Disclaimer: I do not own Twilight. Or Edward – Or Robert – Damn it.

A/N: So I posted a ridiculously long version of this on the SmutVent calendar that the BritishBitches invited me to participate in. I am now breaking it down into chapters and adding to it, so please stick with me and don't fret about rereading it. There's gonna be some explanation, elaboration, and a bit of Edward's point of view thrown in, so enjoy!

Chapter One: Halloween Hell

Why is it that I have to dress up for this costume party again? Oh yeah – It's my job. Wait, why do I have this job again? I mean college freshmen are annoying, so why is it I've agreed to be a resident advisor in this dorm, which is the one full of them? Well, full of freshmen and the occasional college employee that was roped into staying here to help – or to take pity on us lowly RA's.

Why oh why do I have this job? Oh yeah – it pays for my room & board. Dang it. I'm supposed to do something substantial with my life now.

I have done one thing right this semester – I've actually chosen a major. I couldn't very well continue on a course of general education no matter how much I'd like to just stay a student forever. I guess becoming a junior at the University of Seattle is one of those defining moments where you're supposed to learn the importance of independence.

Or it's someone's sick idea of a joke. Living in a dorm isn't exactly great. I mean, I've gotten past that stage of drinking, partying, and the subsequent puking. I am twenty-two years old for Pete's sake – not eighteen.

Now I have to suck it up and pay for the bills. Being an RA was pretty much my only option. I couldn't afford room and board and pay for my ever increasing tuition with my old job. Heck, I couldn't pay one or the other with my old job. But with this, room and board was covered, three quarters of my tuition was waved, and the other quarter of it was paid for by my salary. The only downside is that I actually have to advise the residents of Weston Hall, my dormitory. Ugh.

My job is kind of easy, I suppose. I mean, I'm only expected to make a few speeches at the beginning and end of each semester to go over dorm rules and procedures and such, and to be available to the female residents of the fifth floor. I had fourteen freshmen and two sophomore girls who had applied late to a few of the other dorms and ended up stuck in Weston. No biggie, right?

Well, I thought so too once. I had forgotten just how hyper freshmen were. And I had fourteen of them. They did party and they thought it was funny to knock on everyone's doors at four am on Saturday morning. Thank goodness pledge and rush week of the University fraternities and sororities were over within the first two and a half weeks of the semester, or else I think I would have killed someone. One drunken girl I can handle. Four is a different story that I never wish to relive.

Like I said though, the drunken episodes had died down considerably. But today was the last day of midterms. And it was Halloween. And it was Friday. I should have not been surprised by the knock on my door this afternoon once I was back in my room, since I knew something was bound to be strange on this day.

"Hey, Bella," I heard after a light knock.

"Yeah, come on in," I replied. I looked up to find Angela Weber, one of the sophomores on my floor, lingering in the open doorway. "Oh, hey Angela. What can I do for you?"

"Do you mind if I ask you a dumb question? I kind of can't ask my roommate for advice and I don't really know anyone else here in Seattle, and you said your door was always open at the beginning of the semester and everything."

She was rambling. Great. "Umm, yeah sure Angela – come on in."

I swiveled around in my computer chair and motioned for her to take a seat on the edge of my bed. She walked over slowly and wrung her hands in her lap after she sat down.

"So, what is it I can help you with?" God – please don't be anything weird. I'm not really a people person, but my job says I have to be. I'm not exactly what you would call anti-social or anything, but I only really have one friend here in Seattle – Alice.

"So, umm…" Angela began.

"Its okay, Angela," I said, calming her. Wow, maybe I have some people skills after all.

"Yeah, I totally have a crush on this upper classman that lives here in the dorm and he doesn't give me the time of day," she blurted out.

I did not see that one coming. My shocked face must have read like an open book, because Angela closed her eyes. I took a few breaths and realized she was waiting for me to respond.

