Author's Note: So this is something new, I wrote it before Breaking Dawn (well, started it), and before I got an account on here, but I liked it, edited it, and now, here it is :-) hope you like it
Disclaimer: I don't own Twilight....
Of Dresses and Disasters
"There perfect," Emily said as she finished zipping up my bridesmaid dress. It was the final fitting before her wedding to.. Him. I couldn't bring myself to say his name. My heart was already ripping at the seams.
Emily moved to the side to admire the lilac dress she had chosen for her for her bridesmaids. I had to admit it was pretty as I spun to the side to examine the dress more thoroughly in the mirror.
At least I will look prettier than Emily in the wedding, I thought without much conviction, before scolding myself. I loved Emily, and it wasn't her fault, no it was his...Sams. I knew it was not helping by avoiding his name.
In all honesty, Emily had won. She was marrying the whole reason for my existence-the love of my life- and he had left me with a broken heart. I was upset, but I had agreed to be a bridesmaid, and I was going to go through with it, no matter how sad I was...
"Oh you look gorgeous Leah!" Emily said, breaking through my depression of thoughts. I tried to smile but it looked more like a grimace to me. I knew she was trying to make me forget about my misery, as if she could. I tried as hard as I could to put on a good show- but I never thought I fooled Emily.
She had been and in some ways still was my best friend. She had been my cousin but we were closer than sisters. Until Sam changed that. Drastically. I mean what would anyone do if their best friend stole the love of their life? Or if the man they loved had stolen your best friend? It seemed the entire world was against me, for either way you looked at it- I lost. I lost the love of my life, and my best friend, all in one blow by fate. So may times I wondered what I had done to deserve this; never did an answer present itself.
One day, Sam had said he loved me, and I, so foolishly, had believed him. The next, Emily was all he cared about. I had tried warning Emily about how fickle he truly was, but she must have known something I didn't, for never did she listen. Soon, I had given up the warnings, and had tried to move on. Key word being tried...and failed. Miserably.
As I gazed in the mirror I felt the whole weight of my burden begin to crush me with its reality: my best friend and my true love were getting married in a couple weeks. I don't know why I had chosen this, of all moments, to break down, but I felt like I could no longer stand the pain that was sinking in. Totally and completely consuming me. I felt like my heart was actually going to explode. I struggled to keep the tears down as Emily took her wedding dress and quietly slipped into the changing room to try it on- for the last time until the wedding.
I must control myself. I must not cry. I must not show her my true feelings. I attempted to will myself to hold together, but how could anything be held together when the pieces were shattered. I was broken, and I was failing to keep myself from falling apart.
At home I could let the tears flow free and let my heart break completely. But not now. No not now. Not while Emily was so happy. As I looked to the door which concealed my cousin, I wiped the flowing tears off my cheeks. I would do this, for Emily.
I turned to the mirror to see puffy red eyes gazing pitifully back at me, and realized my attempts were hopeless. I turned away from the mirror and walked back to change to my clothes. I couldn't bear this anymore. I was going to pieces.
I hurriedly changed and told Emily a story about me needing to watch Seth. Completely false. I heard Emily's voice tell me it was fine, but she knew the truth. I guess it was somewhat of a give-a-way that Seth was 14 and really didn't need to be watched. Especially not lately. It seemed Seth had spiked up at least a foot in the past month. He was now like 6'5". Plus, to watch him, it would also require him being at home, which he hadn't been recently. At all.
I remembered he had been hanging out with Quil lately until he joined the group Sam had started that was running around La Push. It had really hurt my brother to see his friend ditch him for Sam. As if I needed another reason to hate the guy. Why did he have to do this to me?
I knew I was postponing the inevitable when the tears started burning my eyes- but I had already reached my house and was climbing out of the car. I vaguely registered that my dad was home as I opened the door to the living room and sprinted upstairs before reaching my destination. I closed the door to my room behind me and fell onto my bed in a heap of tears. I cried for hours until I finally thought my body was out of tears. But I knew better, I thought I had run out of tears too many times to count; still they would return. As my sobs became sniffles, I heard steps on the stairs. Moments later, a voice echoed through the door to my room.
"Leah?" my dad asked tentatively. "Can I come in sweetheart?" I rolled over and let out a faint agreement.
Without looking up, I heard the door open slowly. When I finally got the courage to face my father, I saw his face display only grief for my suffering. He spoke solemnly. "Leah," he began "I'm so sorry... I never realized how upset you were..." Typical. My dad doesn't understand... But I still forgave him; I knew he tried. My dad, at first, had not realized how in love I was with Sam...how much I had been crushed. "Is there anything I can do...do you want skip the wedding..." he said hesitantly. That did it. The wedding. The wedding in two days.
