So sorry for the lack of updates. I've been having massive writer's block. I couldn't even write a sentence until this week. I have no idea why. I just felt dry and uninspired. Okay, time for a long list of thank yous, so here goes:
simplet77 (she was with her boyfriend before she finds the letter. Hermione had gone back in time to stop herself from writing it so she could properly break Bellatrix's heart. Hope that clears it up.)
Storylover (haha, wow, this review made me notice that it's been a month since I updated! omg, I feel horrible...)
CustomHeroine (I did toy with Bella being good, but she's just not like that. It would be out of character. Well, I can't give away a lot but Bella will meet Hermione in her own timeline. It won't be fun for either of them.)
Drackner Clawrus (Why thank you. I noticed there weren't many of them.)
Once again: I'm so sorry for not updating for a month. I've been bad!!
Chapter 9 - The Unraveling
My mind raced as I fondled the wand in between my palms, the thick ivy rapt against my skin. Slowly, I turned my head around. He was enjoying ever second of her mouth around him. I narrowed my eyes and turned my heel. Yes, this was it. This was the prefect way of ending this, wasn't it?
I cast the counter spell and allowed myself to be seen with tears streaming down my cheeks. Bellatrix hadn't noticed me, but he did. His dark eyes were wide when he met mine. "Oh bloody hell," he shouted. "Go away! Can't you see we're busy?"
I was so angry with everything that I didn't think clearly of this new plan. "Bellatrix, how could you?" I shouted. Sure enough, the thin face of Bellatrix Black met me. Her eyes were on fire, filled with shame and excitement at the same time.
"How could I what? Give my boyfriend some pleasure?" she mocked.
She was acting cool in front of him. He obviously didn't know about me and her. He didn't know about her bisexual tendencies. He had no clue whatsoever. Rodolphus looked at me and then at his girlfriend. "What is she going on about?" he asked. Bellatrix's dark eyes seemed to laugh.
"There's a lot about me you don't know," she said.
"There's a lot about you I don't care to know," he said. Slowly, he started to button up his pants. He walked away and grumbled something about how girls are so 'bloody confusing'. My eyes were hot and stinging from the tears. "How could you do this to me?" I asked her once more.
"You knew damn well I was with him when I started to fuck you," she said. Her eyes were filled with little emotion as she walked closer to me. I felt her hand grasp the back of my head. She was pulling me into her. The kiss was different from before and I felt sick having her lips touch mine.
She just had her lips wrapped around Rodolphus. I pulled away and narrowed my eyes. "How dare you kiss me after you had your mouth on him?!"
"How dare I?" she laughed. "You are mine. Did you forget that?" she hissed. I felt her push me up against the wall. I was pinned to the cold stone. Bellatrix's body was just as frigid. I put my hands on her shoulders; I was trying with all my might to push her back but to no avail. She was much stronger than I.
"I am my own person Bellatrix," I said. This only made her press her lips tightly around my neck. Her bite was cruel. Her bitter tongue lashed out and licked the nape of my neck. I felt my body tense at her advances. What was she going to do to me? How was I going to break this off? I needed to anger her!
"Bellatrix, stop!" I screamed.
"Stop your screaming! You want Rodolphus to come back here?" she hissed. I felt her knee pin me to the wall. It began it's ascent up my thigh and pressed up between my legs. I was sore, the pain shot up. To her, I had just had sex with her earlier in the day, to me, if felt almost like only two minutes ago.
While I knew this wasn't true, this only made me wonder what all this time traveling was doing to me. "Stop!" I yelled once more. I found strength and pushed her but she came back to me. She threw me against the wall.
"I love you!" she said.
"You have a sick way of showing it!" I protested. The more I fought, the more turned on I saw she was getting. I was her prey. She was just setting me up for the kill. This time, it wasn't about me, she wanted me for herself. This was power, lust, and maybe in her head, love. Was this really her way of telling me she loved me?
"I do love you! I love you so much! I can't lose you to him. I want you," she said in one breathless sigh. Her mouth was kissing my neck. They were hard kisses. Her long nailed hands grasped me by my arms. I knew that I was going to bruise there.
"I—" I couldn't get the words out. Her mouth was on mine once more. Her hands were now tugging up my shirt. My breast was met with the cold air of the hallway. Her hand clasped around my nipple and started to massage it. My head cocked back, I couldn't help it. It felt amazing.
