A not-so perfect forever

Written by Distinctlyforbidden

Co-written by your truly, EdwardisLestat

Summary: It's Christmas time and Alice is on a rampage to make the perfect Cullen Christmas for Nessie. Hilarity ensues... Rated T for steamy situations. Co-written by __. Entry for the 'A very Cullen Christmas' contest.

A Very Cullen Christmas...

Saturday December 20

"Where is the wrapping paper!?!" Alice screeched.

I had never been so up close to see a Cullen Christmas before and for that I was thankful. Alice had gone a little overboard and was determined to make this a perfect first Christmas for Renesmee.

"Alice, she's already had her first Christmas."

"That doesn't count," she said determinedly. "The Volturi ruined it, and so we'll have her first Christmas this year."

I sighed; there was no arguing with Alice. No matter what she always got her way.

"Can you rein her in? PLEASE?" I begged a passing Emmett.

"No way, during any holiday season she's downright scary."

"Should I be sacred?" I asked with mock horror.

He smiled widely. "Terrified."

My eyes grew wide as he walked away. Somehow I knew he wasn't joking.

"Mamma!" I smiled, and turned and scooped up Renesmee.

I was the only person who still called her that. Everyone else simply used her preferred nickname.

Yes, preferred.

When she had said she liked it I gave in.

She touched her small innocent hand to my face and asked me what aunt Alice was doing.

"Alice is being Alice." I explained.

To any outsider it wasn't much of an explanation but to us, it was all the explanation needed.

She nodded and smiled.

I had stopped my over analysis of my daughters accelerated growth a while ago, though in one short year she had developed to look like an eight year old.

Her appearance wasn't that different; she had gained some weight –though I hardly noticed – and added several inches to her previous height.

Alice was beyond peeved that her two year old niece was almost as tall as she was, and had taken to wearing taller heels around the house to make herself seem more authoritative around Nessie.

I continued to gaze at Nessie, and Alice continued to buzz around the house, pulling out garlands and mistletoe and placing them in odd corners of the mansion.

Rosalie and Emmett had taken to a little game.

They would stand under a particular spruce of mistletoe until the other just so happened to walk by. I wasn't sure how it worked exactly but they would always end up christening that area.

The game was put to an end however, when Jasper started to interfere with Emmett's emotions. He would build Emmett's excitement in meeting Rosalie and then devastate it when Emmett came close to her hiding spot.

It ended with a confused Emmett and a very pissed Rose.

Edward, Carlisle and Esme were all out hunting. They hadn't gone in a while and I had lost a game of rock paper scissors to Edward for who had to stay with Alice.

Jacob was busy paying a visit to Billy. Something that was rare now a days.

And I, I was practically alone. What to do?

I decided that an afternoon alone with my daughter was in order.

We decided that a day at the mall would be fun for the both of us. It was a good thing that Renesmee made everything fuzzy in Alice's visions, or else she would crucify us for even thinking of going to the mall without her. She was like one of Pavlov's dogs but instead it was the mere sound of a cash register's bell that had her salivating venom. No, a trip to the mall with Alice would end up being a disaster.

I grabbed a jacket for Nessie and all but ran to the car. The faster we got out of here, the better.


I turned to see Emmett running up to the car. I rolled down the window.

"I have to get out of there. Alice is driving me crazy and Rose is really pissed for some reason."

That reason would be Jasper, I thought.

"Get in."

He obliged and we began driving.

The mall was packed and filled with holiday shoppers. My thirst had gotten considerably better in the past year and I was able to tolerate the hundreds of irritated and exasperated consumers that were trying to find holiday deals.

Nessie is quite the same, Charlie visits quite often and she has learned to control herself around him.

We walked for a while until we came to Toys 'r' Us, Nessie said she had seen a large plush animal that resembled a wolf and demanded I buy it. I honestly didn't understand her infatuation with any type of wolf. Sure she and Jacob were close but it was becoming ridiculous. Edward was becoming concerned that they were too close. It didn't help than she was growing into an adult with every passing day.

After some uncharacteristically loud whining I gave in and bought her the damn wolf. I knew if I didn't I would never hear the end of it, she was becoming more and more like Alice every day.

As I walked the mall my mind tailed to Edward. For a while now I had been wondering what to get him for Christmas, and now I suddenly had an idea.

I stropped in front of Victoria's Secret. I wasn't sure if I should go in, when I has currently holding the hand of a very innocent child.

I looked toward Emmett he was wearing a smug smile.

I raised my eyebrows, as if I didn't know what he was planning with Rosalie.

He laughed and nodded and took Nessie's hand. I sighed and walked in the store.

There was lingerie everywhere.

Bras, panties, thongs, baby dolls, they were in every size and in every colour.

And that, of course was excluding the sprays and lotions and powders.

