Kasek: Inspired by Masta of the House's "Mafia". I wanted to see what I could do with such a prompt :3 Basically, the Naruto characters play the game 'Mafia'... or, in this case, 'Yakuza'. I didn't know the real terms for Yakuza (my girlfriend assures me it's a real variation, but she doesn't remember the names for everything), so I just made stuff up to make it more ninja-like. Also, the people this is listed under is not a pairing, that's just who the main characters are.
Disclaimer: I do not own Naruto
Kakashi looked around the the circle of gathered Genin. There was his team, Team 7, and then there were Teams 8, 10, and Team Gai, and lastly the Yondaime Kazekage's children, Temari, Kankuro, and Gaara. He was the only 'adult' present. "Alright, now that we're all gathered here tonight, it's finally time to play a round of 'Yakuza'."
Naruto raised his hand. "Eh, Kaka-sensei... how do you play?"
Gaara crossed his arms. "I am also interested in the rules."
Kakashi sighed. "Oh, right, you and Gaara here had depraved childhoods, so you wouldn't know... well... hmmm... it takes a while to explain, but I'll try my best. At it's most basic, it's a game of the villagers versus the Yakuza, who are out to 'kill' the villagers. Every round, the Yakuza pick someone that they want dead. Then, the medic-nin picks a person to save. If that person happens to be the one who got attacked, then they are saved. If not..." He drew his finger across his throat, causing Naruto to put his hand around his own throat as he gulped. "Anyways, then there's the ANBU, who picks a random person, and then the narrator tells the ANBU whether or not that person is with the Yakuza. Finally, it's everyone's turn, and everyone debates on who they should execute as a Yakuza member. The ANBU, of course, has a slight advantage in this, but anyone can claim to be the ANBU, as you can't really prove it. So, by the end of the villager's turn, should the vote have a majority, someone gets executed. If that person is the last Yakuza member, then the game is over. If not, the game continues. One last thing- if the medic or ANBU gets killed, you won't know until the end of the game, as I'll keep giving them their turns. Any questions?"
Neji spoke up. "Just a reminder to everybody that they should stay in character, and to ignore the dead should they speak. Also, please remember that the only time you are allowed to speak is during the day time, when all the villagers are awake, and that out of the three positions- Yakuza, medic-nin, and ANBU- the only one you are allowed to state you have is ANBU. You can claim to have other jobs, as well; for example, Ino could claim that she's a florist, or Naruto could claim to be Hokage."
Naruto grinned. "I like this game!" He then tilted his head. "What does... 'stay in character' mean?"
Sakura sighed. "It means, Naruto, that you should act like this is all real. Say, if I were to die, you pretend to mourn my loss. It also means that you shouldn't mention the fact that this is a game."
Naruto nodded in understanding. "I see... so, how do you pick who is who?"
Kakashi 'eye-smiled'. "Ah, I'll be taking care of that. Normally, we'd use some cards to decide who gets what job, but... since somebody forgot to bring the cards..." All eyes narrowed at Kakashi- after all, it had been his job to bring the cards. "...I'll decide for you. I have a pretty good idea of who would be good for what position... ah, that reminds me. There will be two Yakuza members, one medic-nin, and one ANBU. So, ready to play?" There were smiles, nods, and smirks all around. "Good. Now, close your eyes and bow your heads. If I tap you twice, you are a Yakuza member; three times, and you're the medic-nin; four times, and you're the ANBU."
Naruto spoke up again. "What if you only tap us once?"
Kakashi 'eye-smiled' again, not that anybody could see it. "Then that means I bumped into you on accident. Now, then..." He slowly walked around the circle, tapping whoever he felt like. Twice for Hinata and Lee, thrice for Gaara, and a tap times four for Neji. "Yakuza... awaken. It's time to kill." Both Hinata and Lee looked mildly surprised that the other had been picked, but went right to work. Hinata's first pick was Kankuro, while Lee's was Temari; after a moment, Hinata conceded and also pointed at Temari. Kakashi nodded as he noted their choice. "Yakuza, go back to sleep. Medic-nin, awaken, and choose who you want to save." Gaara looked around, frowning as he tried to decide who he should save. After a minute, he picked Naruto. Kakashi again nodded. "Medic-nin, go back to sleep. ANBU, awaken... who do you accuse of being a Yakuza?" Neji looked around, and settled on Naruto. Kakashi shook his head, indicating that he was not a Yakuza. "ANBU, go back to sleep. Villagers, awaken. A terrible tragedy has struck- Temari, one of the ambassadors from Suna, has been assassinated in the middle of the night. Her skull was crushed by the very same fan she used to fight."
