note: So to take a break from Glitzy Intrigue, I decided to do Ringtailer720's "The Slightly Risqué Challenge" Challenge. I hope I do it justice and you all enjoy. :D
This is on the strong T/light M for language and subject matter, so just be warned.
Don't own MSB.
the spirit of massachusetts
by, the ultimateSora
With senior year behind them, the gang decided to spend the summer doing all they could together. College would start in late August, but they would have to start getting their dorm and apartment stuff come July, so they decided June would be the blow off month. And the fact that they were all going to different schools also had the eight wanting to spend more time together.
Much to her surprise, Phoebe had been accepted to Boston College, her mother's alma mater. Arnold had offers from Arizona, Texas, and Stanford to swim for them, but he settled for Harvard, his parents telling him they would support him not going to a top swim team school if he went to an Ivy League. He chose Harvard because it was in Boston.
Carlos got a wrestling scholarship to the University of Nebraska, Ralphie telling him the "N" on their football team's helmets stood for "Knowledge". It took Carlos about a day to get what he was saying, which resulted in a bruised lump on Ralphie's arm where he punched him. Ralphie also got a scholarship, a hockey one, to play for the University of Michigan Wolverines.
Wanda was accepted to the University of Florida. It had been one of her random choices, and Florida appealed to her because "it was the home of Miami". What she didn't know was that Gainesville, Florida was in the north central portion of the state, not on the coast and far from Miami. Her choices had been Florida and USC, and she chose Florida because it was close enough to Rhode Island and still tropical.
Like Arnold, Dorothy Ann was going to an Ivy League, but she was off to Penn in Philadelphia. She liked the sound of their pre-law program, and Pennsylvania was close to home, but far enough away where she could have her independence, something she hardly had growing up with four sisters.
Tim was staying in Rhode Island, going to the Rhode Island School of Design in Providence, but he didn't mind staying. RISD was one of the best art schools in the nation, and he had Arnold, Phoebe, and D.A. close by. Keesha would be fairly close at the University of Maryland in College Park, Maryland. The Franklins were all huge Terrapin fans, having been from Baltimore.
The gang decided to take a little trip, just the eight of them, and Arnold suggested his grandparents' beach home on Martha's Vineyard. The guys rode in Arnold's Toyota 4Runner, as the girls rode in Wanda's Range Rover. The house was in Tisbury, Massachusetts, right on the northern part of Martha's Vineyard.
When the eight arrived on the Vineyard, after taking the Vineyard Haven-Woods Hole ferry from the mainland of Massachusetts, the guys took all the luggage in the house as the girls set up a campfire on the beach. Tim brought his acoustic guitar out as the eight sat around the fire, Phoebe leaning against Arnold as he put his arms around her.
Tim began to strum the tune to Joe Cocker's "With A Little Help From My Friends", and the other seven listened as he sang in a smooth, yet gruff tenor. At the end of the song, Wanda started to laugh at something she had been thinking.
"The Friz went to Woodstock," she said. "It doesn't matter how old she was, she could have used the bus to go back!" As an afterthought, she said, "And I bet she was on acid...or crack...or some other mind-altering drug."
Keesha shook her head and chuckled. "You're such a dumbass."
Dorothy Ann reached beside her to pat Ralphie's thigh. "Well, that image is better than seeing a drunken Ralphie sing and butcher songs from Disney movies."
Ralphie's face turned red as he pulled a laughing D.A. into a gentle headlock across his lap. "One time!" he said, giving her a soft noogie. "I did that one time!"
Everyone turned when they heard Phoebe giggle, and they saw Arnold nibbling and sucking some on her neck. Keesha shook her head. "You two really do go at anywhere, huh?"
Carlos laughed. "How many licks does it take to get to the center--"
Arnold shot him a look. "Shut. Up."
Phoebe kissed his cheek to keep him calm, and she said, "How 'bout we make some s'mores?"
Ralphie picked up the Wal-Mart bag behind him, and he tossed everyone their own giant Hershey bars, box of graham crackers, and bags of marshmallows. Everyone also had their own sticks to roast the marshmallows, but Wanda was having too much fun playing with a spatula she found in the beer cooler.
"Wanda, what are you playing with now?" Keesha asked.
"Thing I found."
D.A. was about to say something, but Keesha held up a hand, saying, "No one understands the subtleties of Wanda's retardation better than me." She turned to Wanda. "Well, Wanda, how about you stop playing with the spatula now. I think Arnold and Phoebe used it for a sex toy."
Wanda was still digging into the sand with it. "No, they didn't. Phoebe can't even stand lube. Remember when she was whining about it."
Phoebe's face turned red. "No, I didn't. All I said was--"
Wanda furrowed her brow and pointed the spatula at Phoebe, "Say anything and I'll rip out your intestines with this spatula. I don't like being corrected!"
Phoebe turned to Arnold, confused, and asked, "Aren't I the moody and depressed one?"
He smiled and kissed her neck. "My moody and depressed one."
