The Secret of Old Married Couples

AN: I don't own Harry Potter.
And I don't ship; I sink ships.
You've been warned.



Why does no one ever realize that fighting like an old married couple does not signal the potential for a loving and long lasting relationship? Hermione had just finished another argument with her fiancé over the stupidest subject:

The color of the tablecloths at their wedding.

Hermione was trying to convince Ron that day-glow orange tablecloths were not appropriate for their reception. The argument got them no where, of course, but their arguments were never productive.

Hermione glanced around the public bathroom to make sure no one was in it, locked the door, set up silencing charms, and screamed until she was seeing rainbow spots dancing in front of her face.

At Hogwarts, everyone assumed that she and Ron would get together because they fought 'like an old married couple.' After a few years of peer pressure she actually started to believe it was a good idea.

And now she's marrying the stupid, self-centered, egotistical, pompous git.

She screamed again before taking off the silencing charms and unlocked the door. Why? Why did everyone think it was a good idea? Why did she think it was a good idea?

The more she thought about it, the more she realized that those old married couples were miserable. They were old!

Well, being old wasn't the reason they were miserable. The reason they were miserable is because they were married to someone that they constantly fought with, day in and out.

Old married couples were married way back in their early twenties, back in the fifties, or sixties, or even seventies. These old married people grew up in a society that preached divorce was unacceptable, amoral, and sinful.

They were miserable with their mate because they didn't want to be with their mate.

Merlin, how she empathized with them.

It seemed as if the only time she and Ron were not fighting was when they were 'making love.' Was 'making love' even the correct term in their case?

She shook her head. Of course it made sense. She was marrying him. She wanted to marry him.

Didn't she?

After all, their sex lives were pretty good. Grant it, Ron did sometimes forget to help her out, as it were, but the arguments were sexual frustration, wasn't it?

No. God no.

She didn't feel aroused at any point during or after an argument with Ron. If anything, arguing with the git meant that she lost any inclination she might have had to jump into his bed and fly without a broom.


How did she get to this point in her life? She was planning her wedding with an immature Quidditch fanatic whom she didn't love.

She didn't love him.


Who would have thought that it was the day-glow orange tablecloths he showed up with to get her to really think about her feelings for him?

She'd be damned if she continued with this wedding. She had a lot of phone calls to make after she was able to speak with Ron again.

But she would sooner become the Dark Lady Granger before she would become one half of those typical old married couples.

AN: Review?