her the truth.
"I get it…" she said glumly. "I'm sorry, I just… I don't even know how to say it."
"Say what?" he asked almost a little too quickly
"Well… I guess, after all these years, I sorta, kinda… like you, and I guess I was just hoping you still like me." she mumbled. "But you obviously don't, so I guess I'll just leave you be then." She said as she turned and tried to stop herself from crying. She wanted nothing more than to just run and never have to see him again, and hopefully make the pain go away, but before she even got the chance to hope for that, he grabbed her by the wrist. She turned to tell him to let her go, but the instant she was facing him again he was kissing her. His arms found their way around her as he deepened the kiss and her arms were soon around his neck. It was several moments before they pulled apart, but they continued to hold each other.
"What was that about me obviously not liking you?" he asked her.
"You obviously don't like me enough to kiss me again." She taunted.
"Oh yeah?" he challenged playfully.
"Prove me wrong."
I said I'd post another one, so here it is, sooner than I expected^_^ (A lot sooner seeing as I realized that i had already edited it...)
So please comment and if you're a Lily/James fan, feel free to read my other million oneshots about them^_^