Disclaimer: don't own love hina so don't sue me
Update:Not much changed. prof read it properly this time so i think i got all the mistakes in the reviews. I'll probably answer/ comment on a review when I post a new chap.
Sempai, My Saviour
She was dragged into an alley with a hand clamped over her mouth to stop her screaming. He pushed her against the ally wall where she the wind was knocked out of her and she fell to the ground. The man moved closer to his prey, savouring the look of fear in the young girl's eyes, the anticipation of what he was about to do and the thrill he would receive. He reached down, tore off her shirt and bra to admire his victim.
Shinobu Maehara, the very cute but incredibly shy cook of Hinata Sou, tried to fight against the man but it soon became apparent that she was nowhere near strong enough to fight off a kitten let alone a fully grown man. She was smart enough to realize what was going on and what most likely was going to happen to her. This is what her parents and friends had so often warned her about but there was nothing she could do. She was going to raped and most probably killed.
As she felt the hot breath of the pervert on her face Shinobu's mind was reeling. She prayed to any and every God that might be listening to help her, for this to be nothing more than a terrible nightmare and that she would soon wake, but in the end she knew it was futile. This man, this Monster was going to rape her and there was nothing that could happen to prevent this. In an effort to block out what was happening to her she thought about the people that meant the most to her in life. First and foremost in her mind were her parents. She loved both of them dearly and the worst memories she had were of the arguments they had been embroiled in and the divorce that followed. It was her love for her parents that led to her moving into the Hinita as she simply couldn't hurt one of them by deciding to live with one instead of the other. She remembered the day when that saint of a woman Grandma Hina saved her from making that dreadful choice between the two people whom she loved most in the world.
Her mind then wandered to her friends, no her family at Hinata sou. For that is what they had all become to her in the time she's spent with them and the adventures they had gotten entangled in. She thought of all the people that she now considers her family. Kaolla Su, the girl she considers her closet friend, the young Gaijin with boundless energy and an ever cheerful personality which can brighten anyone's day.
Motoko Aoyama the strong and beautiful swords-woman Shinobu had come to respect and admire. She has often wished to be half as strong and beautiful as Motoko so she could look after herself and not rely on the protection of others. Now more than ever did she wish she was like Motoko so she could defend herself.
Then she thought of Mitsune "Kitsune" Konno the woman that was overflowing with confidence. Shinobu was not only jealous of how carefree the sake connoisseur always was but also how well endowed she was. Always in the hot springs Shinobu felt inadequate in comparison to her friends, even Su who was not much older than her, but she felt the saddest when she compares herself to the resident fox.
She felt jealous of every girl at the Hinata but none more so than Naru Narusegawa. Out of all the girls she lives with she is the most envious of Naru. Not only is she smart, she is beautiful, confident and strong. In other words everything Shinobu was not. But more so than anything she was jealous of the fact that the girl holds the keys to the heart of the man she loves. Her thoughts then went to the person she cares the most about. Keitaro Urashima, her sempai. Although the man was clumsy and slightly perverted he had succeeded in winning a place in her heart as the first man she ever loved. Through all his accidents and 'perversions' Shinobu saw the sweet, caring, dedicated man he was. While he was not the smartest person in the world he still took the time to help her with her homework or any other problem she had. He was always there to catch her whenever she was about to fall, always there to protect her even if it meant he was going to get yelled at and beaten by Naru and/or Motoko for 'molesting' her. While Shinobu was always distressed by this he always returned with a smile on his face, just happy that she wasn't hurt. This is what she loved most about him he was always there for her even if he ended up getting hurt.
'Sempai' Shinobu thought to herself.
What would he think when he finds out what happened to her? Would he be angry at her for not being able to look out for herself, would he hate her and be disgusted with her because she had her virginity stolen from her?
'Perhaps it would be better if this monster did kill me instead of letting me live.' She wondered 'at least then I won't have to live with the knowledge that Sempai hates me'.
Then another part of her mind countered 'But Sempai has always looked after me, so surely he couldn't hate me something I had no control over.' Her mind battles back and forth like this for what seems like hours to Shinobu but in reality barely even a second has passed.