I didn't need any of that and if I contemplated Edward rubbing anything on my body right now I think I would spontaneously combust.

Good lord! The power that man has over me.

I hadn't even looked at anything and I was already lusting after our next meeting.

I took a breath that I didn't need and proceeded over to the baby dolls.

I looked through most of them, but soon ruled out ones that were completely see through or made in leather, Edward was a silk type of guy.

My final choice left me with a blood red two-piece that was very short and very light.

When I was done I left the store and went to go find Emmett.

Once I found him we headed to Laura Secord.

I bough Nessie an ice cream and we sat down while she attempted to finish it.

Edward and I had been trying to get her to eat more human food so that she could become accustomed to it. If necessary she needed to be able to survive on both blood and the occasional chocolates.

We sat down and she glared at me as she licked the ice cream.

I heard a low chuckle, and Emmett was fighting a smile, he knew it was hard on her but apparently it was so darn funny.

Her little face was crunched up and she furrowed her eyebrows as she tried to finish the cone.

"You know," Emmett pointed out, "most kids would love getting force-fed ice cream."

Renesmee gave him a pained look as she examined the best angle to devour the human concoction.

Emmett laughed louder this time- much to Renesmee's aggravation. She looked up at him, touched his face and smiled.

Emmett's smile was wiped off of his face, he looked a little scared now, and I just had to wonder what she'd shown him.

Nessie just kept her gaze on him, a small smile tugging at her lips and motioned with her head to the counter.

Without another word Emmett got up and went over to the counter. I turned to see him purchase an ice cream and return to the table with a large frown on his face.

He didn't say a word; he just lifted the cone to his lips and, very deliberately, licked it.

I couldn't take it anymore and burst out laughing. The image of a fully grown Emmett sitting there in a chair that was dwarfed by him licking an ice cream was priceless.

Emmett turned and glared at me.

"Oh I'm sure you'll still find it funny when I tell Alice you went to Victoria's Secret without her," he said with a smug smile.

My grin immediately turned in to a grimace, and I scowled at Emmett and his cone.

When we reached home Jasper came to greet us. He quickly assessed our emotions of guilt, disgust, and self-satisfaction and asked what happened.

"Nothing," we all muttered, though Renesmee was a lot more cheerful.

Tuesday December 23

It may have only been a day, but we were all burning inside.

Alice had gone wild.

No not the girl's gone wild version. But the, "if you so much as ruin this Christmas, I will kill you", version.

I was becoming sexually frustrated, I hadn't had any alone time with Edward because of Alice's Elf raids. She was always looking for helpers.

Each respective couple had fled and taken refuge outside of the Cullen home.

Edward and I had chosen to go to our meadow.

Lying in the snowy field, he broke the silence.

"Are you worrying about Nessie again, because you know she's fine with Jake."

I looked up and smiled. It didn't take long for my eyes to become glazed over with lust.

It seemed the closer we got to Christmas, the more I wanted to be close to him.

He dipped his head and stared into my eyes.


My eye's closed as his breath blew into my face.

Even though my senses were more acute, he still smelled the same.

It was ginger and spice and everything nice.

I shook my head and came back to the present.

"No, I just feel guilty about Jasper."

Alice had been looking for him to help with some decorations and had caught him playing cards with the rest of us. We all scattered, but that left Jasper all alone with Alice.

Now, he was ordered to be her personal slave.

"Don't be, I'm sure she's not being too hard on him." He said with a chuckle and wrapped his arms around me.

"Let's hope."


Wow, not even a real word and he had my eyes rolling into the back of my head.

The combination of his smell and the vibrations those syllables caused his body to exert through mine was amazing.

Unconsciously, I turned my head and buried my face in his neck.

What happened next was purely instinct.

"Bella, did you just sniff me?"

If I were human I would be maroon right now.

"Um," I really didn't know what to say. I mean he had to know the effect he had on me right?

I had a decision to make, I could pretend like it never happened or make him wish for more.

I flipped us to that I was straddling him.

"Yes," I said whist I deliberately licked his jaw.

An incomprehensible moan escaped his lips as I trailed lower.

I smiled in the crook where his neck met his shoulder and I could have sworn I felt him shudder.

I smiled wider.

All week he's had this hold on me and now, now it was my turn.

I continued to trail light kisses down his neck and began unbuttoning his shirt to get to his chest.

When I thought back to the last time we had attempted this here I chuckled.

Edward looked down to me and smirked.

Nothing would stop us now, not even ourselves.

I continued my assault on his chest and he wove his hands into my hair, spurring me on.

When I reached his navel he moaned again, but this time I could hear my name embedded in it.

This made my movements wilder and I all but shredded his jeans in my haste to get them off.

I had to catch my breath as Edward was a sight to see.

