Standard Disclaimer

When ya get started into this you'll see that its not the more original concept and its been done before. But 'I' never did one before and I always wanted to so…I'm doing it for the fun factor. Hope you enjoy it too.


It Can't Get Worse

Chapter 1

Head foggy, eyes strained as they opened under that damnable soft white light of the overhead lamps at the hospital. Shinji didn't have to be told where he was, he'd been there enough to have the ceiling tiles memorized. "My favorite hospital room," he muttered and pulled at the blanket. What had done it this time, another of the great Ritsuko Akagi's patent pending mind fucks, that's what.

'We just have to have both of you in the plug again,' Shinji replayed the faux blond's words verbatim in his mind. 'You were over 200% together, we have to see if it can happen again.' While he hadn't minded the idea of being in a confined space with the lovely if not volatile German, why did it take the stupid bitch so long to have them do the test again?!

"Did I just think of Ritsuko as a stupid bitch?" the tired pilot asked aloud. He was feeling angrier than normal. But that was to be expected, two weeks ago he catches a giant falling bomb, and then he's thrown into an entry plug with a passionate girl with a superiority complex, who had her ego damaged by a certain boy who would remain spineless…nameless.

Closing her book, Rei took notice of her target waking up, "You have awakened Ikari-kun?" His eyes were open and he was muttering, but Rei wasn't one to make leaps of faith, she had no faith. Being a biologically engineered clone and being reminded of her replacability didn't give the poor child much to believe in. But she did have one annoying soft spot, a boy named Ikari Shinji came into her life and with him came a new concept, friendship. Now however that was either to be threatened or at the least changed. "If you are we have much to discuss."

Rubbing an odd film off his eyes, a silky film, Shinji crooked his head over towards the headache ensuing voice. "Ayanami-san, what are you doing here? Is it an angel?" This song and dance had played out before, him in bed with the enigmatic walking quandary meeting him when he woke up. Why don't I feel the same way when I look at her now…last time I saw her I was all queasy like with Asuka but now…

Setting her book down, more of a collection of rules she was forced to memorize, Rei was perplexed. Misato had instructed the girl to brief Shinji about what had occurred, while she dealt with the other half, but Rei wasn't sure how to do it. "I was ordered to brief you on the results of Akagi's test. But as I am unfamiliar with how to do so, I will just show you the result." Reaching for a small hand mirror on Shinji's nightstand, she handed it over. "As for your comment on Akagi, I would say it isn't without warrant."

As he reached out for the offering, had Shinji's mind been clearer he'd have noticed something strange. His arm was thinner, more refined and trimmed, more feminine. "Still I shouldn't call Akagi-san bad names just because I don't understand…what the…" Shinji's jaw went slack and his free hand started groping his face. "This can't be…it's a trick, special effects or a trick mirror." He was staring into the eyes of one Asuka Langley Soryu.

"I can assure you that no duplicitous intentions are at work," Rei stood up and took the mirror from Shinji's shaking hands less she hurt herself. "Magi confirmed that twenty minutes into the test pilot Soryu and your sync ratio exceeded 300% and which point the two of you screamed and passed out." From her station in Unit-00 Rei was tempted to liberate her only friend, sure it might have caused Asuka to get crushed but no big loss there. "The affects of the high level of synchronization was not learned until Pilot Soryu awoke an hour ago. His reaction was…drastic."

Three male nurses had to subdue the newly awoken boy and dope him up to considerable levels of artificial happy. Misato ordered shackles on the arms for when Asuka woke again so he wouldn't threaten to throw himself off a roof if something wasn't done and done thirty seconds ago.

Grabbing at the 'film' that just so happened to be her new cropping of red hair, Shinji's expression was an amalgam of horror, disgust, and disbelief, "Akagi can reverse it right? She's a genius so she of course is already going to reverse this right?" She had no illusions about things, if he was in Asuka's body and vice versa. Asuka would kill him if he ever got out of this bed and looked down.

Gathering a few articles of clothing, Rei placed them on Shinji's bed, her tiny frown was very telling for Shinji. "We just confirmed and eradicated what spiked the sync increase. Remnants of the computer AI angel infiltrated the system and the Eva's auto immune system was what officially caused the accident. As of right now there is no way to replicate the happenings."

