Summary: Caspian has had enough of battle and conflict; he just wants peace. But it will only come to him in his dreams... Suspian. Third in the Mindscape series.
Disclaimer: The Chronicles of Narnia and its characters are owned by CS Lewis, I'm just borrowing them.
AN: This is the third in my mindscape series although it is not necessary for you to have read the other two first. Those who have will hopefully be picking up the continued storyline.
Caspian dropped his battle garments to the ground and started undressing himself mechanically, his eyes blank and his mind far away. He hated fighting, truly hated it. It only brought pain and more conflict, and it hardly ever solved the problem it supposedly set out to right. Today had been terrible, and whilst the fighting had been at a minimum, it had still been present. Why did there have to be so much struggle? His people had earned peace, were even living in peace themselves, and here outsiders were, trying to take that away from them, and all for their own selfish needs.
It made him sick, so sick of all of it. Why couldn't it just stop?
The servants were doing what his soldiers had done as they trekked home; looking at him with guarded, worried expressions and not quite meeting his eyes. It was almost as if they were afraid of what they might see there. In all honesty, Caspian didn't even think he knew what they would see. He was just so tired of all of it.
Yet he was King, he was the one to rule, the one to cope with all of this so to better his people. It wasn't about his needs or wants, but his peoples, and Narnia had been through enough. How could he not protect his people from more harm? True they had stopped the attack, and given enough warning that another attempt would be very ill-advised, but word would spread. Word would spread that there had been more fighting and there would be disquiet amongst everybody, wondering how long their precious peace could last. Caspian had been very lucky with the little hostilities that had occurred between the Telmarines and Narnians; he didn't need them started up again from worry about other conflicts.
By Aslan, he didn't need any more conflict, of any kind.
Entering his bedchamber, Caspian shut the door firmly and bolted it, knowing it was extremely childish of him to shut himself away but needing to regardless. He just needed to think by himself, to not be aware how every person and Creature around him was looking at him and scrutinising his expressions.
He needed to not be the King for a few hours, to just be a man who was tired of the world around him and how little he could do to actually help it. Not even bothering to untie the strings he pulled his shirt off over his head as he kicked off his boots. As much as he knew he needed to think and plan and regroup in his head, to get ready for tomorrow, all he could truly think about was sleep. If he could just rest maybe tomorrow he would have the energy to do the rest.
Not bothering with removing his leggings Caspian simply sat on his bed and then collapsed backwards on it, closing his eyes and not bothering with anything else. Soon he felt his body relaxing, his muscles being coaxed to release their tension, and his breathing becoming slower and shallower as gentle hands swept across him.
"You are much too tense." A wonderfully familiar voice whispered in his ear.
"I had a bad day." He whispered back, unwilling to open his eyes in case he lost this fantasy.
"How so?" The hands continued down and over his chest, rubbing soothing circles that although were relaxing most parts of his body were also beginning to excite others.
"Invaders." He whispered, his voice as tired as his soul was.
"From where?" She said sharply, her voice tight and her hands stilling.
"The North." He replied.
"Was there fighting?" She whispered and Caspian could hear the pain in her voice; pain for their suffering, for her people, for him.
Finally opening his eyes Caspian sat up and cupped her face in his hands, stroking it tenderly as he tried to smile for her. "Only a little," he answered, knowing his reply would sadden her. "But it is over now and nobody was killed."
"Was anyone hurt?" Her blues eyes stared worriedly back at him, her hands spreading themselves over his chest and shoulders unconsciously checking for wounds.
"A centaur, and two fauns. We were much luckier than the enemy. I doubt they will be returning."
"I'm glad. I hate to think of you fighting. I know you can, and that you're very good at it. I just don't like the idea of it." She sighed.
Caspian crushed her into his chest, his arms encircling her and holding her tight against him. "I felt much the same way at the Battle of the How," he whispered. "When you almost fell..." He shuddered and she squeezed him tightly in response.
