Hinata Ends With the Soul Caliber

Or

The Incredibly Silly and Awesome Adventures of Urashima Keitaro, Wielder of the Soul Caliber, the Six Girls of the Hinata Apartments, and Sho Minamimoto (With Some Less Important Appearances by Kentaro) in Their Attempt to Save the World From Being Taken Over By Bad Guys Featuring Plentiful Crossovers by Whatever I Damn Well Feel Like, More Commonly Abbreviated as TISAAUWSCSGHASMWSLIATASWFBTOBBGFPCWIDWFLMCAT

Or

That One Weird Love Hina Fic With A Really Long Name

A Love Hina Fan Crack Fic

Synopsis: Keitaro finds the Soul Caliber, and inevitably starts a chain of events that will lead to Ragnarok unless he and the Hinata girls can stop it. Isn't it just convenient that they suddenly gained superpowers? A LoveHina X WorldEndsWithYou X SoulCalibur X WhateverElseIComeUpWith Crack Fic. *TWEWY SPOILERS*


On November 10th, 2008, a budding Fanfiction writer set out to create the most epic fan fiction of all time.

He meant to make a statement, a statement that would rock the FanFiction community for centuries to come.

Then he played "LittleBigPlanet" for several hours, and completely forgot what he was going to write about.

From that moment on, he decided to write about the most bizarre thing he could imagine.

But it was too weird to publish, so he wrote this instead:


Chapter 1: Ominous Foreshadowings

I do not own Love Hina, or anything else for that matter.


I am recording this journal in order to leave behind a record in case something goes horribly wrong. As you know, being Conductor for the Hinata region, I am responsible for any supernatural occurrences in the area.

To this end, I have been preventing Urashima Keitaro from realizing his potential.

Let me explain: As you may know, the last of Nostradamus's "Secret Prophecies", the Secret Prophecy of Algol, states: "when the "Children of Ragnarock" have their powers realized, Ragnarock (the end of the world) will be begin."

These "children" are referred to in the prophecy as:

A Natural Time-Warper

The Sorceress of Momol

A Half-Angel

A Titan

A Goddess

The Luckiest Woman in the World

And, of course, the reincarnation of Siegfried, wielder of the Soul Caliber

The prophecy goes into great details about the identity of the wielder of the Soul Caliber. He will be born in a "Distant Land" (Seeing as Nostradamus would consider Japan to be quite "Distant", I can hardly argue), be nearly immortal, and is described later on in the prophecy as looking exactly like our own manager. And above that, Keitaro has already attracted a pair of possible "Ragnarock Children" (Specifically, Shinobu and Mutsumi), and preexisting company has also started to show supernatural tendencies.

Coincidence?

I have done my best to suppress their development by drawing on the power of the Soul Caliber. But this does not seem to be enough.

The whole "Red Moon" incident also revealed Kaolla Su to be the Sorceress of Momol, and already the government of Momol is preparing for the worst that Ragnarock could offer.

As for Keitaro, he has suffered numerous fatal blows without a scratch on him, signifying a development of Beta-Class Immortality.

And the identity of the Titan is painfully obvious to anyone who has done the research.

Still, my ex-partner, an expert on mystic artifacts, assures me that the suppression field will remain in place as long as the sword is not removed from its pedestal.

I, however, doubt that this will last.

-The Conductor of Hinatasou


It was a fairly normal day for Urashima Keitaro, manager of the Hinata Apartments. Naru had punched him through the ceiling for being a pervert, Mokoto smashed Keitaro through a wall with her sword after Kietaro complimented her figure, and Su had just finished using the manager as a test subject for her new "Mecha Tama Ultra Plus EX Attack Drone Squad MK. 3".

Just a normal day for Keitaro.

Today, Keitaro was cleaning the basement, in hopes that the girls wouldn't hit him anymore if he just left them alone.

Keitaro sighed. "Well, my life might not be pleasant, but at least it's interesting…"

The basement of the Hinata Apartments was crammed wall-to-wall with all sorts of junk. Granted, most of it was part of the nest of that giant metal-eating turtle robot Su had built a few months ago.

Still, there were plenty of old knick-nacks spread out in various piles throughout the basement. So far, he had found a SNES, a stack of old Batman comics, several dozen failed Mecha Tama-Chan prototypes, the world's eighth largest rubber band ball, picture of a sad clown, a wooden replica of The Lost Ark, a black case filled with Warhammer 40000 stuff, an old film canister with a zombie movie pictured on it, some creepy, gothic-lolita porcelain dolls, a clockwork orange, along with a large number of similarly robotic fruits, a copy of the Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy (the actual encyclopedia, not the novel), a fiendishly glowing puzzle cube, the real lost ark, a bowling trophy, an original copy of the united states constitution, a fake can of peanut brittle with a rubber snake on a spring, and a plastic magical girl rod.

"Boy, this is hard work." Keitaro sat down and leaned back on a nearby chair, "I think I'll just take a little-"

*CLICK*, Keitaro's chair accidently tripped a hidden switch on the wall, and a trap door instantly opened underneath him.

Keitaro screamed as he and the chair sided down the slanted passageway the trapdoor had opened up to. Then, he reached the bottom, and the chair fell over, flinging the unfortunate roinin halfway across the room.

"Ouch…" Kietaro said, landing face first on the hard cement floor.

He then got up and looked at his new surroundings. "Funny.", he said, "I don't remember THIS room…"

The room was mostly empty, featuring thick cement walls on every side. But at the end of the room, directly across from him, he saw a bright, glowing object.

The brown haired man put his glasses back on, and took a few steps closer to get a better look. He found that the bright, glowing object was a large sword-shaped thing made of crystal, standing on an ornate pedestal that was also made of a glowing crystal.

This puzzled Keitaro. Why would anyone make a sword made of crystal? It looked far to blunt to cut anything, and even though it might be heavy, a misplaced swing would be all it would take to shatter it.

Curious, he stepped closer still, reaching out to grab the blade by the hilt.

"I wouldn't do that, Keitaro." Said a voice from behind.

Keitaro turned to see his aunt Hiruka standing behind him. "O- Old lady?" he stammered.

*WHACK*

"Call me Hiruka-San." said the old lady Hiruka-san. She put her hammer back in the extra-dimensional space she found it in, and threw the unconscious destined wielder of the Soul Caliber over her shoulder.


That was... odd?

It gets better! I promise!