Chapter 8-Letting You Go

Two Weeks Later


Plunging my heel into the demon's chest, I lifted my other foot off the ground, practically snapping its neck off with the force behind my kick. It hissed, its eyes pitch black. I smirked and said, "Oh, did I hurt you? I'm so sorry."

Growling, it pushed itself backwards, landing on its feet like a cat. Impressive, but not enough to save its life.

Before it knew what was happening, I threw my hand into the wound my heel made. After muttering a few lines of Latin, my body grew warm-practically glowing. I could feel my grace slide down my arms to my fingertips, seeking out the demon in order to destroy it. I watched as the demon (and its host body) incinerated.

The ashes settled around me, some sticking to my clothes. Ew.

"And that, boys, is how you kill a demon." I smiled, turning to the Winchesters.

Both of them had their eyes wide open. "'re vicious," Dean said.

I shrugged my shoulders. I wasn't going to argue. It was true. "Ready to leave?" I asked. "I know I am."

While the boys were cleaning up, I headed outside. My body was on fire, my electrons abuzz from the energy I'd used to kill the demon. Outside, it was cold out, dousing the heat on my body down. I closed my eyes, inhaling deeply, focusing on the sounds around me. It was faint, but I heard the song of wings fluttering, and knew Cass was near. I turned, opening my eyes and smiling. "Cass, what are you doing here?"

He stepped into the moonlight, looking like the angel he was. Jesus, he was gorgeous. Those blue eyes just cut into me like a dagger. "How is Dean?"

"Good. You know, I haven't had a change to talk to you about last week."

He looked to the ground for a moment before facing me again. "Yes?"

I stepped closer to hi m, my arms across my chest and my dark hair blowing in the wind. "It was really good of you to help them...with Lilith and Mr. Prophecy. I'm sorry I missed it. Which, you know, sucks seeing as how in all my centuries I've never met a prophet."

He cleared his throat, nodding his head. "Yes, well, Raphael needed you."

I licked my lips, wondering why there was heat in the air around me. My energy never transferred itself to the things around me, it just bubbled and brewed within me. So...why I could feel the particles of oxygen charging with a sort of electricity? "Yeah, harpies don't kill themselves and I am quite good at exterminating them. But,'re changing, Cass."

He was silent for a moment, then, "It scares me."

I smiled, putting a hand on his warm chest. "Oh, come on. You're still the same diligent little angel. Just...a little more of a free thinker."

The fingers I had on his chest grew warmer and I could practically feel the air snapping. It was then that I knew what was going on. I couldn't help but laugh. Cass thought he could hide it...but I knew.

He arched a brow and said, "What?"

Without thinking, I pressed my lips to his. I didn't move, instead choosing to memorize the feeling of his lips on mine. I could feel his grace tingling with my own. It was like they were mixing, bonding. Suddenly, my fingers were zapped, as if by a static shock-only bigger.

I pulled back, instantly massaging my burned fingertips. "If you wanted to kiss me, all you had to do was ask."

Castiel touched his lips, frowning slightly. "I...don't know what this is. My human host must enjoy your presence."

I shook my head. "No, no way are you going to weasel your way out of admitting how you feel by saying its your host. I felt your grace, Cass. Come on, we've been skirting around this for eons." I poked him, looking him straight in the eyes. "You, Castiel, Angel of God, are attracted to me, Alista. Half angel of God...ish."

For the briefest of moments, a bright blue light burned from his eyes, captivating me. And then he was gone. Typical.

Running a hand through my hair, I slid into the back of the Impala, waiting for the boys to finish up.


I watched in odd fascination as Dean chowed down on two bacon cheeseburgers. Man, that boy could eat.

He pointed to my fries and asked, "You gonna eat those?"

I shook my head, pushing the plate towards him. Usually, I was hungrier after a kill, but right now, I was just a little nauseated. Weird.

'I picked up a coffee mug, the deliciously hot liquid sliding past my lips with ease. Lips that can still feel Cass' kiss. Gah! I have to stop thinking about that!

I was pathetic.

"Earth to Alista," Dean said, snapping his fingers.

I blinked, confused. "Huh?"

"I asked you what's wrong. You seem out of it. You sure that harpy scratch isn't giving you problems?"

I glanced at said scratch, the area around it bright pink from my incessant scratching. "Nope, it's just itchy from the salve I put on it. I burned any traces of harpy out." I sighed, blowing a piece of hair out of my face. "I'm fine. Just tired."

"Well, you'll have to sleep in the car," Sam said. His eyes were on his computer, a pensive look on his face.

"What do you mean? We can't be jumping into another job. We just finished this one." Dean spoke up.

"Tell that to the demons flocking into this town." Sam swung the laptop so we could read the article.

I took another drink of coffee, muttering, "Damn," as I read. Typical demonic signs were popping up all over this town.

"Usually demons are more careful," Dean observed.

"Which means they're either sloppy or they want someone to notice." I said.

"Which is more likely?" Sam questioned, though I'm sure he knew.

"Latter. The question we need to figure out is who." I leaned back, clicking my tongue against the roof of my mouth. "Who do they want to see?"

