(Infirmary, Two days later, John's POV)
So here I am, once again in the infirmary. This time I'm not so much hurt as weak and cold. I guess it had something to do with the spirit inside me. Yeah, they'd explained everything to me. I was still a little bit lost, but apparently I'd been a bigger pain in the ass then I usually was. Which, according to Rodney, was saying something. They filled me in on everything I'd missed, including my strange behaviors with each of them.
'They' being Ronon, Teyla, Rodney and Carson. It was still a lot to take in, really.
I hadn't seen Elizabeth since it all happened, and was worried, despite the others trying to reassure me she was fine. I rolled my eyes and waited as Carson finished up his exam before hopping off the table. I'd been released and was about to head to the lunch room.
"Just make sure to get plenty of rest, and no training at all." Carson warned me with a concerned look.
I nodded and walked off briskly. As I walked, I thought over everything I'd heard.
The only way the spirit could control me was if I was awake. Somehow, it was able to 'call' to me because of my gene; I don't know how it called to Elizabeth. It only had five days before the body either expired or grew immune to it's presence, casting it out and killing both the spirit and the body. When they'd blasted me, the electrical energy of Ronon's blaster had eliminated all traces of the spirit.
They were going to have me touch the crystal, apparently, only when I woke up and was me again, and Rodney's enhanced bio scans didn't pick up anything unusual, they agreed it was gone.
Rodney later came back and confirmed that the electrical discharge from Ronon's blaster had been too much for the spirit, killing it.
Looking up from my thoughts, I found myself standing outside Elizabeth's room. I knew it was lunch time, but I'd heard all about how we were merely seconds from both more or less dying when Ronon got me. If that bothered her half as much as it bothered me…. I swiped my hand over the crystal.
I opened the door and Elizabeth looked up from her bed, where she was reading. Her eyes went wide a moment before turning wary. "…John…?"
I nodded and raised a hand to wave, even though she wasn't looking at me anymore. She'd turned to her book a moment, her face burning a beautiful pink. "Carson released me, you can check with him if you want to."
Looking up once again, she seemed to stare at me for a long moment, and I couldn't help but feel a little awkward. I don't know what she was seeing, but it seemed to satisfy her fears because she nodded and waved me in. She offered a small, tentative smile.
Walking in a little, I swiped my hand over the control and watched as the door closed before turning back to her and leaning against the wall next to it. "How're you doing?"
She raised an eyebrow and closed the book. I saw it was 'Twilight', though I wasn't familiar with it. She must've seen my look. Holding it up, she raised an eyebrow. "It's hitting a little too close for comfort." She stated dryly. "It's about a young woman who moves to a new city and meets a strange young man. Everything about him is inhumanly beautiful, and she can't help but be attracted, even when she knows she should be afraid. Turns out he's a vampire. They end up falling in love." She winced and marked her spot before putting the book aside.
"That's what happened?" I was referring to the whole strange attraction and all that. I noticed my voice was very soft. A lot of it had been like a dream, and it was fading from my memory even as we spoke. I had no idea what I said or did, but according to the others I'd been quite the jerk. I seemed to recall Elizabeth blushing a lot, and acting…strange.
She nodded a little, a blush staining her cheeks. Patting the bed at her side, she waited for me to join her before looking over. "What about you? What's the last thing you remember before…?"
"I couldn't sleep…again." I rolled my eyes. "I went for a walk, and I don't know why, but when I passed the jumper bay, I ended up going inside. I think I went to see if they'd moved the sarcophagus." Frowning for a moment, I struggled to remember. It all seemed so long ago. "There was a girl… One of the night watch marines…" I couldn't help but hesitate, feeling my own face warm up. "She was so…"
"Beautiful?" Elizabeth looked torn between being hurt and amused, seeing as how it's the same thing she went through.
I nodded. "I couldn't help but be attracted to her." Wincing a little, I sighed. "I didn't even know her name." Not that, that's stopped me before. Why did the idea bother me now? Why did talking about it bother me? Maybe... Maybe because I'd come to appreciate Elizabeth in a sense I'd never imagined, and maybe because I didn't actually feel any romantic feelings for the night watch girl?
"Marie Brown. One of the marines was her brother, Mark, and the other was Corporal James D'Amico." Elizabeth winced and turned to three small data pads. "I've compiled letters to their families, but their bodies are going to be cremated."
