Useless Notes: Oh yes, FINALLY an IchigoRukia fic from crazyarsonist! About time, huh?

Disclaimer: Not mine. My imagination's not that pretty.


On the Phone with Rukia


Yeah, it's me. Turns out the project's gonna take longer than expected- yeah. Which means I'll probably have to stay over at Chad's for the night.

Don't give me that crap! I don't care if you and Inoue finished it before we did and- hey! Being a Substitute Shinigami takes a lotta my time, didn't you know!

Easy for you to say, you're not a Substitute Shinigami, are you? Well yeah, you help me out with all those Hollows, but-

Well, SO-RREE Chad and I didn't do it last week! We had summer, remember?! Yeah Rukia, summer. It's where we have to catch up for all those past lessons we missed 'cause we were out KICKING HOLLOW BUTT!

What do you mean 'calm down'? I AM calmed down! I'm just raising my voice-

Oh yeah, I forgot. You don't know anything on the real world, do ya? Well seems to me that you don't know anything Rukia; real world or not. HA. How's that for-

Sure, tell Renji and Byakuya for all I care! The hell can they do to me? I beat their asses before, didn't I?

Who's getting cocky?


But it's true! I did kick their-

Oh yeah right, you're not actually going to-

RUKIA! I'm warning you! Don't you dare tell Kenpachi or I swear I-

Okay, okay fine. I'm calm. Yeah.

So back to where we started, tell 'em that I'll be staying over at Chad's house for the night to finish the project and-

NO, of course Chad doesn't have a sister! The hell did you get that?!

Well go ahead, kick his ass for me.

Geez, stupid Dad… Of all the-

Yeah, still here. Yeah.

Make sure the door's locked in tight. Those three can really eavesdrop on people when they want to.

Locked already? You sure? How 'bout Kon? He all locked up too?

Okay, good.

So where was I? Oh yeah, the project. Well yeah, I guess that's it. Yeah. I'm staying over at Chad's for the night.


Geez, I swear. I'm only gone for one night and look at what happens…

What do you mean you're inviting the others? NO DAMMIT! You're the only shinigami allowed in there, you hear me?! I don't care if they're on a mission or anything, but-

Well of course, including me, but-

Rukia, I'm sure Renji's got nice quarters over there at Urahara-san's. Yeah. Sure he's a freeloader, but I'm sure they treat him well over there. Yeah. Which is why he is NOT, I repeat, NOT to stay over there at my room tonight. You understand, Rukia? He's not supposed to-

Jealous? Who're you calling jealous?! Aa?! That better not be me you're talking about, Rukia or I swear I'm really gonna give it to ya when I get back.

Well anyway…

The hell were you and Inoue able to finish the project that fast? I mean, we were all on the same mission and everything-

Oh yeah. Tatsuki, huh. Dammit, I shoulda known. Man, I forgot we could get grouped in threes…

Yeah. Ishida's with us too, but he did all the research for this one. Chad and I are only putting it together. Well of course, I'm not giving him a hard time with this! And it's not ugly or anything either. It's gonna kick some serious ass once sensei sees it. Yeah Rukia, even better than yours. HA. Too much for your ego, huh?

Not that I'm putting Inoue or Tatsuki down or anything, but-

OI! Don't do that the next time we argue, you get me?!

What do you mean I talk too much?! Speak for yourself, baka! Don't use that tone with me, Rukia.

And what do you mean I sound like Byakuya?!

I can call him whatever the damn hell I want Rukia. You want me to call him 'nii-sama' too?

Oh I see. Geez Rukia, if you wanted me for a brother that badly, you coulda just-


What are you talking about? I can so make a better brother than that red-haired tattooed freak and-

Okay, okay, geez, I'm sorry already, okay?

Yes Rukia, I know he'll be more of a brother than I'll ever be.

Yes Rukia, so does Byakuya.

Okay. Byakuya-sama. That better for ya?

Dammit Rukia…

Yeah, I'm fine.

Yeah man, I'm sorry too.

I said I'm sorry. What, you can't hear? What?

Okay. I'M SO-

The hell are you laughing for?

Yeah? So what if this is the first time you heard me apologize? What, can't a man say sorry too?

Yeah Rukia, sure.

No, no. I'm fine, really.

Sigh. Man, I'm really beat with this stupid project.

Chad? He's fine. Yeah sure, I'll tell him you said hi. He's out buying dinner.

What? Oh. Noodles. Yeah.

What about you? You finished eating?

Yeah? What'd Yuzu cook?

Smoked crab? You serious?! Man, Yuzu always cooks the fancy stuff whenever I'm outta the house.

Yeah, tell her to make smoked crab tomorrow evening. Man, I'm getting hungry… The hell happened to Chad?

Oh, there he is!

Oi Rukia, hold on for a minute, okay?

Okay. Yeah. Hold on a minute, will ya?


Yeah, let's just finish up the details first before eating! Yeah! Oh and Rukia says hi!

Yeah, okay!

Oi Rukia, you still there?

Yeah, Chad says hi too.

No, no it's okay. I can stay up on the phone with you if you want. No man, you're not eating up my time. I was the one who called, remember?


You? Oh okay.

No, I'm not going to sleep yet. We're still gonna finish up the details, have some dinner, play some video games and then-

What are you talking about? Of course we still make time for video games! It's how we, you know, bond. Yeah. Male bonding.

So yeah…

Yeah, just a minute!

Chad says I really gotta go. Yeah. Our grade's on the line here. Plus Ishida'd be right on my ass if we screw this one up.

Yeah Rukia, my ass; not Chad's. Man, I swear, that guy has some issues to-

Yeah, I'll be right there!

Yeah. Well…

Yeah Rukia, goodnight.

You get any spiritual activity on your end, don't hesitate to call okay? Yeah. Chad and I will be there in no time…

What's that look for?!

No, no, it's Chad. He's giving me that look again, you know.

So yeah… Call if there's any trouble, yeah?

What do you mean there'll be more trouble with me around?!

So… goodnight, Rukia. Take care.


So what if I'm being overly affectionate tonight?! I'm not used to not having you around, you-

Aw crap.

I was not supposed to tell you that… What? Ah shaddap, Rukia!

Oh no Chad, not you too!

No, it's nothing.


Goodnight Rukia. See ya tomorrow.


A/N: Sigh. I try to do an IchigoRukia story and I still had to put in a little bit of Renji… Sigh. Well in any case, thanks for reading! (Oh yeah, sorry it didn't turn out to be as sappy and romantic as my other RenjiRukia stories!)