Warnings: Slash, Ron bashing, Dumbledore bashing, spoilers through book 5 of Harry Potter, spoilers through chapter 20 of Ouran High School Host Club manga, totally AU, bit of a dry start

Disclaimers: Harry Potter belongs to Joanne Kathleen Rowling and affiliates, of which I am not one. Ouran belongs to Bisuko Hatori and affiliates, again I am not one. Not part of the HPatHC universe.

Features: Happy!Harry, !Takashi (he's so amazing that there doesn't need to be anything before the exclamation point), Pretty!Hermione, BattybutAwesome!Luna, Teacher!Remus, and the rest of the Host Club being themselves.

Insert Witty Title Here

It had been two years, and Harry didn't regret a minute of it. Well, maybe first couple of months, but he had gotten over that.

At the end of Harry's fifth year, Sirius died. Harry fell into a pit of depression, the weight of some prophecy that had been made not long before his birth pressing down on him. It was like he bore the weight of the world on his shoulders. Until he overheard some interesting information that is. On the last night of fifth year, while most of the rest of the school was at the Farewell Feast, Harry could be found stalking the halls, depressed over Sirius' death.

As it just so happened, so could Luna Lovegood. He ended up helping her find her lost things, even when she said she didn't need the help. But she was his friend, and Harry was going to stick by her. It seemed as novel a concept to her as it had to Harry a few years ago, which made him all the better for volunteering in the first place. He used a little known feature of the Marauder's Map – Sirius had told him all the map's secrets – to locate items that weren't where they were meant to be. Most of Luna's things were in the Room of Requirement.

That was when they found this weird tiara-thing that Luna went bat-shit crazy over (said something about a Diadem being infested with snabolmaps). She stuck it in her hand bag and insisted that he let her into the Chamber of Secrets.

Something that Harry had learned was that you do not go against a girl on a mission. Mostly through watching Ron try to stem Hermione at every opportunity. So he acquiesced, but insisted that they find Luna's things first since that had been the entire point of the journey. He then took her to the Chamber, where Luna took the tiara-thingy and, for some reason unknown, stabbed the central gem with the remaining basilisk fang before putting it with the rest of her things and acting as if nothing had happened.

When they came back up, it was only by chance that they heard Dumbledore talking to Ron and Hermione, asking them to keep tabs on Harry, try to keep him on a certain track. Ron said he would do as he had always done and there was no need to remind him of his job; Hermione was aghast and outright refused.

One week later, Luna told Harry what the "Diadem" was, what the snabolmaps were doing in it, and that there were apparently others. She also said they smelled like snake.

Not that Harry understood what she meant. He was ore intent on leaving the country. Leaving a note saying something about the "horcruxes" that Luna had told him about, he took both Luna and Hermione with him when he went to the first place he could think of; Japan. Xenophilius Lovegood and the Grangers came as well, though neither were very accepting of Harry paying to have their daughters enrolled somewhere. But Harry wanted a solid education away from the magical eye, and neither family could afford to place Hermione and Luna in the school chosen.

Harry and Hermione joined the first year high school class several months into their school year, in mid-July (the end of the summer break at Ouran apparently), while Luna joined the last year of middle school students. Hermione took first place in classes from a boy by the name of Haninozuka who looked like he was maybe ten or eleven, yet acted very manly (or tried to for a while) and just so happened to be the Karate Club Captain. He was also a sucker for Harry's home-made cupcakes, which he refused to admit until after he'd eaten three whole batches... in one day.

At the end of that first year, Harry, Hermione, and Luna had gained a sort of tentative friendship with Haninozuka Mitsukuni and his cousin/body guard (of sorts) Morinozuka Takashi. Or, rather, they could talk to one another easily (though Takashi didn't actually talk much), but there was always something between them. They had both joined the Black Magic Club as well, finding the rituals interesting, and the Traditional Japanese Magic to be more than a little intoxicating in its own way. Nekozawa Umehito, the club president, was quite glad to not be the only wizard at Ouran. Hermione had joined the school's Orchestra, and Harry was in the Football Club.

Luna, meanwhile, had made friends with a French boy who seemed far too affectionate to every girl he met. Hermione had to slap him three times before he understood that she was not to be flirted with.

The next year brought something called a "Host Club" to Ouran, as well as news from Britain in the form of Remus Lupin, the new second year literature teacher and the only person who was more affected by Sirius' death than Harry was, for not-so-obvious reasons to most. Apparently, several "horcruxes" had been found by the Order and Dumbledore was currently seeking Harry out to kill Voldemort for him. So Harry spent the next few months until summer vacation plotting ways to deal with Voldemort, though he never seriously considered actually killing the snake-man.