Shinobu's mind is now completely closed off to the rest of the world and she doesn't even notice the pervert grip the hem of her skirt while her inner monologue continues
'But I can't die yet, not without telling Sempai how I feel about him' to which the cynical part of her mind responds 'and what would he say? That he loves me back? He loves Naru-sempai and there's no changing that. Why would he want an unattractive girl like me who is always in the way and won't even be a virgin for much longer? It would be better if this monster would just kil-'
"GET THE HELL AWAY FROM HER YOU BASTARD!" roared a voice breaking her mental train of thought.
In her current state of mind, she barely registered the fact that her attacker had just been knocked away from her and was currently having his face rearranged and a very sensitive part of his anatomy kneed repeatedly.
Once Shinobu's rescuer thought that he got the point across to the rapist he turned to go check on the girl.
"Hey miss are you alright, did that guy hurt yo- oh my god Shinobu-chan is that you?! Are you hurt? Did that guy touch you? Please Shinobu-chan, you have to tell me if you're hurt!"
Briefly revived from her state of shock when she heard her name Shinobu looked up to see who was calling to her.
"Sempai" she whispered.
"Shinobu-chan thank god you're alright! Please you have to tell me if that guy did anything to you, this is really important, please tell me!" Keitaro urged the shaken girl.
Shinobu just stared up at him and thought 'He came.'
While he is waiting for a reply from his young friend Keitaro looked over Shinobu to see if she's been hurt.
'Please god, don't tell me I was too late.' Apart from a few scrapes and bruises she seemed to be unharmed, 'Only her shirt is torn and her skirt is still on. I hope this means I wasn't too late' he thought to himself.
Keitaro finally noticed that her shirt was now little more than scrapes of cloth on the ground and that her breasts are fully exposed to the world, so he removed his own coat without a seconds thought and wrapped the girl up to protect her modesty.
Once this was done Keitaro looked at Shinobu's face, still waiting for an answer. When it was obvious that she was in too much shock for him to get any information out of her, he said "Shinobu-chan listen, I need to get you back home as quickly as possible so I'm gonna carry you, OK?"
He waited for her to say something but when she just stared at him blankly he sighed and picked her up.
"Don't worry Shinobu-chan I'll get you home in no time, you'll see; I won't let anything bad happen to you."
Shinobu stayed silent but his words register 'He came. He saved me'.
As Keitaro passed the man who tried to harm the sweetest person Keitaro had ever know in one of the worst ways imaginable, he was filled with rage and kicked the man in the crotch as hard as he could before running back to the Hinata leaving the unconscious man to die for all he cared.
As Keitaro ran as fast as he dared for fear his natural clumsiness would appear and hurt the girl further he thought 'oh god what am I going to do Shinobu-chan was almost rap- Fuck for all I know she was raped! I swear to every and any god listening that I'll hunt that bastard down and kill him with my bare hands if he did rape her'.
He looked down to check on his young friend and saw that she was still staring at him blankly."Don't worry Shinobu-chan we'll be home soon enough with the other girls - oh crap the girls!"
Keitaro realised that returning home with an obviously distressed Shinobu, half naked in his arms might not get the best reaction from the residents (two particular tenants came to mind) and what Shinobu didn't need right now is to see him fly through the air very fast.
'Damn Shinobu-chan needs help but if I get blasted to main-land china before I get a chance to explain who knows what could happen to her. I need someone who would know what to do in this type of situation but not fly off the handle the moment they see us..... of course Haruka! She'll know what to do!'
Looking down at her cradled in his arms he said "Hey Shinobu-chan slight change of plans we're going to see Haruka in her tea rooms OK?" hoping for a response from her but she remained silent.
Shinobu knew he's talking but doesn't understand what he is saying; the only thing she knew right now was what she kept repeating in her mind.' He came. He saved me'.
Once they arrived at the tea rooms Keitaro found it was starting to close for the night and so decided to go in around the back entrance to spare Shinobu the embarrassment of walking through a room of strangers half naked. Luckily for him and Shinobu, Haruka usually kept the back door open and today is no exception. He rushed in, deposits Shinobu on the sofa and called out
"Haruka I Need Your Help Back Here!"
