Drakken stared, flabbergasted, at the card that was in his hands. He turned it over and over with his fingers, feeling sweat trickle down his furrowed brows as he tried to make sense of what he had just read. Was he... Happy? Angry? Flattered? The mad scientist decided on confused, and briefly allowed the corner of his mouth to twitch. He opened the card once more and glanced at it.
A sudden 'BAM!' Snapped him out of his reverie, and Drakken dropped the paper in surprise. A stoic Shego stepped into his lair, removing her hand from the steel door handle.
"Shego!" He growled loudly. "How many times did I tell you to shut the door GENTLY?" His assistant merely scoffed and walked towards him.
"Only around a thousand times, Doctor Duh-rakken. Maybe if you actually change your wording, it'll actually stay in my head instead of me shutting your voice out the moment you start to say it."
Drakken did not bother arguing. Instead, he bent over, still seated in his chair, and retrieved the fallen card. Shego looked at him curiously, put off by the lack of response.
"Um, Doctor D? You okay?"
"I'm fine, Shego," came the dismissive reply, and Shego felt her temper (and consequently, her hands as well) start to flare. Why was he so aloof, all of a sudden? Noticing the white card in his hands, the villainess briefly wondered if he had received a bill of some sort. Only one way to find out, she told herself.
"Gotcha!" She announced triumphantly, swiftly grabbing the object from Drakken.
"Now let's see what's got you all miserable. I'm sure it can't be that ba—" Shego's mouth dropped open as she read the paper's contents.
Drakken grumbled and stood up. "That's why."
Shego's eyes quickly scanned the card again, checking to see if she had read it wrongly. But the writing was as plain as it could possibly be:
You have been formally invited to the wedding of Kim Possible and Ron Stoppable, who will be joined together on September 3, 2014 in the Middleton Chapel. The proceedings will begin promptly at 3:00 PM. The reception will be held in Jonava Hall, Maurie Hotel.
Below the message (which was written in elegant, curly font) was a picture of the engaged couple, looking cheerful in matching white outfits. Below their photograph was the word "RSVP", written in the same nauseating fancy fonts that would have had Shego rolling her eyes given any other circumstance.
However, this was unlike any other "sitch" (as Kimmie would have called it) she and Drakken had ever encountered.
Shego didn't know what to think. At all. She knew that Drakken was staring at her expectantly, waiting for her decision so that he would instantly agree to it.
"So... Are we going or not?" She tried to sound as casual as possible.
An hour later, Shego was fed up with Drakken's attitude.
"For Pete's sake, it's not as if Kimmie's asking you to give her away! Just decide already!" She yelled, and the Doctor ceased his pacing. He had been muttering to himself for a while, and Shego had grown impatient. She wanted him to decide, because she could not come up with any answer herself.
"Give her away?! Give her...! Do you not understand how this breaks all of the archfoe rules?! What were they thinking? Is this supposed to be some sort of prank, or clever trap to lure us in and send us to the slammer forever?"
After his rant, Drakken began muttering to himself once more. Shego caught brief snippets of "Never going back there... Lucre..." and massaged her temples exasperatedly.
"I don't think it's a trap. They're too goody-goody for that sort of thing. Though it sounds unusual and, well... Twisted, I think they're serious."
"Kim Possible and the buffoon getting married... In a way, I should have since the day I first met them. I have to admit, their friendship was something else. I never thought the buffoon would actually pull through, though."
"Puh-lease. Just cut the cheesy monologues and let's go already," Shego got up and placed her gloved hands on her hips.
"To get some proper clothes for the stupid wedding! Where else?! If we're going, we might as well dress decently or else they'll just kick us out. It's so obvious you want to go."
"W-what are you talking about? I was simply expressing interest... Yes! Interest! In the idea of going. In fact, we're only going because I'm actually curious as to what will happen, whether it's the real thing, or a trap, or a trap-trap, or—"
"Zip it." Shego grabbed his arm and pulled him in the direction of the lair's exit. She didn't want to admit it, but she wanted to go. She, too, was curious.
On the big day, the dynamic duo arrived at the chapel, Drakken in a black suit (he pulled at his collar nervously), and Shego in a long, dark green dress. Despite their efforts to follow the dress code, both of them still retained their usual skin colors and matching scowls on each of their faces.
They entered the chapel, and saw many of the wedding guests milling about, talking to one another and chatting amiably. Most of them, Drakken and Shego noticed, were people they themselves had captured at one point or another. Others, they recognized as allies of Kim Possible, who had helped thwart their world domination plans. The pair noted that they were the only enemies of Kim who were present, unless one counted the wife of Senior Senior Junior: a brown-haired girl who they knew had been a fellow cheerleader at Kim's school.
