Interview with a Freshie, Part 2

INTERVIEWER: Hi. We're back with Lucky Alexander, a woman who has been telling us about a rather unique lifestyle, and we'll be ready to take some calls in just a minute. For those of you who are just joining us, Ms. Alexander makes her living by feeding blood to a vampire.

LUCKY: Umm, wait, that's not quite right. I don't consider that to be how I "make my living."

INTERVIEWER: But you do feed a vampire?

LUCKY: Yes, I do.

INTERVIEWER: And you indicated earlier that you live in his house?

LUCKY: That's true. When I first started feeding this vampire exclusively, I still had my own apartment, still had a day job. But you know, he keeps pretty strange hours, and eventually it became easier just to move in. He was worried about me being out in the city late at night. And sometimes, after you give blood, you get a little faint. I was staying over at the house pretty often anyway.

INTERVIEWER: So moving in was mostly practical. Let's take our first call. Hello, you're on the air.

Caller 1: Calling with an observation, question ... this is really very interesting. Your vampire sounds like a caring person. I wanted to ask if you get paid for doing this. Maybe not you personally, but some of the girls.

LUCKY: Some do. There are freshies in this town that make a very good living, feeding strictly on a pay basis. And as for myself, to be honest, I do get an allowance. But I wouldn't do it just for the money. I know a lot more freshies who are in it for the kick, or the chance to be close to some very sexy guys.

INTERVIEWER: So they are sexy? The vampires?

LUCKY: Oh, yes. Devastatingly. Some more than others, of course, but most are beyond description. Fascinating creatures.

Caller 1: Still, pardon me, but it seems a little mercenary.

LUCKY: Well, is it mercenary to let your date pay for dinner? Or, I know it's not the same level of legal commitment, but, is a housewife mercenary?

Caller 1: Yes, but--

INTERVIEWER: Okay. I think we can move on. Let's take another call. Hello?

Caller 2: Does it bother you you're going to burn in hell for feeding an undead monster?

INTERVIEWER: I'm sorry, that's just not appropriate. I'm going to go to the next--

LUCKY: I really would like to say something to that last caller. That question really can't be answered. For one, he's not a monster, and for another, he's one of the most alive people I've ever met. It would be more evil not to feed him, as far as I can tell. As far as burning in hell goes, well, I think we have different beliefs. But I appreciate your concern.

INTERVIEWER: All right, then, caller, you're on.

Caller 3: This sounds kind of silly, but, do vampires prefer one blood type over another?

LUCKY: They do have preferences, but most seem to be more concerned with the donor being willing, and some other factors. I've heard that some find their own blood type most nourishing. And there seems to be a market for the rarer blood types, as well. An AB negative can have vamps lining up down the block. But even those of us with more plebeian blood types can get plenty of attention.

Caller 3: Okay, thanks.

INTERVIEWER: All right, let's take another call. Caller, go ahead with your question.

Caller 4: Hello? Someone there? Oh, sorry. Yeah, well, ahm, I wanted to ask a question. So. Hmm, Miss Alexander, I just want to know, how do you meet a vampire to become a freshie? I mean, obviously they stay secret, but they must have their sources. I guess you are not allowed to say much about that, but still. Ahem. Is there some kind of job description or something?

LUCKY: You know, you probably have already met a vampire, and just never knew it. I met my first vamp in a bookstore. Who knew? I'm not sure I'd recommend to anyone that they take up being a freshie…it's not necessarily safe.

Caller 4: Yeah, but you haven't said much about that part. Aren't the vampires careful, these days?

LUCKY: Most are. There are a lot who don't even feed fresh, any more. Nevertheless, you have to be really careful who bites you, because they can lose control and take too much. I've nearly lost friends that way. And I think almost every freshie I know has had a vamp get too into the feeding, and that can be dangerous.

INTERVIEWER: Has that happened to you?

LUCKY: Yes. Not my vampire, of course, he's very controlled. But I was attacked once, and nearly killed.

INTERVIEWER: That sounds like quite a story. Can you tell us more?

LUCKY: Not a lot to tell. I was in the wrong place at the wrong time, and fortunately, someone else was there to intervene. He quite literally saved my life. But it was very scary, and it took me a long time to recover from it. And a lot of help from my friends.

INTERVIEWER: Yet you stayed close to the vampires. That seems like asking for trouble. What about the one who attacked you? Aren't you afraid he'll come back?

L (pauses): He's—I have it on good authority he's moved on. And I'm rather well protected, these days.