Naruto cringed. "Ow... I'm just glad it wasn't me."
Kakashi continued. "So, villagers, who do you think is a Yakuza member? Choose wisely, for you just might take an innocent life..."
Naruto looked around a bit. "Hmmm.... I pick.... Sasuke!"
Sasuke looked offended. "Why would you choose me? I don't have anything to do with Temari!"
Naruto scratched the back of his head. "I dunno... it seemed like a good idea at the time..."
Sakura sighed. "Let's try to look at this logically. Who would actually want Temari dead?"
All eyes focused on Tenten. Her head seemed to retract a little into her shoulders. "Wh-what? Come on, you guys know me! I'm not like that!"
Lee narrowed his eyes. "But... it's a known fact that you had a grudge against Temari. Also, you happen to wield quite a few heavy weapons yourself, so it is more than possible for you to lift the fan to give the finishing blow..."
Tenten glared at Lee. "Hey! I'm your teammate! Have a little faith in me, alright?"
Shino spoke up. "I say Lee's a Yakuza. It would be just like one to commit such a crime and make it look like somebody else did it. Lee seemed to have that explanation a little... prepared."
Kiba put his hand to his chin. "Yeah... that does seem a little suspicious..."
Kankuro shrugged his shoulders. "I don't care, as long as somebody pays for my sister's death. I may not look like it, but I'm kinda ticked off right now."
Kakashi chuckled. "So, any other nominations?" The Genin were silent. "Alright then... all in favor of Sasuke, raise your hand." The only hand raised was Naruto's. "All in favor of Lee, raise your hand." Shino, Kiba, and Chouji raised their hands. "And all in favor of Tenten..." The rest of the Genin shot up their hands. "Well, the Tenten's have it. *ahem* Tenten was summarily executed by beheading at sundown, and the people could only hope that they had made the right choice... sadly, however, the killings continued the following night. Villagers, fall asleep." The Genin obediently put their heads down, eyes closed. "Yakuza, awaken." Hinata and Lee both woke up. Temari narrowed her eyes, while Tenten opened her mouth to speak. It was quickly covered by Kakashi's hand. "Sorry, Tenten, but dead men tell no tales." Tenten glared at him, but made no sound as Hinata and Lee began to choose their next victim. First, Lee's finger was pointed at Shino, but Hinata shook her head, indicating that it was a bad idea. Soon, their fingers settled on Kiba, though Hinata was reluctant to do so. Kakashi smirked under his mask. Good, so they know not to go after Shino directly... doing so would only arouse more suspicion towards Lee. And killing Kiba takes suspicion away from Hinata, as well... though, the perfect way to do that would be to kill Naruto.
Kakashi nodded at them as they looked at him. "Yakuza, go to sleep. Medic-nin, awaken." Gaara got up, and quickly pointed at his brother. Kakashi nodded again as he looked at Gaara. "Medic-nin, go to sleep. ANBU, awaken." Neji quickly pointed towards Shino, and again got a 'no' from Kakashi. He scowled as he put his head down. "ANBU, go to sleep. Villagers, awaken. Another tragedy has struck- someone took Kiba and Akamaru and put them through a meat grinder, and donated the meat to the local dog pound. The owners of the pound were naturally suspicious of the meat, so they had it analyzed... that is how it was discovered what it really was."
Naruto put a hand over his mouth. He looked slightly green. "I think I'm going to be sick..."
Kakashi chuckled. "So, villagers, who do you think is a Yakuza?"
Sakura spoke up first. "I think it was... Shino. He's the only one who really knew Kiba, and could possibly hold a grudge against him."
Shino raised an eyebrow. "And what would I hold a grudge against him about?"
Hinata shyly spoke up. "Umm... there was that time that Akamaru peed on you when they were practicing their Dynamic Marking..."
Shino shook his head. "I got over it..."
Hinata summoned up a bit of bravery. "No... it's not like you to just get over things. You still hold a grudge against Naruto for coming to school dressed like you one day..."
Naruto chuckled while grinning. "Ah, I remember that... good times."
Shino narrowed his eyes behind his glasses. "That's different. That was deliberately aimed at me."
Hinata bit her lip. "Still..."
Shino looked at her. "I thought we were teammates. Why are you helping the prosecution?"
Hinata looked surprised, and her head seemed to retract into her jacket. "Um... I... uh... it just kind of... slipped out..."
Shino crossed his arms. "However, I'm still inclined that Lee killed Temari... of that I am certain."
