Summary: A gentle and pure person, an angel who offered her the love she had never felt before. And also, the only friend she had. MadlaxVanessa.
An angel's light
By: Kida Luna
One – Shot
Her eyes were fixed on her, awaiting that the pronounced words weren't more than just a lie. But the person in front of her didn't falter, even though the fear inside her eyes or the shaking of her hands, she remained steady.
"Teach me," she repeated, "teach me how to handle a gun, Madlax."
Why? Why did she want to stain her hands with something like that? She wasn't an agent like her, she was a person with a lot of skills and good feelings, unable to hurt any other living being.
Otherwise like her, there were so many things she was able to do. Because Madlax only knew how to kill, how to kill and cook pasta, but one cannot live forever from just pasta. She was a killer.
The best of all.
"Are you sure?"
The pale pupils watched her warily, she didn't understand. She closed her eyes with a downcast head; smiling, smiling in a saddening way. She didn't want to taint her.
She did not want to spoil her precious essence.
Not Vanessa Renee's essence.
A weak whisper, the gaze looking at the ground. Was it shame, perhaps? But why? Why someone as pure as her would desire to tear her soul with the most fearsome sins?
She didn't want that. Madlax did not want her to become a killer, just like her.
"I want to protect my friends..." Her voice mumbled in a very low tone, never averting the eyes from the blonde, "... please..." She asked.
She could feel Vanessa's hand touching hers with tenderness while the other one cupped up her cheek; the love and concern reflected on the green irises, wrapping up the agent completely.
But Madlax didn't face her. It was too much kindness. Too much gentleness looking for a person who had dedicated her whole live to steal others.
Vanessa smiled a little, brushing off the gold strands on Madlax's face, and then she kissed her forehead with care. The blonde looked at her, in pain.
"You're a good person, Madlax." She said. "I can tell you that."
And soon, she found herself trapped in an embrace. Madlax closed her eyes and let herself being comforted; she didn't know how Vanessa could do it, but she always made her feel as if everything was fine.
As if she really was a seventeen years old child. Desesperated for love and understanding.
So she accepted, that night Madlax accepted to teach her how to handle a gun. That night, as the few ones, she slept with Vanessa; over that old and uncomfortable couch where she could hear her voice lulling her little by little.
Vanessa was... an angel, she thought...
" – " – "
It was a sob, she had never regretted so much in her life. How stupid she had been!
No. She wasn't going to come back. She wasn't because someone as good as Vanessa Renee had died by her fault. Putting her life in danger by a murderess.
And that, that was what hurt the most.
She deserved to die, she was the one who killed million of people, she was the guilty one, the sinner, only her! Then... why?
The feeling hovering upon her heart was totally dreadful, the lone image of her friend resting on the soil, bleeding out because of the blame of a bullet which had written her name in itself.
She was dead.
Her only friend, was dead.
"Why? You said you'd never die!"
More tears fell down, herself felt betrayed. Why Vanessa had to come into her life, giving her a lot of beatiful things and then just run away from her side? That was mean.
Madlax was very attached to her.
She made the worst thing a person like her could do. Hold onto someone, when she had never done this in her entire life.
She could stand any other thing, but losing Vanessa, it was losing the only real thing she had in this world. Because she hasn't anything right now. Everything was returning back as it was before.
The war, the bullets, the violence, the death.
Where the fond smiles? Or the nice hugs? And what about the marvellous words Vanessa dedicated to her everyday?
Where the feeling of being an innocent child was, even though it was a lie, where it was?
She desired never taught her how to fire a gun and never tainted her soul with her own sins. But there was no turn back, not anymore. Madlax was born from the sin and she will always live inside itself, she hadn't a place where to run no more.
The only shelter she cherished was gone, snatched from her life.
One more tear fell while she head off to the balcony of her department, beholding the black night without stars. She leaned in the railing and rested her head between her arms.
Yes. Vanessa was a very selfish person for letting her behind, alone. To Madlax not having company never was a big deal, but the black-haired one made her way into her life to bring her a few of the hapiness she had never known before.
Every simple gesture, every touch of her hands was impregnated of an indistinguishable and wonderful sweetness that aroused in the agent the strong feeling to remain at her side.
And now, all that had vanished. By her fault.
She smiled bitterly and went back inside her lair, switching off the lights and drawing the blinds. One last tear shone in the darkness. Vanessa Renee would never return back there.
Her gentle and green eyes, had faded forever, remaining hidden in the rest of her haunted memories.
The only friend she had, was gone.
Madlax lay down on the old and green couch, watching at the nothingness; asking herself that, if she were here, would Vanessa dare to hug her one more time and say that she was still there?
She denied foolishly and laughed from herself. The blonde closed her eyes and cried in silence, allowing the weariness in her body to drift her away.
After all, she wasn't a good person, was she?
"Liar..." She scarcely whispered.
If she had been really good, she would have been able enough to save her, to protect her. But she wasn't. Vanessa Renee was an angel, a white and beautiful angel.
And unconsciously, she had made the blonde to learn to love her more and more every passing day. And thus that, the agent would never forget her.
Because very deep inside, in her heart, Madlax loved her.
She loved everything about her, because it was exactly what Vanessa taught her. And despite it was very painful at the end, Madlax was deeply grateful to have the chance to touch her purity and to have felt the warmth of her light.
Vanessa Renee's light. An angel's light...
A short story about Vanessa, I really had the feeling to write something about her.
By the way, this isn't beta-ed, I just wanted to post it right now so I apologize if there are mistakes. Again, if you could point out some errors you may seen, I would be very grateful :)
I hope you'd enjoyed, critiques and comments are welcome. Ado, I appreciate a lot the given attention.
Have nice celebrations!