Ensign Callahan took out his tricorder and scanned the blue box.
It was nine feet tall, bright blue, and it seemed to be giving off some sort of chronoton energy. He tapped his combadge to give a full report.
"Callahan to Tuvok," he said. "The temporal distortion appears to be emanating from a blue box, in Cargo Bay Two."
"Can you be more specific as to the nature of the object?" Tuvok asked, and Callahan had to suppress the urge to sigh.
"It's nine feet tall, bright blue, it has what appears to be a lamp on top of it, and it has a sign in… in English!" Callahan stopped in his tracks. "There's no way that's possible!"
"What does the sign say?" Tuvok asked.
"It says… 'Police Public Call Box, sir," Callahan said. "What does it mean?"
"Seven of Nine is on her way," Tuvok replied. "Keep guard on the … 'Police Public Call Box,' until she arrives."
"Aye sir," Callahan said, taking his phaser out. This was too weird. How could something with an English sign be here?
A moment later, something clicked on the box. He stepped back and aimed his phaser at it, warily. Then, one of the doors opened and a man popped his head out of the door – a young man, apparently human, with long brown hair and sideburns.
"Trust me Martha," he was saying. "The Federation of the 24th century were a much nicer bunch than the second Earth Empire…"
"I hope so!" a female voice said from behind him. "They put me in bloody chains!"
"Well," the Doctor said amicably. "I'm sure they didn't mean anything by it. Oh, hello!" he said, noticing Callahan. The bemused Ensign did nothing. "You must be the welcoming committee!" the man continued, oblivious to the Ensigns befuddlement. "I'm the Doctor, and this," indicating a younger, dark skinned and quite pretty woman, "is Martha Jones."
"Hi!" she said, waving awkwardly. Callahan felt the absurd urge to wave back, but then aimed his phaser at the 'Doctor' who appeared to be the man in charge.
"Oh, there's no need for that," the Doctor aid, smiling. "I'm quite friendly. So is Martha, mind you, not saying she isn't."
"Oi," Martha said, nudging his ribs. "Sorry, he always confuses people."
"Well," he countered, looking at the walls, and noticing the Borg alcove. A look of deadly seriousness came upon his face.
"Oh dear," he said. "That's not good."
"What is that?" Martha asked. The Doctor didn't reply, but instead grabbed Callahan and looked him dead in the eye.
"What," he said after a moment, "is a Borg alcove doing on a Federation ship?"
"I require it," came a steady female voice. Seven of Nine entered the room, and Callahan could not suppress his sigh of relief – she would sort these two nutters out.
The Doctor stared at the ex-drone for a long moment, and she stared at him. Then she looked at the blue box. Then back at the Doctor.
"What are you doing here?" she asked.
"I might ask you the same question," he said, warily.
"You know her?" Martha said, shocked.
"Vaguely," the Doctor said, but didn't elaborate. "Now, you might want to take me to Captain Janeway. I have a bad feeling that she'll need my help, very, very soon…"