"So I'm stuck like this!" Shinji drew her hand to her chest and accidentally cupped her own newly acquired breast. The stimulation was disastrously pleasant and a rosy hue adorned her cheeks, followed by shame as Rei's eyebrow rose a tiny degree. "I didn't mean to do that!" she shouted and pulled her still warm hand away. "Oh Kami-sama, this isn't happening."

Mystified, Rei was finding the new events more intriguing as she watched what was once an annoying creature acting differently, more pleasing to her pallet. Shinji's mind/personality in Asuka's body, Rei's subconscious saw infinite possibilities there. Pulling the blanket down, giving both of the girls a nice view of Asuka's body clad in a thin hospital gown, Rei spoke clearly, "You must get dressed. Major Katsuragi instructed me to bring you to her once you were briefed and calm."

Calm? How the hell anything could be considered CALM again! She…HE'D never be calm again! "Y-yeah, maybe she has something to tell me that is good. Like this is just some big alcohol fueled hysteria, brought on from me cooking with her booze on accident again." Swinging her legs over, Shinji couldn't help but feel weaker. While Asuka had proven a deft fighter, he had no skill like that, and she felt colder too, hospital gowns aren't known for having backs and the hospital A/C was dreadfully low. "What are you looking at Ayanami?" she quipped as Rei's gaze stopped meeting her eye to eye.

Watching Shinji's bodily reaction to the cold, Rei covered her own chest in response, "You should dress quickly, I will assist you as it is doubtful you have any skill at donning female attire." Regardless of what the rumors at Nerv said about him, Rei didn't think he was a closet homosexual, she'd noticed him watching her far too much for that, and if nothing else Rei was observant. Her gaze still mesmerized by the reaction Shinji had to the cold, Rei just nodded.

Finally catching on, Shinji yelped like the girl he now was, "STOP STARING AT ME PEVERT!" Covering her chest and the two pronounced protrusions, she cowered in the blanket until Rei apologized, then forcibly undressed/re-dressed her, only a small degree of inappropriate contact was made, but with her mind so frazzled it wasn't as if Shinji could enjoy it. Freshly clad in Asuka's school uniform, the female duo headed to the cafeteria where Misato instructed the walking talking stereotype for robots to bring the fledgling woman.


While Misato had been around the block more than one time, saw many strange and odd things, nothing prepared her for the shock she received after yet another blundered attempt from her college roommate. "Tell me again Ritsuko how we're supposed to deal with this?"

Sipping on coffee, her hand holding a donut, Ritsuko was the picture of ease. "It's nothing really that out of the ordinary, Misato. They'll just have to adapt to it until I can find a way to reverse it. Failing that, well…Asuka always more of a tomboy and Shinji is fairly feminine." Taking a big bite out of her chocolate frosted long john, Ritsuko couldn't have appeared less worried if she tried. "After some adjustment I'm sure everything will be fine."

"Asuka threatened to kill himself if this wasn't fixed by the time the drugs wore off!" Misato countered expertly. While she suspected Shinji had been stronger than he let on, Misato wouldn't have imagined that scrawny body capably of beating down two orderlies, but the scene from before proved that was the case. "And who knows how Shinji will react to this, I mean she's not the most stable of people."

Wiping the remaining sugery goodness off her lips and then licking it, Ritsuko shrugged. "I'm sorry Misato, but there is nothing else we CAN do but wait and try to reverse this." As time travel hadn't been invented yet, Ritsuko couldn't very well go back in time and worn herself about the last remnants of the angel lurking in the Magi. "We'll just have to be supportive of them, patient, and most important of all DON'T PLAY TRICKS on them!"

Her hand went up to offer a rebuttal, but Misato's brain couldn't come up with one, she had been thinking of how much more fun it would be to tease her surrogate son turned daughter. "I'll be good," she finally relented with sunken head and frown. "You're right this will be a tough adjustment for the two of them and they'll need us more than ever to deal with it."

"Major, I have brought Ikari-kun as instructed," Rei announced her arrival, holding tightly to Shinji's arm. "Shall I inquire to Soryu's status?" she asked as she led the bewildered Ikari to the table at which Misato sat. More than a couple of eyes from random Nerv employees fell on to the pair, it wasn't as if they didn't all know it already. Word spread like greased lightning around that place.

