as you can see, i have been very

busyfirst i wrote all these stories in a notebook, then i typed them. we didn't

have school last friday, or this monday, or today, tuesday, so i was VERY bored.

DISCLAIMER: I DON'T OWN TWILIGHT. although i wish i did

It has been about 5 months sense Edward left me, sense then, I've died more times than death has caused itself. The hurt and pain of losing the only person you love more than you love your own life burns a hole into your heart, one that can only be filled by your lover. I would gladly take on the challenge of death, if it meant leaving this pain and hurt.

Out of the experience, I've only learned one thing; love hurts.

When he told me that he didn't love me anymore, I tried so hard to tell myself he was just lying, leaving me for me, but it never made sense for him to love me, none at all. Why would he love me? I'm a simple plan Jane, nothing special to look at. It was just a flicker of luck, but one wrong breath, the flicker would die. And that's exactly what had happened. And when he left, the flicker died, just like me, sending me into a time of pain, hurt, and denial.

Physically, I've almost died twice. I was being stupid and reckless, driving a motorcycle without any experience. Reckless. Yesterday, I jumped off a cliff. Stupid. I didn't wait for Jacob, I just jumped. I don't know how, but Jacob jumped in and swam me back to shore. After I got all the salt water out of my system, Jacob brought me back to his house, he made me some –not so great tasting- soup.

I just came back from Jake's house. He has been tuning up this really old car, he calls it a rabbit. I don't know why. Jake stiffened, his eyes narrowing. "There's a bloodsucker in there," he said, he had his hand on my shoulder, trying to get my attention. But all my attention was on the black Mercedes in the driveway. I knew it, the dark tinted windows, the certain shine, it belonged to Carlisle Cullen. I shook off his hand, running to the front door. "Bella! What do you think you're doing!" Jake yelled.

"Jake! Let go of me! Its one of the Cullens!!" Jake grabbed both of my shoulders, shaking me, trying to knock some sense into me. "Jake, trust me! You can kill whatever vampire," I stressed the word, so maybe he will start using it more than… bloodsucker. "That's in there. As long as it's not one of the Cullens. Okay? Please!!" I begged. "Please Jake, I have to see. I have to." I whispered.

He sighed and removed his hands from my shoulders. "Fine! On one condition though." I nodded my head, just wanting to go in already. "I go in first, 'kay?" I nodded quickly again, I wanted to see my old family again! Gosh, I missed them so much!

Jacob twisted the handle and pushed the door open. All the lights were off setting an eerie atmosphere. Suddenly, I suddenly wasn't so confident that it was one of the Cullens.

A dark figure came into view, a tall, lean, muscular silhouette. It kind of reminded me of Jasper. Jake crouched into a defensive stance, starting to shake, a growl coming from his chest. The figure stooped into a fighting stance, a loud growl coming from his chest as well. A flashback of my birthday flooded my memory, the gift, the paper cut, Edward, Jasper. The same growl coming from his thin, white lips, immediately I stood up from my crouch behind Jacob, "Jasper?" I whispered. The figure stood up from his defensive crouch and just looked at me. I felt my way along the wall, my fingers searching for the light switch, once I found it, I flicked on the lights, and there stood, in fact, Jasper Hale.

A huge smile danced across my face as I ran and jumped into him, embracing him into the tightest hug I could manage. He wrapped his arms around me hugging me back. "I missed all you guys." I whispered into his ear, a tear escaping my eye. Then I realized I must be making this hard for him, me being so close to him, I pulled away immediately. "I'm sorry." I whispered. He just chuckled and pulled me into another hug. "I missed you to Bella." He said, still a trace of laughter in his musical voice.

"Um, I'm… just gonna… I'm gonna go. See ya around, Bella." I heard Jake say, obviously feeling awkward. Jasper was holding in a laugh, as was I.

"So, um, where is everybody else?" I asked, looking over his shoulder, trying to find out where the rest of the family was. I didn't see Rosalie, Esme, Carlisle, Emmet, or even Alice.

"They couldn't make it. It's just me." He said, "Rosalie and Emmet are on another honey moon, Carlisle couldn't leave the hospital, um… Edward…" he looked down at me, to see my reaction to his name. I have to admit, I felt a sting, like four hundred wasps stinging you at the same time, but for me, that was a relief.