"Alright, so you have a little crush," I started. God, I sounded like my father Charlie. How strangely parent like of me.

She opened her eyes and started again. "Yeah, well, I talked to my roommate Lauren once about guys and that was not really a good idea. She went out with that baseball player Mike Newton a few weeks ago, so I casually asked her to have him introduce me to my crush, since he plays baseball too, I think. She said Mike was a jerk-off."

I didn't know what to say. I knew Mike was a pretty decent baseball player, so he was popular around campus, but I had not pegged him as a total douche.

Angela broke the silence when I didn't respond. "See, Lauren told me that she slept with Mike. He then proceeded to brag all over campus about what an easy lay she was."

My mouth hung open, but she continued anyways. "I don't know what to do now. I don't think the guy that I have a crush on is like that, but I don't know. I don't want him to think that I'm like Lauren either. I mean, I feel bad for her about the rumors and all, but who sleeps with a guy after knowing him for only a couple of days?"

After a few more moments of silence I decided to find my voice again. "Well, I umm, don't have a lot of experience in this department."

"But you're friends with that girl Alice Brandon, right?"

"Yeah, Alice is my best friend," I said, confused at the turn our conversation had taken.

"Well, Alice is like the most popular girl on campus, right?" she asked.

"Oh," I replied. Crap, now I know where she's going with this. "Umm, yeah, she's pretty popular you could say. But that doesn't mean I am in any way shape or form. I wouldn't know the first thing about meeting a guy, or talking to a crush, or whatever."

Once I was done rambling, she looked down at her hands again, defeated. Great, I'm failing at my job because I have a non-existent social life. I had to at least throw her a bone.

"So," I began, looking down at my own hands. "Alice told me something just the other day, and it gives me some hope when it comes to this stuff." Angela looked back up at me with new found hope in her eyes, so I continued. "Yeah, so she said that a situation will present itself and not to worry about it. Hey, we're still young and have a few more years here at Seattle U., where there seems to be a never ending supply of cute guys." I smiled at her, hoping she would feel better.

She smiled back. "Well, if Alice thinks that a couple of shy girls like us are bound to catch someone sooner or later, I guess I'll just wait it out. I mean, it's bound to happen sooner or later," she said looking over at me while rising from my bed.

I stood also, knowing she was looking for permission to leave and put us both of our misery. "Yeah, well, weirder things have happened," I said.

She walked over to the door ready to leave, but I couldn't let our conversation end on such an awkward note. "So are you coming to the Halloween party tonight? It's supposed to be really fun and your mystery man may be there," I said, fishing for his name while trying to remain nonchalant about it.

"No, I'm going to drive home to Portland for the weekend, but hey, thanks for listening to me rant about my love life. I know it's not really your job, but it did help," she said, letting me off of the hook.

"No problem and hey, my door is always open so feel free to drop by if you need to. Happy Halloween, Angela."

"Happy Halloween, Bella. Good luck with the dorm party tonight," she said before walking out into the hall.

Oh yeah, the dorm party was going to be a hoot. It was sure to be non-stop fun to stand around with the college employees required to attend, and the students who are too socially stunted to be invited to something more fun. Great.

Angela had nearly made me forget what I was doing before she knocked on my door – busy finding something to wear to the aforementioned party. Not only am I required to attend a party that was sure to be the event of the season for socially awkward young adults and my fellow co-workers, but we were being forced to dress up. Double the excitement for me folks! Bring on the mortification. I can't wait.

I don't need any extra reason, especially a lame costume on my part, to not want to attend a party tonight. I mean, my social life is put up on my bookshelf, next to my well worn Harry Potter novels. I don't go out. Ever. I'm only friends with the uber-popular Alice Brandon because I rescued her from the class bully in Kindergarten back in our home town of Forks. She never really left my side after that. I knew people just assumed she took pity on me. They also assumed I had a girl crush on her.