INTERVIEWER: Cryptic. I like it. All right, we have another caller for our woman of mystery…

Caller 5: Ummm...Hello? Ummm...I have a question for Lucky? Ummm...Hi. Okay, I'm a fairly new Freshie, I've only met two vamps and only been bitten once. For me, it was kinda uncomfortable...before the bite I mean. When I see a vamp 'vamp out' as you say, I tend to freak out. For some reason the eyes and the fangs scare me. I have no idea why. The bite itself...all I have to say is...WOW. it normal to freak out like that, and how do I get over my slight fear? Also, how do you get over the whole jealousy thing, because I'm just a very jealous person by nature.

LUCKY: That's about five questions there, I'll try to answer as much as I can. For one thing, if you're freaking out, that's about the worst thing you can do. You have to remember, the vampires are predators by nature…I think the term is really apex predator, because they are the top of the food chain, and they know that. And if you panic, or struggle, that just brings out the prey drive instinct. They tell me you can get dead that way. So if I were you, I'd work very hard at not panicking. More experience with the right vamp will probably fix it. Or else walk away from the whole deal…I think you need to ask yourself if being a freshie is really what you want. Even if you love the bite, it may not be the best thing for you.

Caller 5: Okay, that's something to think about. But what about the jealousy?

LUCKY: You know, that's another thing that you really need to get over. Most of the vamps simply won't put up with it. If I said I was never jealous, I'd be lying. I'm jealous all the time, and my vampire knows about it. But I'm also really, really careful not to act on it. Look, it boils down to this. If you're an exclusive, it's like you've made this commitment to put the vamp's needs ahead of your own. He's going to have to have more than one donor, or else he'd kill you in about a week. He doesn't want that any more than you do. So you have to accept that he's going to have multiple freshies. And that whatever attention you get from him is what you get. People go on about a "harem mentality," but the truth is that there can't really be one or even two favorites. A smart vampire, and believe me the ones powerful enough to afford exclusives are smart, is going to set up a feeding rotation for his girls that keeps all of them healthy. In fact, if he really cares about a freshie, he may actually feed from her less than the others, because he wants her company more than her blood.

INTERVIEWER: Caller, let me ask you something. Ms. Alexander has said, and you've said, that the bite is very pleasurable. How does that work?

Caller 5: You mean, like where do they bite? Or what does it feel like?

INTERVIEWER: Either. Whatever you care to tell us.

Caller 5: I've mostly been bitten on the wrist. I know it doesn't sound that sexy, but there's this feeling that just kind of starts from the fangs, and radiates out all over you. It's amazing.

LUCKY: It's really hard to describe. I don't know how they do it, but the fangs don't hurt that much, just a little shock, and then when they drink the blood, you can just feel it all over. Amazing is a good word.

INTERVIEWER: That raises another question I think everyone is interested in. From your experience of the bite, it sounds pretty sexual, and I'm guessing it is for the vampires, also. Do vampires have what we think of as regular sex?

LUCKY: As I understand it, yes. I haven't experienced that. And I have been told that they tend to—bite down when they do. That might be a little kinky, but I suppose you could call it regular sex.

INTERVIEWER: Interesting. I see we have another caller. Santa Monica, go ahead.

Caller 6: Ms Alexander, you mentioned that a lot of freshies meet vampires at a club or party. Well, if you've just found out about this life style and don't have any friends of friends how do you know where to go? I looked in the yellow pages and I didn't see a single vampire night club listed. Is there a secret code or should I just go to every club in town with a Bite Me sign?

LUCKY: Yeah, it's not really publicized. If I were you, I'd do some googling. I can't tell you the names of the freshie clubs, I'm sorry. I think if you know such things exist, you can find one. It'll take a little work.

Caller 6: Can't you give us a hint?

LUCKY: No, sorry, but you're going to have to work it out yourself.

INTERVIEWER: We have time for a couple more quick calls. Caller, do you have a short question?

Caller 7: Umm, yes. So do "freshies" ever go stale? I mean, is there some age limit?

LUCKY: Well, not exactly, but most freshies seem to be ready to move on by the time they get to be about 30. I've known a few older ones. It's unusual, though.

Caller 7: So, don't you feel like you have an expiration date stamped on your forehead.

LUCKY: Honestly, yes. And that's not the pleasantest feeling. But most of us try and make the most of the time we have with our vampires.

INTERVIEWER: Wow. Let's take one more caller.

Caller 8 (a male voice): Lucky. Hungry. Now.

LUCKY: You know, it's been great, but I have to go.


LUCKY: Yes. Thank you for having me. Goodnight.

INTERVIEWER: Thanks for being here. Folks, I have to tell you, I wish we were on video right now, because I've never seen a smile like this woman has on her face right now. Be sure and tune in tomorrow night, we're going to be talking with Ben Miller, the author of Sasquatch, a riveting tale about his encounters with Bigfoot in the forests of Washington State. Goodnight, and remember, the world is stranger than we realize.