Neji sighed. "Well, I say that for sure it's not Shino."
Lee looked at his teammate. "And what makes you so sure, Neji?"
Neji sighed again. "Because... I'm the ANBU."
Lee's eyes widened. "What? That can't be right, I'm the AN-" He clamped his hands over his mouth. Neji glared at him.
"Why would you lie about being the ANBU, unless... I agree with Shino. Lee's a Yakuza."
Lee hung his head in shame. "If that is what you believe... to counter, I shall accuse you of being a fake as well. I hate to do it, as you are my teammate, and my eternal rival, but... if you are committing these heinous acts, then I shall not hold back!"
Kakashi looked at the Genin. "So, any other nominations besides Lee, Neji, and Shino?" They shook their heads. "Alright, then... all for Lee, raise your hands." Shino, Neji, Chouji, and Naruto raised their hands. "All for Shino, raise your hands." Hinata, Lee, Sasuke, Sakura, and Ino raised their hands. "And all for Neji..." Gaara, Kankuro, and Shikamaru raised their hands. "At sunset, Shino was placed in a small, airtight room, and the air was laced with insecticides. He and his colony of kikaichu died of it. Now, then, villagers... go to sleep. Yakuza, awaken." Shino clenched his fists when he saw that Lee was, indeed, a Yakuza, but didn't say anything. "Choose your victim." It took a while for them to decide, but they settled on Chouji- while he hadn't really said anything, he had voted against Lee twice now. Neji had verbally opposed Lee, and therefore it would be more suspicious if they took him out, especially since he claimed to be an ANBU.
"Yakuza, go to sleep. Medic-nin, awaken." Gaara's instincts told him Lee was in the most danger, so he chose Lee. "Alright, medic-nin, go to sleep. ANBU, awaken." Neji was pointing towards Lee before his head was fully upright. Kakashi gave an eye-smile and nodded. Neji smirked in victory as he put his head down. "Villagers, awaken. Yet another death has befallen Konoha- poor Chouji's food was poisoned, and he died of a heart attack. His parents were also poisoned, but they were more used to poison and their bodies dealt with it. I leave it to you to decide who did it."
Shikamaru growled. "Alright, whoever this is has gone too far- I didn't really care about the others, but Chouji's my best friend. This will not go unpunished."
Neji smirked as he prepared his little speech on how Lee had done it when Lee spoke up. "I saw it! While I was out on my ANBU patrol, I saw Neji coming out of Chouji's house, a small package in his hands! i didn't think much of it at the time, but...!"
Neji growled. "That's a lie and you know it! I was the one who saw you coming out of Chouji's house with a small package in your hands while I was on ANBU patrol!"
Shikamaru grunted. "Getting a little desperate, aren't you Neji? To rely on tactics like that..."
Neji sputtered. "I'm telling you, he's a liar!"
Shikamaru sighed. "Poor Neji. Trapped like a rat, with nowhere to go, he's finally starting to break down."
Neji looked panicked. "C-come on, guys! You know me! I'm not some... killer! I could never do that kind of stuff! You believe me, don't you, Naruto?"
Naruto frowned. "Well... I dunno... Lee's a bit more convincing than you are... sorry, Neji. I give you the thumbs-down."
Neji looked around frantically. "C-come on, guys! I'm telling you, it's not me!"
Kakashi 'eye-smiled'. "All in favor of offing Neji, raise your hand." Gaara, Kankuro, Shikamaru, Ino, Lee, Hinata, Sakura, Sasuke, and Naruto all raised their hands. Kakashi's eye-smile didn't fade. "Neji was quickly dealt with when Hiashi activated his Curse Seal and killed him. Villagers, go to sleep. Yakuza, awaken." Neji gave an extremely harsh glare at Lee when Lee got up. "Choose your victim." They quickly chose their next target- Ino. "Yakuza, go to sleep. Medic-nin, awaken. Who do you choose to heal?" Gaara looked around a bit before picking Naruto. "Alright. Medic-nin, go to sleep. ANBU, awaken." Chouji, being recently dead, was the only one of the dead who had yet to find out that Neji was, indeed, telling the truth when he said he was the ANBU. "ANBU, go to sleep. Villagers, awaken. The Yakuza strike again- this time, it was one Yamanaka Ino who fell victim to their wiles. I will not go into details about her death, but it was... gruesome, to say the least. Villagers, decide who to execute."
Sasuke frowned. "Wouldn't it be better to imprison them than execute them? I mean, that's kind of harsh..."