A dark-skinned, skinny man approached Drakken.
"Hey there! Friend of Kim's?"
"...Sort of," Shego replied awkwardly. She was immediately annoyed by the man's approach, and had to restrain herself from setting him on fire. The man laughed.
"Same here. Kim saved me once, or maybe twice? When I was kidnapped. People call me Rotiffle. You?"
"She saved us... When we were in a... Factory," Drakken lied through his teeth.
"Oh. That's good. I'm sorry she didn't get there in time to prevent your skin colors from getting changed in the accident, though." And with that, the man walked away to chat with some other guests. Drakken and Shego were about to attack him when--
"Well, well, well, look who decided to show up!" The villains turned around and went bug-eyed upon seeing Kim and Ron. Although both of them were taller (Ron especially), there hadn't been much physical change concerning the two when compared to their teenage days. Kim's hair was slightly longer, and Ron was now at least five inches taller than his wife-to-be (and slightly more muscular, to boot), but the faces that stared back at them were the same as they had always been. Ron had one arm wrapped around Kim's waist, and both of them were wearing casual outfits.
"I knew you guys would make it! Now Wade owes me ten bucks!" Kim laughed at her fiancé's words, all while smiling at the two villains.
Drakken and Shego were speechless. They didn't expect to be treated like... Like... Old friends. Allies. Inwardly, they both wanted to ask 'Why?' but were reluctant to. However, as if reading their minds, Kim continued.
"It was all Ron's idea, actually. I have to admit, I was reluctant at first. But he convinced me." Her sidekick relaxed his grip on her, as he walked to their archfoes, standing behind them. He then wrapped both of them in an open-armed hug, one hand on each of their shoulders.
"'Course I had to invite you guys! Even though you've caused us more injuries than a bugged up laser grid, we don't think any of this," he made a gesture to Kim. "...Would have been possible. You guys made it all happen!"
"We did?" They both said.
"Yeah! Thanks to your moodulator stealage, hostile Bueno Nacho takeover, and then that time you locked us in a room for three days with nothing other than a bed in it, and well, one thing lead to another..."
Everyone listening to Ron promptly blushed, especially Kim. She mouthed the letters 'TMI' to Shego, who nodded fervently.
"I'm saying, even villains deserve credit where credit is due!" The blonde man released his tight grip on both of them and slapped Drakken on the back appreciatively. The mad doctor winced.
"Well, aren't you afraid we're going to try something?" Shego asked, and Kim smirked at her – an expression that the super-powered female was most familiar with.
"Go ahead and try, Shego." The villainess accepted the challenged and proceeded to ignite her hands.
"Sorry, but I had Wade have this place wired so that no one in it has a strength, or power, of relatively high proportions. Gotta make sure that no one interrupts, after all," explained the red-head.
"Besides," Ron whispered in Shego's ear. "GJ is here too." He pointed at Dr. Director, and Shego was shocked to see the usually uptight leader of Global Justice wearing a blue gown instead of her typical military outfit. Her eyepatch was even in the same blue shade as her clothing.
"Good call," Drakken admitted softly.
"Well, I'm afraid we gotta jet," Ron announced, looking at his wristwatch. "I have to put on my suit, and help Kim put on her—"
The heroine glared at her husband-to-be.
"Ohhh yeah, I can't see you wearing the gown 'til the wedding! Heh heh. Seeya, Drakken. Seeya, Shego."
The couple departed, and all the evil duo could do was wave half-heartedly at them. They took that farewell as a cue to take their seats, and so they quietly slipped into the very last row, sitting down on a pew. With bated breaths, the villains waited. They were still too perplexed by the turn of events to act normally, or even speak to each other. Drakken fidgeted with his collar once more, and Shego cast furtive looks at other wedding guests.
After what seemed like hours, everyone sat down and someone who looked very much like an O Boyz band member began playing the organ. The tune of "Here Comes the Bride" resounded throughout the chapel, as the groom, the best man (his naked mole rat, figures, Drakken thought) and groomsmen (the nerdlinger, a man in a wheelchair and a bucktoothed, auburn-haired male) gathered in front of the altar.
The doors to the chapel soon opened with a creak, and in stepped Kim Possible, looking gorgeous in her silvery white gown. She had matching elbow-length gloves, and a diamond necklace hanging around her neck. The woman was blushing, but she maintained a bright smile on her face. One arm clutched that of her father's, as he walked down the aisle by her side.
From that point onwards, Drakken and Shego looked anywhere except at one another. Later on, they would both cheer and applaud when Kim and Ron kissed, and they would attend the reception and catch the bouquet and garter, but for the moment...
Both of them did not want to be seen with tears in their eyes.