Something to Talk About

Author: Sidda D.

Summary: Everyone's talking about Director Shepard and Agent Gibbs. But what exactly are they saying? Songfic inspired by Bonnie Raitt's "Something to Talk About".

Disclaimer: Standard disclaimer – I own nothing, I make no money from this, and I intend no copyright infringement. NCIS and all recognizable characters belong to DPB et al. "Something to Talk About" belongs to Bonnie Raitt and BMI.

Notes: This is the first time I've written a songfic, but the lyrics just caught my ear and I couldn't resist a little NCIS fluff. This is also a departure from my traditional writing style as it is almost entirely dialogue. I hope I've conveyed the emotions and situations through the characters and their conversations without confusing anyone too much. Song lyrics are italicized.

People are talkin', talking 'bout people

"I don't believe it, Carl."

"I'm serious, man!"

"The Director and Agent Gibbs… I don't know, dude."

"No really, I heard from reputable sources."

"Yeah, like who?"

"James, the night janitor. He saw them in her office last night… with takeout from Palena's."

"Maybe they were just working a case."

"C'mon, you ever hear of Gibbs bringing fancy Italian food and working with Morrow at midnight? No, something definitely happened."

I hear them whisper, you won't believe it

"You're kidding."

"No, I heard it from Carl over in Legal. Special Agent Gibbs and the Director were… you know, going at it in her office after everyone left yesterday."

"Wow, I always knew there was something going on there, have you seen the way he looks at her?"

"Yeah, but c'mon, she's a redhead, she's smokin' hot, and has legs that go on for miles. Gibbs never stood a chance."

"I'm telling you, Roberts, we've gotta get in on DiNozzo's betting pool."

They think we're lovers, kept under covers

"Roberts from IT told me that Gibbs brought her dinner. Isn't that so romantic?"

"I told you, Nora, those two have been together, right under our noses."

"Sneaky. I wonder how long it's been going on…"

"I heard they had a torrid love affair back when she was his partner. Wouldn't it be so sweet if they fell in love all over again?"

"Don't be silly, Libby. This isn't some cheesy romantic comedy."

"Why not? Have you seen how happy she's been lately? Or how about how he always has his hand on the small of her back, guiding her around? It's love. I bet they get married and live happily ever after!"

I just ignore it, but they keep saying
We laugh just a little too loud
We stand just a little too close
We stare just a little too long
Maybe they're seeing, something we don't, darlin'

"Abby, there is no way the Director and Gibbs are getting married."

"How do you know, McGee?"

"I just... I do."

"Know what, Probie?"

"That Gibbs is definitely not marrying the Director, Tony."

"Who thinks he is?"


"Well, I heard from my friend Libby who heard from her friend Nora who heard from her boyfriend… actually it's more like this guy she's dating, Roberts, well not so much dating since they haven't really left the bedroom…"


"Right, anyway my sources say there's something going on between them."

"And I think you're wrong."

"Probie, I don't think you have enough experience in the fine art of office romance to recognize the subtle hints of two people doing the horizontal mambo while working together."

"I've had office romances before, Tony."

"Really? With your boss?"

"Um, not really, no."

"There you go, McGeek. You need to look deeper. Use your investigative skills to find the hidden meaning."

"What hidden meaning?"

"Well, he brings her coffee every day. Although that's actually pretty obvious to a trained, seasoned investigator like me."

"She won't leave the building until he goes home," added Abby.

"Gibbs checks her out every time she walks to MTAC."

"So do you, Tony."

"That's not the point, McGee."

"I caught her staring at his butt."

"They're totally doing it."

"Totally doing what, Agent DiNozzo?"

Three heads whipped around.

Director Jenny Shepard lounged in the doorway, arms crossed and eyebrow quirked.

I feel so foolish, I never noticed

"He DID bring me dinner."

"I'm sorry, did you say something, Jennifer?"

"No, Ducky, I'm just talking to myself."

"Are you feeling quite alright, my dear? You seem a bit preoccupied."

"Thank you for your concern, doctor, but I'm fine. Simply thinking about a situation that recently came to my attention."

"You know, I believe it was Voltaire who once said, 'no problem can withstand the assault of sustained thinking'."

"Is that so?"

"Indeed. Voltaire was a remarkable man - A prolific and vociferous writer like no other. He wrote over 2,000 books in his lifetime, you know. And quite what a lifetime that was. He lived until the ripe old age of 83, practically unheard of in that day and…"

Ducky looked up as the autopsy doors closed with a loud whoosh.

"Oh my, she left. She must get that from Gibbs."

You'd act so nervous, could you be falling for me?

"Need you, Jen."

"Come again, Jethro?"

"I, uh… not what I meant. In a professional capacity."

"Of course. What can I do for you?"

"The Donahue case. Homeland Security is breathing down my neck and I need you to get them to back off."

"I thought they were giving us the lead on this one."

"They are."

"And you…"

"… kinda pissed off their NCIS liaison and told him to shove it where the sun doesn't shine."

