We own nothing. So, since we had so much fin writing our other one-shot for Jandco and WTVOC's contest, we thought we'd try again. Hope you like this one, it's a little more Christmasey than the other. Enjoy and feel free to vote for us!

Imagine Whirled Peas,

The NaughtyPastryChef and mskathy


Sigh. Again? Really?

I could hear Rose and Emmett arguing in the living room. It was just a few days after Thanksgiving, but Alice had already decorated the entire house for Christmas, along with help from my Bella.

The five of us have been through at least a hundred Christmases together, and ever year, the same damn fight. When will they learn?

Bella had been with our family for only around two decades by now. I'm sure this was still 'fresh' for her, but she chose to spend the day shopping with Alice in Port Angeles anyways; she was getting better at listening to me about when not to be around.

Jasper and I were playing in the front room of the house, arguing over mundane video game information when we heard them begin.

"No, Rose, I will NOT."

"Aw, Emmybear, why not?" She was stroking her hand up and down his chest, trying her best to get him to concede.

"Because, Rose, there is no way in Hell I am going to agree to that. Wasn't agreeing to take this syrupy sweet photo enough for you?"

"Emmett, some of these people haven't seen us in years!" She smacked the back of his head at this statement.

"Duh, Rose, it isn't exactly like we've changed at all since the last time.. "

Uh oh, he'd be in trouble for that one. Mistake #1.

"You're right, Emmett, let's just lose touch with all of our friends and family and forget all about updating people on our lives. Who cares, anyways? Nothing ever changes!"

And with a huff, she got up and walked off.

This was worse than in years past and I saw Emmett put his head in his hands and sigh, looking at the floor as if some magical answer would suddenly appear. I still honestly wasn't sure why they bothered to send our Christmas cards, but I was smart enough to know better than to get in the middle of this one.

I heard Emmett bound up the stairs to their room and knock softly on the door.

"Rose, baby, let me in. Let's talk about this. You are being unreasonable." He huffed.

Mistake #2.

I heard something glass shatter against the door and stifled a giggle.

Emmett stomped back down the stairs and into the room to join Jasper and I.

"Em, maybe you should go back up there and try again. She is pretty upset."

In times like this, Jasper bore the brunt of the overflow of emotion coming from the house. He explained to Emmett that he'd have to leave the house soon, if she got any more out of control.

"You don't understand, guys. She wants me.. to.. aggh, I can't even say it out loud. I swear, sometimes these women aren't worth the trouble."

Mistake #3.

Rose had come down the stairs to try and make amends, but was outraged at what she heard from Emmett.

"NOT. WORTH. THE. TROUBLE?" she growled.

Jasper ran from the house, unable to control himself any longer.

I admit it, I was a little afraid (ok, terrified) of what Rose was going to do at that moment.

She stalked over to Emmett and turned her head to me at the last minute.

You should leave; things are about to get.. ugly. She thought, eyes meeting mine.

I was nervous; stay and protect Emmett or leave and save myself?

Don't worry, he isn't in any.. physical danger. I'm just going to teach him a lesson. She was holding back a smirk and pursed her lips together to hold in her laugh.

I gave a short nod and walked out the front door, wandering around the grounds of the house.

Well, this is a new twist to the annual argument.


"Rose, I don't know what you think you're doing, I apologize for saying it wasn't worth the trouble, but really.. "

I couldn't even finish my sentence before I felt a gust of wind and realized Rose had me over her shoulders and was carrying me upstairs.

I felt the bed underneath me as I was let go; damn, she couldn't even set me down? She had to just toss me?

"Emmett, if you think this," she motioned up and down her body, "is not worth the trouble, perhaps you need a strong reminder of just what it is you would be missing without me here."

I was a little afraid and a little turned on by her; Rose wasn't usually this aggressive.

"Well, since you said yourself earlier that nothing ever changes, maybe I do need a refresher course." I winked at her. Two can play at this game. Oh God, I hope we get to play right now.

Her hands at her sides curled into tiny fists, betraying her anger.

"You fucking lay right there, Emmett Cullen. I'm about to give you the best reminder of why I am 'worth the trouble'," she used air quotes to emphasize this last phrase. "Don't move an inch, don't move a muscle, in fact, stop fucking breathing until I tell you do. Do you understand?"

I was scared shitless now. Hell yes. Angry Rosie was HOT Rosie.

"I said," she walked closer, nose against my nose now, "do you fucking understand?"

"Y-yes, Rosie, I un-understand."

"Glad to see I can fluster even Emmett The Great." she smirked at me.


