Disclaimer: The characters and situations in this story belong to Marvel Comics, Fairview Entertainment, Dark Blades Films, and other entities, and I do not have permission to borrow them. No infringement is intended in any way, and this story is not for profit. Any errors are mine, all mine, no you can't have any.

Spoilers: News about Iron Man 2.

Yeah, I'm with Tony on this one.


"You have got to be bullshitting me." Tony stared at his friend. "Do they honestly think anyone's going to believe this?"

Rhodey shrugged fatalistically. "The brass thinks it will. Orders are orders, Tony, you know that."

"Yeah, sure." Tony scoffed. He knew just how much attention Rhodey paid to his orders--and just how much leeway the colonel had when he didn't like them.

There was that last month in Afghanistan, after all.

Rhodey grinned. "Actually, I think it'll be kind of fun. I always wanted to be a super-spy." He thumped Tony on the shoulder. "The one thing I'm sorry I'll miss is seeing him getting used to you."

"And that's another thing," Tony said, aggrieved. "You and I have been buddies for twenty years, and they just expect me to pretend this stranger is my best friend?"

"He's a nice guy, Tony. I'm sure you'll get along great once you know him." Rhodey lifted the bottle he held for a swallow.

"He doesn't even look like you," Tony complained, gesturing at the dossier with his half-eaten slice of pizza. "For one thing, he's short. And his skin is darker."

"He's the same height as you."

"You know what I mean." Tony refused to be diverted. "I'll tell you right now I'm not redesigning your armor for this SOB."

Rhodey shrugged, unruffled. "That's up to you. You can always change your mind later." He looked down at the thin sheaf of papers that outlined the life of his presumptive dopplegänger. "It's not permanent, you know. The mission's only supposed to last two years."

Tony glared, resigned but not mollified. "Just don't get yourself killed. I can't come pull your ass out of trouble if I'm pretending you're still here." He picked up his beer.

"Same goes for you, Tin Man." Rhodey leaned over and clinked his bottle against Tony's.

They drank, and Tony slumped back with a sigh. "Seriously, though. Nobody is going to think this guy is you."

"Why not? It worked for Due South." Rhodey picked up another slice.

"For who what?"

Rhodey rolled his eyes. "We really gotta work on your pop culture education, Tony." He raised his voice. "Hey, Jarvis, call up the Netflix playlist for me."

Tony snorted, and reached for another beer.