"Rei," Ritsuko started, "Why are you holding Shinji like that?" Far be it from Ritsuko to criticize female on female relations, she experimented in college as her friend could attest, but was it Rei had a thing for Shinji or Asuka or…her head hurt from the implications.

Taking a free seat at the table, Shinji bashfully ignored eye contact as she examined patterns in the mock wood tabletop. "I…can't walk very good right now. My balance is all off." She fell flat on her face three times before Rei insisted on helping to facilitate there progress. "Ayanami was making sure I didn't have anymore accidents." Hearing the half aborted snort/laugh from Misato, she set a baleful glare towards the purple haired woman.

Cutting Misato's laugh spree short, Ritsuko just nodded, "Your center of balance has shifted, just another one of the things you'll have to get used to…" Shinji's gaze shifted to her, and memories of Asuka spiked fear in the brilliant scientist. "Only until we fix things of course," she added quickly. Turning to Misato and seeing her friend still holding her mouth shut, periodically making spasms, she hoped the immature woman could keep it to herself. "Yes, Rei, go check on Asuka…make sure he's not to violent ok?"

A brief salute and head bob later, the perfect teenage soldier was off on her next mission leaving the confused and scared Shinji in the hands of Misato and Ritsuko. It could have been worse, though it could have been better.

Unable to look at the forlorn body that used to be the fiercest hellcat alive, Misato abruptly got up. "I'll get you something to eat, Shinji. I'm sure you could stand for something." And without waiting for a food request, Misato bolted so she could get her laugh out of her system. Her nerves were shot, her fears high, but seeing 'Asuka' clinging to Rei and then hearing about her inability to walk thanks to being top heavy now, Misato cracked under the stress.

Back at the table, Ritsuko was sending hate beams in Misato's general vicinity. "I'm sure Ayanami told you a lot about what happened. About the accident, the angel, and how we're going to work on a reversal." Taking her slow dropping head as a sign of acceptance she carried on, "Did you have any other questions about it right now that you have to have answered now?"

It was much to fast, everything was just happening at such a rapid pace. One day before he was having a semi-troubled life, he had friends, co-workers, a few girls he imagined courting, but now this. "Why did this have to happen?" her eyes stung mercilessly as the moisture gathered. "Why can't my life be normal?" The damn broke and the image once associated with unbreakable strength was crying heavily. "I didn't ask for any of this!"

Unused to comforting, Ritsuko brokenly embraced the crying teenager, "T-There there, Shinji. We'll fix it ok? Just try to be strong ok?" Holding Shinji, the troubled doctor scanned the cafeteria, sure enough more than half the room had its eyes on the pair, and no Misato in sight. "We-we'll be here for you, both of you, to help you get through this so…just calm down ok?"

Rubbing her eyes with the back of her hand, Shinji calmed herself down. Dabbing her eyes with a napkin Ritsuko had gotten for her hands, Shinji took several deep breaths. "Y-you're right Ritsuko-san. This is only temporary right…we'll be fine and as long as I don't upset Asuka everything should be fine."

Fine…Ritsuko had to wonder if that word had anything to do with the current situation. Didn't sound like it, how could anything be fine when two teenagers swap bodies! An insanely overprotective girl and a shy and self depreciative boy switched bodies, both of which were imperative for the survival of humanity had to deal with being the opposite sex. There wasn't a guidebook titled 'So now you're officially a boy/girl' that they could use, this was just plain old fashioned unknown territory. Ritsuko could only hope Asuka would take things better once she woke up.


Lying in his bed, Asuka stared up at the boring ceiling, seeing through the mundane and into the realm of psychopathic killers. Oh yes, somebody was going to die, a painful and miserable death. There simply wasn't any other alternative than murder for the outrage bestowed upon her. Forced into the body of her rival! And a BOY none the less! "But do I kill him or her?" While killing Shinji would be fun, a small part of her rebelled against that notion. Ritsuko, who was to blame, was the preferred target.

As she had done with Shinji, Rei startled the half-sleeping mental visitor, "Murder would result in incarceration and the inability to pilot." And her sense of protectiveness over Shinji was still fully in sway. "Might I suggest you take another dose of your medication?" Rei had already removed the tip of the needle and moved towards the boy's arm.

Batting Rei's hand away, Asuka sat up. "No more drugs for me, I have to see straight and think straight. Just being in this…this…body," his hands gestured up and down the modest physique, "Makes me ill. And not being able to see what that pervert is doing with my luscious and pristine body makes me want to throttle something."