Over the years Keitaro and his aunt have formed an informal system and it's doubtful that Keitaro even noticed it but Haruka knew that when Keitaro didn't call her 'Aunt' it usually means the shit has hit the fan.
"Keitaro what's wrong?!" Haruka asked as she walked into her living area.
"Its Shinobu-chan something terrible has happened to her!" said the distraught nephew as he led his aunt over to where he had left Shinobu. When he sat Shinobu down on the sofa his jacket had fallen off her so the first thing Haruka notices was that Shinobu was naked from the top up.
"FUCK KEI WHAT THE HELL HAPPENED TO HER?!" she yelled as she rushed to Shinobu's side to see if she was alright.
Keitaro proceeded to tell his aunt what had just happened, how he saw a girl being attacked, when he rescued her it turned out to be Shinobu, that she has only said one word since he found her and why he chose to come see her instead of going straight up to the dorm.
"God Haruka I don't even know if she was raped or not, I mean her skirt and everything is still on so that's a good sign right Haruka? Right Haruka? Please tell me that's a good sign!" Begged the woman's nephew.
Haruka saw that he was nearly hysterical and tried to calm him down "Keitaro I'm not going to lie to you, right now I don't know if she was or not, I can find out bu-"
"Just FUCKING do it Haruka! I have to know if the beating I gave that guy was enough or if I have to go back and kill him!"
"KEITARO URASHIMA CALM DOWN NOW!" She yelled at him. When she saw that he had visibly calmed down she went on to say "Firstly you running around and screaming bloody murder is only going to make things worse and secondly if I want to find out if she's been raped I have to check to see if she's still a virgin. Do you understand?"
Keitaro gave her a confused look and she sighed, 'He can be such idiot sometimes'. "Fine I'll put it in a way that even you will understand. I have to look at Shinobu-chans vagina. OK? "
Despite the situation Keitaro blushed and said "O-oh I s-see. I'll just go and wait in the other roo-".
"NOOOOOOO" Before he can even finish his sentence Shinobu broke from herself imposed spell at the thought of being separated from her Keitaro, and leapt across the room to his arms weeping.
"Please Sempai don't leave me alone, please only you can protect me!" As she says this she gave him a hug that made one of Su's feel like a firm handshake.
Both of the Urashimas were taken by surprised by this. For one, the normally quiet and reserved girl had just yelled and leaped into the arms of her not-so-secret love interest, something the young girl would never normally do unless she was truly terrified by something and for another, these were the first words she had spoken since he had first found her.
Keitaro looked down at the trembling girl attached to him. He had no idea what he was meant to do in this kind of situation but he did know that he had to calm her down so he gently stroked her blue hair and whispered to her
"It's alright Shinobu-chan, it's alright your safe here you know that, Haruka won't let anyone hurt you and I'll just be in the next room so you don't have to worry about a thing. OK?"
"NO! Don't you understand?! It wasn't her that saved me it was YOU! It wasn't Naru, it wasn't Motoko, it was YOU! I'm only safe with YOU!" The girl shrieked.
Keitaro relented, he could never say no to any of his girls up at the dorm let alone Shinobu, especially in her current state.
"OK Shinobu-chan I won't leave you. Come on, let's sit you back down." He led her over to sofa by the hand where Haruka was waiting.
"You alright Shinobu?" she asked. She nodded briefly but never let go of Keitaros hand.
"OK Shinobu-chan I have to ask you this. Can you remember what that pervert did to you?" she asked softly.
Shinobu shook her head and Haruka sighed once again.
"That's alright Shinobu-chan I understand. Listen I have to check you down there. Do you understand?" She nodded then looked up towards Keitaro.
"Do you want Keitaro stay while I look or should he step outside?"
As she sees the grip on her nephews hand increase to what seems like breaking point Haruka petted her free hand and smiled reassuringly at her. "OK, don't worry he can stay". She reaches into her apron for a wash cloth and handed it Keitaro.
"Here cover your eyes with this" he somehow managed to wrap the cloth around his head even though one had is still trapped by Shinobu.