Sakura frowned back at him. "So far, they are directly responsible for the deaths of four people, the attempted murder of Mr. and Mrs. Akimichi, and partially responsible for the deaths of three more. I think execution is pretty reasonable."
Shikamaru sighed. "This death toll is troublesome... I just want to lay Chouji and Ino's spirits to rest, alright? Let's get this over with as fast as possible. Who here would want Ino dead?" This time, eyes seemed to shift to Sakura.
Sakura waved her hands in front of herself. "Oh, nonononono, not me. She may have been my rival, but she was my best friend once. I'm not the one who did it, I swear!"
Lee nodded his head up and down. "She's right, it wasn't her."
Sasuke glared at Lee. "Alright, Mr. ANBU, who did do it, then?"
Lee sighed. "I don't know for sure, yet, but... if I had to make a guess... it would have to be you, Sasuke."
Sasuke looked surprised. "Me?"
Gaara nodded. "It would make sense... I've seen that Ino girl bother you before... if it were the old me, I would've killed her, too..."
Sakura shivered. "By that logic, he would've killed me first..."
Naruto gulped. "Or me..."
Sasuke sighed. "Well, I'm going to have to vote for... Shikamaru."
Shikamaru's eyes widened. "M-me? Why me?"
Sasuke snorted in contempt. "Look at it. Everyone who has died so far has had a connection with Shikamaru. Kiba and Chouji were his old buddies back at the Academy, and he's hung out with both Ino and Temari quite a bit since he became a ninja."
Shikamaru narrowed his eyes again. "Oh, so just because all of my friends are dead, I'm automatically the Yakuza member, huh?"
Sasuke smirked. "Well, it's not a perfect theory... but it's a better case than the ones against me and Sakura."
Kakashi looked around. "Any other nominations?" Everyone shook their heads. "Alright, then... all for Sakura, raise your hand." Hinata was the only one to raise a hand. "All for Sasuke, raise your hands." This time, it was just Naruto, Gaara, and Kankuro. "And all for Shikamaru..." Lee, Sasuke, and Sakura raised their hands. Kakashi looked around. "Is there anyone who would like to change their vote? Anyone at all?" Naruto, after a moment, nodded. "Put my vote towards Shikamaru. If that really is the trend, I'd be next." Shikamaru looked a little hurt, but Kakashi ignored him. "Alright, then. Shikamaru was sentenced to the electric chair, as dying standing up was 'too troublesome'. Villagers, fall asleep. Yakuza, awaken." Shikamaru mentally swore when he saw that it was Lee and Hinata behind the whole thing. They proceeded to their next victim- Sasuke. "Yakuza, go to sleep. Medic-nin, awaken." Gaara looked around, and hesitantly pointed towards Sasuke. "Medic-nin, go to sleep. ANBU, awaken." Shikamaru looked at Neji apologetically when Lee did not get up. Neji just glared at him in silence. "ANBU, go to sleep. Villagers, awaken. This past night, Uchiha Sasuke was nearly forcibly drowned at the lake. Luckily, a medic-nin was nearby and was able to revive him. Sadly, Sasuke's memory was affected by the ordeal, including who his assailant was. Talk about who you think may have done it."
Naruto immediately pestered Sasuke. "So, you really don't know who did it, huh?"
Sasuke snorted. "Nope. Not a clue."
Sakura sighed. "That's too bad... I want this whole thing over and done with. Who knows, I might be the one who gets executed next..."
Naruto gulped. "Sakuraaaa, don't say things like that, you'll jinx yourself!"
Kankuro decided to speak up for once. "So, who do we have on the list of suspects? Me, Gaara, Lee, Hinata, Naruto, Sasuke, and Sakura..." he pointed towards Team 7. "I think one of you three did it. You're the only team left unscathed."
Sakura growled at him. "Did you already forget about the attempt on Sasuke's life?"
Kankuro scratched the back of his head. "Oh, yeah, hmm. That presents a problem, doesn't it..."
Gaara looked towards Lee and Hinata. "What about one of those two? They no longer have teammates..."
Naruto shook his head. "No, Lee's with the ANBU... and Hinata's, well, Hinata. She would have to be really ticked off just for her to hurt a fly."
Sasuke snorted. "It's always the quiet ones..."
Sakura shook her head. "Talking about quiet, Gaara and Kankuro have said, like, two lines each this entire time. I think that that's kind of suspicious..."
Gaara sighed. "So it's agreed, then. We're all suspicious."