"G… go on, I… I'm" I gulped, "I'm fine." I managed.

"Edward is somewhere in south America, and," he looked down to me again, he seemed extremely hesitant. "Alice went to go find him, four months ago. She, she found him alright, she just… she decided not to came back."

"Esme?" I asked, dazed. So Edward went to South America, Alice went to go find him, she found him, but she never came back. So what? Are they officially together now? Why would she do that to me? Why would she do that to Jasper? It doesn't sound very Alice-y.

"… with Carlisle." He looked at me, "you weren't listening, were you?" he asked, even though I couldn't bring myself to look at him, I could tell he was smiling. How could he be so happy? His wife just went running off with his brother! And he's not,


"Are they… you know, together now? I asked him, fearing the much anticipated answer.

The atmosphere became miserable and hurt; it just hung there, getting into everybody's way. You couldn't see anything but the misery and hurt in Jasper, how could I have thought that he was so happy? He looked like –if he could- he would be crying. "I'm so sorry Jasper," I whispered, hugging him, resting my head on his shoulder.

Mashed into that one hug, I could feel all his pain, hurt, and misery. It rolled off him like they were waves rolling onto the shore. That's when I realized how much he actually cared for her, how much he actually loved her, and how much she broke him.

Anger surged through me, but not at Alice, at Jasper. "So, is that why you came? To tell me the big news? Huh, to break my heart more than it already is?" I asked, getting angrier with every passing second. I pushed him away from me, my emotions getting the better of me.

"What? No! Why would I do that to you! I love you like you were my own sister. Why would I come just to hurt you?" he asked, pulling me back against him. "I came to ask you for your help." He wrapped his arms around me again, embracing me into a tight hug.

"Jasper!... cant… breath… human… here!" I gasped. He pulled away immediately, muttering a string of apologies. "So, what do you need help with?" I asked him, I felt a lot better now that Jasper was here, and not because of his gift. "Jasper, I'm so sorry for blaming you, I should have known that you wouldn't come here just to hurt me. Can you please forgive me?" I .said, smiling. "Why don't we come and sit in here." I said, walking into the TV room. "so what can I do for you today?" I asked again, turning to look at him. He was sitting next to me on the love seat, he looked sort of uncomfortable.

"well, I just thought that you could… help me with… um… the, um issue." He stammered, very uncomfortable. "I thought that you… would be… the …best one… to ask for… help sense… this… involves you to." He looked at me, hope dancing over his beautiful features, he didn't want to suffer anymore, and neither did i.

"Jasper, I would… love to help you." I said, a warm smile forming on my lips. " I guess, we… are… both… involved in this… this… this issue." I found it just as hard to talk about as him, the stinging feeling coming back into my chest.

"um, but Jasper, where are you going to live? I mean, if we had any more space…" I said, not knowing what was coming out of my mouth until it spilled out. I bushed deeply, I let a shield of hair fall in front of my face, so he wouldn't see how embarrassed I was, although I forgot about his special power. Jasper just laughed, he pushed the fallen hair back behind my ear, which made me blush even more.

Suddenly Jasper whipped his head around, standing up before I could even think about blinking. "Charlie will be upset if he sees me here, I'll be staying in the white house in the meadow if you need me. You ca come over tomorrow if you want, I think I'm going to go hunting tonight, though I'll be back before midnight. I gotta get going, I'll see you tomorrow, I got school to go to." He flashed a smile, and gave me another hug, "it was really nice seeing you again, Bella. I'll see you tomorrow." He was out the slider door within seconds, blending into the shadows of the night.

No sooner than he left Charlie walked into the door, "what are you staring at out there, Bells?" he asked.

"Oh, nothing. Um, I forgot to start diner. We can just order pizza if you want."

" hey, are you okay? You seem different. Well, you look kind of happy. What happened today?" great, today of all days he picks to be a parent.

"I don't know dad, I just, I feel good today! I am really happy." I said, with a smile on my face. I could tell that he wasn't going to let it go. I've been sulking for five months straight, then all of a sudden I become happy. Yea, he's not going to let it go.



~ Brittany aka darklover101