Dean finished my fries and stood. "The only way we'll find out is by being there." He threw some dollar bills on the table for the waitress, as I'd already paid for the meal. "Let's go find out."

Damn. Guess I was gonna have to sleep in the car.


I was dreaming. I could tell because I was a) suddenly in the middle of a forest and b) there was a deer floating past me. Yup. I was dreaming. Or going insane; one of the two.

"You're dreaming," Cass said, stepping out from the shadows. He always made such dramatic entrances. Must've been an angel thing.

"All right. So... are you a dream Castiel or the real thing?"

He took a step towards me, the tan trench coat billowing around his ankles. "Which would you like me to be?" he asked.

Wow. What a loaded question. "Well, dream Cass lets loose a little more," I teased.

By the time I was finished talking, he was a mere inch from me. "It's me," he said.

"Okay," I whispered, wondering what he was going to do.

To my surprise, he kissed me. It was short, sweet, and entirely real; for once it wasn't my imagination. Pulling back a centimeter, he told me, "I care about you."

My heart thumped in my chest like a madman. "I care for you, too."

"I don't know what to do."

I chuckled. "Well, that makes two of us. I never thought we'd be this situation." I looked around, a slight mist was hovering at our feet and across the grass. "Speaking of here...where are we?"

"The in-between. The place where neither Heaven nor Hell can hear or see what happens."

Well...that was interesting. "Wow...I imagined it to be more...colorful. It's kinda drab."

"Yes, the Eden used to be far more beautiful than this."

I turned my attention to him, my jaw dropped. "Eden? As in garden of?"

He nodded his head.

I broke out of his embrace, walking around. I was in the garden of Eden...holy shit. "H-how is that possible?"

"After the Lord banished Adam and Even from the garden, he closed it, blocking it from any angel or demon. Turning a blind eye, he never knew when someone figured out how to get inside. And because he cloaked it-"

"No one knows what happens. Who's in here talking about what..." I knelt down, my head on my hands. This was nuts. "Wow," was all I could say.

"Are you all right?" he asked, standing behind me.

I threw him a glance over my shoulder. "Yeah, I'm fine. Just...wrapping my head around everything." I held out my hand, smiling as he helped me to my feet. Running a hand through my hair, I exhaled. " there any way we can listen in? Maybe...plant something that'll allow us to hear any conversations?"

"There are none that I know of."

"Damn." I bit my lip, scouring my brain for anything that might help. I came up empty. "Why did you bring me here?" I questioned, changing the question. What can I say, I was curious.

He was still, a blue light slithering above his skin. I noticed it on my own too. Uh-oh.

"Anywhere else, anyone could see us. But here-"

"No one would," I finished for him. Without realizing it, I was walking towards him.

He put a hand on my cheek. "Yes."

I wrapped my arms around his neck, pressing my lips to his in a hungry kiss. I moved my hands down his back as the kiss deepened, smiling when I felt his wings shuddering underneath the human skin. There was nothing I wanted more than to feel those wings touch my bare skin...

Our graces slid together, heightening everything we felt.

Before things could go any further, I pulled back, my lips swollen from the activity. I gazed into his eyes, hating myself for what I was about to say. "If the only way I can be with you is secretly, by hiding and being ashamed, then...I can't be with you. No matter how much I want to be...I can't do that. I won't." I paused, searching for the right words to say. "What we feel for each isn't evil. It's not wrong, or a sin. Angels already have feelings, like companionship. You saw how much it killed you to see Uriel close you two were. Why can't angels love, too? I...I have no clue what to say." I sighed, closing my eyes.

Choosing a different route, I continued. "I know how much love the Lord. I would never ask you to put me before him, and I know you wouldn't. You can't. Caring for me is different than the love you feel for Him. Loving me would be different than loving Him. Does...does it feel wrong to you?"

"No," he answered, a light sheen coating his eyes. "Not at all, and that worries me. Because I don't want to fall from the Lord's graces."

I smiled. "If I was worried about that for a second, I wouldn't be here. I care for you far too much to see you lose the best part of you." Shrugging my shoulders, I added, "And if it's any consolation, I've slept with a lot of people and haven't been smited." Yet. "And I'm an angel too."

He didn't say anything. He just wore that contemplative look on his face, his eyes burning into mine.

I squeezed his hand, a tear sliding down my cheek. This was too hard for him. I couldn't make him go through this. "I know how difficult this is for you. And I don't want you to...if it'd be easier I can...let you go. We don't have to-"

He cut me off. "I don't want to let you go."

Oh...well...that was good news. "R-really?"

He smirked. "No. I haven't been watching over you for this long to just let you go now." He kissed me softly and said, "I'll think of something."

After that, I woke up. Adjusting to the sudden darkness, I sat up, my neck stiff. Well...that was a trip, wasn't it?

Sam was asleep in the passenger sleep. Dean looked like he was ready to collapse himself. "You want me to drive?" I asked, Cass' touch still all over me.

"Nah, but thanks."

"Yeah, no problem."

I leaned my head back, trying to focus not on Cass, but on what he'd told me. How could we listen in on a place that was blocked against that very thing?

I had a headache already.

a/n: i love cass (: