The Misadventures of Three Angels
Summary: This story was actually written as a joke for some friends of mine on another site about 2 years ago. It is a major AU and is shameless. Basically this is what would happen if a bunch of Star Wars fangirls somehow got the opportunity to walk into the Jedi Temple and take a tour of it. I did not originally post it over here because there are some inside jokes (like Angel=fangirl, and other misc items) that not everyone will get, but I've had a bunch of people tell me they like to laugh at the "Angels" antics regardless. Since most of my stories are a bit dark as of late, I thought something humorous might be in order. However you have been warned, this is not what I usually write, this is a bit warped, twisted, and insane.
Just an FYI... None of the angels have names, just numbers to distinguish one from the other. Two are Anakin Fangirls, and One is an Obi-Wan fangirl.
Time Frame: Clone Wars
Disclaimer: I do not own Star Wars. I'm just borrowing George Lucas' characters for a bit.
The Clone Wars was a trying time for the Jedi. The longer it dragged on the more their favor in the eyes of the galaxy's citizens was diminished. To boost public relations the Jedi had opened up the Temple for tours to civilians. Having only been able to see their favorite Jed in holo pictures, three intrepid friends, collectively known as the Angels, decided to take their chances and join the tour. They were not sure if "The Negotiator" and "The Hero With No Fear" were out on a mission, but they hoped they would catch a brief glimpse of them. If nothing else, just being at the place where they lived was an exciting prospect.
It was a sunny day on Coruscant as the three Angels entered the main lobby of the Jedi Temple with a large group of other civilians.
"Welcome all! Come in and we shall start the tour!" A young Jedi female called out. She was dressed in crème colored Jedi robes. The hood of her cloak was pushed back to show off the tight bun that held her auburn hair out of her face. "My name is Jedi Knight Eriana Selland and I will be leading your tour today. I will be taking you through a Jedi's daily routine in the Temple. We shall see the main living quarters, training facilities, and meditation chambers. I will also be leading you to the Jedi Council Chambers. I will provide details to everything we see today, but if there are any questions, feel free to ask."
As soon as Knight Eriana finished talking, Angel #1 frantically waved her hand in the air with a question.
"Yes." Knight Eriana acknowledged the woman.
"Is Anakin Skywalker in the Temple today?"
Next to her, Angel #2 stared up with interest at the Jedi Knight waiting for an answer, while Angel #3 rolled her eyes at the completely unsubtle question.
Catching her friend's expression at her questions, Angel #1 added, "Oh… And Obi-Wan Kenobi?" She smiled when she noticed Angel #3 had turned her attention to Knight Eriana intently waiting for a reply.
Knight Eriana kept her face calm as she said. "Knight Skywalker and Master Kenobi have been out in the Outer Rim for months. However, we may see other Jedi along the way. Now are there any other questions before we begin?"
The faces of the three Angels fell in disappointment at the news that the Jedi they most wanted to see were not around. All three had figured they would be gone, but they had all hoped that by some stroke of luck they could see Skywalker and Kenobi.
Seeing no raised hands, Eriana stated, "Good now let's begin. You are standing in the main level of the Temple, which was built…."
The tour through the Temple was interesting if you wanted to see architecture and Jedi life, but mildly boring if you were an Angel. However, the three Angels conceded that was probably due to their disappointment from earlier. They now walked at the back of the crowd, as the tour continued.
"Down that hall are the apartments for the Jedi living in the Temple. Masters and Padawans live together, but once a padawan is knighted they are given their own living space. Now if you all will follow me, we shall go to the Council Chambers." Eriana stated.
As the Jedi Knight turned to lead the way, Angel #1 tugged on her companions arms.
"What?" The other Angels asked in unison.
"Look, there are names listed on the doors."
"So?" Angel #2 asked in response.
"Well we can find Skywalker and Kenobi's living quarters and at least say we've been there."
"We can't do that. We'll get caught!" Angel #2 whispered.
"No we won't, with the war going on there is barely anyone around." The ambitious Angel #1 answered her friend.
"Besides, it is afternoon all Jedi in the Temple are training." Angel #3 added, wondering if Kenobi's quarters would be next to Skywalker's.
"But…" Angel #2 began.
"Come on!" Her two friends shouted, tugging at her arms as they dragged her down a long corridor. Both scanning the walls for the names of their favorite Jedi.