My body was betraying me. I was pushing myself into her. I felt her knee against my sex and all I wanted was for her to touch me. What was I even thinking? Her massaging became rougher. Her mouth was now on my other breast. She was dragging my nipple into her mouth. Her teeth clamped around it sending a mix signal of pain and pleasure to my brain.
I was dizzy, lifeless. Was this torture or was it pleasure? "Bella," my mouth moaned. I had to hurt her, but my body wasn't allowing my mind to do what it needed to do. Suddenly, my mind flashed images of Ginny. Her sweet innocent smile, her hand climbing up my thigh and her eyes on my neck.
Was I going to receive that if I broke Bellatrix? And if I did break Bellatrix, what guarantee did I have that she wasn't going to kill me when she found the dirty mudblood that tricked her and broke her? None.
"I can't do this," I said. "I just can't anymore. I feel used! Stop!"
I pushed her off me. As much as I wanted to feel her curl up inside me, I couldn't allow her to. "What are you going on about? Don't you love me?" she asked. She was hurt, just like she was when she had read my letter. This was going to be hard. How was I ever going to do this?
"You're only obsessed with me," I said. Her eyes pierced into my very soul. She thrust me against the wall again.
"I'm not obsessed with you! I just love you! You can't see that?" she asked. She was in a blind rage and right now I was starting to fear for my life. My hand grasped my wand tightly.
"You are," I said coldly. "Bellatrix, it's been fun, honestly, but now it's time for us to stop. I have to go and I don't want you following me. I think its better this way."
"I'm not letting you go anywhere," she said. "You were enjoying me a moment ago. You want me!" Her hard kiss came down on my lips again.
"No!" I screamed but her hands were already touching my breasts and moving under my skirt. I pushed her but she didn't move. Thrashing my body back and forth only made her attack on me worse. Her fingers pushed past my lips causing a surge a pain. I wasn't ready enough for her to do that. "STOP! You're hurting me!"
She didn't listen. She was consumed with having power over me. She wanted me to stay with her. Her hand dropped under her own skirt and I noticed her hand move to the rhythm of her other hand which was curled up inside of me. I fought her again and found that each time I did, the pain was worse.
She wasn't going to stop. My whole body was sore; my mind was clouded by fear. "Please stop!" Tears were forming at the corners of my eyes. I started to punch at her shoulders but this only fueled her. She began to pound into me harder and harder. I screamed in pain.
By the time she was done, I slipped down the wall. I was broken. My whole body was shaking; she was looking down on me. "Don't leave me. You will regret it."
"I'm not yours," I said with tears in my eyes. "I can't be yours. I'm going to leave!"
"Do it! Do it then! I don't need you! It was fun but I don't!" Her face was twisted in rage and insanity. She was starting to lose herself. I should have never done this. Why couldn't I just go back in time and stop myself from coming here! That was what I had wanted to do, but no, Dumbledore said not to. He said that time wasn't that easy. Was he even right?
"I am going to do it!" I yelled through my tears. Had I just been raped? I curled up against the wall. The time-turner was ticking loudly against my chest and the air felt colder all around me.
"This is far from over," she said. "If you leave me now, I'll just live my life with him." She looked down the hallway where he had left. Her eyes came back down on me. It only made me feel sick, used and abused. I looked away from her. I just couldn't hold her stare.
"Good," I sobbed. "Don't you go looking for me. You'll only find shadows and ghosts."
Bellatrix didn't say another word. Her eyes began to tear as she turned around. She then turned her head to look at me and it seemed like she was going to say something more, but she didn't.
This was my time to escape. I got up slowly and allowed her to walk away back into the common room. With tears in my eyes, I walked away from the scene. A few Slytherins passed me. They must have been wondering what was wrong with me. Or perhaps they didn't care. Perhaps they would just gossip about it later.
I didn't care. I just wanted to get back home. I wanted everything to be as it was. I wanted to get back to Ron, Harry and especially Ginny. My fingers traced the time-turner once I was away from students. With a deep breath, I clicked the dials. The world blurred around me making me rather dizzy.
I opened my eyes to see that I was standing right where I was in the past. I looked around nervously to see if there was anything to tell me what was going to happen, but there were no signs.