I did nothing to sway the rumors, because I was never one to look for any outside attention. It was hard to escape it though, being the daughter of the local police chief. Not to mention the fact that my mother had up and left us when I was nine. Local gossip had flourished that year, and unfortunately, it never really died down.

I never blamed my mom for wanting escape small town life, it just wasn't like her to be "trapped" somewhere. I didn't leave with her because of the look on Charlie's face when he came home to her packing a suitcase, yelling about his late hours at work.

I had talked to my mom on the phone at night about three times a week since then. When I moved over to Seattle to come to school, I added Charlie as a phone pal and spoke to him about once or twice a week.

I had a pretty routine life around here now. I had three classes on Monday, Wednesday, and Friday, and two classes every Tuesday and Thursday. I talked to my parents on the phone most nights. I went out to lunch with Alice every other day, and she usually dragged me to the mall or on some shopping extravaganza every weekend. I am a routine kind of girl, and it suited me.

Speaking of routine… Ring, ring.

I walked over from where I had been staring into my closet for the last ten minutes, to my phone that was lying on the corner of my computer desk.

"Hi mom," I said into the receiver, not even glancing at the caller ID.

"How do you do that honey?" My mom was so clueless. How could she not know that I have absolutely no life and that the only person that ever calls me on Friday at seven thirty in the evening was her?

"Do what mom?"

"How did you know it was me?"

"My phone has caller ID mom. You know, where it tells you who is calling?"

"Stop making fun of your hare-brained mother, Bella. What are you up to tonight?"

"I've been trying to come up with a quick costume idea from my closet and failing miserably. What are you and Phil up to tonight? Have the trick-or-treaters raided your neighborhood en masse yet?"

Please, oh please don't pick up on the fact that I'm dressing up and ask about my plans.

"You're going out tonight Bella? Where are you going, some frat party? Did you get asked out? Do you have a date for tonight? Tell me everything – is he cute? What's his major?"

Dear lord, it was worse than I thought. Breathe through your nose Bella. In, out. In, out.

"No mom. I don't have a date. The dorm is throwing a Halloween party for the staff and residents and I need to go." I sighed into the phone. She was not going to let this go.

"Oh," she said, sounding somewhat defeated. "So, umm, what are you going to wear? Something sexy maybe? How about a vampire? Just throw on something short and black and wear some pale makeup with red lipstick. That would be a great conversation starter, you know."

"Yeah mom, I don't have anything short or black. I'll just wear my polo from my old job. I've got a whistle to throw around my neck and a matching baseball cap."

"You mean your uniform from last year – the one from the Foot Locker? Why honey? Why don't you throw on that dress I bought you last spring? You could be a, a..."

"A what mom?" I paused, knowing she was trying to come up with a better word for tramp. I would never wear that dress. Ever. "No, the umpire/referee thing is great. I don't want to strike up any conversations – you know how I don't like talking to new people. Anyways, now I'll be dressed up and comfortable at the same time. It'll be great, I promise."

"Oh, alright Bella. Have fun and don't forget to tell me all about it next week," she said.

"Sure thing mom – I'll talk to you on Monday, alright?" She was so predictable.

"Alright honey. Bye," she said before hanging up.

Well, now it was time to suck it up and go down to my own personal form of hell. I quickly threw on my old Foot Locker polo and a pair of black blue jeans. A baseball cap, the whistle, and my trusted Converse sneakers completed the look.

I looked at the full length mirror hanging on the back of my front door before leaving, and smirked at the girl reflected back at me. Tonight should be interesting - very interesting.

A/N: This was a pain in the ass to get out of my head and onto the computer.

Kim – this is for you baby! You told me to "Get Goin'," so I got goin'….. Hope you like it. British Bitches – thank you for inviting me to participate in your smutty advent calendar – Oh and sorry for all of my crap. To Dustin – you are my favorite – you are my muse – you are my everything.

Please review this mother. I like it when you do. Ah lot.