"I'm sorry it has to be this way Caspian," She murmured against his skin, her lips dancing across and sending shivers through him. "I hate that it is this way."
"There is nothing that can be done with it," He whispered back, his nose nuzzling her neck through her thick hair. "We must just live our lives the best we can around it. We must take what we can in pleasure to make up for the horrors."
"Oh?" She smiled as she sat back from him slightly so they could now face each other. "And what would you take?"
"You, my queen." He whispered before moulding his lips to hers.
Susan responded and wrapped her arms around his neck as Caspian puller her waist closer to his. Deepening the kiss they slowly let their tongues entwine and dance around the others, sensuously exploring each other as they took their time. Drawing back a fraction Susan breathed in quickly before continuing the kiss, her lips never really leaving his. They kept kissing like this for what felt like hours to them, caught up in the sensations of each other.
Carefully Caspian brought her closer to him, his arms wrapped around her in a tight but gentle grip. He was so very aware of the fighting and conflict and the thought of her being hurt tore at his insides. All he wanted to do was keep her safe and well, away from harm and unhappiness. Right at that moment all he could focus on was how soft she felt, and soft things were fragile, breakable.
"Caspian..." She breathed against his skin and he couldn't help his reaction as he pushed her down beneath him. Instantly afraid that he'd hurt her, her rolled them so she was lying on top of him, her hair falling down and creating a curtain around their faces, blocking out the world. The only thing Caspian could focus on was her and it soothed his troubled soul.
Running his hands up and down her arms, he revelled in the feeling of her shivering against him. Her hands fisted tightly against his sides but still they didn't break their kisses. Gasping against the others lips and sharing their very air it was one of the most intimate experiences of his life.
Susan started to run her hands up and down him then, tangling one in his hair as the other started fiddling with the top of his leggings. Caspian couldn't help but let out a moan at her touches and when she whimpered in response he felt a little bit of his control slip. But he held fast as she started to move against him slightly; he'd had enough conflict, enough fighting today and he didn't want anything that reminded him of that. He wouldn't lose control and take her roughly, giving in to that inner rage. He would not harm her in that way, not when she was calming him so, making him feel again after his weariness of battle.
His hands reached up and gently began to tug down the top of her nightdress, pulling it down off her shoulders inch by torturous inch until it exposed the top of her breasts and fell around her elbows. He would not her tonight, he would love her and in doing so she may just love him in return.
"Caspian..." She whispered against his lips again and he dipped his head away from hers as his hands re-arranged themselves. One gripped the small of her back holding her to him, whilst the other slid beneath the remains of her nightdress to cup one of her breasts and bring it upwards to his awaiting mouth. She gasped and arched against him as his mouth surrounded her perk nipple, his tongue flicking it gently. Her hands dug into his scalp and hip but it was a very small price to pay.
"Oh, oh." She mewled and his heart soared, free of everything but her, the way she felt, the way she sounded; everything about her.
He applied more pressure, although he was careful to keep it lighter than anything that could hurt her. She started arching into him more forcefully and his other hand responded, pulling her lower half against him as well. The delightful pressure caused him to moan and her to whimper but he couldn't stop, moving her against him as he feasted on her breast.
"Please Caspian." She panted ad he looked upwards through heavy lidded eyes to see her head thrown backwards, her neck extinguished beautifully as she arched above him. He released her breast and immediately moved to the other not bothering to bring this one out of her nightgown and sucking at it through the thin material. She started mewling again and Caspian took more into his mouth as other hand started kneading the breast it was still holding. She started to arch her whole body into him and Caspian growled against her breast as he bucked up against her.
"What are you doing to me?" She gasped as his hand from her back began to pull her nightgown up, arranging the slit so his hand could slip under and circle her thighs softly. She arched against him again and her hands suddenly unclenched, seeking action of their own. She pulled his head tighter against her breast and eliciting another growl from him whilst her other hand pulled at the ties to his leggings, wanting to release him. She pushed away the material as the ties fell away and quickly took him into her hand causing him to bite down against her breast and for them to both cry out. His hand quickly reached up her thigh as he began to kiss up her neck, seeking the warmth between her thighs. She cried out again as he brushed his fingertips over her and he groaned as her juices coated him. His hand came back out and reached down to where hers lay, gripping him tightly.
