Disclaimer: I don't own Naruto. But I will one day…They'll see…They'll all see! Nothing can stop me! Nothing! BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA…!

Nin Tech
Chapter 1: Say Hello to Naruto, Mad Scientist
By Irritus185

It was a normal day in the city of Konohagakure, the sun shining down as it traveled its celestial path. People walked the streets, performing whatever various chores they had or needed to do.

Birds chirped, the leaves rustled, and a young, blonde child was running for his continued safety from a group of very angry and very sooty civilians.

Sadly enough this actually was a common occurrence, including the obscenities, slurs, and death threats that were being thrown at the young boy as he ran as fast as his short five year-old legs could carry him.

"Come back here, you demon!"

"We'll get you for all the trouble you've caused!"

"Ya have ta catch me first, ya slimy bastards!"

If there was anything that Naruto had learned from his constant run-ins with the citizens of Konoha, it was a broad and deep grasp of the more…colorful parts of language.

He also learned that if he didn't pick up his speed, the people behind him were going to catch up with him rather quickly. And that would lead to another something he had learned early in life – pain.

He had come to the quick conclusion that he did not like pain.

However, for the first time since he could remember, this was a time that Naruto was actually being chased and cursed out for something that he knew for a fact he did. To be honest, despite the fear percolating through his brain and the adrenaline deadening the soreness in his leg muscles, he was actually enjoying the feeling of being blamed for something he did.

Before, people would just ignore him, ostracize him or, if they paid any attention at all, lob verbal and physical abuse in his general direction. But now…now…

They were recognizing him for something he had done!

It was just too bad that what he had done was cause a localized area of drunken hysteria.

The event had been the release of built-up tension accumulated over his, admittedly short, life. Naruto was tired of being picked on, tired of having others dumping their frustrations upon him, tired of being turned into the whipping boy for any who decided that he was at fault for any misfortune brought into their lives.

What had sped up the process was that today had been a particularly bad day for the young lad.

First he had woken up to discover that whatever instant ramen he had left had gone bad. The growls and gelatinous appendages that emerged from the containers gave proof to that. Luckily all it had taken was a good few stomps, but that lowered the chances of them being edible from 'perhaps maybe' to none at al all.

Next, when he had left his apartment building – his apartment building (Jii-san had given him a whole building! Was that cool or what?) – he had been splashed with a mixture of water and mud by a trio of large dogs bounding down the street after a cat, a slightly older girl with strange markings on her face chasing frantically after them.

Those clothes had been relatively clean too!

Then Ichiraku's had been closed for the day. Apparently Teuchi, the shop owner, was having trouble filling an order for the rotund Akamichi clan. So he wasn't even able to get breakfast from there. Naruto's stomach had not been happy about that. It scared a little girl with lavender, doe-like eyes away as it roared for sustenance.

Then when he had walking to a local market to perhaps buy some cheap grub, he had tripped over what seemed to be a large anthill before tumbling down the hill and then smack-dab into a wall when the road spilt. To make matters worse, those ants had attacked him! He still had the bite marks, even though he had the tendency to heal fairly rapidly.

Then when he finally had reached the convenience store, he discovered that their instant ramen supply was currently non-existent as there had been some complications during the stocking and all of it was destroyed beyond repair.

Naruto didn't know what a "monotone-dichromatic-pocky-addict" was, but he did know that it had to be bad if the creature had wiped out all pocky reserves by itself and ramen just happened to be unfortunate collateral damage.

So now, there he was – hungry, cranky, ramen deprived, itchy, noodle denied, and quite honestly pissed. Oh, did we managed he really wanted his ramen now?

So when he came upon a bar, he absently noted that there were already people in it, even though it could have barely been past noon at that point. His interest was piqued further when he recognized some of them as the jerks who had decided at one, interval of time when they were wasted, to lay a few goose eggs on his skull.

Now normally Naruto tried to stay clear of these kinds of people. They obviously had no problem with attempting to harm him, even with all the warnings that those cool ANBU guys gave every time they tried something. But something had changed – something pivotal.

Naruto was angry and decided that some revenge was in order.

You step on the fox's tail, and you end up the one cursed.

Naruto may not have known this, but he was actually quite the large fox.

And his tail had been stepped on plenty of times.

It doesn't take a genius to figure out what happened next.

It did take a smoke bomb Naruto had filched off the last ANBU who had saved his hide to create the disturbance.

Ninja tools were very much awesome.

Which now brings us back to the present of Naruto running from the mob of civilians - the drunk, hacking, smoking mob of civilians

A smile formed behind the animal mask of the ANBU watching the whole debacle from rooftops. Really, the Kyuubi kid really could cause some chaos when he wanted to, but at least this time it was against people that were well-deserved of it.

Surprisingly Naruto was actually keeping a fair distance between him and the group. Even though he was obviously less physically fit than the adults in pursuit, their shaky equilibrium and lingering irritation from the smoke bomb was putting them all on equal footing. The ANBU would only interfere if he felt like the situation required it, and he truly felt like the kid was holding his own.

When the front of the crowd careened into a stand after sliding on the marbles the boy had stealthily left on the street, causing a huge chain reaction that left the entire crowd cursing and moaning in aggravation, the dog-masked individual decided that, yes indeed, the boy would do alright.

But, oh dear, those men up ahead did not look kind at all…

Naruto let out a giddy laugh as he watched his pursuers end up in a dozen person pile-up. Oh man, that was great! He had never had so much fun in his life! If this was what it was like to screw around with others, he could do this for a long time!

Not looking where he was going, Naruto let out a pained gasp of air as he rammed into something very big and very solid. He crashed backwards onto his butt, wincing at the fall. It wasn't even a second later that someone grabbed him by the scruff of his neck and yanked him up and off his feet.

"Hey, punk." The voice belonged to a vicious looking man, a scar running down his eye. He was accompanied by a couple other men, each one looking just as dangerous as the first. "What do you think you're doing, running into me? Now look, you ruined my clothes!"

Naruto gulped. "I-I-I don't-"

"Don't think aniki's gonna let you off so easily!" One of the other men exclaimed. "Yer gonna haveta pay him back for damaging his outfit!"

"B…but I don't…"

"That's right, ya little brat. You're going to pay me back for my ruined clothes. I think five hundred thousand ryou sounds fair, don't you think?"

"Five hundred thousand?!" Naruto squawked. "I don't have that kind of money!"

"Oh? Too bad. Guess I'll just have to get it some other way, huh?" The man sneered, the tip of his tongue poking from the corner of his mouth. His reached into his pocket, pulling out a kunai. Carefully, almost lovingly, he drew it across Naruto's face, tracing the whisker-like marks. "How about I give you a couple more tattoos like these?"

"Hey, ani." The last hoodlum said suddenly.

"What is it?"

"I recognize that kid. Yeah, yeah! It's the demon brat! Ya know, the one who…"

"Oh…you're right! How convenient! Say, you think they'd give a bounty for his head?"

"Nah, probably wouldn't give much."

"That's only if we go through the legal channels, idiot. But I'm sure there are some people who'd be willing to part with some of their hard earned cash if they knew we were the ones to get rid of the fox brat."

Naruto, hearing their rather gruesome conversation, did the one thing he could do – he started to thrash. "Let me go, ya assholes! Let me go!"

"Oh, we wouldn't do that. You're our meal ticket. Why would we-gurk!"

"Aniki!"

"Ani!"

The head hoodlum glared at Naruto in unadulterated fury and agony, the boy's foot lodged squarely between his legs.

Naruto stared back with just as much ferocity. "I told ya to let me go!"

It is said to never underestimate a cornered fox. It is heavily implied to never underestimate a cornered fox with the proper access, at the proper level, and possessing the proper limbs to heave your family goods back to where they originated from.

Obviously the man had never heard of either of these sayings. Pity, as they're pretty important ones to follow, especially when your village's history revolves around such an animal.

The man coughed, his voice elevating into a soprano. "Kill the little son-of-a-bitch! Rend him from ear to ear!"

Naruto took a step back as the remaining two pulled out kunais of their own. Well, crap, he couldn't exactly run away from this. It was by pure luck and a couple of ingenious maneuvers that he had gotten away from the last crowd. But these guys were fresh, pissed, and, most importantly, not viewing the world through a monochrome kaleidoscope.

Oh yeah, he was more or less screwed.

"Yare, yare, this looks like a problem, doesn't it?"

The men paled as a black-clothed ANBU instantly appeared between them and Naruto. His dog mask reflected the sunlight, creating a visage that was both cute yet insanely creepy at the same time.

"Why don't you young men run along now? I'm sure you can make better uses of your time other than bullying Naruto-kun here."

The leader hissed as he got up on one knee. He knew about ANBU. It was impossible not to know about the black-ops teams that helped to run Konoha and supported the Sandaime Hokage from behind closed curtains. However, he couldn't just let the brat to get away unpunished. His manhood demanded it.

Actually his manhood demanded he'd see a doctor immediately. One of them felt like it was about to pop.

"Don't be afraid of this guy! Look at him! He's smaller than us!"

Indeed, the dog ANBU looked like he was barely pass his teens, nearly a foot shorter than them even with that unruly mop of silver hair. Emboldened by their boss's words, the two leapt forward, brandishing their kunai with reckless abandon and with no form or style at all.

"Yare, yare." The ANBU put a hand to the back of his head as he shook it. "Why is it that idiots never take the advice of others?"

"Looks like you're the idiot here!" With that, the two stabbed forward, catching the elite nin in the torso. Their glee was quickly cut short when his body poofed into a log. "Huh?"

"You two can take a nap now." The ANBU slashed his hands backwards, cracking them both of the back of their necks. With nary a sound, the two collapsed into sweet unconsciousness. The shinobi turned to the ringleader. "And as for you…" He forebodingly cracked his knuckled and advanced on the man.

Thus followed one of the most delightful ass-kickings Naruto had ever been privileged to watch and not be part of. When the ANBU was finished making a human-version pretzel, he clapped his hands together and walked back over to Naruto.

The boy grinned. "Thanks, Inu-nii-san!"

The man held back a chuckle at the endearment. "No problem, Naruto-kun." He ruffled the boy's hair. "Oh, but before I forget, the Hokage wanted to talk to you."

"Sarutobi-jii-san? About what?"

"He didn't say."

"Oh…well…" Naruto's eyes narrowed as suspiciousness filtered through his mind. On one hand, the ANBU had saved him, just like the man's comrades had saved him many times before. However, he was still one of Konoha's ninja, and they tended to treat him worse than the normal citizens did. Still…he eyed the man up and down. He was short enough. Naruto was pretty sure he could reach with his foot…He nodded. "Okay then!"

"Right." The ANBU hoisted Naruto up onto his shoulders, capriciously smiling at the yelp of surprise the young boy gave, before creating a quick hand seal than shunshinned him into the Hokage's tower.

Naruto's eyes widened as he boggled at the distance they had just crossed. That was awesome! Ninjas could do those sorts of things? If he had the ability to travel like that whenever he wanted, he'd never have to worry about people chasing him again. He could just 'swoosh' his way out of there and leave all of them in his dust! Naruto turned to tell the ANBU just how cool that was, but was surprised to see that he was already gone. He shrugged. Well, maybe he'd see Inu-nii-san again.

Fate was funny that way with him.

NTNTNTNTNT

Up in the celestial realm, Fate slapped a hand on his knee as he fell into tumultuous laughter. Oh, he was going to have so much fun with that boy. Now if he could only get Lady Luck to relinquish even the slightest hold she had on Naruto.

The woman was so possessive when it came to him.

NTNTNTNTNT

Naruto literally kicked in the double doors to the Hokage's office, loudly announcing his arrival. "Sarutobi-jii-san! You wanted ta see me?"

The god of shinobi looked up from the paperwork, a pleasant smile etched onto his face. It was always such a pleasure to talk with Naruto. The boy was constantly in a state of hyper joy and glee, at least when the reality of his life didn't weigh on his shoulders. Now if he could only keep his decibels below the level of a shuriken on sheet metal, he would be even nicer to be around.

"Hello, Naruto. How have you been?"

Naruto plopped into the chair in front of Sarutobi's desk, his frame comically tinier than the furniture. "I'm great! I just played this awesome prank on some bastards who used to beat me up. It was hilarious!"

Sarutobi filed that fact away for future references. He really had to do something about the people who consistently ignored his laws dealing with Naruto. Perhaps he could convince Ibiki to hold a few private demonstrations on the ability to keep one's mouth shut? Maybe that Mitarashi girl could help as well? She was inordinately good at getting people to follow her sugar-and-blood coated suggestions.

Or she could just burst their minds with sex appeal. Either way worked for him.

"Really? That's not very nice."

"But jii-san!" Naruto whined. "They deserved it!"

"Maybe they did, but that doesn't give you the right to enact vengeance on them."

"Hmmph. Still think it was a good thing to do."

"Now, Naruto, you have to promise me that you won't do something like that again."

The blonde was quiet, refusing to meet Sarutobi's eyes. He had his cheeks puffed out, his arms crossed in what was quite the adorable pout.

"Naruto…"

"Fine."

"So do you promise?"

"I promise I'll think about it."

The Hokage sighed. Well, he supposed that was the best he could do. Knowing Naruto, and more specifically the boy's parents, the stubborn streak he showed would not decrease by any means. He would just have to take the boy's words and hope for the best.

After all, how much trouble could one boy cause?

NTNTNTNTNT

Lady Luck passed off the bottle of vodka to Fate as she watched the timeline. She was already good and plastered by this point. Really, why did people always underestimate the flux of chaos? It only served to bite them in the ass later. Hmm…She glanced at Fate who was already succumbing to the treachery of alcohol.

A bite in the ass…Sounded like fun…

NTNTNTNTNT

"So why did ya wanna see me?" Naruto idly fidgeted in his seat. He found it so stuffy in the Hokage's room. Papers and scrolls and paintings and other things; why couldn't Sarutobi have cooler things like ramen…or ramen…

Or maybe some ramen?

Ignoring the drool collecting at the corner of Naruto's lips, Sarutobi mildly shook his head. "No real reason. I just thought I'd catch up with you. I haven't seen or talked to you for a month or so since I've been busy with my duties." He folded his hands together and leaned forward, his triangular kage hat dipping down. "So how are things?"

"They're fine. I'm doing well in my apartment. It's a bit lonely being the only one living there, but it's also cool since I can do whatever I want and no one will yell at me either."

"That's all well and fine, Naruto," the older man chided. "But you have to take care of that building. It's yours, and you have to learn to treat what belongs to you with dignity and respect. Do you understand?"

"I get it, ji-ji." Naruto decided not to tell Sarutobi about the several holes he had punched through the walls when he was chasing earlier versions of his mutated ramen cups. He was sure those wooden beams weren't all that important, right?

"What else?"

Naruto continued to explain how his life had been going. He deliberately left out just how badly he was treated by Konoha's citizens at times. He would only worry Sarutobi because of it. Besides, he promised the kage that he would think about what he had done and his pranks. And if Naruto was anyone, he was a person who kept his promises.

He thought about it.

And he decided to screw them.

Unconsciously, his smile took on several foxy qualities as Naruto continued to babble about his daily schedule.

Teuchi-jii-san and Ayame-nee-chan were fantastic. They gave him ramen on tab. On tab! He could actually pay them later for ramen today! To Naruto, that immediately elevated their status to people he would take an explosive note for. Oh, and the fact that they treated him like a human being and not just some kind of trashy nuisance helped too.

Ayame still couldn't help but glomp the boy every time he showed up, cooing about how adorable his whisker marks and fur-like hair was. Naruto was her personal snuggle-toy. Wisely, he decided that it wasn't that bad of a role.

Sarutobi couldn't help but smile at the animated way that Naruto spoke. He knew that the boy had had a difficult life. The townsfolk misguidedly blamed him for something beyond his control, the council believed him to be the demon that was imprisoned inside of him, and he was living on his own when no child actually should. Naruto was strong, but at the same time weak. Sarutobi was just glad that the boy wasn't allowing his weaknesses to overcome him.

Their reunion was interrupted when the office doors suddenly swung open, a tall man with sharp eyes entering the room. "Hokage-sama, there is something urgent I must discuss with you."

Sarutobi blinked. Really, he couldn't believe the arrogance of the man. Then he rid himself of that notion. Of course he could. The Uchihas were all a bunch of pompous windbags; the only people with a stick further up their collective asses was the Hyuuga clan. And being the head of the clan, Fugaku was the biggest jackass of them all.

Really, strong bloodlines weren't a substitution for common courtesy.

"What is it, Fugaku-san?"

"It's something I must discuss with you privately." He threw a glance at Naruto, his eyes narrowing perceptively and his nose twitching as though he had looked upon some rotten carcass. "You should probably rid the room of those not needed."

Naruto instinctively put the man at the top of his shit-list.

"I'm sure whatever you have to say could be explained in the company of others. You did barge in on our meeting, after all."

Sarutobi relished the flash of irritation that appeared and disappeared on the Uchiha patriarch's face. Ha! It looked like the man was constipated! Which probably wasn't far from the truth as the Uchihas thought it "noble" to have as much emotional range as a mentally scarred boulder.

Back-up and all that.

Fugaku had the good grace not to follow his initial prerogative and try to threaten the leader. This was much too important to try and ruin otherwise. The very fate of the Uchiha clan depended on it. "It has to do with my eldest son…"

"Oh, what about Itachi?"

"It would appear that his…luxuries have gotten the best of him again."

"You mean that…?"

"I'm afraid so."

Sarutobi sighed and rubbed his temples in a circular fashion. He could already feel the oncoming migraine. He needed to up the dosage on his painkillers. They just weren't getting the job done recently. "Who was it this time?"

"It was a store that belonged to the Akamichi clan, sir."

The Hokage froze. Oh…crap. That was a problem. He quickly looked at Naruto. "I'm sorry, Naruto, but we have to cut our talk short. This is something that requires my full attention."

Naruto shrugged. "No problem, jii-san. I'll see ya later, okay?"

"Yes, well…" Sarutobi's words died in his mouth when he noticed the glass of water on his desk. Ripples were beginning to bud their way out from the center. Oh dear, that close this fast? "Well, then, I'll see you again, Naruto. Take care!"

"See ya!"

Naruto leaped out of the chair. Before he exited the room, he turned to Fugaku's back. Feeling incensed by the man's behavior, he pulled an eyelid down and flipped him the bird. He didn't know what the gesture meant, but figured that it was an appropriate one. It took Sarutobi all he could not to react to the scene. When Naruto did finally leave, he was almost shoved to the side as a very large and round man barged his way into the office. He could hear shouting when the doors closed.

"Hokage-sama…! You!"

"Now, Chouza, I'm sure we can discuss this rationally…"

"Rationally, that asshole's spawn completely wrecked my store!"

"As if your relatives needed any more reason to eat."

"The Akamichi clan is not fat, we're pleasantly plump!"

"Plumped ass is more like it…"

"Why you…!"

Several flashes of black dashed through the door, including the receptionist who decided it would be much more entertaining to watch the inevitable scuffle than listen from outside. Naruto cocked his head. Adults were so weird…He just didn't-

A thought struck him. If most of the ANBU were busy trying to calm down the infraction between the two clan heads, that meant he was free to go look around. He could go exploring! He rarely had the chance to do that, as he was always escorted out of the tower whenever he was done.

It's a sad fact, but his childish logic was true. People were more worried about what destruction could be wrought between the fight of two clan heads than what could be caused by a small child with a mind like a malleable steel trap and several astral tons of chakra lodged in his coils.

Yeah, that would cost them.

Naruto walked down the hallways, noting that the tower was just like any other building, and especially his – it was big, empty, and smelled of musty farts. He stopped when he came upon a large door. Peeking inside, he sneezed when dust invaded his nostrils. Eyes widening, he stepped inside.

Whoa…There were so many scrolls around! There – on the table, under the table, shoved in the scrollcases, rolling on the floor; they were everywhere! This must have been Sarutobi's private library. This was where all those cool jutsu that the old man knew was kept. Being at such a young age, Naruto didn't know much about ninjas or their various techniques, but to his underdeveloped psyche, only one thing stood tall – ninjas were cool, and thus their techniques were cool as well.

Naruto grabbed the nearest scroll to him and opened it up, his wandering eyes roving all over. It was awesome, it was great, it was amazing, it was…

Unreadable. Oh, wait, that's right. He couldn't read just yet. He was only five. He hadn't even entered school.