On the last day of school before summer vacation, Harry was out flying in the mountains when Voldemort appeared. As well as Dumbledore. Remus had accidentally ratted out his location – for which Harry whole-heartedly forgave him – Dumbledore dueled Voldemort, and with the Heir of Slytherin distracted, Harry cast the Killing Curse.

He then extracted an Unbreakable Vow that Dumbledore would not reveal Harry's location (or Hermione's, Luna's, the Grangers', Mr. Lovegood's, and Remus' for that matter) or the location of Voldemort's death within six thousand miles. They could worship him all they wanted; they would simply see neither hide nor hair of him in that time.

The next week and most of summer vacation was spent brooding in the attic of the house that Hermione's parents had bought while the Grangers and Lovegoods were at the beach for vacation. Harry had claimed he needed to reassess things now that Voldemort was dead.

His brooding went on pause on the last day of vacation when the Grangers returned and informed him that the Lovegoods were hosting a dinner and that he should come. Harry agreed, albeit reluctantly, and found himself at the house that Xenophilius was renting on the other side of Tokyo. He was surprised to see that they had invited muggles – Luna's French friend Tamaki, Tamaki's friend Kyouya, Harry and Hermione's sort-of friends Mitsukuni and Takashi, their actual-friend Umehito (not a muggle, but whatever), and two red-headed twins from the middle-school section named Hikaru and Kaoru who reminded Harry of younger, more introverted Weasley Twins – and more so that those same muggles had been invited to such a blatantly magical home.

The fact that Tamaki's mother was apparently Luna's aunt twice removed was rather strange, but what about her wasn't? Xenophilius had a "the more the merrier" attitude about his family and felt that friends were as good as family, which had been a bit strange at first, but Harry had grown used to being Xeno's pseudo-son. Though the fact this these people whom Luna liked and Harry sorta-liked being told so easily about magic was very strange.

Then again, Harry was still getting used to the increased drinking age – 20 rather than the 18 of England – so it was hardly a surprise to find him ignorant of the laws regarding secrecy in Japan.

The knowledge that Harry had killed someone didn't go over too well with everyone else though.

By the time September had rolled around, Hermione was involved with a boy the next year up, Luna had joined the Black Magic Club, and Harry had stopped hanging out with the Football Club except for practices and games, at which times he ran himself ragged. He had gone into full-on recluse mode, and his sour mood repelled anyone who might have wanted to speak with him. Remus tried to help, but failed.

In October, Hermione broke it off with her boyfriend, claiming him to be too shallow, and kidnapped Harry from the apartment he was renting. The action surprised him since he was in the middle of doing his Literature homework (Remus would give him a bit of leeway, but Harry didn't want to take advantage of the werewolf) and school had let out only an hour before. When Mr. Granger dropped them back off at school, Harry was extra confused considering he was unaware of anything special happening that day.

It wasn't until they arrived in the Third Music Room in the North Building that he realized where they were going. He stopped her by digging his heels into the marble.

"Hermione, I'm a guy," he stated calmly. She didn't seem to comprehend. "The Host Club caters to girls."

"They cater to whomever wishes to be catered to," Hermione snorted. "And it isn't all Tamaki-kun romancing girls you know. That's just the more annoying aspects. Now come on; I already got Kyouya-kun to give us an appointment." Sadly, Hermione was a girl on a mission. Harry knew when he was beaten, and there was no winning against Hermione.

The sight of Hermione dragging Harry through the doors caused quite a hush to fall over the girls who were spending their afternoon with the Host Club. Harry sighed and tried to make himself look small, though it didn't work very well, as this seemed to draw ever more eyes to him. Probably made it look like he had come of his own free will too.

Not that Harry was ashamed of his sexuality, but he knew where he wasn't wanted. The mix of the Hosts not talking to him – which, admittedly, might have had something to do with him hiding – and the stares and whispers from the young ladies of Ouran in their pale yellow dresses (god-awful things that Hermione and Luna refused to wear, thank Merlin) made that apparent. And even if he were welcome, Harry had no desire to advertise his preferences, nor force his attentions upon the Hosts.

"Hermione-no-kimi, Potter-kun," Kyouya seemed to appear from nowhere, his own flock of fangirls following obediently.

"Drop that suffix, please," Hermione grimaced. "It sounds so... just drop it." It was no secret among the Ouran students that Harry, Hermione, and Luna were all "commoners". Harry was simply a very rich commoner who didn't want to attend the school without his friends. Despite this, or perhaps because of it, they all found it very strange that the trio of Brits didn't particularly care to be treated as well as the Ouran student body. "We can wait the ten minutes until our appointment."