"Better than sending back mummies." I muttered with a wince, knowing it would be a low blow to the families.
Elizabeth nodded, her face pained. "Are you alright?"
Shaking my head, I leaned it against her shoulder. "No, you?"
She sighed and remained quiet.
Frowning after a moment, I pulled away and looked up. Her face was screwed up in clear thought; her red hair falling softly against her throat and her blue eyes clouded over with countless emotions I couldn't name. "Elizabeth?" I watched as she jumped a little and looked at me, blinking in surprise. "Are you ok?" I repeated quietly, unable to tear my eyes away from hers. I'd always known how beautiful her eyes were, but at this close range, I could make out tiny golden flecks in the blue. I could see how flawless her face was, and the depths of the emotions she was feeling etched into every inch of it.
Her eyes remained surprised and seemed to dart all over my face. Maybe it was how close our faces were. I could feel her warm breath ghosting across my cheek, smelling like peaches. Her blue eyes were wide, and finally, they locked on mine. Her lips puckered a little, as if she wanted to say something, and I watched her tongue dart out to lick at her bottom lip.
Swallowing heavily, I leaned forward a little, not entirely sure what was going on. I'd never been so bold, but I really wanted this. Her eyes seemed to close a little and she, too, leaned towards me, her hand coming up from the bed to rest on my cheek as her warm lips locked on mine. Everything kind of faded out. All that seemed to matter or register were the warm lips moving across my own, and the even warmer hands that wrapped around my neck.
I didn't even hesitate, but began kissing her back, wrapping my own arms around her waist. Yes, I definitely wanted this. Hell, I think I've wanted this for a long time. It felt so right. I allowed the kiss to deepen, letting her keep control and relaxing. I lost track of how much time past, but I pulled away after a few moments, breathing heavy and with my eyes locked on her lips. Reluctantly, I tore my eyes from her lips and raised them to her face, noting her worried expression. "…Elizabeth?"
"You are John…?"
The question was obvious in her voice, and I remembered the others explaining how the spirit reaper, as they'd chosen to call it, tended to travel. "If I wasn't, I think you'd know by now." I stated, feeling my own face warm up as my voice came out a little more breathy than I'd have liked. She didn't look reassured, and I leaned forward, closing my eyes and kissing her lightly. As I pulled away, I stared into her eyes firmly. "I'm John."
She stared into my eyes and nodded a little, finally looking reassured. Her eyes twinkled a little, suddenly, and a smirk played at the corner of her lips. "I don't know. I might need a little more reassuring." Her cheeks turned a deep red, and she ducked her head a little.
Grinning, I leaned forward and pressed my forehead against hers lightly. "Hmm… I think I can do that." I chuckled quietly, pulling her close and hugging her tightly. I could definitely get used to this.
Things had been so confusing. This whole situation made me think of everything I'd ever thought I'd known about John. First of all, I was so sure I loved Simon, but ever since meeting John, things had been different. I felt strongly attracted to him, but was so sure it was just lust, or maybe a crush at best. Maybe...it was just loneliness. Then, things began to change. I didn't look at Simon in the same light. I didn't look at John in the same light.
John was brave, loyal, funny, a real smart ass, smart, kind, resourceful... I could go on forever.
Hell, I found out I'd been spending a lot of time comparing aspects of Simon to aspects of John, whether it was physical or mental.
Either way, slowly, John had been pulling out ahead, bit by bit. I'd had feelings for him all along, I just never wanted to admit it to myself. I had no idea if the regulations would allow this, but at this very moment, it wasn't a priority on my list. If I had to look on the bright side of everything that had happened, this spirit reaper made me realize how much I cared for John.
As John walked into my room, I noticed that even without the spirit in his body, he was still incredibly beautiful to me. His face was finally back to normal color, and his eyes not so bright, but still beautiful. No, more beautiful, because they were his eyes. His smile was warm and friendly, the one I'd gotten used to. This was my John again. It was comforting.
When we kissed, I was certain he'd pull away. I never really thought he had feelings for me like that. When he kissed me back, my heart soared. Things are so different now, and I know we're not out of the woods yet. Still, for the moment, I was content to lay in John's arms, relaxing at his side. Later, I could give Sam a call and see what she knew about the regulations.
One thing was for certain... I could definitely get used to this!
Hope you like it.
Written November 19, 2008