Sighing, Naruto threw the scroll away. That killed the suspense and intrigue for him. No matter how powerful any of the jutsu may be, they wouldn't do a lick of good if he couldn't understand them. Sighing again, he decided to just leave. Maybe he could find a store that actually had some ramen in it.

As he turned, his foot caught on a wayward scroll, causing Naruto to pitch forward and crash into the end of one of the scrollcases. Scrolls and dust were scattered everywhere, creating a sneezing and coughing fit the likes of which he had never had before. When it finally cleared, he sniffed, groping at the floor to try and pull himself up.

His hand came upon something stiff and leathery.

Blinking, Naruto looked closer. There was something lodged behind the case. He gave an experimental yank and fell back, the object clutched in his tiny hands.

It was a book. Not a scroll, but a book. It was huge, a monolith of literature, about a foot long and four inches thick with a hard, leather-bound cover. It also weighed a ton! He was surprised he was able to grab it in the first place! On the cover was a picture of what looked to be a spark of lightning, surrounded by letters he obviously could not decipher.

Opening the book up, he skimmed the pages, his eyes widening with each sheet flipped. This was…this was…This book had pictures! And really neat looking pictures at that! He had no idea what any of the strange contraptions were, but they seemed like they would be really fun to play with if he ever found them.

Something clicked in the back of his mind. Sarutobi-jii-san wouldn't mind if he borrowed this, right? He had so many scrolls, and this book was forgotten behind the shelves. No one would care if he took it.

Nodding at this train of thought, Naruto shoved the book into his pants, covering it up with his shirt. No point in not taking precautions, right?

Precautions for what? Theft?

Naruto ran out of the library and out of the tower, heading for home. He had some reading to do!

NTNTNTNTNT

Fate snored drunkenly as he rested against Lady Luck's breasts. The Lady didn't even care as she was rather inebriated as well. And why shouldn't they be? They had just changed history! They deserved the break.

Oh, wait, you mean they weren't supposed to do that?

Eh, oh well.

NTNTNTNTNT

Another day came. The sun shined through the windows of the apartment room, landing on a tanned face. The recipient of the day's blessing grumbled in agitation, cuddling further into the cool, hard metal against his cheek.

"Don't wanna get up just yet…"

A high, tinny voice broke him from his ephemeral slumber. "Boss, ya gotta wake up. It's morning."

"Go 'way." He absently swatted a lightly tanned hand at whoever was bothering him

"Boss!" No answer. "Okay then, boys. Boss doesn't wanna get up. Initiate 'Wake-Lazy-Ass-Up' protocol."

"BOSS! GET UP!"

With the sound of a million sirens suddenly cutting through the morning air, Naruto awoke abruptly, holding his hands to his ears in a futile attempt to blot out the noise. When it slowly cut off, he turned his head to the cause of the cacophony.

There stood a miniature version of himself. Barely a foot tall, the robotic Naruto looked at him with neon blue eyes, the letter 'A' soldered onto its chest and a wire trailing from its backside. The loudspeaker sunk back into its chest, the compartment around it closing as it did. It opened its rounded mouth, looking like a cheap ventriloquist doll.

"Good morning, boss."

"Morning, A." Naruto yawned. He glanced at the turbine engine he was holding onto, his right hand dug deep inside if it with a screwdriver stuck in his fingers. He retrieved his hand, cracking the joints to gain back feeling. "What time did I fall asleep last night?"

"It was this morning, boss. You've only had a few hours sleep."

"Oh, really?" He yawned again, adjusting the goggles so that they were perched on his forehead instead of in front of his eyes. He had been slaving over the new engine for the main breaker. If he could only figure out the input-to-output ratio, he could make the Naru-kuns' efficiency rise ten-fold! "Status report?"

Another Naru-kun waddled over, this one with a 'K' on its chest. "All Naru-kuns are in satisfactory condition, boss. The house's security measures have not been breached, and all experiments are stable. There was a slight increase in energy usage at 500 hours for a few minutes, but it's nothing that exceeded the safety limits."

"Anything else?" He grabbed the turbine and turned it over, looking for that last bolt he had been working on.

"Experiment G-11 escaped its holding cell earlier."

He raised an eyebrow. "And?"

"It ate Naru-kuns I through J until we were able to detain it and dig them out. They were not exceedingly damaged."

"Just give her some ramen. That usually calms the sweetie down. I'll go down there later and have a talk. If she wanted to get some fresh air and exercise she could have just told me."

"You have been ignoring it and its friends lately, boss."

Naruto shrugged. Deciding that he had done enough with the turbine, he set it carefully down and stretched his arms. Grinning at the pops that accompanied his joints moving out of place, he settled down and tightened his hand into a fist. He took a deep breath. Ah, he loved the scent of toasted iron and oil in the morning. It was such a great thing to wake to!

"Today feels like a good day…FOR SCIENCE!"

He was echoed by several other Naru-kuns who began to pop up here and there after his declaration, their higher-pitched versions of his voice in agreement.

"For science!"

"For science!"

"For sci-!"

Naru-kun A's statement was cut off as its head exploded.

Naruto blinked again as oil and hydraulic fluids slid down his face and shirt, soot floating around the air. A's distinct lack of a head bled out fluids as sparks ignited at random. The other Naru-kuns watched as Naruto formed a crooked smile at the spectacle.

"Er…I can fix that."

"We know, boss!"

NTNTNTNTNT

Iruka groaned as he scanned the room full of genin-hopefuls. They were there to pass the exam and become full-fledged ninja. He could taste the anticipation each of them exuded with an anxious aura. After all, the final exam was tomorrow, and it determined whether or not they would make it to the next step of their "education." Such young children, and they were to become licensed killers at the age of twelve.

But that wasn't what was bothering Iruka. It was the person who wasn't there that was the cause of the large lump forming in his chest.

Naruto Uzumaki, the jinchuuriki of the Kyuubi no Kitsune.

Iruka knew that Naruto wasn't a bad kid, per se. He was actually quite the nice boy. He wasn't at all like the demon that had nearly destroyed their village years ago. He knew pain, knew suffering…even if most of his self-inflicted suffering was a dearth of ramen.

The boy was the class clown, screw-up, and overall dead last. But it was his status as the trickster of Konoha that brought the most annoyance to the chunin teacher.

Painting the Hyuuga estate neon orange? TP-ing the entire financial section? Letting loose all of the Inuzuka's ninken on a wild and destructive chase through Konoha after a cat? A fake cat at that?

What the hell would the boy do next?

"Yaha! See if you can catch me, ya jerks!"

Something orange flew through the open window to the classroom, followed by two black objects. The orange blur melted into a young blonde in orange clothes, cruising on a board that effortlessly floated above the ground. The blonde's eyes widened in shock as the board refused to slow down, and he crashed into the opposite wall with a loud 'bang.'