"Of course Hermione," some girls giggled at Kyouya's complete drop of suffix, but it wasn't any great surprise. By virtue of Tamaki and Luna being cousin-friends, Kyouya was roped into being her friend and was at least familiar with Hermione if not completely friendly. After the dinner in July, Harry's interactions with Luna's friends and his own had barely stayed at cordial. "You and Potter-kun may go over there to wait. Mori-senpai and Hani-senpai should be ready for you soon. Have a nice day."

Harry felt his eyebrows rise up as Hermione dragged him along behind her to the indicated table. "That's what this is about?" He asked when they were seated and being eavesdropped upon by the smallest number of people. "You want me to make friends with Takashi-kun and Kuni-chan (1) again?"

"Naturally," Hermione smiled knowingly at him. "Why else would I bring you here?" Harry's response was to glare.

"Hermione, they're the ones who didn't like what they were told," I was just the one who didn't want to tell them, he amended mentally, but forged on, feigning obliviousness to the eavesdroppers. A boy coming to the Host Club was always a juicy bit of gossip. "They all were like that."

"You didn't exactly give them any opportunity to react," admonished the elder of the two. Harry mentally winced, but externally he didn't react. He really hadn't given them any opportunity, but when they all stared at him with those accusing gazes… well, Harry couldn't not run away. He didn't need to hear their opinions because they had been written clear as day on everyone's faces.

Even Takashi's, and that was saying something.

After a moment Harry scowled and looked out the window. The early autumn leaves fell prettily and were a far better thing to ponder than his dilapidated friendships.

"Shouldn't you be looking to patch up things between Ume-kun and I first?" Umehito had actually already known about Harry defeating Voldemort – it had been all over every wizarding periodical – but their friendship was strained by Harry's solitary nature.

Hermione's own eye roll at Harry's behavior shut him up soundly once more and he continued contemplating the leaves.

Then a bubbly blond boy of sixteen – precisely seven months younger than Harry (2) – bounced over so suddenly that Harry jolted as Mitsukuni landed on the opposite end of the couch Harry had claimed. Hermione was sitting in the chair next to Mitsukuni's end, which left only the space between Mitsukuni and Harry for Takashi to take.

He didn't even hesitate.

"Good afternoon Harry-chan, Maini-chan!" Mitsukuni piped happily. "It's been forever since we've seen you, right Takashi?"

"Aa," was the response, a standard that Harry was accustomed to. What he was not familiar with was the slight smile on Takashi's face as he looked at the wizard. It was strange that he should take Harry being within the same room as him outside of classes so well.

Harry was a murderer after all, even if he hadn't wanted to do it. Prophecy and action, that was what it was, and Harry damned himself for it frequently.

In retrospect, it must be said that he actually regretted a lot of those two years, but the recollection of his reunion was nice regardless. Though he was rather irked that Hermione hadn't told him that she was taking the cupcakes he had made earlier that day, or he might have not looked so surprised when Hermione brought out a box (seemingly from nowhere, but really from a small pocket dimension that she kept in her school bag) containing Harry's cupcakes.

Mitsukuni liked them though, so that was good. Even if he would now have to make yet another batch for the up-coming Halloween party… scratch that, he would have to make quite a few batches now that he knew Mitsukuni wouldn't hold the dinner party against his cooking.

Over the next hour during their appointment – Hermione had booked it specially with Kyouya – Harry found that they didn't hold what he had done against him either. Harry felt like a royal prick, but at least he could spend his free periods doing something other than making sure he didn't run into the boys in his class (it was rather difficult).

The coming months brought Harry closer to his friends, and he became a regular at the Host Club on Wednesdays (his only club-free day each week). Not to force his affections on the Host boys, but to make sure he had time to talk to the members… the ones he actually knew anyway.

Valentines Day crept up on Harry completely unawares, and he hadn't even realized when he came that Wednesday with his usual treat for whichever Host he was visiting (Takashi today; he also had cupcakes for Mitsukuni as usual) that he had made chocolate (3). It made him highly embarrassed when he walked in and saw the decorations to realize just what he had done.

Though, to be fair, the only "celebration" of Valentines Day he had ever observed was being tackled by a dwarf dressed up as cupid in the middle of a crowded castle hallway. It made sense that he should forget about it.

That didn't stop him from wanting to smash his head in.

A month later, Harry found a small white box on his desk with a necklace inside – a simple dark green stone on a leather thong, quite simple for Ouran – and he couldn't help the blush that crawled up his cheeks. If Hermione hadn't told him that morning about White Day (4), he wouldn't have had a clue. And Harry had only given one person a Valentines Day gift, accidental as it may have been.

He hurriedly stuffed the box in his bag and, though he did put the necklace on later – it was his style, honestly – he was still terribly embarrassed by it. Instead, he focused on the last study day before Final Exams were to begin on Thursday.