After what seemed like hours, I made my way to the common room. I had to calm down. If I was going to bump into anyone, I didn't want them to see me broken and crying. They would only ask what happened to me and I couldn't exactly tell them that Bellatrix Lestrange raped me in a hallway.
Slowly, I mouthed the password to the common room. I was relieved that it had not changed since the last time but at the same time, I was afraid to see Harry acting like James again.
Inside, Ron rushed up to me. He placed his arms around me and held me in a hug. My face flushed. I was always the one to go to him, but this time, it was nice. I had to admit it. "Where have you been?" he asked me. "We've been going mad looking for you but Dumbledore said that you were just fixing a mistake!"
What was Ron talking about? Was I in the right time line?
"Ron, what are you talking about?" I asked him. His blue eyes blazed.
"Hermione, you've been gone over a month," he said. "Harry has been talking to Dumbledore about you missing. There's so much that we have done and Hermione, this is horrible but Umbridge is on her way to taking over the school."
"Is that Hermione?" I heard Harry ask. He came up behind me and also hugged me tightly. "It is you!"
"Guys, please," I said. "Have I really been gone that long?"
"Yes," Ginny said. Her eyes were clearer than I remember. She was grinning at me, beaming and it made my heart melt. I looked from Ron to Ginny. I couldn't believe what I was getting myself into. I couldn't believe I was feeling this way after what had just happened! There really must have been something wrong with me.
I had to keep my composure. They could never know. "Ginny!" I said. I ran to her and hugged her tightly. It was such a rush smelling her. I in took a breath of air and allowed her scent to travel through my nose and into my body.
"What were you doing?" Harry asked me. I broke the hug with Ginny. Her blue eyes smiled at me. I took a deep breath and turned to Harry. His green eyes were filled with concern.
"Harry, I can't really tell you," I said. "Let's just say I played with time again and this time I made a right mess. Has anyone got the paper for today? I need to check something."
"Sure," Ginny said. She handed me the paper and sure enough on the front page was Bellatrix. She was in Azakaban and had broken out. Her husband was Lestrange and she was a follower of Voldermort. I sighed a breath of relief but deep down inside I was wondering how upset she was at me.
I was wondering what was going to happen when we met. I had to hold my breath for a moment but Ron knew me too well. "Hermione," he asked. "What's wrong?"
I looked up to him and said, "Nothing Ron. It's just that I wanted to make sure that everything is how it should be."
He nodded his head. He bought it. Harry hugged me again. "Please don't do that to us again," he said. "I needed you and I still need you. The meetings Hermione, they are more important than ever."
"I know Harry," I said as I hugged him back. He was like a brother to me and his care for me meant more than he would ever know. "I'm going to go rest. It's been a long night." I turned around and walked off to the girl's dorm.
Lucky for me, there were no girls inside. Most of them were in the common room gawking at me. I knew there would be gossip but I honestly didn't care. I threw myself on my bed. It was just so good to be back in my own time with my own friends. Everything was as it should be but I was worried about Dumbledore. There was something Harry wasn't telling me.
Lost in my own thoughts, I hadn't heard the door open. I hadn't felt another body climb into bed with me. I didn't feel the soft breath until my name was whispered into my ear. I turned around to see Ginny looming over me.
"Hermione?" she whispered.
"Ginny? You scared me," I said.
"Sorry," she blushed. "Are you sure you are alright? You look shaken. What happened?"
"Nothing happened Ginny," I lied. I forced to smile. I was trying so hard not to think about what had happened in the hallway. I didn't want to think about the girl I had. I was here with the girl I wanted.
"If you want to talk, please talk to me," she said slowly. She then held me in her arms and lay down beside me. My heart raced. There was something so peaceful about this. I was lost in her scent, lost in her warmness. I closed my eyes slowly. This was the calm after the storm.
"I will Ginny," I said. "But right now, I just want to sleep. Thank you for being there for me."
My voice was shaking, it was weak. Ginny wasn't used to hearing me like this, it was something I could hear in her voice.
"I'm always going to be here for you Hermione," she said. There it was. She knew this wasn't me. She held me closer and said, "Close your eyes and rest."
I did as she said and drifted to sleep in her arms. I would worry about Bellatrix, Umbridge and everything else in the morning.