I bared my teeth at Emmett. I wanted him to be afraid of me at the moment. Well, a little afraid and a lot turned on. I smiled again as I thought of how I had convinced Edward to leave the house. I had a little surprise for Emmett; IF he would agree to my demands.

I like lingerie, don't get me wrong, but Emmett is really into kinky, costumed lingerie. So, I had done a little adjusting to my wardrobe while he was out in the hallway making an ass of himself.

I looked at him, laying on the bed not breathing. That must be killing him; he loves my scent. I unbuttoned my blouse to the middle of my breasts and bared one shoulder to him.

"This isn't worth it?"

His eyes grew wide as he realized my plan; strip tease until he can't take it anymore and bends to my wishes. I flipped my golden hair over the bare shoulder and showed him the other, holding my shirt closed.

"Is this worth the trouble?"

I was using my sweetest little girl voice on him, the one that he never could fucking resist. I saw him start to shake.

Leaving my shirt the way it is, I unbuttoned my jeans and let them fall to the floor, showing Emmett the bottoms of the 'Mrs. Claus' outfit I had put on. Red velvet panties, with a black band around the waist and white piping to look like seams. He groaned.

"Would you like to breathe Emmett?"

He nodded vigorously and I let my anger come back.

"You should have fucking thought of that before you pissed me off!" I screeched at him. I could see how much this was getting to him, his pants were tented, making me lick my lips.

I'm just as sex-crazed as the big idiot on the bed sometimes...

I unbuttoned my blouse further but didn't take it off, letting it fall open at my sides. He could see the bra now, red velvet again with fluffy white piping along the top and tiny little straps. I had stolen this little ensemble from Alice, who had bought it for Bella, who refused to wear it and gave it back. So naturally, I was falling out of it.

"Am I still being unreasonable?" I teased, stretching my arms up so he could watch my breasts move a little in the too-small bra. He moaned again and made to get up from the bed.

"Ah, ah, ah Emmett. What did I say about moving? Though... you've been a good enough boy, tell you what. You may breathe again." I watched with delight as he took a deep breath and then another.

He really does love the way I smell.

I was getting pretty turned on myself, I knew that I had to end this torture and quickly; I needed some Emmett lovin'.

I dropped the shirt to the floor and turned to grab something from the top of the dresser. As I did so, I heard Emmett's sharp intake of breath at the view of my backside in these tiny boy shorts. I spun back around and held the object out to him.

"Am I worth it yet? Is having and loving me and my body worth you putting on this hat? Just for me Emmy?" I knew he couldn't resist, so I smiled in triumph as he hopped up off the bed and snatched the hat from my hands, jamming it down on his head.

"You are worth anything in the world, my Rosie."

I felt myself get wetter at the sound of his gravelly, sex voice. Like the goof that he is, he grabbed me by the waist and dipped me low to kiss me thoroughly.

When he released me, my head was dizzy, but not enough to let go of my earlier anger. I wanted to be in charge this time; I wanted to feel powerful. I wanted angry sex. I slapped Emmett hard across the face and watched as his eyes went black with lust.

"STRIP! And if you do a good job and make me like it, you MIGHT get a reward." I sat down on the edge of the bed, unable to resist licking my lips and running my hands teasingly along the tops of my breasts, waiting for the show to begin.


"STRIP! And if you do a good job and make me like it, you MIGHT get a reward."

With that, she sad down on the bed and licked her luscious lips. I've got a few places I'd like those lips to go...

I went over to the CD player and put in something I knew Rose would like. Sure, it was a little fast to strip to, but the lyrics were perfect for this moment. I picked up the remote, walked back to my place in front of Rose and pressed the 'play' button.

You're such a flirt, I know you hurt

And so do I, I empathize

I see you out, you never cared

A conversation that we never shared

I began to run my hands up under my shirt, swinging my hips in time to the music.

But it's so strange, it's something new

Amazing feelings that I have for you

I close my eyes when I'm alone

Wonder what it'd be like to make you moan

I lifted my hands over my head, removing my shirt in one swift movement.

I wanna give you something better

Than anything you've ever had

A stronger and a faster lover

The world, it disappears so fast

My hands went to my jeans and I slowly undid the button, dipping my hand inside the waist and touching myself. I was already hard, the contact of my hand to the tip of my cock made me moan.

Sweet kiwi

Your juices dripping down my chin

So please, let me

Don't stop it before it begins

What I wouldn't do right now, to have Rose dripping down my chin. I pulled my hand out of my pants, noticing Rose was now biting her lower lip, eyes heavy with lust. When she saw my eyes look her way, she slowly licked her lips, up across the top, swiping over and down across the bottom.

