Tony Hawk

Gibbs saw the elevator doors open and instead of walking in at a quick pace, he looked like he was gliding. Ziva stood open mouthed as Tony missed the bullpen entrance and went zooming past in an unbelievable pace and almost bumped into the stairs. Tony came walking back with a sulky look on his face as he walked into the bullpen with a skateboard under his arm.

"Any cases today Boss?" Tony asked as he put the skateboard on the carpet near his table.

"Yes DiNozzo," Gibbs said. "But I thought it's such a beautiful day, I didn't want to spoil it," he added in sarcasm.

"Why do you have a skateboard Tony?" Ziva asked. "Do you think you are Tony Eagle?" She asked.

"I think you mean Tony Hawk… But no, not really Zee-Vah," Tony answered as he began tearing up a bit of scrap paper into tiny pieces as loudly as he could before sitting down.

"Well you look like Tony Hawk with that skateboard," McGee said.

"Careful, I'm beginning to think you have a thing for him McGay," Tony said as he sat on his seat and began coughing.

"Are you alright?" Gibbs asked with a concerned look.

Tony held his hand up to signal that he was fine as he used the other hand to cover his mouth as he coughed harder and bits of paper looked as if it was coming out of his mouth as it flew into the air.

"I got it now!" McGee exclaimed loudly. "It's definitely not Tony Hawk is it," he said with a smile.

"Nope," Tony replied as he stood near the skateboard. "Hey McGee,"

"Yes Tony?" He asked.

"What would you like to do?" Tony asked. "Would you like to swing on a star or carry moonbeams home in a jar or be better than you are or would you rather be a mule?" Tony sung as he took the skateboard out of the bullpen.

"A mule is an animal with long funny ears, he kicks up at anything he hears." McGee continued the song and stood up to watch Tony walk around with the skateboard. "Hi back is brawny and his brain is weak… He's just plain stupid with a stubborn streak." McGee sung louder as Tony was kneeling on the skateboard using his hands to push him along.

"Kind of like Tony," Ziva said.

"And by the way, if you hate to go to school, you may grow up to be a mule." Tony whizzed passed as he clasped onto the front of the skateboard. "Or would you rather be a fish?"

"A fish is an animal that swims in a brook, it doesn't write its name or read a book," McGee watched Tony zip right back again. "And to fool the people is his only thought, though he's slippery he always gets caught," He sung.

"If that's the sort of life that you wish… You may grow up to be a fish." Tony rolled into the bullpen and stood up.

"And all the monkeys aren't in the zoo. Everyday you meet quite a few." McGee and Tony sung in unison. "You see its all up to you, you could be better than you are," they sung.

"Take it home," Tony said. "Come on."

"You could be swinging on a star," McGee went for the big finish and their performance was greeted by silence.

"Well?" Tony asked nervously.

"You're right about one thing DiNozzo," Gibbs said. "All the monkeys aren't in the zoo."

Tony sighed and looked at Ziva as he hoped that she'd have something nice to say. "That was pitiful," Ziva said. "Your performance was flat and plain awful. Honestly, I don't even know why you bother showing up," she said coldly.

"God Zee-Vah, it was a mistake getting you interested in watching American Idol," Tony replied. There wasn't much of a difference between Ziva and Simon Cowell. "Hey Probie, come here," McGee approached him with a certain amount of caution. "Looking good my man," Tony patted his stomach.

"No, Tony," McGee tried to talk him out of it.

"It's the perfect song Probie," Tony said as he was almost smiling. "Duh, duh duhduh duh…. Duh duh duhduh duh," he began.

Ziva glanced over at Gibbs who was now standing up. "Has anyone got a spare case?!" He asked. "Anybody? Anything?"

"Duh, duh duhduh duh… We ain't got a barrel of money. We maybe ragged and funny. But we're travelling along, singing our song side by side," Tony begun singing.

"Through all kinds of weather, what if the sky should fall. As long as we're together, it doesn't matter, doesn't matter at all," McGee just couldn't help himself. He had to join in with the music.

"When they've all had their quarrels and parted, we'll be the same as we started… Just travelling along, singing this song side by…" Tony sung.

Before Tony could react, Ziva had moved right next to him and held the letter opener to his throat. "Side," she said. "You guys are not the only ones to see Hudson Hawk am I right?" She added.

"Right," Tony's adam's apple rubbed against the blade as he swallowed. "I'll shut up now."

"Wise move Tony," Ziva said.

"I've got a present for you Zee-Vah," Tony said once she sat down. He placed a long rectangular paper on her desk.

"A bumper sticker?" Ziva asked as she read it, "How's my driving? 1800-We're gonna fucking die!" She screwed the bumper sticker up and tossed it in the bin.

A/N: Ok, this chapter is dedicated to Hudson Hawk, a really good action parody.

Next Chapter: 4Ps: Paper Planes & Pity Pitt
Preview: They get ORDERED to do their physical and get checked up