There was silence for a moment. Kakashi coughed. "So, since you've all accused everyone else... let's start with the voting. All for Gaara, raise your hand." All of Team 7 raised their hands. Kakashi sighed. "Well, that's that. Gaara was sentenced to death by double Chidori through the chest, seeing that not much else could hurt him. Villagers, go to sleep. Yakuza, awaken, and choose your next target." Gaara smirked in triumph when he realized that he had been right in his assumption that it had been Lee and Hinata, but then scowled when he realized that he had already lost the game, meaning he had realized too little too late. Lee and Hinata both immediately pointed towards Kankuro. "Yakuza, go to sleep. Medic-nin, awaken." Of course, nothing happened- it was just Kakashi keeping the shroud of mystery over who the medic-nin really was up. " Medic-nin, go to sleep. ANBU, awaken." Again, nothing happened- but by continuing to give the ANBU a turn, Kakashi was perpetuating Lee's lie.
"ANBU, go to sleep. Villagers, awaken. This morning, Kankuro was found hanging from an archway, with strings attached to his limbs like that of a puppet, and a noose around his neck. Discuss who you think may have done it."
Naruto turned to Sasuke. "I'm starting to think it really is Sasuke... I mean, hey, his older brother was a murderer. How much would it take to push him over that same edge?"
Sasuke growled. "Do not compare me with my brother. I'm nothing like him!"
Hinata twiddled her fingers. "I... I agree with Naruto. I think Sasuke did it."
Sakura was horrified. "B-but, but... I say Naruto did it!"
Lee shook his head. "I'm sorry, but... I also agree with Naruto and Hinata."
Kakashi shook his head. "Uchiha Sasuke, the last Uchiha, was sentenced to a public hanging, a mirror of the last crime he supposedly committed. But... well, you'll see. Villagers, go to sleep. "Yakuza, awaken." Both Hinata and Lee immediately pointed at Sakura and Naruto, respectively. After a minute, neither had budged from their choices. In a surprise move, Hinata pointed her finger at Lee, eliciting gasps from the dead. Lee pointed at himself quizzically, trying to make sure her head was on straight. Wrong move. "Yakuza, go to sleep." Lee nearly fell over, and glared at Kakashi. Kakashi eye-smiled again. "I said, go to sleep." Lee silently sighed, and put his head down. "Medic-nin, awaken." After a moment, he continued. "Medic-nin, go to sleep. ANBU, awaken." Again, there was a lack of action. "ANBU, go to sleep. Villagers, awaken. Last night... Rock Lee was strangled to death in his apartment. Discuss who may have done it."
Hinata twiddled her thumbs again. "Umm... I think Sakura did it."
Naruto looked surprised. "B-but... Sakura doesn't dislike Lee that much..."
Sakura growled. "Well, I still say Naruto did it!"
Naruto looked offended. "Hey! I wouldn't kill Bushy-Brows! He's one of my friends!"
Sakura crossed her arms. "So was everyone else."
Naruto tilted his head. "That's true, but... come on! It wasn't me!"
Kakashi coughed and interrupted them. "So, votes on Naruto, raise your hand." Sakura was the only one. "Votes on Sakura, raise your hand." Hinata raised hers immediately, and after a moment, so did Naruto. "Alright, then. Sakura was stoned to death by the villagers... not that there are many left, at this point. Villagers, go to sleep. Yakuza, awaken." Hinata refused to point a finger at Naruto. Kakashi raised an eyebrow quizzically, but said nothing about it. "Yakuza, go to sleep. Medic-nin, awaken." Nothing happened. "Medic-nin, go to sleep." ANBU, awaken." Again, nothing happened. "ANBU, go to sleep. Villagers, awaken." Naruto gulped as he looked at Hinata, who was looking back at him, smiling. "Last night... nobody died. Congratulations, villagers, it appears you have won against the Yakuza threat... but, I ask you, at what cost? Six innocents were lost to the netherworld in your haste to blame somebody. I hope you're happy.... the end!"
Naruto, who had not been counting the deaths, cheered. "Woohoo! Alright, Hinata! We're the survivors!" As everybody got up, he dashed to her side, hugged her, picked her up, and twirled her around before putting her down. He began dragging a heavily blushing Hinata towards the door. "Come on! Victory ramen is on me!"
As they left, Sakura twitched. "Did she just... kill everyone, and betray her comrades... just to get a date with Naruto? Or is that just me?"
Kasek: Let me know what you thought of it :3
Killed: Temari, Kiba, Chouji, Ino, Kankuro, Lee. Almost killed: Sasuke. Executed: Tenten, Shino, Neji, Shikamaru, Gaara, Sasuke, Sakura.