"Pilot Ikari is presently in the cafeteria with Dr Akagi and Major Katsuragi. I was told to bring you if you were in a malleable state of mind." Rei's eyes denoted none of the fascination she had over the change. The timid boy looked livid, anger unknown to his features sparked and Rei had to admit she hated it. It was unbecoming of the expectations she had. "Your clothing is on the chair."

Jumping off the bed in a hurry, Asuka fell back onto the bed, unaccustomed to the lower center of gravity, he was having issues walking much as Shinji had. "Damn it! This clumsy body is infecting my mind!" Yes it had to be the body's fault as Asuka would have never made such a silly thing…he told himself anyway. "And what are you staring at!" Asuka hollered back at the albino viewing gallery.

The faintest hint of a blush was adorning the pallid cheeks of one Ayanami Rei. "Your gown is open in the back," and Rei was given a very up close and personal view of a firm behind. "If you wish to respect Ikari-kun's physical privacy you might consider tact in future actions, which is if you wish her to do the same."

"DAMN IT!" the confused boy raged and clutched the back of his gown closed, shutting down the free show. "Get out of here wonder girl…NOW!" It was going to be embarrassing enough dressing without wonder pervert talking about his ass. Once he heard the door close, he took several long and calming breaths. "Ok…I can do this. I dissected human bodies before in collage and this shouldn't be much more disgusting than that."

Adjusting far more quickly than Shinji had, Asuka gathered up his cloths and tossed them on the bed. "Guess he does have a decent sense of taste for a boy," he muttered as he looked at the button up white shirt and slacks. "Ok…on three. One-two-three…" all but ripping the gown over his head, Asuka chucked the tattered remains at the far wall and closed his eyes. "Shirt first," he said with a solemn oath to NOT look down for any reason.

A simple task, he put the shirt on and buttoned it up by feel, ignoring the surprisingly strong chest and arms. Guess he wasn't such a wimp…or maybe all men are just stronger. Next came the boxers… "Fuck those…not touching anything like that." The first mistake was made, not that the up until today German had any knowledge of that. Using part of the destroyed gown, he grabbed the offending undergarments and tossed them in the garbage. "Have to hurry or that Idiot will violate my chastity."

Dropping the pants to the floor, Asuka stepped into them while keeping his chin perpendicular to the floor. Looping his fingers into the belt straps he pulled up the valiant defenders of his eyes, reached for the zipper and… "AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH! GAH! IT HURTS!" Zipped himself inside the zipper. Unable to take the pain and think straight he looked at the offending organ and at the now open door where Rei had reemerged with nothing resembling concern on her face.

"Is something wrong?" the dead pan child asked, had it been Shinji hearing her talk he would have detected the hint of sarcasm. Clearing the distance in a matter of seconds, Rei grabbed the offending tab and none-to-gently liberated the constrained body part. "You forgot a step, the undergarments are used to protect your genitals from such harm." Unfazed by the part of the anatomy Asuka was having trouble with, Rei grabbed it, tucked it down and zipped up the slacks. "If you are finished we are needed."

"You just…what that…aren't you…" Asuka couldn't comprehend that Rei had just grabbed Shinji's bait and tackle and put it back in the tackle box. The pain overrode any actual sensation from the pale girl, but the idea was still there. Thankfully for Rei, Asuka's frazzled mind shut down as he was lead to the cafeteria where Shinji was now contently eating a bowl of soup and a concerned Misato watched.


Sitting on the couch back in the shared domicile, Asuka and Shinji refused to even look at the other. To see themselves staring back at them was far too surreal. "This is serious bullshit Misato and you KNOW it!" Asuka yelled as the uncomfortable silence that had accompanied them the moment they met in the cafeteria, the car ride home, and finally an hour on the couch. "We can't be expected to live like this, I can't allow that pervert to continue to inhabit MY body!"

"What would you suggest Asuka, and mind your swear words," Misato rubbed the sweat coming down her cheek. It was just creepy to have a somber Asuka and highly agitated Shinji. "Put her in a drug induced coma until Ritsuko can find a way to reverse this? And what if she can't? What if you're stuck like that?"

