Disclaimer: I don't own this song or the characters from General Hospital.
A/N: After listening to this song, I couldn't help but notice the similarities between Hubie and Rocko and Jason and Spinelli during the early days of their friendship. And inspiration hit me like a Bruce Lee one-finger punch.
The fireball that was once Lorenzo Alcazar's private yacht sank to the bottom of the harbor. Jason Morgan stood, checking himself for any wounds before turning his attention to the young hacker Sonny had sent him to bring back to Port Charles. He examined Damien Spinelli quickly before walking away in a huff.
"M-m-r. Morgan?" The hacker stuttered, "I thought you n-needed me to come with you to Port Charles."
"Well, you don't have to worry about that anymore." Jason shouted, his frustration clear. "You lost your laptop in the explosion."
Jason began to rub his temples, hoping that the vein in his forehead would stop pounding so hard.
"You clearly underestimated the Jackal." He said, reaching under his oversized hoodie and pulling out his laptop.
Jason's expression began to alternate from rage to shock to elation.
"I can't believe it." He muttered, "How?"
"The Jackal must insist that the Stone Cold One calm down." Spinelli said, opening the laptop, "The Jackal's safe passage may be critically damaged in the swim back to shore."
Spinelli let out a noise that seemed to be a mix of joy and terror all rolled into one.
"Does it still work?" Jason demanded.
"The Jackal is pleased to report that his One True Companion is still functional."
Jason looked up to the Heavens, "Thank you," and then turned his attention to Spinelli, "And you, you are crazy, you're insane..."
Spinelli cringed, waiting for the fatal shot to be fired by the enforcer of Darth Alcazar's archenemy.
In a moment of weakness, Jason laughed, "You're amazing."
"Amazing?" Spinelli asked, opening his eyes, "Me?"
"What?" Jason asked, realizing the floodgate he may have just opened, "I didn't say anything."
Jason started to walk away, Spinelli following close behind,
"Yes, you did." He exclaimed, "I heard you."
"I have a gun, Spinelli." The enforcer stated.
"You do like me."
"And bullets, lots of bullets." Jason finished, trying to walk away from the younger man.
"You really like me."
"I don't like anyone."
"Yes, you do." Spinelli laughed, "And I knew it all along."
Music began to play, seemingly out of nowhere. Jason knew that The Band was there somewhere, those clowns made a habit out of stalking everyone from Port Charles to Pine Valley to any other place in the world.
"Get away from me." Jason ordered, but Spinelli ignored him.
"Mr. Morgan," Spinelli shouted, "Does this mean we've put our differences out to sea?"
Spinelli laughed at his horrible joke as Jason rolled his eyes, knowing the worst was still to come,
"I'd like to put you out to sea." Jason grumbled, slumping down on a dead tree stump,
Spinelli laughed even louder and so did the music, and with that, Spinelli began to sing,
Spinelli: Look how we get along together. I think it's great the way we blend.
He tried to shake Jason's hand, but the enforcer pulled away,
Spinelli: You've tried to be as tough as leather. But now I see that's just pretend.
Spinelli's attempt at a hug was thwarted by Jason rolling away from the stomp
Spinelli: We'll find our way through stormy weather. Just you and me right to the end.
Spinelli chased after Jason, who really didn't want to sing, but he would have if he spent too much time around the music,
Spinelli: Hey buddy, looks like we're two birds of a feather. And, gee, it looks like I got me a friend...Now you go…
"Take it, Jason," Spinelli shouted, happily, "Hey Jason, what you call a flower before it opens?"
Jason looked perplexed, "What?"
"What do you call a flower before it opens?"
Spinelli smiled, "I love it when you call me "bud.""
Spinelli: Look how we get along together.
Jason began to sing along, much to his chagrin,
Jason: You are incredibly annoying
Spinelli: I think it's great the way we blend.
Spinelli became more animated and danced around the shoreline they were on,
Jason: You're like a bone stuck in my throat
Spinelli tried to give a manly love tap, only to have Jason stop him by catching the hacker's head in his much larger hand.
Spinelli: You've tried to be as tough as leather.
Jason: This isn't something I'm enjoying.
Spinelli: But now I see that's just pretend.
Jason let go, letting Spinelli fall to the ground,
Jason: I shoulda left you on that boat
Spinelli: (stood up and jumped on Jason's back) We'll find our way through stormy weather.
Jason: (frustrated) You want a friend? Go find a snail!
Spinelli: Just you and me right to the end.
He finally dropped Spinelli, venting his rage,
Jason: Or better yet, Killer Whale!
Spinelli: Hey buddy, looks like we're two birds of a feather.
Spinelli grabbed Jason's leg and Jason dragged him across the shore,
Jason: Don't call me buddy!
Spinelli: And, gee, it looks like I got me a friend.
Jason: Uh uh! Not me!
Spinelli: Now you try!
Jason looked back at Spinelli, hoping if he was quiet the singing would end,
"Take it, Jason...Jason, I've got you a sandwich, where should I put it?" Spinelli asked, his goofy grin still on his face.
"What?" Jason asked, the almost Sonny-like vein on his forehead reappearing.
"I've got you a sandwich, where should I put it?"
Jason held out his hand, "Put it there."
Spinelli slammed his hand on Jason's, "Put it there! Oh, yeah!"
Jason's yanked his hands free and began to sing back, Spinelli not far behind as far as lyrics go,
Jason: When you're a rebel you're a rebel.
Spinelli: You really like me, just admit it
Jason: You don't go finding friends for life.
Spinelli: Alright, I'm gonna hold my breath
Spinelli took a deep breath,
Jason: Why don't you pack your blasted laptop…
Spinelli: (through his lips, making sure no oxygen exited his body) Quit it, admit it!
Jason: And take yourself a healthy hike!
Spinelli: But you know, you're gonna cause my death!
Jason: They don't have hackers down in Africa.
Spinelli: It's getting dark...
Jason: Why don't you go and start a trend!
Spinelli: G-g-g-goodbye, Stone Cold
Spinelli collapsed to the ground, his face bluer than a berry.
"Hey, knock it off." Jason commanded, "You're turning blue, you bird-brain. Breath."
He didn't get a reaction,
"Say it!!" Spinelli shouted, closing his mouth again.
Jason groaned and sang,
Jason: Alright then! I kinda sorta maybe you know...
Spinelli popped to his feet,
Spinelli: You mean you like me?
Jason: A little.
He put his arm around Jason,
Spinelli: You mean it?
Jason shoved him off,
Jason: Don't push it!
The duo belted out,
Both: Oh, looks like I got me a friend!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
And that, my friends, was the beginning of one of the best friendships in General Hospital history.