Title: Pensamientos de un Pollo Loco

Author: Ashantai

E-Mail: ashantai@hotmail.com

Archive: Please ask!

Category: Max/Ben sibling relationship

Rating: G

Spoilers: Pollo Loco major spoilers

Summary: Max and Ben's thoughts during their last scene together in "Pollo Loco"

Disclaimer: I don't own Max or Ben or Dark Angel (I wish!!) but I like to watch them on tv. :)

Author's Notes: My first DA fic. Please R/R! Also, it's pretty obvious but I'll say it anyway: Ben's thoughts aren't in italics, Max's are. Enjoy!


I wanted so much to be a good soldier.

I try so hard.

Don't cry, Ben.

Maxie, I'm sorry.

You used to love me. But why did you do this to my leg? Why do you want to hurt me?

No, you didn't want to hurt me, did you, not really. I understand.

I still love you.

I know. That's why you were always different.

I didn't mind staying up to give you shadow puppet shows.

I miss your smile; when we were little everything was simpler.

I wish we were still in Manticore.

Don't say that.

It's true. Everything made sense there.

No. Nothing did.

I didn't do this to hurt you. I did it to save you.

I did it to save all of us.

If I didn't do it then the Blue Lady would have abandoned us.

I wasn't strong enough; none of us were. Eva and Jack weren't.

Eva died protecting me.

She died because we were weak.

Jack died because they couldn't handle imperfection.

He died because we didn't see what the Blue Lady wanted us to.

They threw him to the nomlies. I'm so sorry; I didn't know what she wanted then. But now I do.

She isn't real, Ben.

Don't say that! She's real.

We made her up. You did.

This isn't my fault.

You're the one killing these people.

I'm doing it for her; for us.

I did this to make the Blue Lady stronger. I did it to save you all.

Yes, I understand. But that doesn't mean I'm like you, Ben. And it doesn't make it right.

Where was Zack when I needed him? I can't function without guidelines! I need discipline!

This world doesn't make sense like I thought it would.

We're not in Manticore anymore. We can't keep living by their rules. We don't have to.

I'm not; I'm living by mine.


I love you, Max.

Oh, Ben, I know.

Do you? Good, because I don't have much time left.

Don't talk like that, Ben. Get up.

I can't; you know that. Max, you have to help me.

Get up!

I can't! Please, Maxie, they'll put me in with the nomlies!

I thought you weren't a nomlie.

I'm not! But they think I am. They don't understand about the Blue Lady.

They don't believe.

Neither do I.

I love you, Max.

I know. But why didn't you grow up, Ben? The rest of us did. Why were you different?

I was special. The Blue Lady had other plans for me.

Help me, Maxie.

You're still a child, still afraid of the nomlies. But they're not real; don't you see that?

They are real! And you would have been caught and given to them if I hadn't helped you!

By killing people?

Yes. She needed strength.



Maxie, please, they're coming!

I can't.

Please help me!

You're my brother; I can't.

I love you, Max, please.

Ben, don't. Get up!

I can't get up! Please, Max.

No, no, no, no...

Maxie... I'm so sorry.

Ben, tell me a story. You always told the best stories.

About what?

About the Good Place.

Where no one ever gets punished...

And no one gets yelled at.

And nobody ever disappears.

You used to tell me jokes, Ben, do you remember, sometimes when they let us sleep in?

Yes, I remember.

Max, did you know that in the Good Place when you wake up in the morning you can stay in bed as long as-

I love you, Ben. Sleep well.