Naruto picked himself up from the ground. "Damn, I really need to work on a way to put brakes on this thing." His frown turned into a grin as he turned to the people who had been chasing him. "Thanks for the escort, ANBU-sans! I think I can look after myself now!"

Iruka groaned louder this time, slapping his face with an open palm. His partner, Mizuki, gave a sympathetic smile. "What did he do this time?"

One of the ANBU, a female by her voice, turned to him. "He defaced the Hokage monument by painting it. We were in pursuit when he came crashing into here." Her tone had an hint of almost affection to it. It was clear to a select few that she found the idea humorous in a way.

"Naruto!"

"What? It needed a fixer-upper! It was so dull! I made it better!"

Iruka sighed and signaled at the ANBU. "Thank you very much. I assure you that I will find a suitable punishment for him now that he's on school property."

The ANBU nodded and disappeared back out the window. Iruka turned on the boy, his face twisted into flushed anger. "What the hell were you thinking?! Tomorrow is the graduation exam and you're wasting time doing pointless pranks?! You've failed the exam twice already. You really want to repeat a third time?"

"Peh!" Naruto puffed out his cheeks and looked to the side.

His aggravation growing, Iruka pointed at the board Naruto had pinned to his side. "And what did I tell you about making those odd inventions? You should be spending your free time studying more, not creating more stupid and useless trinkets!"

"Hey, my Ukabeita is not stupid! It's a perfect amalgamation of fuuinjutsu, metallurgy, and water and wind jutsu. It's awesome and not a waste of time! You'll see! You'll see my genius!"

"What kind of genius can we see from a dead-last?"

Naruto turned around at the voice and the laughing that soon followed. He couldn't pinpoint the exact person due to the roaring laughter and mocking expressions all the other students gave, but he could guess.

That self-serving smirk, those folded fingers, that retarded duck-ass haircut. Sasuke…Another "genius," another person granted wealth and revere. Naruto couldn't begrudge the younger boy that. The boy really was a genius, in every aspect of the word. But Naruto would show him, he would show him what true genius was!

They'd see, they'd all see!

Bwahahahahahahahaha…!

Iruka watched as a maniacal light appeared in Naruto's eyes, his shoulders shaking from suppressed laughter. The boy really was such an oddity. He didn't act like a ninja, and he certainly didn't dress like one. Unlike most of the students, who were dressed in clothing that were at least somewhat suitable, Naruto was anything but.

For some reason, he adored the color orange. What kind of ninja wore orange?

What kind of ninja also wore purple, red, white, or any other not-so-natural color for that matter, but we'll ignore that for the sake of continuing the story.

Naruto was decked in an outfit that was nearly completely orange. His thick overalls and shirt were the color, his leather finger-less gloves and heavy-duty boots barely different due to their slightly browner shade. The worst of all had to be the long orange jacket he wore over everything. It draped over Naruto's shoulders, reaching down to just above his knees. It was outlined with black and had a large, swirling symbol on the back. The only thing Iruka could think of that didn't destroy the ninja image completely was the conglomeration of oil and soot stains that suffused nearly every inch of his clothes. With the dirty touch, the orange was lowered in conspicuousness from outright, "Here I am! Look!" to just above, "Errr, hi?"

Then there was the boy's fixation on machines. It wasn't just a hobby, it was an obsession. Every time he saw the boy out of class and, to his frustration, in class, Naruto was tinkering with something. And they weren't even ninja tools! Besides, he didn't believe Naruto even knew half the jargon that came spewing out of his mouth.

What kind of kid who was barely past puberty understood high-level sealing methods?

Iruka frowned. He liked the boy, but too much of anything was no good. Naruto had to learn how to focus.

"Time for a henge test!" The dejected moans and yells did not deter the chunin. "Everyone line up! You must transform into a perfect copy of me!"

As the students lined up, Naruto considered his choices. He was horrible at the academy ninjutsu but he could put to practical use the new jutsu he had created. Being a man of science, he was always looking for new data to apply to his experiments. This was as good a time as any. When his turn came, he made a hand sign, molding chakra into his technique.

What came of the jutsu was decidedly not a mirror image of Iruka. Long, flowing blonde hair, cut into ponytails, trailed down a sensuous body. Luscious curves fell over blemish-free skin. An impressive bust and a sexy backside complimented each other as they perked up for all to see. The only thing obscuring the view of the sexbomb of a blonde's nether regions were tastefully positioned clouds of chakra.

Naruko, the result of the dangerous Oiroke no Jutsu, blew a flirty kiss as she bent over at the waist, giving an impressive shot of her wickedly sinful form.

The room was silent.

Then it erupted with between shouts of unrepressed lust and torrents of blood shooting everywhere.

Naruto reverted back to his original form, glad that his goggles had prevented any blood from getting in his eyes. Really, the ingenuity of appealing the base functions of the human being was more efficient than he'd ever thought.

Naruto blinked at the sea of blood surrounding the unconscious bodies of various male academy students, two chunins, and a gobsmacked legion of girls.

He removed the goggles from his face, wiping an arm across them to clear them of blood. "I'd call that experiment a success."

Now if he could only just outrun that advancing throng of pissed-off fangirls for doing what he did to their Sasuke-kun, he'd be just fine.

He wasn't able to escape from gangs of highly trained ninjas for nothing.

Too bad they had nothing on an irate fangirl.

NTNTNTNTNT

Naruto watched as, one by one, the students left to take their final exam. Yesterday had passed by quickly, and it was already time for him to yet again attempt to gain his hitai-ate. Iruka had taken him to Ichiraku's after he had regained consciousness, giving him a small pep talk about the upcoming test. Of course, this was after he made Naruto clean up the Hokage monument. It wasn't really that hard.

He had made the paint extremely soluble for a reason.

Still, he was a bit worried about the test. Bunshin was his worst jutsu, even more so than henge and kawarimi. He just couldn't seem to form the needed chakra shape. But he did have other ways of getting around such deficiencies. Idly his fingers outlined a ball in his coat pocket. After failing so many times, he had found a way of emulating the bunshin.

Yes! He was sure to pass! And thus he was one step closer to his dream! He would become Hokage, and then…

Hearing his name called, Naruto was broken from his thoughts. He exited the communal room and entered the private one where Mizuki and Iruka were examining the students. He saw them sitting at a table, a number of headbands all neatly aligned row by row. Subtly he took the orb and dropped it down his pant leg. All it would need is a couple of words and then…

Iruka kept a frown on his face. As much as he wanted Naruto to pass, he couldn't play favorites while he was in his role as teacher. He cheered Naruto on as much as he could the day before. Now all he could hope was that Naruto would take the encouragement to heart.

"You may begin," he said in a neutral voice.

"Right!" Naruto crossed his fingers. "Bunshin no Jutsu!"

Something clicked, and the subtle whir of gears and servos came to life. The orb, hidden behind Naruto's boots, flared softly as runes crisscrossed their way across the surface, ending on a glass lens. The lens lit up, light flitting through and angling upward.