Now that they were moving down the hall the Angel who had initially come up with this scheme giggled as she said, "Maybe we can get a souvenir. I need some more towels!"
Despite her anxiety, Angel #2 giggled in response. However as she was always the voice of reason, she added, "You are going to get us in trouble!"
Next to Angel #1, Angel #3 rolled her eyes as she retorted to Angel #1's comment as well, "What is your thing with towels belonging to Jedi Knights?"
"Oh, get off it." Angel #1 brushed her friend's comment aside while continuing to move down the hall. "We'll find you one from Kenobi's room."
Unable to dissuade her fellow Angels from their search for Skywalker and Kenobi's rooms, Angel #2 followed her friends. Someone had to keep an eye out on the other two. A certain fan fiction writer would be unhappy with her if she let her fellow Angels get in trouble. The Angels were supposed to look out for one another.
Angel #2's half-hearted hope that Skywalker's room would be down some other part of the Temple was short lived when she heard Angel #1 squeal. "There it is!"
"Shhh!" Angel #3 shouted just as loudly as Angel #1. Angel #1 and 2 both broke into a fit of giggles in response to Angel #3's horrible attempt to quiet them. Angel #2 might have been reluctant to begin this journey, but she could not help but feel giddy at the sight of Anakin's name on his door. None of the angels were being discreet.
Angel #1 beamed at the door and immediately moved to it to push it open, but it did not budge.
"See, it is locked. Now can we go?" Angel #2 asked, looking left and right down the hall. A part of her wanted to stay, but her sensible side told her the Angels were pressing their luck. "We shouldn't be down here and I'm sure with all the noise you two have made someone will find us. You've seen the door, let's go."
"Don't be silly." Angel #3 said. "Where is your sense of adventure? We've gotten this far, lets see what is inside."
"But it's locked!" Angel #2 protested. As she made this statement, Angel #1 was running her finger tips along the edges of the door looking for anything that would release it.
"You can't use the Force to open it, you aren't a Jedi!" Angel #2 added.
"Wait!" Angel #3 stated, gaining an idea from Angel #1's action. "I need a thin piece of metal. Anyone got anything on them?"
All the angels started patting their pockets and rummaging through their purses.
"Nothing." Angel #1 said sullenly.
"Me neither. Can we go?" Angel #2 added.
"Wait! I forgot… my necklace!" Angel #3 immediately brought her hands behind her neck and undid the clasp to her necklace. "This is metal, but I need something that I can wrap it around so I can thread it through the door jam."
"I've got a piece of paper, we can scrunch it into the shape you need!" Angel #1 stated happily as she realized their adventure could continue.
Angel #2 looked on with disbelief as she watched Angel #3 wrap her necklace around the piece of paper and slide it around the door jam. Angel #2 was in even more shocked when Angel #3 managed to hit something in the door jam that triggered the lock and released the door.
"How did you know that would work?" Angel #2 asked in disbelief.
Angel #3 shrugged as Angel #1 bounded happily into the room. "It is in the sixth film to my second favorite holovid franchise?"
"Second favorite?" Angel #2 asked while walking into the room after Angel #1.
Angel #3 shrugged again. "It would be my first favorite, but they didn't cast the actor I wanted."
Angel #2 rolled her eyes at this, but quickly scanned the room. She still had misgivings, but she couldn't help but smile at the fact that she was standing in Anakin's room.
Upon entering Anakin's room, Angel #1 threw herself onto his bed, spreading her arms out as she rested on his pillows. "This is where he sleeps." She sighed dreamily. "It still smells like him."
Angel #3 was forced to stifle her laughter. "How would you know what he smells like? You've only seen pictures of him."
"I can imagine." Angel #1 stated snidely.
"Will you two quiet down and finish your snooping, we need to get out of here." Angel #2 warned even though she was running her fingertips over the cloaks hanging in Anakin's open closet.
"Not until we see Ken…. Wait, do you hear that?" Angel #3 asked as she looked at a side door in Anakin's room that none of the Angel's had seen previously.
In answer to her question, the door slid open revealing a very wet Jedi Knight, a white towel wrapped around his waist and another one in his hands that he was using to dry his sandy blonde hair.
Angel #1 and #2's jaws dropped in awe at the sight of the handsome Jedi while Angel #3 was distracted by the sound of a cultured accent behind her.
"Anakin! What is going on here?" Jedi Master Obi-Wan Kenobi asked.
