A Minor Form of Despair.
Patience, n. A minor form of despair, disguised as a virtue.
-Ambrose Bierce The Devil's Dictionary

Walker moans in his sleep. Not particularly in pleasure, no, but it's there and Link has been trained to be a light sleeper. He hears the way Walker's mattress shifts as he rolls unto his side, another moan, a muttered name too garbled to recognize. Then, silence once more.

Quietly, Link moves, grabs the journal where he writes any and every change Walker might show and carefully, he writes the time and nothing further, since Walker just spoke gibberish. Link waits for a few moments before he settles back down on his mattress, and within seconds he's asleep again.

Within the hour he's awake again, with Walker moaning once more. The frequency isn't the usual one, the way the mattress creaks also wrong and Link sits up before he's even completely awake, reaching for the knife he keeps under the pillow at the same time he reaches for his journal in case Walker says something important.

Walker is laying on his stomach, arms crossed underneath the pillow and – Link blinks and then looks away, coughs a little awkwardly. He is absolutely certain that Walker knows that something like this is a complete violation to the rules, but then again he is a teenager, and something like hormones acting up when he's dreaming is hardly his--

The teenager moans again, the sound barely muffled by the pillow, and Link doesn't need to turn around and see to picture perfectly just how Walker moves his hip, pressing against the mattress, rubbing himself against it.

There is a moment of wondering what he ought to do in a situation like this. Wait outside? That's strictly forbidden since Walker is to be under strict observation twenty four-seven. Wake him up? Link considers that, turning to glance at Walker's head for a second, thinking almost without realizing on how little the boy sleeps already. Besides, it's not something he's doing on purpose.

Link takes a deep breath before he lays down again, deciding to ignore the sounds Walker makes, closing his eyes and turning to the side. However, it's harder than it ought to be this 'ignoring Walker', just as it's hard when he's awake and not doing his job. Walker's breathing has deepened, and the way the mattress creaks is too distracting. Link keeps looking at the wall and he keeps his eyes closed, tries to think of anything other than the boy who keeps on sleeping besides him.

He wonders, though. Is Walker dreaming about anyone in particular? Perhaps he's dreaming about miss Li, her legs wrapped around Walker's hips, her arms around her shoulders, the soft press of her breasts against his chest, of the gentle rocking of their hips, the soft warmth that would envelop him. But perhaps no: the way the mattress creaks speaks not of gentle love making but perhaps of fighting. Could Walker be dreaming of exorcist Kanda? Fight and anger, fists on that long black hair and the other exorcist's teeth bared, biting and snarling, both of them cursing as they tear clothes away, and Link knows that Walker wouldn't just stay calm at something like that, that he would fight as well.

Link opens his eyes, clenches his fists and tries taking a few deep, deep breaths to calm himself. Romantic relationships within the Order are strictly forbidden, and he has made sure that Walker knows all the rules that guide them to try and make sure that the boy doesn't get in more troubles than he already is.

Link hears Walker moan again and he resists the urge to turn and see what he's doing, just how he's moving. His own heartbeat is increasing and Link refrains from cursing, tries to distract himself by the number of paperwork they'll have to do tomorrow, tries to estimate how fast it will go and he decides that if the Bookman apprentice doesn't interrupt them again, they'll be able to increase their productivity almost a ten percent.

And then, he can't help but wonder if perhaps Walker is dreaming about him and that apprentice, the playfulness in which they talk to each other. Not as violent as with exorcist Kanda, nor as gentle as with miss Li, more likely, and Link opens his eyes once more, swallows to stop his mouth from feeling so dry.

Walker moans once more, gives a little hitched breath and then he stops moving. Link waits, but the only sound after that is the gentle creak of the mattress as Walker rolls onto his side and nothing else. He's so hard it hurts. Still, he keeps his hands by his side and closes his eyes once more, willing himself to sleep.

Link decides that he shouldn't add this to the journal.