Three perfect images of Naruto flickered in existence, mirroring their original's stance. They were foggy and slightly translucent, but they were unmistakably copies of the sun-kissed blonde.

Iruka couldn't believe it. Naruto had managed to perform the jutsu!

Naruto grinned. He knew it would work! Giving a two-fingered victory sign, the clones copied in suit. "How's that for a bunshin?"

Iruka shook his head and smiled good-naturedly. "Congratulations, Naruto. You-"

A screech filled the room like nails on a chalkboard. Smoke drifted up from behind the boy. Then, in fit of scorned karma, there was an explosion, metal fragments shooting every which way. The clones shook and then flopped out, vanishing from sight.

Iruka looked on confusion, seeing how Naruto's expression became more sheepish with each silent moment. Then his face began to twist as he was riled up. "Naruto…!"

Naruto had already bent over, collecting the scraps that were once his beautiful machine. He was muttering something about the volt capacitor when he turned his face up to meet Iruka's. His expression was a mix of annoyance, fear, and resignation. "What? You never said what kind of bunshin I had to make, just that I had to make one."

"Then what the hell was that?"

"A virtual image supplanted on the air via bent light beams through an isonomic prism after refraction off a concave mirror." He blinked at the stupefied looks on the others' faces. "What? It's all basic physics and chemistry."

"Naruto…" Iruka sighed. He didn't really want to do this, but… "You fail!"

Naruto's shoulders sagged at the declaration. It was like putting the final nail on his coffin. Even with all his glorious inventions, if he had to wait another year to become a ninja, it would put a serious damper on his plans.

"Iruka…" Mizuki gave a cautious smile to his partner. He waved at Naruto. "Even if it wasn't technically a bunshin, he still managed to make clones, and three at that! Also, it's his third time here. We could let him pass."

Naruto could feel a ray of hope but it was swallowed by the clouds before it even snuck through them. Iruka rigidly shook his head at the notion. "I can't do that. The entire point of the exam was to see if he had even the most basic of chakra control. It's all but impossible to become a great ninja if you don't have that one simple attribute. The ninja world is tough, and you can't enter it with such a crucial defect." He turned to Naruto with sad, rueful eyes. "I'm sorry, Naruto, but I can't pass you."

Naruto gave one simple, sorrowful frown and turned to leave. The jingling of metal could be heard in his pockets.

Iruka watched him go, that same apologetic expression stuck on his face.

Mizuki allowed a smirk to escape.

Perfect. All according to plan.

Wasn't one of the first things a ninja learned that plans never survied upon contact with the enemy?

Mizuki was about to take very painful remedial lesson

NTNTNTNTNT

Naruto looked around. He was deep inside one of Konoha's many forests, the spot where Mizuki-sensei had told him to go after acquiring the scroll. He never would have imagined that he was allowed a make-up exam. Why hadn't Iruka-sensei said so? He could have cut out all that baloney with the chakra control and just let him do it!

However, he knew Iruka was only doing what he thought was for Naruto's own good. The aspiring genin had heard his teacher's story from Mizuki. Iruka was just like him – the class clown, dying for any form of attention. It was like looking at an older version of himself. To be honest, Naruto didn't think that would be too bad.

But then again, this did seem like a deal that had to be kept secret.

Steal a scroll from the Hokage's personal library? He had to elude ANBU and patrolling jounin at every turn! It was a lot harder than he initially thought, but being Konoha's most tricky and chaotic individual wasn't just a bunch of hot air! The only slight hitch in his stealth was coming across Sarutobi.

But that obstacle was easily passed with an application of his new henge variation. He noted that the age range didn't just apply to males near the prime of their sex life but appeared to be just as strong many years later as well. The nosebleed into a coma was proof enough of that. It was accidental data, but data that he would enter into upcoming experiments.

Data was always a good thing!

The fact that it had potential for any pranks he would go for later was just an agreeable side-effect.

Tumbling down on the ground, twigs and leaves crackling under his weight, Naruto broke the wax seal on the scroll and pulled it open. So he had to learn at least one of these jutsu before Mizuki arrived? Bah! Piece of cake for a genius! His eyes immediately narrowed at the first one that appeared.

Kage Bunshin no Jutsu.

"Well, crap."

An improvement upon the original, Kage Bunshin was obviously a much harder variation. But then, as Naruto began to read further into the semantics of the technique, his slightly closed eyes inverted and became wider instead. This…this was…!

"This is perfect!"

Rolling up his sleeves and snapping his goggles on, Naruto went to work.

Much, much later, Naruto was on his back, heaving and greedily gulping in huge quantities of air. That had been tiring! He had already figured that it had taken a massive chunk of his chakra and he was surprised that he had had so much in stock. He very much doubted anyone his age was even close to what he had just exhausted.

Heck, he was pretty damn sure most chunin didn't have what he had!

But still, the kage bunshin would be vital to increasing his workload. The limits that were put on him by his "single" body no longer existed! With the clones, his work efficiency and the quality of his inventions would make leaps and bounds. He couldn't wait until he put them to practice! And then his dream would be a fraction complete! All he needed was a little more!

His gleeful machinations were put on the backburner when Iruka landed next to him, his eyes and mouth twisted in an angry scowl. "Naruutooo! What in the world were you thinking?!"

"Hey, Iruka-sensei!" Naruto looked up at the upside-down figure of his teacher. "I was wondering if you'd find me first!"

"You idiot! Do you know what you're doing?"

"What do ya mean? I'm learning jutsu from this scroll! I mean, I've only learned one so far, but it's one hell of a doozy!"

Iruka pointed at the overly huge scroll lying by Naruto's side. "Do you have any idea what that scroll is? It's forbidden! It was sealed away for a reason! What possible excuse could you have for stealing such a valuable and dangerous item?"

Naruto pulled himself up into a sitting position, dragging the scroll across his lap. "Huh? What are you talking about? This is my make-up exam, isn't it? You know, the one that, if I pass, I can graduate?" His head was tilted, his face scrunched up in bewilderment.

Iruka paused. There was sincerity in Naruto's voice. He hadn't just taken the scroll on some flighty whim. He had taken it because he honestly believed if he did, he would be able to become a genin. But who would give him such a false idea? "Naruto? Who told you that?"

The boy stood up, clutching the scroll to his chest. "Mizuki-sensei did. He told me to get the scroll, come here, and learn at least one jutsu from it. Then he would pass me." His face faltered. "You mean that was just a joke?"

"Mizuki did…?" Iruka's ears twitched. "Naruto! Get down!"

He shoved the young boy to the side, the whistle of kunai becoming more pronounced as they slammed into his body. Naruto fell to the ground, his already worn clothes getting additional dirt ground into them. Iruka was pushed backwards into the small hut near the clearing, nearly pinned to the wall by the onslaught of pointed weaponry. Although he was pierced in multiple areas, his thick clothing and chunin jacket prevented any of them from being anywhere near fatal.

