A/N: Yeah. Don't ask.

Disclaimer: Nope.


Ponderations of a Fangirl

by Queen of Pascalities


Written while listening to:

Bowling For Soup – When We Die


I'm a genius. I'm aware of that. I'm one of the top achievers in my class. I almost don't need to study, I just know things. Sometimes, it feels like I can sense stuff. I swear. However, there is one thing that I'll never understand.

Uchiha Sasuke doesn't date.

I've been a faithful fangirl for over five years, I've stalked him since I was eleven, I've followed him just about anywhere he went and I still don't get what's up with him. I've faced many hypotheses, but none of them seemed to fit.

First, I thought he just hadn't hit puberty yet. That proved to be wrong, since I heard his (rather idiotic) friend Naruto tell another of his friends that Sasuke-kun had spent a whole morning trying to hide his boner.

Then I considered (with much horror and disgust) that he could be gay. Again, I was wrong, because he said himself that he was straight when a creepy guy (Rock Lee, I think) asked him out. And, you know, whatever Sasuke-kun says, I'll believe and worship.

There were also the hypotheses where Sasuke's parents forbade him to date until he's major, or where he was actually an alien who was on a mission to contaminate the Earth, but none of them worked either since his parents are dead and an alien wouldn't know what gay and straight mean.

Unfortunately, that didn't answer my question. I still didn't know why he didn't date. Not only didn't he date, but he didn't even look at girls. Or boys. Well, he looked at them, but not in a you're-hot-I-want-to-date-you way. More in a you're-in-my-vision-line-so-my-eyes-are-bound-to-be-on-you-for-a-fraction-of-a-second kind of way.

Maybe he doesn't know how to date? I know he's hot and all, but maybe girls don't date him because he can't be romantic to save his life. Ooh, I hadn't considered that. I should add it to my list of hypotheses.

Or maybe he doesn't know how to pick up a conversation! He never really does talk, maybe that's his problem. He can't use pick up lines. Oh my God, I might be onto something, right now.

Oh, here's another one! Maybe he's really shy! Or maybe he wanted to wait to a specific date, like the last day of school! Which is today. Oh, the irony!

That must be it! I'll just have to watch out for every girl who approaches him today. Of course, girls are bound to harass him today, it's his (and my) last day of high school. They all want to try and talk to him before he leaves for college. Sad, really. Most of them don't stand a chance, they're still ninth and tenth graders. I, however, am old enough to hope for some kind of development between him and myself.


Maybe he was too shy to come up to me! If that's his problem, he can for get about it right now, I'm all his! Come to me, baby, I'm waiting for you with arms wide open!


Moving on.


That's it. It's over. I'm not in high school anymore. I've graduated. So has Sasuke. And he still hasn't made a move, the jerk. Not only did he not approach me, but he didn't approach anyone else! He sat with all of us graduates until he was called on stage for his diploma, then he went to give back his graduate gown, met with a very smexy man that must be his brother and headed for his car.

I'm following him, of course.

I'm hiding behind a big Chevy, watching him get into his Toyota. His brother waves him goodbye through the window and heads off, probably to his own car. The Toyota rolls out of the parking lot. I run to my car and hurriedly get inside. This is my chance to know, if not why he's never dated, at least why he's leaving the graduating ceremony so early and so alone.

I follow him for at least half an hour on the highway. Is he going far? Maybe he's moving to another town. Maybe he really is an alien trying to contaminate the Earth! Or maybe he's a vampire who starting off again in another country!

I read too much.

Oh, he's turning! Wait for me, my love, I'm coming!

He drives to a school. A rather big school, if you ask me. Some kids are scattered in the parking lot where he stops. They're wearing uniforms. I pity them for a second until I notice Sasuke getting out of his car. He yells something that I don't understand because I'm still in my car, and I see a group of students that must be around my and Sasuke's age turn their head to him. A girl with really queer hair detaches from the group and runs to him.

I quickly get out of my car. If she's going to molest him, she'll have to do it over my dead body. I run closer, ready to jump on her if she tries to harm my precious Sasuke-kun.

He, however, doesn't seem alarmed to have this girl running to him like a starving dog runs to a piece of juicy meat. Actually, he's smiling. Yes, ladies and gentlemen, he's smiling.

That's another thing. He never smiles. Well, he never smiled until now. And I swear, I never thought he could get this handsome! He's never looked this happy in the last five years!

I turn my gaze to the girl, who's still running. She's getting too close for my comfort, but I guess not for Sasuke-kun's. Then I notice her face. Besides the fact that (I have to admit, as much as I don't want to) she's really pretty, her features are bearing the same expression the happiest person on the planet would have. You know, the one where you're smiling the widest smile in history and crying your eyes out at the same time? Yeah, that one.