"I, my queen," He panted into her ear as they together led him to her entrance. "Am making love to you." With one quick thrust Caspian sheathed himself inside of her moaning against her neck as she cried out. His hand moved down to her leg and pulled it up against him as he waited to move. Her hand returned to his shoulder and she pulled his head up to hers with her other one, kissing him passionately.
Caspian groaned into her as their tongues accepted each other and he couldn't lie still anymore, thrusting up into her slowly. Susan cried out against his lips but he kept them pressed together as he withdrew and again pushed up into her slowly, fully sheathing himself inside of her. She broke of against him, panting for breath and Caspian threw his head back as he again moved his hips slowly, finding the deepest places within her.
"Oh God... Oh Aslan..." She whispered and started to move against him.
"M-my queen..." He stuttered, pulling her leg tighter and thrusting slightly harder. "Susan..."
"Caspian," She cried out and arched herself up against him, allowing him to lower his head back to her chest.
The pleasure was mounting slowly, almost unbearably slowly but Caspian relished in it, relished in the wonderful warm feelings flooding his body every time Susan would move against him or cry out. The best feeling, even better than hitting the deepest, tightest, hottest place within her, was when she called out his name. It was almost enough to make him release himself.
These feelings were cleansing his soul, showing him what he fought all the conflict for, why it was worth fighting. He could feel every bad feeling, every tired, worried thought leave him as all he could concentrate on was the woman in his arms. The beautiful queen in his arms who made his heart swell with peace and love and happiness and every other miracle feeling out there.
"Oh Caspian... I-I..." She whispered, her voice almost air it was so faint but Caspian could only focus on the sweet melody of it, not the words as he thrusted harder into her, deeper. She cried again and he repeated it, her body bucking against his helplessly as she was reduced to cries and him to grunts.
Clutching at her skin Caspian gave one last flick to her nipple before he crashed his mouth over Susan's, tongue thrusting into her mouth as his hips bucked upwards. She cried out into his mouth as her walls clenched around him and she came. He let go and thrusted up into her, as hard as he could to a slightly faster rhythm, riding out her orgasm and prolonging as she pulled at his skin and hair.
"Caspian!" She screamed as he came inside of her with a groan of her name, his powerful release sending her into a second of her own. They rode it out together, their bodies helplessly bucking against one another until she collapsed against him.
He cradled her in his arms as he nuzzled her neck, her whispered words of admiration and thanks almost lost on him as sleep overtook them both.
Waking with a start Caspian jolted upwards and then strictly reprimanded himself for he would wake Susan. Looking around his room though he could see he was quite alone. Sinking back into his pillows the lightness and peace that had followed from his dream into reality lessened slightly as he realised it was just that; another dream.
Sighing he lifted himself from bed and could almost feel the despair creeping back in on him when a soft voice floated to him through the air.
"Stay strong Caspian..." The voice of his angelic queen whispered. "You are loved so much..."
Caspian closed his eyes and focused his entire being on that voice, wishing for it to somehow be real and be there with him. But when he opened his eyes everything was the same and he got up to attend to his day.
His heart however, still held a little of that peace, that love, and that was enough for now.
Susan rolled over and smiled into her pillow, her whole body humming with pleasure and warmth. Opening her yes she stared up into the cracks of her curtains, the golden light of day shining through. Sitting up she focused on that light, it echoed the feeling inside of her and she pretended it was a link back to Narnia; that it was her radiant southern sun, and she spoke the words she knew he'd need to hear.
I know it's a bit sappy but hopefully its romantic sappy and not overkill-too-much-sugar sappy; I went for the first one.