If Wishes Were Horses
By Andie O'Neill
Summary: Sometimes the real thing can be better than the fantasy.
A/N: This is the result of watching WAY too many romantic movies, and listening to romantic songs.
Disclaimer: I don't own Eureka or any of it's characters.
He felt warm… but it wasn't the kind of warmth you feel when you're wrapped up in a warm blanket on a cold winter day. It was the kind that seeped into your bones and surrounded you. It was the kind that felt so amazing it could damn near break your heart. He'd been in relationships before where he was in love, but this was different. This love was more, was special in a way that not many would ever understand. The world faded away to nothing as he lived in the moment, and suddenly he felt like he could do anything… like he could travel through time. He saw them growing old together, saw long walks in the park holding hands, gentle kisses under moonlight… all the romantic crap he'd once rolled his eyes at. It was funny what falling in love could do to you.
Jack Carter took in a deep breath, closing his eyes as he let his lover surround him… memorizing every caress, every smell, and every feeling. It was amazing, this feeling… like being born to a whole new world. Like opening your eyes for the very first time. He'd never felt anything like it, and he didn't want it to end. "I could stay here forever," he whispered, moving even deeper into Nathan Stark's arms.
Nathan kissed his temple gently, tightening his hold on Jack. "Who says we can't?" he asked.
Jack laughed at the thought. If only it were possible that they could… possible that they could shut out the world and never look back. He didn't want to think about tomorrow… or even yesterday. He just wanted to live in this moment, this amazing moment where no one else existed but him and Nathan. "Everyone," he finally answered with a sad sigh.
Nathan shook his head, kissing Jack's neck. "There is no 'everyone,' Jack. There's just you… and me."
Jack was leaning against Nathan, lying between his legs, enjoying the feeling of being surrounded by his lover as they sat in the grass under a random tree they'd found. It was incredible… how Nathan could make him feel so alive, make him feel so much… anger, jealousy, love, hate, pain, pleasure, and everything in between. This was a man he could fight with one minute, and kiss senseless the next. A man that could drive him to insanity, only to pull him back from the breaking point with a simple touch or reassuring look. "I keep expecting to wake up…" he admitted sadly.
Nathan let out a slow breath. "I know."
"Promise to be there when I do?" he asked, turning his head to look into Nathan's soft green eyes.
Nathan smiled, leaning forward to kiss his lips. "I'm not going anywhere, Jack. You and me… we're forever."
Jack closed his eyes once more, wishing Nathan's words could be true… that they really could last forever. "Nothing lasts that long."
"Love has lasted thousands of years, Jack. It never goes away… not even when you wake up."
Jack smiled; turning back around to watch the sun go down, content to be in Nathan's arms. "I love you, Nathan Stark."
"I love you, Jack Carter."
Jack blinked his eyes, opening him for the first time in what felt like far too long. It took him a moment to realize a single tear was falling down his face, and he had no time to wipe it away before it could be noticed.
"Carter? You okay?" asked Allison, her eyes revealing her worry as she laid a hand on his shoulder. "What did you see? Did it work?"
Sheriff Carter stood, taking a step away from the machine as he wiped his eyes, trying to figure out what'd happened. "I… I'm not sure what happened," he admitted, his voice rough with emotion.
Henry walked up from behind his desk. "It's similar to Beverly's device, the one you were trapped in last year… only its main focus is to fulfill dreams, fantasies. I suppose it can be a bit overwhelming at first."
Jack rubbed his face, trying to break from the spell of the very real imagine still lodged in his brain of a life he would never have. Just as he was about to speak the door opened once more, and the man he couldn't break free from walked through the door with his usual air of superiority. "How'd the test go?"
Henry's eyes never left Jack as he spoke. "The data's on my laptop. I'll send you all the information as soon as I've had a chance to go through it. It looks like it was a success."
"Really? How you feeling, Carter? You look like hell for someone who's just experienced their deepest fantasy," said Stark, folding his arms as he stared at Jack like a puzzle he was trying to solve. "What happened?"
Jack shifted nervously under his gaze. "I um… I… I gotta go," he finally said and left the room in a hurry, unable to take the emotions that washed over him anymore. It really had been a dream… a stupid, pathetic dream! He didn't want to think about it. Damn machine. He'd spent the last two years pretending that Nathan Stark meant nothing to him, and all his hard work had been erased with the help of one damn machine.
Nathan stared at the machine, back against the wall as he thought about the look in Carter's eyes. He'd never seen it before… so vulnerable. He'd looked almost lost, and Nathan couldn't stop thinking about it. With a sigh he pushed away from the wall and walked over to Henry's laptop, turning on the device. His heart was beating faster and faster as he walked toward the chair and sat down, letting his head lie against the head rest and he closed his eyes and surrendered. He knew the fantasy had been saved to the device. He wouldn't be able to let go until he knew what had affected Jack Carter so. And maybe he'd know what to do.
In seconds the world faded away and when he opened his eyes he could see a beautiful sunset as he sit under a random tree, feeling the breeze hit his skin. It took him a moment to realize his arms were wrapped around another… but not just anyone. Nathan didn't bother to pull away, something that surprised even him. Jack breathed in deep, looking more content than Nathan had ever seen him. "I could stay here forever," Jack whispered to him. And suddenly Nathan understood. He understood the look in Jack's eyes, the red that indicated tears, and the pain he'd seen in those beautiful blues. Nathan tightened his hold on the smaller man, kissing his temple gently, embracing the warmth that surrounded him immediately… the kind of warmth that seeped into your very soul.
"Who says we can't?"
Jack smiled, letting the gentle rhythm of Nathan's heart beat sooth him, resting his head against the scientist's chest. He didn't want to leave… didn't want to fall asleep, afraid he'd awake once more to learn once again that he was just dreaming some fantasy his mind had conjured up to torture him with. His heart wouldn't be able to take it a second time. He could feel Nathan's hand on his back, drawing random circles and shapes on his skin, and the warm sensation he'd felt in his fantasy returned.
"So… is it everything you dreamed it would be?" Nathan asked him with an amused smile.
Jack would have rolled his eyes if the man underneath him didn't look so absolutely beautiful. Suddenly he was reminded of every horrible romantic movie Zoe had ever forced him to watch. "Nope… it's better."
Nathan chuckled, groaning. "If we start spouting poetry I'm paying Lupo to shoot us both."
Jack laughed along with him, finally closing his eyes. "That's what happens when you fall in love, Nathan."
He waited for the smart remark… something, but no words ever came. Instead Nathan moved two fingers to Jack's chin, forcing him to open his eyes and lift his head, and their lips met in a gentle kiss. Nathan pulled away a moment later, his head falling back against the pillow. "I love you too, Jack."
Jack smiled wide, lying his head back down over Nathan's heart. If this really was just another fantasy, he hoped to God he never woke up….