Once he told her that he's ready she told Shinobu "OK Shinobu I have to take off your underwear and touch you down there, are you ready?"
Shinobu nodded and Haruka says "OK I'm going to start now". She said in a slow measured tone.
Keitaro, blinded by the cloth, could only hear the rustling of material and feel Shinobu squeezing his hand tighter than before.
He heard Haruka sigh and some more rustling before Haruka said "OK Kei you can take that off now". He tore off the blindfold and looked questioningly at his aunt.
"It looks like you got to her in time". She informed him.
Keitaro breathed a huge sigh of relief and pulled her into a hug, kissed her forehead and whispered "Thank god".
"So what now?" he asked aunt.
"Now we go to the police".
Both adults looked at their young friend in surprise.
"Please don't tell anyone about this. Please no one else can find out about this." She begged.
Haruka tried to reason with the distraught girl "Please Shinobu you have to let us call the police. What if this sicko tries to do it again?"
Keitaro sneered at this and told his aunt "Haruka, after what I did to that bastard it would be a medical miracle if he can piss straight let alone rape someone."
Haruka didn't doubt him when he said these uncharacteristic words, but then if you knew Keitaro as long as she had you wouldn't have been surprised at how protective he is of people he loves either.
She did glare at him for being counter-productive and was about to yell at him when Shinobu said
"Please I couldn't stand it if everyone found, please promise me that you won't tell anyone what happened."
Everyone knew about Urashimas and promises, Keitaro being the prime example of this but he had a habit of making promises that were nearly impossible keep and so he has been teaching himself to think things through before committing himself to something. His aunt, being far smarter and level-headed than him and so is able to work in a loop-hole to her promise.
"OK Shinobu-chan we promise not to tell unless we have to, is that alright?"
"Y-you too Sempai?"
"Yes me too Shinobu-chan" trusting his aunt to know what is best to do.
"Thank you" She whispered before the day's events finally caught up to her and she fainted.
They laid the young girl out on the sofa and covered her with a blanket and Haruka went to make some tea for her and her nephew while he watched over Shinobu. When she came back she gave him his cup and he said
"Why her Haruka, out of everyone in the world why her? Out of every person I have ever known or heard of, if there's one person that doesn't deserve it's her".
"These things just happen and we have no control over. Just be thankful that you were able to save her in time."
"But what will happen to her now, you saw how she was how scared she was when I was about to leave her. What if the damage done was more mental or emotional than physical?"
"I don't know Kei, I really don't know." she sighed.
"The girls will be wondering where me and Shinobu are by now." He said absentmindedly.
"Yeah but right now might not be the best time to take her up there."
"You said it yourself, how will Naru and Motoko react to you carrying an unconscious and half naked Shinobu."
He smiled slightly and scratched the back of his head "oh yeah I guess you're right. Um could you - "
"Sneak into the dorm; grab one of Shinobu's shirts without being caught? Consider it done."
"You know I hate it when you do that Aunt Haruka" to which he receives a fan to the side of his head.
"And you know I hate it when you call me aunt!" she not so gently scolds him.
"hehe sorry must of slipped my mind" he said with a smile. He suddenly became more serious and said to her "Thanks Haruka, I really mean it. If you weren't here I would have been completely lost."
"Don't worry about, what use is being your favourite aunt if I can't help you once in a while." She smirks at him knowing what he is going to say next.
"Um aren't you my only aunt." -SMACK-
"I just told you not to call me that."
"But you just... I was just... I give up."
She gave him a small smile and told him to keep an eye on Shinobu while she went to get her clothes. Once he saw that is aunt had gone he walked back over to where his young friend was recovering.
He looked down upon the resting face of his young friend and he was relieved. From looking at her you could never imagine what had nearly happened to her not even an hour ago. Her eyes were covered by a few stray locks of blue hair but all in all she looked... peaceful.
Acting on instinct he reached down to brush the hair to the side of her pretty face. In doing so he woke the poor girl from her sleep. She slowly returned to the realm of conscious people. She looked around and was very surprised to see the smiling face of her Sempai who also had a hand stroking her hair.
"Sempai? Is that you? Where are we?"