Without a moments hesitation Asuka's response, "If she can't fix this I'm killing myself! Just watch me!" The expected response was given, both Shinji and Misato expected the hyperbole of suicide, and neither correctly suspected Asuka to do it. "I mean I'm stuck in this boring body and he…he's in my supreme one! How is this fair?"

A surge of hormones kicked into the trouble girl's body, "It's not like I asked for this Asuka! You could stop and think about MY feelings too couldn't you? My world is just as mixed up now as yours, but all you can do is think of what I'm going to do to YOUR body, what about MY body?" She had no idea where the courage to talk up came from, it wasn't natural for her to be this forward, this outspoken, but what she didn't now was it was all due to her new hormones.

Misato just watched as Asuka sat back down, a troubled crease in his brow. "I…yeah guess you might have a bit of a point." His temper oddly dulled at the overflow of emotion from the girl next to him. "Just don't think I'll not be keeping an eye on you to make sure you don't take advantage of your blessing."

Her eyes, widened at the shock of Asuka calming down after Shinji's tiny tirade, settled as she opened her beer. Misato let out a healthy belch before she officially went into briefing mode. "As the two of you are aware, you've been asleep for the past two day's, more or less. During that time, Ritsuko examined the two of you and aside from the obvious mental issue, you're both perfectly healthy." Taking a deep sip of her beer, she expected some sort of rebuttal, when none came she continued. "As we don't know how long this will last, we've informed your school as to the change. No hiding of this will happen. What good would it do, neither of you could really act like the other anyway."

"Asuka would kill Touji and Kensuke if she tried," Shinji snickered at the mental image. She could see it clearly, Touji talking about whatever idol he wanted to sleep with and Asuka's instant divine fist on the back of his head. Or Kensuke's image gallery of Asuka on this computer would result in an immediate breakdown. And she had to admit she'd fair no better talking about 'girly' things with Hikari.

But while Shinji was accepting, Asuka wasn't to keen on the idea, "You're going to kill my social life! Every two-bit idiot boy will be hitting on me…him…her…YOU KNOW!" Asuka forked his thumb at his ex-body. While inhabiting the old body, Asuka had shot down the hopes and dreams of many potential suitors, now they'd all think they could have another go with a different personality behind the mental wheel.

"Shinji, you might want to take a bath now, Asuka and I are going to have a little chat," Misato was hoping that thanks to the college degree Asuka wouldn't have taken this so hard, hell Shinji (despite her depression on the matter) had accepted it and just hoped for a quick reversal.

Quick to object, Asuka grabbed Shinji's shoulder painfully hard and forced her to sit back down. "Like hell he…she will! That's my body and I won' t have him manhandling it!" Forgetting his newfound strength Asuka continued to squeeze and force. That is until Misato jumped up and threw him off Shinji. "What was that for!?"

"Look at what you were doing Asuka!" Misato tended to the wincing and red-eyed Asuka. Helping the poor girl up, Misato lead her to the bathroom door, "In case you've forgotten men are physically stronger and women more sensitive to pain! You were about to break your own body's collarbone without thinking about it!"

Momentarily stunned at his actions Asuka sat down as Misato soothed the sniffling Shinji and shooed him into the bathroom. While she hadn't liked to accept it, he was well aware that physical pain was something he had come to hate, but he had no idea of the drastic change in strength a male had. He'd have to remember that, both while in Shinji's body and when eventually back in her own. If I hurt him so easily just now…what could he have done to me after all I've put him through?

The answer was a lot. Still having the advantage of knowing martial arts would put Asuka on the winning side if an actual fight broke out. Give Shinji the advantage of a surprise attack and Asuka would be down before she could have put up a defense.

"Now what do you have to say for yourself you la-man?" Misato corrected mid-stride. This was going to take a lot of getting used to. Disciplining the boy that had for lack of better words taken care of her up till now. "I expected more from you, the perfect and mature Asuka Langley Soryu, taking his frustrations out on somebody suffering just as much if not more than you are."

Crossing his arms and looking out the patio window, "You're being unfair Misato. Why are you getting upset at me for? Shinji's the one that's taking things to far? Crying like that and milking sympathy. You never saw me crying when I was hurt did you?" He never would have let people see him week, had to keep up the mask of strength.