"Huh?" Anakin asked, letting the hands holding his second towel to rest at his side. It was at that time he noticed two women giggling madly as they stared at his nearly naked form. Angel #2 knew they were in trouble, but she didn't care for the consequences. The sight of Anakin Skywalker walking out from the shower was enough to make up for any punishment they would face later.
Not interested in Anakin, Angel #3's eyes were locked on the Jedi of her heart's desires. She was frozen in place by his strong presence.
"Fan girls!" Obi-Wan barked. "How did they get in here?"
Anakin shrugged. "I'm not sure Master."
"Well they should not be here. Ladies, I must ask that you leave. Anakin already has an over inflated opinion of himself, he does not need you to help increase it." Obi-Wan stated.
Anakin cast an offended glance at Obi-Wan. "I do not!"
Obi-Wan waved off the impending argument. "It does not matter, you should not have three of your fan girls in your room."
"Two Master." Anakin corrected, smiling when he noticed Angel 3's gaze was locked on Obi-Wan. Obi-Wan never had as many fan girls as Anakin, and the younger Jedi knew it bothered his Master, even though he would never admit to it. For his part, Anakin did not need the fan girls, the only person he wanted to impress was Padmé, but he did enjoy the attention.
"Three, Anakin. There are three ladies in your room." Obi-Wan stated rolling his eyes as he gestured towards Angel #3.
"Yes, but she…" Anakin gestured to Angel #3, "Is your fan girl."
Obi-Wan blinked in surprise as he turned and looked at Angel #3 and realized with delighted surprise that she seemed hypnotized by his mere presence. Although he always tried to keep control over his emotions, he could not help but feel a sense of honor that this woman had focused her attention on him instead of his padawan. Obi-Wan rarely saw his fans as they were fewer in number, and it was nice to finally meet one. Obi-Wan smiled at Angel #3, causing the Angel to blush crimson as she averted her gaze shyly.
Anakin cast a knowing smile at Obi-Wan before looking at the chrono and jumped with surprise when he realized if he wasn't quick he was going to be late for his rendezvous with Padmé. Thinking fast, Anakin flashed a roguish smile at the two Angels, who were giggling madly as they drooled over his appearance. "Well, you did manage to make your way here without getting caught. No other fan girls have done that. I think that deserves a reward."
Anakin threw the towel in his hands to Angel #1 who squealed in delight as she held the damp cloth close to her.
On the other side of the room, Obi-Wan had gently taken Angel #3's hand in his and placed a polite kiss on the back of it. "It is a pleasure to meet you, milady." He stated. For her part, Angel #3 was finding it difficult to breathe as she concentrated on standing as her knees tried to buckle underneath her.
Angel #1 and #2 did quit breathing when Anakin said, "Now for you." Gesturing towards Angel #2 as he started peeling off the towel around his waist so he could give it to her.
Noticing what was happening. "Obi-Wan turned sharply to his padawan. "Anakin!" He warned.
"All right." Anakin sighed while securing his towel before calling another one from the shower to his hands to give it to Angel #2. Both Angel #1 and Angel #2 cast Obi-Wan furious glances as they held onto their respective towels.
Obi-Wan ignored them while he shrugged off his Jedi Cloak and handed it to Angel #3 as her memento. Angel #3 gave a shaky "Thank you," as she hugged the cloak close to her and allowed Obi-Wan to kiss her hand with a slight bow again.
"Now ladies, although Obi-Wan and I would enjoy sharing your company, you will need to leave to make it back to your tour group." Anakin paused for a moment as he stared up into the sky as if investigating a sound. "They are looking for you right now."
"Yes ladies, it is time for you three to go. You have your souvenirs." Obi-Wan stated, ushering the three out so that Anakin could get dressed. Angel #1 and #2 cast glances over their shoulders and giggled once more when they saw Anakin untying his towel. However, the door closed before they saw any of his hidden flesh.
"Just go down that hall. Your tour group is waiting for you." Obi-Wan stated to the three Angels, before he retreated into what must have been his own room. All three gave a long lustful sigh when they were alone in the hallway. With nothing else to do, the Angels made their way back down their original path to their waiting tour group. All three had huge smiles on their faces.
There was silence as they carried their souvenirs down the hall. When they rejoined their tour group, irritated faces stared back at the women as the Angel's adventure had delayed the tour. In response to this, Angel #1 beamed at all assembled. "I don't know about all of you, but I plan on coming back tomorrow!"