Summary: After Edward's abrupt departure in New Moon, All that was left of Bella Swan was a shell hell-bent on breaking the promise to avoid danger. Having embraced her innate wild side, she is much different from the shy and forgiving girl that the Cullens were familiar with before their departure. However during one of her daredevil expeditions, she chances upon Jasper and slowly begins to question the self-destructive lifestyle that she is living. Sometimes there is a distinction between knowing the right way and following through with it. JxB

Author's notes: This is the first piece of fiction I've written in like 4 years (shocking, I know and I'm not even out of school yet) and I know there are many out there who are not comfortable with the idea of Bella with anyone but Edward. But I also strongly believe that Jasper is a character of many complexities who has unfortunately been sidelined many a time not only in fan fiction but sometimes in canon as well. Feel free to give constructive criticism and who knows? Maybe you'll like it.




Sad, small, sweet, so delicate
You're skin and bones, I'm a nervous wreck
I got a bad feeling about this (when it comes to this)
I got a bad feeling about this

-A decade under the influence, Taking Back Sunday


His dark amber eyes were a stark contrast against the pitch darkness of the ghastly forest terrain. Yet everything appeared to be in an almost ethereal stillness. His lithe form was pitched in an unforgiving rigid posture blending in almost perfectly amongst the still trees. A mild autumn breeze sent the trees into a chorus of lullaby. His breath momentarily hitched and with a blink, his amber eyes were suddenly morphed into orbs of coal. He edgily shifted his weight from one foot to another, palms grasping a nearby tree trunk and was once again stiff as a board.

The tree bark gave a distinct snap as it pulverized into fine powder, carried away by the breeze.


He left her. After all the promises of forever, he had still left her.

He had not only abandoned her, he had taken from her everything, memories, gifts, even her ability to feel.

It will be as if I'd never exist.

The shock of Edward's abandonment was starting to wear away and the gravity of her predicament was finally starting to permeate Bella's mind. She helplessly sunk to in floor and for the longest time pressed her head against the wall, wrapping her arms around herself, desperately trying to avoid a complete meltdown.

A sudden, disconcerting feeling of animalistic desire jerked her out of her despair, followed closely by a curious snapping sound. Hope involuntarily coursed through her entire being as Bella wondered if she was starting to imagine things in her desperation. Surely, it cannot be?

Nonetheless, Bella found herself drifting towards the open window to investigate. Almost immediately, she locked eyes with the pair of dark, almost black amber orbs. She was right after all.


But the question was what exactly was he doing outside her window.

To that, Bella did not have the darnest idea.


Quietly cursing his carelessness, Jasper stepped out of the shadows and was immediately bombarded with a truckload of Bella's pain, despair and a tinge of hope.

His face contorted into a pained grimace; he was the ultimate cause for all her pain. He was the reason that his family lost one of its members. His self-loathe and inadequacy increased tenfold and he abruptly halted his steps not wanting to cause any more possible damage.

Falling to his knees, he angrily pressed his forehead into his palms. He wanted to make it all better for Bella but what he could offer was only temporary relief. He wanted to tell her he was sorry. Sorry for not having control; sorry for attacking her; sorry for causing Edward to leave her; sorry for giving her hope; and sorry for going to crush this tiny hope.

Moments later, when he had finally calmed himself, Jasper tentatively looked up at Bella. She was biting her lip softly with her arms wrapping her torso. She looked so frail, so breakable at that moment. Yet her eyes were brimming with understanding, acceptance, forgiveness.

No words were needed to be spoken.

He understood.

And it was more than anything he could have hoped for.

A/N: Confusing and angsty I know. Future chapters will not be so.