Okay, so you probably won't get this if you haven't heard about Twilight, which means you've been living under a rock for awhile...(not like I've read the darn book, but whatever...)

Edit (5/25/10): I would like to thank Orange Singer for his/ her review, now I know that Edward Cullen is about 6'2". Obviously he towers over Ed, who's barely 5' when you don't include the antenna.


"Winry?" No answer. "Win~ry?" No answer. "Winry Rockbell?" Edward Elric walked up behind Winry, who was seated in a large armchair, about halfway through reading a thick paperback. He crept up behind her and peered over her shoulder.

"Whatchya reading?" Ed asked, poking her several times. She continued to ignore him. Finally he grabbed the book from her.

"Hey! Edward!" Lacking a large wrench to beat him with, Winry stood up and put her hands on her hips just as any regular girl would.

"Twi-light?" Ed read slowly as he dangled the book in from of his face. "What the hell is a Twilight?" He began to flip through it.

"Ed, I wouldn't..." warned Winry, but Ed ignored her and continued flipping.

"Edward!" Ed stopped flipping and wrenched the book open, nearly cracking the spine. "What is this...Edward Cullen?"

"When it comes to romantic fictional vampires, he's the dreamiest one around..." Winry replied with a far-off and very in love look.

"Of course," Ed sighed. "Well, he's definitely got the name going for him. Everyone knows just being an Edward adds like, fifteen thousand points to your awesomeness score. But what's he got that I don't got?"

"Well, he's strong."

"Alchemy makes up for that!"

"He's fast."

"That too!"

"He's a vampire."

"I'm in the military; it's almost the same..."

"And he sparkles."


"He sparkles."



"Well...I'm half metal. Shine enough light on me and I'm bound to sparkle!"


"There's only one thing that matters!" Ed interrupted, accentuating his statement with a pointed finger. He rushed over to the computer and began to look something up on the internet in a fit of very typical Edward Elric rage. Several minutes later he collapsed on the floor, landing in a fetal position. Just then, Al walked into the room.

"Big brother, you alright? Did you break your auto-mail? Did Winry beat you with a wrench for breaking your auto-mail?"

"I did no such thing!" Winry protested.

"He's..." Ed mumbled.

"He's saying something," Al noticed. Winry giggled.

"Ed, are you crying?"

"He's...he's..." Ed continued to mumble, still on the floor. "He's tall!"

(a/n) I admit that I don't now how tall EC is, but chances are he's taller than Ed...
Reviews are highly appreciated...but please be critical, even though it's a oneshot.