So give it up, and don't pretend

And spread your arms and legs across the bed

And when you shake, you won't regret

The things I whisper in your ear

(What?) I said

I shoved my pants down to my ankles and wasn't sure I could control myself anymore. I left my boxers on, stepped out of my pants and stalked toward Rose, who was now laying with her head up at the pillows.

I wanna give you something better

(You wanna give me something better)

Than anything you've ever had

(Than anything I've ever had)

A stronger and a faster lover

(A stronger and a faster lover)

The world, it disappears so fast

(It disappears so fast)

"Emmett, I thought I explained to you that I was in charge..."

Sweet kiwi

Your juices dripping down my chin

So please, let me

Don't stop it before it begins

"... this song has me so turned on, you're about to get a little taste," she giggled, "of your own medicine."

I can't wait to take you home

Fingers through your hair

Kisses on your back

Scratch me with your nails

She moved aside and straddled my chest, pulling my hair as a not-so-friendly reminder of our roles.

"Does Mr. Claus want some of my juices dripping down his chin? Or would this be one of the things that aren't worth the trouble?"

Save me from myself

Show me how to care

Get everything out

Dripping everywhere

Lipstick smeared all over your face

How much longer must we wait?

Don't think that I can wait

I was panting, a totally weird feeling since breath was unnecessary, but that's what Rosie does to me sometimes; makes me forget who I am.

"Rosie, I want to taste you so bad. Please, let me show you how much I need you, how much you're worth it."

At this point, I flipped the CD off, knowing we were all done with the foreplay.

I leaned back to put my head on a pillow, helping me to be at a different angle. Rose tugged my hair a little, using my head as leverage to scoot herself up my body. It didn't really hurt and she knew that, it was just another hot thing she did to throw me off.

"Emmett, I'm going to let you lick me and give me an amazing orgasm. I hope you do a good job, baby, because if you do, I'm going to return the favor and let you have a little fun. If you don't do a good enough job, I just might have to punish you, and not in a way you'd enjoy. Are we clear?"

"Fuck yes."

It was just about all I could muster, with her wet fabric covered slit hovering above my face.

"Good boy."

She ripped away her panties and lowered her body until her knee met the mattress on the other side of my head and I went straight to work. I began slowly, licking the entire length down her cunt, drilling my tongue as deep into her as I could and slipping out to lick up her lips. I settled on her clit, taking it in my mouth, flicking back and forth as I moaned against her.

I used a free hand to rip her bra, freeing her bouncing tits for me to look at. Her hips were bucking against my face; thank god I don't need to breathe. Hah, I wonder if she's thinking the same thing? Focus, Emmett, damn it.

I began to place slow kisses around her clit, swiping my tongue out to run the length of her now and then, knowing I was bringing her close.

"Rosie, baby, can I please be inside you? This is killing me."

Yeah, I begged. Rose being in charge was so hot, she could probably get anything from me at this point.

She smacked me. That bitch. That hot, hot, fucking bitch. I'll take that as a 'no'.

I sucked one of her lips into my mouth and bit gently, not enough to cause her pain, just enough to let her feel it. She ground down against me and I let go with a little laugh, flicking across the top of her clit again, lighter and faster than before, hoping to take her up to her peak.

I reached a hand up and slipped it inside of her, slowly, covering it in her wetness. I withdrew it faster, plunging it back into her a second time, adding a few fingers.

"Oh, Em, yes.. "

"Be careful, Rosie, you wouldn't want to lose control... "

I was teasing her now, I knew she was just around the corner from losing herself in pleasure and I'd be able to get my way.

I pulled my fingers out slowly, circling her entrance with my pointed finger and letting my pinky linger a little farther away from my face, just to her other entrance. Once she felt me at the outside of her ass, she again ground down on me, nearly begging. Who am I do deny Rose?

I moved my pointer, middle and ring finger back inside of her wet pussy and pressed my pinky into her hot ass. She moaned and I felt her cum almost immediately. Without taking my fingers out of her, I moved them back and forth, milking her orgasm, dragging it out as long as I could, while flicking her clit back and forth between my lips. I would moan now and then, knowing the vibrations added to her pleasure.

As soon as I felt her coming down from her high, I gently took my hand away from her body, placing soft, gentle, loving kisses on her pussy.

Her body slumped and she slid down, placing her mouth over mine, tasting herself on my lips, slipping her tongue in to gather more of her taste.