Reminded that she wasn't dealing with adults, she was dealing with scared teenagers, Misato altered tactics. Sliding from the chair to the couch, Misato draped an arm around Asuka's shoulders supportively. "I guess you're right Asuka, I have been a little one sided here. I guess I always expect you to be more mature because you graduated college already and all but demand respect. And my time with Shinji has led me to know he's more delicate than he seems. I'll try to be fairer with you if you promise to try and take it easier on her. Both of you are going to have a lot of adjustments to make until this gets fixed."

He wanted to object, to get angry at Misato's sudden shift from official mode to babying him and pampering him but he couldn't. He was mollified, Misato's warmth, her scent, her luscious breasts oh so close to his face. A brief mental image of him smothering his face between those ample pillows flooded his mind and for the first time since he woke up felt something stir. "Oh my god…oh my god…OH MY GOD!! MAKE IT STOP!" Asuka screamed as his manhood pressed painfully against the inside of his jeans.

"Asuka what's wrong?" Misato asked genuinely spooked by the complete 180 Asuka just underwent. For a moment Misato thought the two were bonding, a stark contrast to the usual simply living together they had done. Misato was always better at getting along with the boys. She hadn't expected the newness of Asuka's male body to have confounded her so much. "Tell me what is wrong Asuka and I'll try to help," grabbing the panicking boy by the shoulders, keeping him close, Misato was just adding fuel to the fire.

Harder and harder it pressed, the injury from earlier in the day all the more apparent, Asuka wanted to die. "It…it's nothing…just um…had a small break is all. I'm all better now, but I think I'll have a lie down?" He had to get away from that evilly sexy Misato! Oh how he had never really appreciated just how wonderful a body Misato had. Before it was a thing of jealousy, now her cursed body wanted nothing more than to grab hold of that flowing mane of hair and pull her in for some heated petting. "Just uh…get me when supper is ready ok?"

Her hand trailing after the boy as he all but ran to his old room, Misato stood agape. Just what was going on here, she hadn't the foggiest. She did know that this was going to be the norm until the two got more accustomed to things. Hell, was such a thing even possible for them? In a few days maybe things will calm down, I have to hope for that. Unbloody likely, but ignorance was bliss.

"M-Misato?" Shinji's nervous voice called out from behind the bathroom door.

Sucking up a torrent of air, Misato headed to troubled teen number two. "What is it Shinji?"

More fumbling could be heard on the other side of the door, a tiny crash and a heavy sigh. "I don't know how to…to take this stuff off? Rei went so fast this morning and I was…am so confused by it all…" Another pitiful sigh escaped her lips.

And the headache official started at that moment, as Misato opened the door to find the trembling Shinji still fully clad in school attire with a worried look on her face. "Just this once Shinji, you have to learn this and learn it fast ok? And make this quick, Asuka's off in his room taking a cool down and I think he's forgotten I sent you in here." Whatever spooked him, it happened at the best time if Shinji acted fast enough that is.

She did, and thanking the gods, Misato had a peaceful evening as both children sequestered themselves to there rooms to let everything sink in. Sure Asuka let out a few more threats that if anything had changed on her body when she got it back, Shinji wouldn't be spared, and again setting Asuka and Misato agape Shinji threatened the same thing.


Eyes fluttering open, Asuka let out a powerful yawn. With no window in the bedroom, a nightstand light was flicked on when the alarm for school rang. "Oh thank god…it was all just a horrible dream." Having her mind switched with Shinji's, getting painfully aroused by Misato, zipping up that annoying hunk of meat in the zipper. All of it.

"Yeah there is no way Misato could turn me on…not with her big breasts and those dark brown nipples of hers…hm…and the fact she actually shaves down there…" little did the boy realize was that his hand was slowly and totally without his actual want sliding down into the no-no zone. "I can picture her at the onsen now, how the water made her hair cling to her body like a sheet…"

For roughly ten seconds Asuka's sleep deprived and overly stressed mind continued to fantasize about his guardian. His hand under no actual central control found a happy little friend that was standing by the curbside that morning. 'Oh hello there Little Asuka how are you today?' the hand asked. Little Asuka's reply way 'I'm a little lonely how about you and I dance for awhile?' To which the hand joyously said, 'I thought you'd never ask, lets dance to Misato's fucking hot?' Little Asuka let Mr. Hand lead with a parting, 'I think I can get to like that song.'

Fast forward three seconds after initial contact.