I already knew this, but the image of him completely vulnerable in nothing but his boxers underneath me made me, well, hot.

All over.

The cold of the snow meant nothing.

We were neither affected by the temperature nor did we care about it.

It was just me and him, him and me, together.

I placed two fingers underneath the waist band of his boxers when I heard some one yell.


My head snapped up as Jacob came into view, followed by my daughter.

No one moved, no one said a word.

I looked down at Edward, my eyes probably screaming fix this, because although Renesmee wasn't that little, I knew she wouldn't fall for the: mommy and daddy were just wrestling excuse.

Jacob seemed to come to his senses and took Nessie's hand and led her back into the forest.

When they were gone we both relaxed, this was going to make an awkward sex talk.

Wednesday December 24

It was only about one hour until Christmas.

After the fiasco in the meadow it had become a little awkward around Jake but we were trying to make it work for Christmas.

All in all everything turned out great. The decorations were beautiful and the house looked even better than usual.

Much to my disappointment, all of Alice's focus on Nessie hasn't negated me from her plans.

I had put up a good fight at first, but when Alice revealed that she had seen me in Victoria's Secret and that if I knew what was good for me I would put on the dress, I gave in.

I was attempting to slide it over my head when Edward walked in.

"Having trouble?" He chuckled.

"No." I said a little harsher than normal.

All of this pent up sexual desire was wearing me down.

"Here," he said a lot closer than I'd expected.

I felt one hand slip around my waist while the other pinned my hands above my head.

My breathing instantly grew shallow.

With several gentle tugs he pulled the dress down and over my head.

"There you are."

"Here I am," I said and learned in to kiss his lips.

I should have known that this would not be an innocent kiss. It was full of implications, too full of lust and longing to be considered 'innocent'.

In all truth it was downright sinful.

He pushed against me and I felt the light tap of the wall slamming into my back.

I loved the feel of his body completely against mine, but I needed more.

I wrapped my legs around his waist and ground my hips into his causing him to groan and attack my neck with kisses.

I weaved my hand thorough his hair as he became more intense and let my head lean back to allow him better access.

He kissed me passionately but soon abandoned the tender sweetness as both of our needs grew.

We kissed and felt and rubbed and soon I absolutely needed him, and I knew he felt the same.

Our frantic rhythm became two bodies' yearning to be closer together.

His hands began to massage the skin visible under my dress and it was all I could do to keep from moaning his name.

His hands rose higher and higher until they reached the bottom of the garment. Edward's frenzied lips didn't let up and kept close physical contact with my skin at all times.

I put all of my effort into carefully unbuttoning his shirt; I didn't need Alice mad at me.

Seeing my intention's, he attempted to do the same with me.

My current position wasn't in his favour and I had to shift slightly.

"Don't rip the dress!" I managed to get out before he damaged it.

He nodded and almost had it slipped over me when the door banged open.

"What are you doing?!"

I turned my head to look at Alice. I was more than a little frustrated.

"Honestly Alice! What does it look like we're doing? Do you mind?" I asked when she didn't move an inch.

"Yes I do mind," she said, and put her hands on her hips, meanwhile tapping her little foot to an angered tempo. "You two have to be down stairs in two minutes, TWO, so whatever you were planning on doing is going to have to wait. Oh and so help me if you've even broken a stitch on that dress, you'll be sorry."

I knew she meant business and the crazed holiday shopper look in her eye confirmed it.

She shut the door and I sighed, I was still pinned to the wall against Edward and I didn't have a problem with that. But by the close contact I could tell he was becoming a little too excited, if you know what I mean.

Edward let me down and we both re-arranged our clothing and went downstairs.

Although we were forced to attend the night was truly perfect.

Edward played Christmas songs on the piano and I chuckled privately every time he struck a sour key. He was clearly more frustrated than I thought.

When we opened some of our presents, I could tell that some of them were spiteful. I only had to guess who got Jacob a leash.

Alice received everything she'd asked for, and someone thought I'd be funny to throw in some Prozac. It wasn't.

I got mostly jewellery, my family's excuse being that it was hard to buy for someone who hated gifts.

When Edward opened my gift to him he froze. I'd thought there was something wrong until he all but jumped me and had to have Emmett pry him off. Charlie wasn't too happy with that, but I had the excuse that we were married.

The rest of the time we spent talking, but mostly we enjoyed everyone's company.

We were together, we were happy, and, for all eternity we were healthy.

Everything was perfect, just as Alice wanted it.

But I knew even if we didn't have the gifts, or the decorations, or even the ham we sent home with Charlie, we'd be happy.

Because it didn't take the materialistic side of Christmas to bring us together.

Alice did.

And as long as we had her there'd be no worries amongst our family's closeness.

Not even mine and Edward's.

Alright maybe a little, but we'd fix that tonight, because we vowed we'd be together forever.