"Yes it's me Shinobu-chan and we're down at Haruka's tea shop." He explains to her.
"Tea Shop? Why was I asleep down here? Unless... it wasn't a dream was it Sempai?" She added quietly.
"No I'm afraid it wasn't Shinobu-chan" he replied sadly.
She sat up and looked at her hands resting in her lap. After a minute of silence she began to shake and weep. Seeing this Keitaro scooped her up in his arms and embraced her. He whispered in her ear "Don't worry Shinobu-chan I promise I'll always look after you."
Shinobu escaped from his arms, looked at him and said "Sempai I can't ask you to do that for me, I can't ask you to give up your dreams, what about Naru and Tokyo U and finding your promise girl?"
Keitaro curses himself for doing it again. He was about to make a promise that would change his very life all because he spoke before he thought of the consequences. Shinobu was right, what about Naru and his 15 year old dream of getting into Tokyo U., could he just give all that up? He was still debating within himself when Shinobu's next words froze all his current thoughts.
"Besides I don't want to be a burden to you."
Those ten simple words broke Keitaros heart.
'She thinks she's a burden to me?'
Keitaro thought back over all the memories he has made since he came to Hinata Sou and he realised something. It was always Shinobu. When he was sad it was her smiling face that cheered him up, it was her that cheered him on whenever he lost faith in himself, her that made him his favourite food after a long days work, was always worried about him when he got 'punished'. Through it all it was always Shinobu that was there for him.
'No I'm sure that can't be right' he thought to himself. He then closely examines the other girls under his care:
First there was Su the sweet little girl who had adopted him as her spare Onii-san. While there was never any malicious intent in her 'Hello-kicks' or any of the times she used him as a test subject she still caused him a lot of pain.
Secondly there was Kitsune. While she rarely caused him pain directly she has always delighted in playing with his emotions in order to skip out on rent or to get some free sake. She was always tricking him into compromising positions in which he would get in trouble for. He knew it was all in good fun for her but she still caused him a lot of pain.
Thirdly there was Motoko, the beautiful kendo-girl. You would have thought that after all the time's he had helped her, shown her how kind he can be she would listen to his side of the story once in a while. Even though she only did it because she felt it necessary to protect her friends it still caused him a lot of pain.
Finally there was Naru the girl he loved, the girl who he opened up his heart to, the girl he was willing to give up his promise girl for. The girl had hurt him the most, always willing to take others sides over his, never listening to what he wants, even though he loved her she still caused him a lot of pain.
His mind drifted back to the girl in his arms and thought
'The closest thing to an angel on this earth and she thinks she's a burden to me?!'
Keitaro has always loved the young chief but he was unsure if it was a brotherly love or something more that he felt for her, the feeling was there though and it was defiantly love.
He thought about all the help she has given him since they met, everything that she has done for him. He thought of all times he has made her sad, made her cry, disappointed her and through all this she stuck by him.
'She truly is an angel.' he thinks to himself.
Then he feels something he has never felt before.
Disgust with himself.
In that moment he sees what he thinks he truly is.
'I'm no better than that rapist.' He thought to himself.
Like a rapist he has used Shinobu countless time and not five seconds ago he was going to agree with Shinobu, that he shouldn't put his life on hold for her.
'What kind of person am I? This angel has always been there for me and I was about to abandon her, discard her like she was nothing.'
He started to feel sick at the thought of what he nearly did. He looked straight into the eyes of one of the people he considers most important and started to cry.
Shinobu saw this and thought that she was the cause. She tried to leave his arms but he pulled her closer to him and she heard him whispering
"I'm so sorry, please forgive me. I'm so sorry, please forgive me. I'm so sorry, please ..."
Over and over again he recited those words. She pulled back and looked at his tear filled eyes. She had never seen him like this before and never wanted to again.
"S-sempai? What's wrong? Please tell me I want to help you; I hate it when your sad Sempai please stop crying." Her words reached him and he stopped what he is saying to look at the girl.
"Sempai please tell me what you think you've done to be sorry about."
"I'm a terrible person Shinobu." He said looking away, unable to meet her eye.
"No you're not Sempai, what made you think you're a terrible person. You're the most wonderful person I know and one of my closest friends."