"mmm, Emmett, you did such a nice job, I think you might deserve a reward. Might. Do you have any good suggestions?"

I thought for a second. Was Rose really giving me a wide open permission slip to ask for what I wanted? I flipped us over so that she was underneath me.

"Well, since you said nothing ever changes earlier, how about I show you just how much I enjoy things being the same? I know it might be boring to you, Rose, but there is nothing in the world like fucking you. I am going to put my cock so deep into you and make you scream so loud. Is that what you want, Rose?"

I moved my fingers back down to her opening and teased her, knowing how it would drive her wild.

"Yes, Emmett, I want you to fuck me."

"Okay, Rose, but babe.. I have one condition."

"What? Anything."

Damn, sometimes I even impress myself.

"Once we're downstairs, with all our siblings around, you get to refer to me as Emmett The Great again .. for the rest of the night."

She stopped all movement.

Hm, did I cross the line?

I slowly moved my finger back inside of her, and I could see her eyes close, fighting a war inside of herself. She didn't want to give up control, much less refer to me in a superior way, but what the hell choice did she have now? The all-powerful Emmett has begun his work.

She let out a soft moan and pressed her hips up, taking my finger deeper inside of her.

"Deal. Fuck me. Now." She looked right into my eyes as she commanded me.

Hell yes.

Never one to want to disappoint, I moved my body on top of Rose's and quickly slipped my hard cock into her waiting pussy. She writhed and arched her back, pressing her hips into mine, her nails dragging down my back.

"Harder, Emmett. Fuck me like you mean it." Oh, that's how she wants it?

I took this as a personal challenge and began to really fuck her. I wasn't like Jasper or Edward, all pansied out, afraid to hurt my girl; if you beg me to fuck you hard, I am going to nail you, so that's what I did. I was huffing and puffing as I thrust harder into her. She began to scream my name (didn't I say I'd make her do that?) and I could feel her tightening around me.

"Cum, Rosie, cum for me. I want to feel you cum while I fuck you like only I can."

I knew she liked me to talk dirty, so I obliged and felt her orgasm as soon as I ended my sentence. All Hail King Emmett.

Not 10 seconds later, I shut my eyes tight and felt my own orgasm spill out of me, into her.

I fell to the bed beside her and surveyed the room. Only one broken bed this time; the wall had cosmetic damage from where the posts ran into it every time I thrust, but that could easily be patched.

We held each other for a few minutes, got dressed and made our way back downstairs to finish our stupid Christmas cards. Why the fuck do vamps even need to send these? Shit, how many years can the Volturi stand getting an annual picture before sending someone to off us out of annoyance?


I looked at Jasper and since he couldn't feel any more lust or anger rolling out from the house anymore, we decided it was safe to go in.

As we walked in, Emmett and Rose were sitting on the couch, back to addressing their Christmas card envelopes in silence.

"I don't get it. What exactly happened, Edward?" Bella asked me.


Alice leaned over my shoulder and giggled briefly, resting her hand on me, then whispered "Oh, this is going to be good.. wait until the end, you're going to love it."

"Rose and Emmett were filling out the Christmas cards and envelopes when they began to argue." Edward couldn't hold it in anymore and he began to laugh as he explained.

"Rose.. Rose wanted Emmett to put on a Santa hat while they wrote them out. She thought it was more festive that way." He was in full hysterical laughter now, nearly falling on the floor. I looked at him like he was a lunatic.

"Emmett said no, of course, just like he does every year. This year, he began to dig himself even deeper into the hole of Rosalie anger, though, with a few choice comments. Rose whispered into his ear that, if he wore the Santa hat, he could go upstairs for some fun afterwards, but I guess he was feeling sassy. Rose ran upstairs, Em tried to talk to her, something broke, he came back down and then she came back in, looking wicked and warned me to leave, thankfully. I could still hear them from outside, so I ran further into the forest to call you and Jasper, to let everyone know to stay away for a while. I met up with you guys outside and now here we are.. "

"I can hear it in his head, though, he did it on purpose... apparently 'hot, angry Rosie' sex is the best... oh, and Emmett is The King."

"All Hail Emmett The Great" Rose added from the other room.

The four of us collapsed to the floor in a fit of laughter. Just as we were readying ourselves to sit back up and recompose ourselves, the front door opened.

Esme and Carlisle passed us by, shaking their heads and laughing softly. As they went up the stairs, I heard Esme whisper to Carlisle, "What's gotten into the kids today?"

I saw Emmett nudge Rose from the corner of my eye and she repeated, loud enough so Esme and Carlisle would hear,

"All Hail Emmett The Great"