A low whistle echoed, but this one wasn't from a kunai. Mizuki landed on a branch above the clearing, strapped to the hilt with oversized shuriken and other throwing weapons. He grinned when he saw the scene. "Not bad, not bad. I aimed for the kid but got a bigger catch instead."

"Mizuki!" Iruka barked. He coughed as he pulled the kunai from his body, some blood slipping from his mouth. "What are you doing?!"

"Tch. But this fish seems to be too gangly for me to eat. Looks like bigger isn't always better.' Mizuki swung his head over to Naruto. "Naruto, give me the scroll. You passed the test." His tone was soft, much softer than it should have been after nearly killing a man who was just that morning his shinobi partner.

"Wh-what the hell is going on?! Iruka-sensei?!"

"Naruto! Whatever you do, don't hand the scroll over to him!"

"Wh…why…?"

"Like I said before, that scroll contains kinjutsu that are too powerful for any one ninja to handle. That's why it was sealed away and stored in the Hokage's vault. Mizuki must have wanted it for himself, so he used you to get it. He's a traitor, Naruto!"

"A traitor…?"

"I'm not a traitor, brat. I just wanted what I deserved. Do you know what kind of power is in that scroll? More power than you could possibly imagine! And it's all mine, as soon as I pry it from you cold fingers!"

"I won't let you put one stinking hand on him, Mizuki!" Iruka stumbled forward, his legs weakening from the blood loss. If he didn't get some first aid soon, there was a high possibility he was going to be in some serious trouble.

"You? You of all people would protect him, Iruka? Ha! That's a laugh!"

Naruto gulped, his mind whirring with activity. "What do you mean?"

"Don't you get it? He's hated you! He's always hated you! Just like everyone else, you're nothing but a polluted stain on our lives!"

Naruto's eyes grew wider at this exclamation. No, that couldn't be true, could it? Iruka couldn't have possible hated him all this time. He just couldn't! He had bought Naruto ramen! How could Iruka hate him!

Mizuki sneered at the confusion that was eating its way through Naruto's irises. Just a little bit more and it would be done. "You wanna know why?"

"Mizuki, stop!"

He ignored Iruka. "Thirteen years ago, the dreaded Kyuubi no Kitsune came to our village. No one knows why but it ruthlessly attacked us, turning any in its way into little more than dust and blood. The only way to stop it was to have the Yondaime Hokage sacrifice his life."

"I know that! It's one of our most important history lessons. But what does that have to do with me?" Steadily, slowly but surely, a dark thought began to creep its way into Naruto's brain.

"Mizuki, no! What you're saying is forbidden! Mizuki!"

"You don't think he really killed it, do you?" The air froze. All was still. "A being of that much power? You really think a human could actually permanently defeat it? No, of course not! So he sealed it away…in a little…baby…boy."

The world stopped turning. "Do you get it now?! Why the villagers hate you? Why so much animosity is directed at you with no clear reason? You're the one the Hokage sealed the Kyuubi into! You're the new incarnation of the Kyuubi no Kitsune! You killed everyone, including Iruka's parents! It's always been you!"

With that, he snapped off one of the oversized shuriken on his back and gave it a stiff whirl. Iruka watched. He watched as Miuki let go. He watched as the shuriken flew towards Naruto's prone form. He watched it inch closer.

And then he acted.

Shielding the boy with his body, he waited for the inevitable pain as the shuriken entered his back. It was the least he could do for Naruto. So much pain, so much misguided hatred. It wasn't his fault; it never was. Naruto was Naruto. He wasn't the Kyuubi.

He was just Naruto.

All he could do was protect the boy with his life.

The pain never came. Instead, a dull clang ran along his back. He opened his eyes to see that Naruto had reached his arms around him. The boy's eyes were hooded, preventing Iruka from seeing what emotions were running through them. He let go of the older and larger man and walked around him, towards Mizuki.

Mizuki couldn't believe what he had just seen. First he had gone for Naruto, but that moron Iruka had blocked his shuriken with his body. It didn't really make a difference. It was just one extra person to kill.

But then the shuriken refused to even hit him. Instead, the boy had reached around Iruka, hands positioned where the shuriken was aimed to hit. And then…the gloves grew.

Metal arched out like a blooming flower, forming a circle a foot wide that reflected the shuriken from its path and into the hut behind them. It was still extracted, perched on Naruto's left hand like a buckler.

Naruto refused to raise his head. He addressed Mizuki in a deadened voice. "Is that true? Am I really the Kyuubi?"

"No, Naruto!" Iruka interrupted. "You're not the Kyuubi! It's just inside of you! The prison is not defined by his prisoner!"

"Iruka-sensei?" A mystified tone entered his voice.

"I'm so sorry, Naruto," the chunin sobbed. "I must have caused you so much pain. I was just like everyone else…I did hate you. But now…now I see you're just like I was. You're lonely and sad and just want to find a place in the world. And I didn't help you find that place. I'm sorry. Maybe if I was a better teacher, or just a better person, it wouldn't have turned out like this."

Naruto was silent. Then his shoulders began to shake. Choked noises escaped from his throat.

"Naruto…?"

"I'm the Kyuubi but not the Kyuubi. I'm the Kyuubi but not the Kyuubi. I'm the Kyuubi but not the Kyuubi. I'm…" Naruto brought a fist to his mouth before he threw his head back, his lips curled into a wild grin. He bellowed out laughter, shocking the two teachers. "So that's what this was all about? The Kyuubi?! I've got a monster, a demon, living inside of me?!"

"Naruto, it' not…"

"This is awesome!"

…what?

"I told them that they'd see my genius. I knew I was special but not this damn special! This only makes things easier for me accomplishing my dream! You'll see, I'll become Hokage! And then, I'll use that as my stepping stone and take over the world! BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA…!"

Iruka blinked. This…This was not something he was expecting. Naruto was taking the whole Kyuubi deal a little too well. And now he was saying his dream was to take over the world? Was the boy always this off-kilter?

Mizuki, however, was not taking it well at all. He was pissed as all hell. That exposition was supposed to drive the little demon over the edge, not cheer him up! Grabbing his spare shuriken, Mizuki launched it at the laughing Naruto. "What are you laughing for, brat?!"

Naruto's grin became more devious. Lashing out, he swung his right fist in a straight motion at the shuriken. Mizuki scoffed. Was the jinchuuriki suicidal?

Not at all.

"Experiment initiated! Kiton: Kae Tebukuro! Doriru Sutairu!"

The glove shifted. Metal that was once attached to the knuckles began to rise and rotate. It formed into a large screw that began to rapidly spin. The drill made contact with the shuriken, spinning and carving the weapon into pieces of scrap metal. Soon, all that was left was a mangled lump of what used to be a deadly throwing star.

Naruto pumped his fist into the air, the drill still turning. His grin became capricious, and he smirked at Mizuki with a foxy wink. "The experiment was a success!"

