Finally saw that episode and Gah, really intense one. I could actually feel the tension when they were fighting, and I hate that :( But such good Sam and Dean angst in that episode that I wanted to go deeper into it, so yeah, here it is. Yes, some of the lines are from the episode. But it's going to be different-I promise you!


Prologue

"If I didn't know you, I would want to hunt you. So would other hunters."

"You were gone. I was here. And I had to keep on fighting without you. And what I'm doing....it works."

"So tell me, if it's so terrific than why'd you lie about it to me? Why did an Angel tell me to stop you?"

"What?"

"Cas said if I don't stop you he will. So what that means, Sam, that means God doesn't want you doing this. So are you just going to stand there and tell me that everything's all good? ..."

Sam stared at him, blinking back the tears. So was this how it happened? Was this how Dean found out the truth? About everything? They stood there, each consumed in silence. Nobody could say anything.

Dean stared at his brother and saw the hurt in his eyes. Saw the tears that he was fighting back. Dean knew he hit below the belt when he told Sammy he would want to hunt him. That was low, even for him.

Sam opened his mouth, than closed it.

"No," he said softly, his voice choked up. "No, I guess not." He shook his head. Silently he went to the table and took his laptop and started to stuff his things into bags.

Dean sighed, groaning at his choice of words. Of what he said.

"What are you doing, Sammy?"

"What does it look like Dean?" Sam snapped, looking up. "I can't explain why I'm doing this, because you won't understand. You refuse to. So there's no point to it."

"Sam-"

"No you said it yourself. If you didn't know me, you'd hunt me. So I've become a monster now, is that it?"

Dean sighed, allowing those words to punch him in the stomach. He kind of deserved them.

"Sammy I'm..."

"What? Sorry? You can't say something like that and just take it back and pretend it never happened. But you know what? You're right. I am walking down a slippery sloap Dean, but you have NO idea what it's like to have demon blood in me, so-"

"Wait," Dean said quickly. "You know about this?" All this time he was wondering how to break it to Sammy, that he had demon blood in him, and he knew about it?"

Sam looked away.

"Yeah, I've known for over a year."

"Why didn't you tell me?" Dean snapped and Sam sighed.

"I would have Dean, and I should have, but I was a little bit preoccupided you know. With the whole dying and coming back to life and than trying to save you from hell..which failed." He shook his head. "Of course. I couldn't even save my own brother."

He sighed and shook his head. He rubbed his forehead, and not because of a headache.

"Look, maybe we've been on the road for too long, Dean. It might be better if we..."

"What split up?" Dean asked, fear in his voice. What had he started.? "You gonna run away now? Is that it?"

"But that's what you were about to do just now!" Sam bellowed, as he grabbed his bags. "So YES, that's exactly what I'm doing. I'm leaving before..."

"Before what?"

"Before thans get worse and I...and I hurt you somehow."

"Mission already accomplished," Dean spat. "Lying to me, keeping secrets? That's worse than any physical injuries. The fact that you couldn't trust me..."

"It's NOT that Dean!" Sam cried, frusteration roaring in his body. "I didn't tell you because of THIS! Because I KNEW you wouldn't understand. Because you'd look at me like I'm some sort of freak! I hate it when you look at me like that. Like you can't stand the way I am..."

"That's not true," Dean scoffed. "I don't look at you like that."

"Yes you do, Dean. I'm a whole new level of freak, okay? And I have to deal with this and I'm sorry you don't understand. You have no idea how sorry...."As his voice trailed off Dean watched as tears fell down his face. "I'm sorry," Sam repeated and grabbed his bags. Before Dean could say anything he stormed out.