I broke into a new round of hysteria and I literally thought my heart was going to burst from the pain... it was then I realized it actually was exploding. Fear struck through my heart, almost as terrible as the pain I was now intwined in. The pain was terrible, not just emotionally but physically. My entire body was exploding. Without a doubt, I had never hurt so much in my life, I doubted I could bear it much longer. My body was writhing as I screamed- no howled!- in pain. I could sense my dad in front of me the whole time staring in shock, before he collapsed to the floor clutching his heart.
This was a dream- I knew it. Things like this, they couldn't exist! Even as I thought that fact the pain began to fade though the dream remained. I felt dizzy and began to fall forward until my hands caught me. It was then I was more terrified than I had ever been in my life. For instead of my hands reaching out to catch me, huge furry paws fell to the ground, supporting my weight.
I jerked my neck down to see grey fur covering my skin. This wasn't a dream, this was a nightmare.
I tried to wake myself up to no avail! I ran to the wall, I scratched myself, and everything I could think of but I couldn't wake up! As I turned and twisted around, I caught sight of myself in the mirror and froze. There, gazing back at me, was a grey wolf. This could not be happerning!
I needed to get out of here. If I was hallucinating, brooding on my thoughts would not help at all. So where would I go? No less than a second of pondering the question, I discovered the answer- First Beach.
The beach had become my haven, my safe place. The water there was calm, and it seemed to radiate its peace to me. I made my decision and set out immediately.
So I ran. Faster than I ever thought possible. Soon, I was on the dirt road on the reservation, racing into the woods. I moved faster than I thought possible. Surprisingly, that realization brought me peace. If I was moving faster than any animal, this couldn't be real.
It was then I decided to just enjoy the dream. I found running made me happy, and I forgot about the outside world.
I had always loved track, and now, I was the greatest track runner possible. The wind swept through my long coat, creating a breeze. Though I was running faster than even a car, I could see each individual blade of grass, every pebble I passed. I took in the smells of the forest, which hit me over a thousand times stronger than any smell in my lifetime. As I raced through the forest, I forgot my worries, and enjoyed the race.
It wasn't long before I exited the forest, and looked at my surroundings to see the clear blue water of First Beach, the sunset casting a reflection onto the water. Something interrupted the peace, though, at that moment.
"Jared?" It was a voice. Sam's voice I thought, sadly. I spun around but saw no one. "Yes its Sam." the voice said. I hadn't said anything, though...looks like I was back to the hallucinating theory.
So in this dream-state, could this voice hear my mind. "Yes i can hear you-wait a second who is this- Seth please don't play jokes- I need to know if its you who has changed"
Changed? Seth is supposed to change soon? Wait this is a dream. Who cares what I say. "Seth? No, I am Leah" I answered Sam's voice. Though I thought this wasn't real, things weren't adding up. It was strange, in my dreams I was the center of attention. Always. And I wasn't ever this creative... I guess I would wake up sometime.
"LEAH!!!!" cried Sam, in a shocked voice. "How in the world!! Leah this isn't a dream...."
"Hmm. I don't like this dream." I thought. I had enough reminders of Sam in my life, I preferred if he stayed out of my dreams. "Hey wait a minute I can change this its my dream!!"
"Leah" Sam answered calmly, composing himself now. "This isn't a dream"
"yes, yes, you have said that already, but it has to be." It was funny trying to reason with a character in my dream. Of course, that character was Sam, but why shouldn't it be? I had dreamed of him every night since freshman year...the thought alone dredged up a pit of sadness again.
He had heard that.
"Leah how can I convince you this isn't a dream... Have you tried waking yourself up?" He tried to reason with me.
"Yes and it obviously didn't work." I answered, completely annoyed. Suddenly I started getting flashes of a different point of view, other than the First Beach, it was Sam's point of view, I realized with a shock.
"Here Leah I'm coming." The perfect representation of Sam's voice stated as he began running toward me.
Sam was coming, well then what? I would probably be waking up soon, Sam had stopped playing the hero in my dreams a long time ago. Subconsciously, my mind would wake itself up, determined not to cause me anymore pain.
"Leah turn around." I heard the voice say, drawing me back to earth.
A large, black wolf was approaching me slowly. It was unmistakeably him- I could tell by his eyes. The eyes I had stared into when he told me he loved me; the eyes I had stared into weeks ago, on that horrific day...
Author's Note: Like it? Review please and tell me your thoughts!!! :-) Next chapter, Leah discovers this isn't a dream.. :-)
~Dreams of Bubbles~