Carlos was the first to bite into his s'more. "It tastes like cat. Chocolate-covered--" He saw Wanda about to eat a s'more she dropped on the ground. "Wanda, don't eat it!"
Ralphie sniffed the chocolate bar. "Smells like something pissed on it."
Tim raised his brows. "Was it that old cat your mom refuses to put down?"
Ralphie threw the bar. "Shit, that damn cat pissed on the Wal-Mart bag!"
Everyone groaned and threw their s'mores. Keesha clapped her hands. "What say we tell some ghost stories?"
Wanda raised her hand. "The scariest thing I ever saw was Ms. Frizzle and Mr. Seedplot going at it in the teacher's lounge after that field trip to Terese's old school."
Phoebe's eyes widened. "No!"
Wanda nodded. "I wouldn't lie about seeing the Friz's rack." She put her hands on her breasts. "Almost as good as mine."
Phoebe got to her feet. "That's a lie, Wanda, and you know it!"
She ran inside of the house, and Wanda called after her, "I wouldn't lie about my ta-ta's!"
Arnold got up and ran after Phoebe. Carlos turned to Wanda. "You seriously saw the Friz's tits?"
"I wouldn't lie about that," Wanda said.
Inside the house, Arnold found Phoebe in the master bedroom, the room they were sharing. She was laying on the King sized bed, her back to him, and he walked around the bed to sit beside her. He put a hand on Phoebe's shoulder, and she looked up at him with bloodshot eyes.
"Sorry," she said.
"That I let the disturbing image of Mr. Seedplot with another woman get to me."
Arnold grinned. "Phoebe, he was your fantasy crush. It's understandable." His smile was gone. "Wait...that's all he was, right?"
Phoebe sat up and wiped her eyes. "Of course."
They kissed, and Arnold chuckled. "I was just thinking of Ms. Frizzle's PortaShrinker." He made his hand look like a gun. "Think about the kinky places we could make out in using this PortaShrinker I stole from her."
Phoebe giggled, and she cupped his face, pressing her lips to his. Phoebe pulled him down on top of her, and she started to unbutton his polo. Arnold pulled back to slip his shirt off, and one look at his bare chest had Phoebe tearing at her own clothes. Their lips met again, their teeth clanging, as Arnold reached for a condom out of the bedside table.
Arnold and Phoebe smoothed down their clothes as they walked down the stairs about half an hour later. They saw the other six were in the living room watching the flatscreen, and Phoebe flinched at Wanda yelled out, "Fuck the censors! I say we do what we want! Why is humanity so dumb?"
"What's going on?" Phoebe asked.
Keesha scoffed. "Wanda's trying to be 'political' to show she's smart."
Ralphie raised his brows. "Hey, Pheebs, when did you get that tattoo on your butt?"
Phoebe's face turned red. "What tattoo?"
Carlos started to laugh. "If I had been drinking milk I would have spurted milk out of my nose! Your blinds were open! We saw you two doing it!"
Arnold smirked. "Liked what you saw of my crotch, Carlos?"
Carlos got up. "Hey, man, I'm still hung like a horse. So..." He grabbed his crotch. "Suck on that!"
"And if by 'horse', you mean 'gnat', then yes," Keesha said. "Carlos, we all saw your ding dong when you guys went streaking."
D.A. turned to Arnold and Phoebe. "But seriously, close your blinds."
"I'm still curious about the tattoo, Pheebs," Ralphie said, crossing his arms.
Phoebe blushed, and Arnold laughed when he realized what they must have seen. "It's a bruise from when she fell off of me last week. Her butt landed on the door knob."
"How--" D.A. began, but Keesha held up a hand, shaking her head.
They all flinched when Tim yelled out a sudden, "That's it! I've had it with these phone calls!" Everyone looked at him. "Sorry, Sprint keeps spamming my phone with useless calls." He clapped his hands together. "So what now?"
Ralphie shrugged. "Arn brought his Xbox 360. How 'bout some Rock Band?"
The guys set up the game, and the first round had Arnold playing guitar on expert, Wanda's bass on hard, D.A.'s drums on medium, and Tim singing. They rocked out to 's "Bang a Gong (Get it On)". The next round was Arnold singing, Phoebe playing guitar on easy, Carlos on drums on hard, and Wanda still on bass, refusing to give it up. They rocked out to Weezer's "Buddy Holly".
The guys went next, Arnold on guitar, Tim singing, Ralphie on bass, and Carlos on drums, and then the girls were next, Phoebe on guitar, Wanda bass, D.A. singing, and Keesha on drums. They played Rock Band until about three o'clock when they all passed out from beer and lack of sleep in the living room.
note: Just some references to note:
"No one understands the subtleties of Wanda's retardation better than me."
- Taken from It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia. Mac says this about Charlie's "retardation".
The title is taken from a Family Guy parody of a 1980's Massachusetts tourism ad: "The spirit of Massachusetts is the spirit of America, the spirit of what's old and what's new. The spirit of Massachusetts is the spirit of America, the spirit of the red white and blue."