She takes a jump and lands in Sasuke-kun's arms, her own wrapping around his neck. He catches her, letting out a small chuckle (or maybe it was a sob, I don't know) and holds her tightly to his chest.

As jealous as I might be right now, I have to admit that this is the most touching moment I've witnessed in my life. I hear the girl repeat "You're back!" over and over again and I feel myself tearing up. My eyes itch because of my mascara, but I ignore them. It's only when Sasuke-kun says "I missed you so much" that my tears finally decide to slide down my cheeks.

I don't know if I'm crying because I wish Sasuke-kun would be telling me that or if it's because I've never seen anything sweeter.

The girl pulls back slightly from his neck and slams her mouth down on his. He entangles his fingers in her (very odd) hair and pulls her even closer to himself. She wraps her legs around him.

I suddenly remember that I'm staring at a kissing couple and that it actually is very rude and I turn my head to the side, tears still streaming down my face. I try to wipe them without smudging my make-up, but I know I don't really succeed.

"Hey! You! Who are you?"

I jump, startled and look up. A guy, who is standing with the group of people where the girl was a few minutes ago, is looking at me, seeming more curious than angry. I turn to look behind me to make sure he's really talking to me, then I look back at him, nervous.

He's actually quite handsome. Not as much as Sasuke-kun, but I must admit that I like his shoulder-length blueish hair and his grayish-green eyes. He walks up to me, now with a worried look on his face.

"Are you okay? Why are you crying?" He asks me.

Instead of answering, I turn my gaze to Sasuke-kun and the girl. They've stopped kissing and they're looking at me too.

"I, uh… I-…"

"Oy, Uchiha! Do you know her?" he bellows to Sasuke-kun.

Sasuke comes closer, holding the girl's hand. Slowly, as if he were hesitating, he answers:

"Yeah, I do."

The girl let's go of his hand and approaches me, tucking a strand of her hair behind her ear. She takes my hands in hers and asks me:

"Are you okay?" Her voice is so soft and comforting that I start crying even more.

She brings me into a hug. I can feel my heart sink to my stomach. Of all the girls Sasuke-kun could have fallen in love with, he chose the sweetest girl in the whole freaking Universe.

She pulls back and smiles to me.

"I'm Sakura. What's your name?" She asks me sweetly.

"I-… I'm Karin."

"Nice to meet you, Karin. Sasuke-kun, you said you knew her?"

"Yeah, she goes to my school," he says, ever-so-coolly.

I couldn't believe it. He had actually acknowledged my presence! He looks at me for a second before speaking again.

"What are you doing here?"

"I-… I was, uh… Well, you see…" I guess it'd be better if I told him right away. "Okay, well, I wanted to know why you didn't date anyone at our school. With all the observation I'd done since seventh grade, I could see that you were fairly normal, but I couldn't understand why you didn't even look at anyone – not even a boy – in a I-want-to-date-you way. Plus, when I saw you leaving today, I wondered why you were leaving alone, so I followed you."

Nobody talks. Not one word comes out of anyone's mouth. They're all staring at me like I'm the craziest person they'd ever met.

After a few minutes, the blue-haired guy speaks out.

"Well, I guess now you know why Uchiha didn't date." He motions to Sasuke-kun and Sakura.

"I could only see her in the summer vacations," Sasuke says hesitantly. "But I didn't want to break up when autumn came."

Right at that moment, I take back everything I ever said about him not being romantic.

"Every school year, we wait for the summer vacations to see each other again, but I guess this year was harder than the others," Sakura says.

"She's been driving me insane with all her "Sasuke-kun this" and Sasuke-kun that" and "I miss him sooo much"," the blue-haired guy says. "I'm glad they're going to the same college, I don't think I could bear another year like the five past ones."

Everyone chuckles, then goes quiet. This is the most awkward silence there's ever been. I stare at my feet, not knowing what to say. I guess everybody else is thinking the same, because no one speaks.

After what seems like hours, a blonde girl says:

"Well, we should go get ready for prom."

Everyone mumbles in agreement and goes their separate ways, except for Sakura and Sasuke, who walk together to Sasuke's car, and for the blue-haired guy, who's still standing in front of me.

"I'm Suigetsu, by the way." He says, his face splitting up in a wide grin. "What's your name again?"

"K-Karin." I answer, a bit dumbfounded.

"Karin… Cool!" He says and walks away. I stare at his back, speechless.

He stops a few yards away from me, turns around and grins again.

"Will you go to my prom with me?" he asks.

It takes my brain a few minutes to process what he said, then I feel my lips stretch into a smile.

Now I won't have to be the least bit bitter about Sasuke already dating someone else. At least he's in love, right? For a fangirl, all that counts is that your chosen stalked is happy, right?

And, who knows, maybe one day, so will I be.


A/N: Not my best, but I'm satisfied. I just had to write it down so that I could go back to my other stories.

Please review!

Queen of Pascalities