"Of course you did. Anything else I should know before I make a call over there?"

"Yeah… Thanks, Jenny."

He placed a steaming cup of coffee on her desk.

It took a rumour to make me wonder
Now I'm convinced I'm going under

"What are you looking at, Abby?"

"The Director."

"I see that, but why?"

"Because she's staring at Gibbs, Ziva."

"I'm confused."

"Look at the way she's looking at him."

"What way is that?"

"Like she suddenly realized he loves her and she loves him."

"Abby, you are talking out of your head."

"Out of my hat, Ziva."

"But you are not wearing a hat."

"That's true."

Thinking 'bout you every day

"C'mon Ziva, all I want is a little background on what you and Jenny discussed about Gibbs in Cairo."


"Why not?"

"I will not betray the Director's confidence, Tony. If you are so interested, you can ask her."

"I can't. She has the power to fire me. Please?"

"For the last time, Tony, NO! Why is everyone so concerned with the Director's love life all of a sudden?"

"Correction, Ziva. I'm not concerned about the Director's love life, I'm concerned about Gibbs' love life."

"And why must you assume that the two are connected?"

"Because she accidentally called the SecNav 'Gibbs' yesterday and you don't do that unless your mind is on someone else. Specifically an older, albeit still handsome, ex-Marine with a curmudgeonly exterior, heart of gold and an appreciation for red-haired women."


"You better not be talkin' about me, DiNozzo."

"Oww, not to mention, a strange way of showing affection. You could've told me he was standing right behind me, Ziva."

"But it is so much more fun this way, Tony."

Dreaming 'bout you every night

"… and so we traced his IP address to a base computer, where we found…"

"In English, McGee."

"Basically, we found e-mails he sent her and have enough probable cause for a warrant."

"So why are you still standing here?"

"Just waiting for Legal to fax it, boss."

"Okay, tell the Director so that we don't have those Homeland Security morons crashing in on the arrest."

"I can't"


"Oh, umm, well, the Director is…"

"Spit it out, McGee."

"She's um, unavailable, boss."


"Cynthia says she isn't to be disturbed for another 15 minutes for anything short of a national emergency."

"She did."

"Yeah, she's, uh, she's on a coffee break. Cynthia says she hasn't been sleeping well."

"Hasn't been sleeping well?"

"Something about bad dreams… uh, boss?"

Gibbs left his desk and headed up the bullpen stairs.

"What, McGee? Go pick this guy up the second that warrant comes through."

Gibbs disappeared into the Director's office.

Hoping that you feel the same way

"Since when did you start taking coffee breaks, Jen?"

"That was Cynthia's excuse, Jethro. I only needed a few minutes to myself."

"You okay?"

"I'm fine, Jethro. Even directors of lower level armed federal agencies get tired once in a while."

"Hear you aren't sleeping well."

"How did you…? Never mind, I don't want to know how half the rumours that run through this place get started."


"With assistance from that chatty night janitor, James, no doubt."

"The scrawny guy with the glasses?"

"The scrawny guy with glasses who saw us eating dinner the other night."


"Things like that become gossip and tend to be grossly misinterpreted, Jethro."

"And that's a problem."

"Half the agency thinks I'm pregnant with your love child, the other half thinks we're like dogs in heat having sex everywhere from my office to autopsy, and I have to endure conversations with SecNav about the propriety of being involved with one of my subordinates."

"Except we aren't… involved."



"You've been bringing me coffee."


"Every day."


"Care to add anything more to the conversation than monosyllables, Jethro?"


"Very mature."

"You seem to be doing fine on your own."

"We need to discuss this, Jethro."

"Discuss what?"

"Whatever this… is. What's going on here between us. We need to approach this like adults and figure out what these feelings me… mmph… oohhh that's good."

"God, Jen."

"Wait… mmm… oh god, I missed you. Wait a minute. You're kissing me."

"You're kissing me back."

"Glad to know we're on the same page."

He kissed her again.

Now that we know it, let's really show it, darlin'

"Quit hogging all the covers."

"You've got all the pillows, Jen."

"You can have one pillow for half the sheets."

"Two pillows."

"No deal, Jethro."

"One pillow and you keep your icicle feet away from me."

"Icicle feet?"

"Those frozen things at the ends of your legs that pass for toes."

"You weren't complaining before."

"You were putting them to better use before."

Buzz. Buzz. Buzz.

"Damn it. Your phone or mine?"

"Yours, I think. Answer it, Jethro."

Let's give them something to talk about
A little mystery to figure out



"Yeah, DiNozzo?"

"I think I…"

"DiNozzo, you have 10 seconds to tell me what is so important that you're interrupting me on my night off."

"I wasn't interrupting you, boss."

"Then what were you doing, DiNozzo?"

"Calling the Director… except you answered."

Let's give them something to talk about
How about love, love, love, love?

"Oh this is too good. Hey Carl, guess what I just heard!"