Later that same day, when he came to visit the Host Club, Harry also found out that the appointment sign-up for Takashi on Wednesdays had been changed to Morinozuka Takashi and Potter Harry, which was kind of flattering (though Harry hadn't realized that he really did only designate Takashi and Mitsukuni), but it was also strange to be made an "honorary member" of the Host Club. The fact that Takashi had immediately noticed he was wearing the necklace and smiled at him – Sweet Circe, who knew Takashi could smile like that? - only made Harry more embarrassed... and yet pleased. He could freely admit that he did feel something beyond friendship for Takashi (and how could he not? Takashi was perfect in all aspects but for a few flaws that were actually rather flattering), but it was still kind of awkward.

After all, Takashi was only being polite, even if Harry hadn't meant to give him chocolates on Valentines Day.

Though Harry couldn't help but curious when, at a dinner for the three British Ouran students hosted by the Grangers, Luna had her own Beelzenef doll. It was cute, though the subliminal messages were annoying. The fact that this Beelzenef was white with black eyes and bore a red ribbon did not escape Harry or Hermione.

Friday afternoon, when the Exams were over and Hermione had quit agonizing over them, she could be found threatening to do things to Umehito if he ever hurt her "sister". The effect was rather ruined by Luna finding them and giving Umehito a big hug. It was kind of cute though.

Meanwhile, Harry found out exactly how serious Takashi had been in giving him a White Day gift. Quite serious, as it turned out.

By the time that meeting was over, Harry was quite certain that his lips were bruised.

"So... what does this mean?" Harry asked tentatively after a moment. Takashi's eyes seemed to boring into him as they both panted. Harry could still taste the C-menu onigiri that Takashi had had for lunch that day.

When Takashi leaned in again, his lips brushed Harry's cheek as he whispered in Harry's ear a simple, "Mine."

Harry had never really belonged to someone before. He couldn't help but allow a pleasant shudder to run down his spine.

The next months seemed to fly by as a new girl by the name of Fujioka Haruhi joined the Host Club – though almost no one knew that she was not a he – and with the activities for his many Clubs – Black Magic, Football, and his sort-of membership to the Host Club – Harry found himself busy in his final year of high school.

So the day before his eighteenth birthday, even as he should have been getting ready for the contest in the following week to get the Central Salon for the Football Club (not that they stood much chance against the American Football Club or the Host Club), Harry was pleased to simply be able to enjoy himself. The fact that Takashi had settled in beside him made thins all the better. He leaned on the taller boy lazily, not even bothering to pay attention to the scenery of the Morinozuka gardens that he had long since memorized.

"Harry," Takashi murmured. Harry peeked an eye open and tilted his head from the shoulder/pillow that his head was on to show he was paying attention. But Takashi didn't continue, simply laying a kiss on the place where Harry had once had a lightning-bold shaped scar.

Harry could only look at him in confusion for a moment before he realized what Takashi meant by it. His eyes widened further before softening and he nuzzled his face into Takashi's neck instead of the shoulder he had previously utilized.

"I love you too," he murmured as Takashi buried his face in shaggy black hair. The smile Harry felt on the top of his head was all the answer necessary.

Author's Note: As I said before, this has NOTHING to do with Harry Potter and the Host Club. This is a one-shot, and that is all... though I'm really tempted to write some scenes from this. But I'll try not to. The point is, this is not me trying to start another story. If you want to use anything from this to write your own, fine. Have at it. I thought the entire thing up Thursday after school.

In other news, Happy Birthday to Marauder Heir! I hope you liked your gift :D

Hm, dunno really how it turned out. I've never written a one-shot crossover before. I've only got HPatHC and I tried writing a HP/Naruto xover once, but it didn't work out that well and was summarily dropped. Quite the information dump at the start of the story though... ehheh...

Well, hope you lot liked it. I was intending to take Thursday/Friday/Saturday off so I could keep up with my social obligations... I guess I kinda did since this isn't HPatHC, but it's still writing, HP/Ouran, and Takashi/Harry. Oh well.

If you couldn't tell, the side-pairings were Neko/Luna, future!Tamaki/Hermione, and past!Sirius/Remus. I was going to do Tamaki/Haruhi and Kasanoda/Hermione, but I decided against it.

(1) Hani always has to have a cute nickname... and I wrote this part around midnight on Saturday. So there.

(2) Harry was born July 31, Hani on February 29 the following year (Takashi is May 5, same year as Harry)

(3) In Japan, girls give the guy they like chocolate on Valentines Day. If they make it themselves, it's like saying that guy is the only one for them.

(4) White Day is the day when boys return that affection with a gift of their own (one month after V-day, on March 14th).