Keitaro flinched when she said this. "I don't deserve to be called your friend Shinobu-chan. What kind of friend would even think of abandoning you when you need them most? When you tried to talk me out of my promise to you I actually thought about listening to you. I actually thought about abandoning you for my own needs. Even after all the help and support you've given me since we met, I was willing to walk away from you. That's why I'm a terrible person and I don't deserve your friendship or your forgiveness." as he finished he started to cry again.
"Sempai" Shinobu said with tears in her eyes "whether you think you deserve them of not you have them. You don't even have to ask for them. You are my dearest friend, always trying to protect me, making sure that I'm happy and not an hour ago you saved my life. Because of you I'm alive and I wasn't raped and you will always have my friendship and forgiveness." She gathered all her courage and gave Keitaro a peck on the lips.
Keitaro was far too happy to be embarrassed by this and he hugged the girl to him, saying thank you over and over again. Shinobu didn't mind this as she was just happy that he was happy and that he was still part of her life.
They stayed like this for the next five minutes before someone cleared their throat and said "Not that I mind but some but some people might jump to the wrong conclusion if they see you hugging a shirtless girl in your lap."
Both of them looked up, their tears long since dried to see Haruka with a shirt in her hand and a small smile upon her lips.
It took a minute for what she said to register with both of them. When it did they both looked down to confirm that Shinobu was indeed topless and still being hugged by Keitaro, which made them both turn a deep shade of red and while Shinobu dived for the blanket that covered her a little while ago Keitaro looked for something to stop be blood pouring out his nose.
Haruka laughed lightly at the two before her. She handed Shinobu the shirt and told her to put it on. She waited until the two have composed themselves enough to get a coherent sentence out of them.
"It's good to see that you somewhat back to your old self Shinobu-chan, but I'm afraid I'm going to have to ask you if your sure about not going to the police."
Shinobu looked at the floor while saying "I'm sorry but I don't want anyone else to know what nearly happened to me. I couldn't live with myself if everyone knew." As she thought about how humiliated she would be if everyone found out she begins to tear up. That is until she felt someone squeeze her hand. She stared at the hand and follows it up the arm and into the eyes of Keitaro.
"Shinobu-chan whatever you decide me and Haruka will support you. I promised you that I'll always look after you and I plan on doing just that in any way possible. And don't even think of trying to talk me out of it." he said smiled warmly at her
"Sempai." Shinobu murmured as her eyes once again fill with tears. She soon found herself in his arms again with him softly stroking her hair.
Across from the pair Haruka looked at her nephew and she had never felt as proud of him as she did right now. She could hear the conviction in his voice and she knew that no matter what he would keep this promise.
As the two separated from one another Shinobu looked at Haruka and saw her nod and smile in agreement at what Keitaro just said.
"OK then are you two ready to go up stairs now the girls are probably wondering where you are by now."
Keitaro stiffened as he hears this and realized what is likely to happen to him if he turns up late with Shinobu. He looked towards Haruka for help.
"Don't worry Kei I'll be coming up with you to stop any misunderstandings."
So the three of them left the Tea rooms together and made their way up the Stone Staircase. Haruka allowed her two companions to go ahead so she can observe them. Apart from the fact that they were both a bit more nervous than usual (which is understandable seeing as what had just happened to Shinobu and what was likely about to happen to Keitaro) and that Shinobu was standing closer to him than her shyness would usually allow nothing seemed out of the ordinary. Haruka wasn't sure if this was a good thing of not but she believed that either one or two things had happened. Either Shinobu has developed a dependence on her nephew and could possibly become distressed if she spends any amount of time away from him or the relationship between the two has moved to a new level. What level this is will remain to be seen but it's obvious to nearly everyone how Shinobu feels about him and from how he acts around the young chief it's obvious that he cares about her but as to the nature of this affection is unknown to everyone.
Her musings were interrupted when she heard a woman yell "WHERE THE HELL HAVE YOU BEEN AND WHAT HAVE YOU BEEN DOING TO SHINOBU!"
Haruka sighs and picks up the pace to catch up with her nephew.