"SHINJI!" Asuka screamed as he ran from her room, odd how the photos all the cute and muscular guys on the walls didn't make him all warm and fuzzy like before. "Open this door right now!" Asuka, sans pants and underwear, stood pounding on Shinji's door. "I said open this door right this second or I'll break it in!"

Things like tact, decorum, and sanity left the boy's mind as the hopeful dream came back to crashing reality. "That's it, I'm sure your doing something nasty in there!" Asuka opened the door and strode right in, flipping on the light as she did. Seeing a mound of potential flesh under the blanket, "Don't pretend to be sleeping, I have a serious issue here and YOU'RE going tell me how to deal with it!"

Very rudely woken from a very pleasant dream about fishing, Shinji groggily flung back the sheet and sat up. Rubbing the sleep from her eyes, "Wa is it Asuka, I still have twenty minutes before I have…to…cook." The words died in her lips as the scene before her came into full clarity.

Asuka was standing at the foot of her bed, with just a shirt on, and his semi-inflated member in his hand. A very confused and misleading expression on his face lead the newly awakened female Shinji to grab the sheet and cover herself completely. "GET OUT OF HERE YOU PERVERT!"

"NO!" Asuka yelled back grabbing the sheet with his free hand. "You're going to tell me how to get this demon thing to go back down! And you're going to do it NOW!" It burned his hand with how hot the damnable thing was! How could men go on with this stupid divining rod going off every other second!

Peeking out from over the covers, "Just stop…touching it ok? It goes down on its own if you leave it alone." Speaking from experience, Shinji didn't exactly like watching Asuka squeezing what had once been hers. "It gets that way in the morning, sex ed said it was to keep the blood flow going so it doesn't die off." Or something like that, Shinji never had known to well why he had morning wood, just that it was an annoyance he had to occasionally hide from Asuka.

Ripping off the blanket and throwing it to the ground, Asuka wasn't buying it. The previous day the stupid thing stood up when Misato was flaunting her delicious body, and this morning it was thinking about it that got the infernal rod all randy. How the hell did he hide this thing too! Stupid thing sticks out about half a foot! Pushing Shinji to the bed, never minding his manhood was dangerously close to touching her. "You'll tell me how to control this thing or so help me I'll…"

Drawing her hands up to her chest, Shinji shoved at Asuka as she loomed preditoriously over her. "Stop it Asuka, or I'll scream for Misato!" It wouldn't have helped as Misato's response to the situation last night was to get so hammered she had dreams about nails. "Now just listen to me ok, stop thinking about it, or think of things you find unappealing."

"What do you think of," Asuka asked genuinely intrigued. Never having to have dealt with this type of situation before, he was all ears on how to stop it. Pulling off his former body, Asuka waited with baited breath for a way to make the thing in his hand stop being so damn hard. "And if you say me I'll belt you right here," never one to not give mixed signals Asuka was in rare form.

Gazing around the room, trying to keep the panic that was brewing deep within her from overwhelming her mind, Shinji blurted out the first thing that to mind. "Ice, ice water, cold things, my father, just about anything that repulses me. That usually does the trick." Well it did when she used to have the problem.

Closing his eyes, she tried exactly what Shinji said. Slowly, agonizingly slow, the blasted thing started to soften, and shrink, and finally went back to normal. "Oh thank god for that…this is going to be hell on earth for me. You're stupid body responds to just about EVERYTHING!" Case in point, due to his manhandling of his ex-body, the shirt Shinji had slept in had opened exposing her budding chest to the former occupant… "OH NOT AGAIN!"

Yes, he was aroused by his own old body.

By this time Misato finally woke from all the screaming, a jackknife headache pounding away at her sanity. Walking into Shinji's room to find Asuka still with member in hand over the partially nude Shinji, simply grabbed Asuka and drug her out of the room. "Ritsuko better find something fast…or I'm going to kill Shinji's body."


Author notes.

Yeah it's the tried and true mind swap story. I always liked them but never wrote one. And I've usually wrote Asuka as being a side character or 'best friend' so I thought I'd try and give the German more of a staring role. Hope ya all enjoy this thing and continue to support me in my insane little ditties.

As for the novel, it's about 80% done!!!! Hoping to have it done soon and try and find somebody to give it a chance. Wish me luck

Ja Mata