Iruka had no idea what to say. He had never seen something like before. Sure there were weapons that could change shape, but nothing like what Naruto's had done. And kiton? What did "metal release" mean? "Naruto…what was that?"

"Eh? Didn't I tell you?" Naruto hopped up and down on the balls of his feet. The metal shield and drill retracted back into the gloves. He pounded the fists together. "Those were my so-called 'useless trinkets.' They are the best jutsu in the world – the kinzoku jutsu!" He nodded his head in affirmation. "And with them, I'll take over this puny planet!"

"Metal techniques…?"

"Don't think this over just yet, fox!" Mizuki pulled out a few more kunai and readied them. "Just because you have a few tricks up your sleeve, doesn't mean I'm defeated!"

"Oh, I'm not done just yet, Mizuki-sensei…" He accentuated the suffix, his voice a lethal sing-song. "And they're not tricks; they're something you've never seen before. You wouldn't mind if I used your help for experimental data, would you?"

"Just try it!"

"Oh…I will." His smile became devilish, his tone oozing honey and poison. The drill and shield emerged from their lairs once again. Iruka had never seen Naruto like this before. It was like a completely different personality had emerged from the boy. But it wasn't something new, no. "If there's anything an inventor can do, it's try things."

The mask had simply fallen off.

Naruto the mad scientist had arrived.

"Dodge this!" Mizuki threw the kunai.

"Kiton: Roketto Kutsu!" Naruto tapped his heels together. Treads burst out from the bottom and revved. He shot forward with a blaze of fire emanating from the back of his boots. Using the shield on his left arm, he blocked the incoming attack and leveled the drill with his right arm.

Mizuki dodged into the air, jumping over the boy. Naruto dashed forward, right towards the shack. But instead of crashing into it, he placed a sole right before he impacted. Smoke and the smell of burnt wood rose from the contact. Naruto was thrown upward. He pushed off, twisting and slamming the back of the shield into Mizuki's head. Not able to dodge, the man tumbled to the ground as Naruto made a less than graceful arc and slammed, stomach first, into one of the overhanging branches.

Choking back the spit he nearly swallowed down the wrong pipe, Naruto dropped back down to the ground. He turned to Mizuki, who was picking himself back up. Grinning at the enraged snarl on the man's face, he stated, "That's one. I've still got a bunch more tests to run. I think one for every kunai you hit Iruka-sensei with is adequate, don't you?"

"Brat! I'm gonna kill you!"

"No, I don't think that's gonna work." Naruto put his hands together, recalling the gloves. "But if you want to try, then allow me to introduce you to my associates." He plugged his fingers together into the ram seal. "Kage Bunshin no Jutsu."

The forest exploded with orange. Hundreds upon hundreds Narutos popped out of thin air. Each one was wearing a sickening, saccharine grin on their face.

Mizuki promptly felt his bowels void themselves.

"The experiments are about to begin." One of the Naruto said.

"And each of us is going to have our own." Another exclaimed.

"It's probably more than what happened to Iruka-sensei."

"But what do we know? We're the dead-last of the academy!"

The multitude of Narutos each pulled out a singular orb from their jackets. If one looked close enough, you could see that the runes inscribed on the balls looked suspiciously similar to those written on explosive seals.

"Experiment initiated!"

The resulting explosions wiped out nearly a square mile of the forest.

NTNTNTNTNT

"Iruka-sensei? Ne, Iruka-sensei!"

"Wha-what?" Iruka clumsily woke from his impromptu nap. After watching Naruto create enough firepower that would make an explosive expert jealous, he had passed out when a stray rock had conked him on the side of the head. Looking around, he shot to his feet but then instantly fell back down when he became dizzy. "Where's Mizuki?"

Naruto jerked a thumb over his shoulder at the burnt, smoking, but still breathing body of Mizuki as he lied unconscious by a tree. "I might have gone a little hard on him, but he'll survive."

Iruka breathed a sigh of relief. As much as he was glad that Mizuki was defeated, he didn't want Naruto to become a killer already. But, he had more important matters to attend to. "Naruto, where did you learn all those skills?"

Naruto tilted his head. He pursed his lips. "Eight years."

"Huh?"

"I've been learning, testing, and making those jutsu for eight years, ever since I found this book that described them."

"What are kinzoku jutsu?"

The boy grinned. "Metallurgy infused with seals that provide a numerous amount of abilities, services, and effects depending on how they're created."

"Would you mind showing some to me?"

Naruto tapped the side of his head. "Sorry, Iruka-sensei. Trade secret. Can't let you know all my skills for taking over the world."

Iruka remained silent for a second. "Naruto, do you really mean that?"

"Mean what?"

"Taking over the world?"

"Of course," he replied as though it was the most obvious answer. "I'm gonna become Hokage and then conquer the rest of the continent and then whatever lies beyond. I'll show everyone just what a genius I am, that I don't have to learn their ways just to be great! I'll create my own jutsu, and become better than anyone, even ji-ji!"

"Is that so…?" Iruka looked at Naruto. "Close your eyes." The boy looked at him strangely. "Go on, do it."

Naruto closed his eyes. He could feel Iruka try to remove his goggles, but he grabbed his hand and gave a small squeeze. Iruka paused before smiling and then wrapping something around his left arm. "Okay, you can open them now."

Naruto looked down. There, on his bicep, was a Konoha headband, the steel plate sparkling through the few remnants of dirt. He looked at Iruka with unbelieving eyes. The chunin smiled. "Congratulations, graduate."

The newly-appointed genin gaped before he closed his mouth. Closing his eyes again, he twisted his mouth into a smile.

"The experiment…was a success."

A/N: Whoo!! New story up! This one involves a new type of Naruto – a world conquering one! All bow down before Naruto the mechanical genius! I really enjoyed writing this, and it was rather fun to create as well. I wanted to create a whole new "brand" of jutsu, and I did so through the kinzoku! Yay! Naruto's the ultimate wrench boy!

Expect more chapters later. Naruto will be getting crazier with each chapter, so look forward to that as well. BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!! As for pairings, I've initially decided this will be a Naruto/Tenten pairing. Why? Boy who loves machines, girl who loves weapons. It's the perfect couple! Perhaps there will be lesser relationships, but Na/Ten will be the main one.

Send any ideas for metal jutsu, preferably by PM. I'll take them into consideration. See ya!

Please Review, and remember, no flames!

Next Preview: Time to Take Over the World!

New Jutsu

Kae Tebukuro (Morph Gauntlets): A pair of gloves that can morph when activated. Their original forms are iron tipped gauntlets for bashing in close combat. The right glove can morph into a revolving drill, and the left glove can morph into a small shield a foot or so in diameter.

Roketto Kutsu (Rocket Boots): A pair of boots that can extend and retract caterpillar treads from the bottom, turning them into skates. Mini-boosters on the back end let out boosts of speed via highly pressurized fire-chakra, acting like nitro boosters. They allow Naruto to climb up vertical surfaces and travel upside down without having to use chakra to stick because the treads dig into the surface and drag him along.