As soon as Keitaro and Shinobu reached the top of the stairs they heard
"WHERE THE HELL HAVE YOU BEEN AND WHAT HAVE YOU BEEN DOING TO SHINOBU!"
Both Keitaro and Shinobu flinched when they heard the voice and Keitaro started to shake in fear.
"N-Naru I haven't been doing anything to Shinobu-chan".
"LAIR, I KNOW WHAT PERVERTS LIKE YOU DO TO INNOCENT GIRLS LIKE SHINOBU, NOW STAND STILL AND TAKE YOUR PUNISHMENT!"
Naru pulled her arm back and let swing her strongest punch ever to deal with the pervert once and for all.
Imagine everyone's surprise when instead of a flying pervert they see a very pissed off looking Haruka with Narus fist safely in the palm of her hand.
To say that Haruka was angry was like saying that the North Pole was slightly chilly. Normally Haruka didn't involve herself in her nephews squabbles with his tenants, deciding that he was old enough to fight his own battles but after everything that just happened there was no way in hell that she would allow him to be punished for this.
Haruka pushed Naru back and she fell on the ground and said
"Both Keitaro and Shinobu have been helping me out down at the tea rooms. They asked me to call up here to tell you but I was too busy and it slipped my mind. So if you have a problem with that I suggest you take it up with me rather than my nephew."
She glared at each of the tenants in turn to make sure that none of them have a problem with that.
"Good, now if I see my nephew fly across the sky tonight I will be very annoyed is that clear?" Even Keitaro nodded his head at her. Satisfied that her point had been made she continued "Now it's been a long hard day so I'm going to down to my tea shop and have a drink, I may be up later to use the hot springs if I can be bothered walking up the steps again but if I don't come up it means I don't want to be disturbed tonight unless it's an emergency."
Only once she was certain that Haruka was out of ear shot Kitsune was the first to snap out of her thoughts and said
"Well that was unexpected wasn't it?"
~11 O'clock Managers room~
We find our lovable hero Keitaro lying awake in his futon staring at the ceiling unable to sleep with all of the day's events ruining through his mind. At the front of his mind was his poor Shinobu-chan and whether she is really coping with what happened or if she's just hiding it away. This thought then led to the revelation of Shinobu believing she was a burden on him and the others. He would have to find a way to boost her confidence and to reassure her that she wasn't a burden on anyone. This then led to him thinking about how he was meant to do anything without raising suspicion with the other girls. Thinking of this then led to another dozen issues that needed to be addressed which is why we find Keitaro awake at a time he would either be studying for the a test or sleeping the sleep of the exhausted. A soft knocking on his door interrupted his thought process.
He groggily turned on his side to face the door "Who is it?" he asks.
The door slowly opened to reveal a quite distressed Shinobu dressed in her pyjamas "um sorry to be um bothering you this late Sempai but um..."
"Shinobu-chan what's wrong is there something that I can help you with" he asked with a voice full of concern.
"Um Sempai I'm-m scared to sleep by myself tonight. S-so I w-was wondering if I could s-stay w-with you?"
Keitaro froze. What should he do? If the other girls found out they would kill him! And with Naru always poking her head through that hole we would be cau-
While his mind was going a mile a minute he suddenly remembered the promise he made to her.
'I can't believe that I'd nearly broke my promise I only made to her a few hours ago' he scolds himself
Looking at Shinobu he smiled, slid over to the other side of the futon and said "Of course you can Shinobu-chan".
The look of relief that flooded her face was enough to banish any misgivings about letting her stay with him. When she lay down facing him he noticed she was shaking so he wrapped his arms around her giving her the comfort that she was looking for.
"Thank you Sempai I'm sorry for being such a bother to you." she says with a slight blush on her cheeks and her eyes unable met his.
Keitaro took the arm that was not trapped under Shinobu and used his hand to gently lift her face so their eyes met and to softly stroke her cheek with his thumb.
"Shinobu-chan, never think of yourself as a bother or a burden. If you ever need help please just ask, if you're sad, lonely, angry, confused please come see me so I can help you."
Shinobu saw the sincerity in his eyes and blushed even more "Thank you".
Keitaro smiled and tenderly kisses her on the forehead and says "Anything for you my Angel now get some rest OK."
Shinobu snuggled against his chest in order to feel better and she smiled. She might not know what would happen tomorrow, but right now? She was safe.
Well that's the end of my first ever attempt at writing fan fiction. I hope you all enjoyed it. Don't know if I'll be writing any more to this or not but I'll just have to wait and see if I get any inspiration. I do have some ideas basically showing Shinobu's growing dependence on Keitaro and maybe a scene where all the girls find out. But what do you people think should I leave this as a one-shot or try to continue it? Any ideas about what should happen (if I do use an idea of yours ill be sure to give you credit), any ways to improve or just any mistakes that you find please tell me. If you enjoyed it please tell me why if you hated it don't just say so. Please give a reason otherwise I can never improve. Any ways please leave a review regardless of your opinions.
1) I have no idea when this is set in the LH timeline but I know it's before Kei and Naru get together.
2)I also have no idea how old Shin is in this as when I was writing this I never gave it much thought till near the end so your guess is as good as mine.
3) If you're pissed off because of the things I said about Shin at the beginning don't be. I think her and Kanako are the best characters and what I said was sort of meant to be from Shin's perspective and how she feels in comparison to her friends with her low self esteem
4) If I do continue this Fic it will most likely be a keiXshin fic as the majority out there are Motoko based and while they are good stories I think there is a deficit of Shin fics
Well that's all I can think of but if you have any questions just ask and I'll try to get back to you.
I wouldn't normally answer a negative anonymous review since they are unlikely to see it but I felt like I should answer this one.
Electric Sheep - First of all thank you correcting me on my spelling. As I've said in answer to another review I am dyslexic and I do have trouble with my spelling. As for the change from first person to third person I don't see what you mean. If you are talking about past and present tense then yes it was wrong of me to do so and find it annoying and hard to read in my own fics but I do try and catch them. If you are talking about telling the story as if a character was telling the story (for example: "He approached me") I never did that unless you are talking about the parts in italic and with '~~' surrounding them. Those are what the character is thinking and not a change of perspective.
Secondly I don't quite understand what you meant by 'the only people who can appreciate this story are untrained readers and writers who are more experienced than I am and can tolerate mistakes like this' just because I forgot the 'e' in alley. I am not a professional writer and never claimed to be. This was my first attempt at writing something that would be read by more than a class of teenagers during an English lesson and I didn't and still don't have someone else looking over my chapter before I post them, just me who would be absolutely lost without spell check as I'm rubbish at spelling. As for the repetitive words I do try not to do that but I can't always catch them.
As for reading other books, with all due respect you know nothing about me. Just because I'm writing a fic about a manga doesn't mean that's all I read. I enjoy James Herbert, have read a few of Wilbur Smiths books as well as most of Terry Pratchetts books in the discworld series. And when you say I should read more 'to figure out which expressions have already been used' are you saying that once a set of words in a particular order has been written that no one else can use them? Because if you are then that's just stupid.
You next point is 'Stop copying other people. Write your OWN goddam story' it would help if you say what I copied. To my knowledge I have read only one other Love Hina fic which has a scene similar to mine at the very end of the fic and that was with Naru not Shinobu. Even so it is my take on a particular scenario. There are loads of Love Hina fic on this site that deal with Keitaro and Motoko losing to her sister and have to get married/ become a couple yet the fact that that idea has been done to death doesn't mean that new versions of it aren't worth reading.
Your final comment and the one stating that I should 'Write your OWN goddam story' is what made me want to reply even though you probably won't read it. 'Don't write when you're horny or thinking about sex. If you need to write that kind of stuff, make a lemon, it doesn't belong in a "desperate plea for escape from rape" scene.' ??? What the hell are you talking about?! I'm presuming that you've only read the first chapter so what part exactly made you think that I was horny when I wrote this? Was it when Keitaro noticed that her top had been torn off revealing her breasts or where Haruka has to check Shinobu to see if she was raped? Or maybe the part where she nearly was raped? Perhaps that's what turns you on but don't believe that because these scenes are included in other peoples work that they find this type of thing arousing.