Hi! Just to let you know that this story has been nominated for Best Cullen Representation at the TwiTastic Awards! Thank you very much for considering my story good enough… and please vote! You can see the link in my profile.
Yeah, I know… it took so long! But hey, I promised to write Rose and Edward's 'mental' conversation, so… here it is! ;)
"Bonus chapter: Image of beauty"
I… I don't want to be alone… I want to stay" Rosalie said, once Carlisle gave her the choice.
"Of course, honey. You can stay with us" Esme said. Mi father nodded, agreeing, but I wasn't paying attention… she was thinking about her 'incident', and I was seeing it with her: the man abusing her, the beating, the blood, her pain… it was too much for me; it reminded me of my darker years, when I hunted human blood.
"Edward?" Carlisle asked, evidently worried. I jumped a little when he said his name; I hadn't even realized my hands were pressed into fist now. I tried to block her mind.
"No… nothing, Carlisle" I said, distracted, and looked at Rosalie with outrage and fury… for a moment, I though about going out there to chase this 'man' –if I could call him a man- Such a cruel creature shouldn't be called a man… I felt furious just seeing the suffering he'd caused Rosalie with a smile on his face. I jumped again when I felt my father place a hand on my shoulder. He'd guessed what I was seeing.
"Stop it, Edward… it must be too painful to watch" he advised me. I nodded. Rosalie looked at Carlisle, confused.
"What is happening? Why are you looking at me like that?" Rosalie asked, and looked into a small mirror near the couch. 'Well, I'm still pretty…' She thought, smiling. That took me by surprise… after all this, all she cared about was that she was beautiful? She then looked at me with a curious expression. 'What? Do you like me? What are you seeing?' she thought. I didn't like her mind: so… shallow.
"Nothing" I said with a cold tone. Rosalie looked at me with petulance, as if she was a queen and I merely a commoner.
"Please don't be angry, Rosalie. Edward can 'hear' what others think… he was seeing your thoughts" Carlisle said. Big mistake. Rosalie got furious at that.
'He´s doing WHAT?' "YOU were seeing what I was thinking? Without my consent?" she asked, angry. 'My mind is none of your business… stop it, now!' she thought. She used a disgusted tone, which only increased my anger… but I sighed, trying to remain calm. I knew my gift was something difficult to explain, or to get used to… her reaction was, after all, normal.
"I couldn't help it. Your thoughts were so… intense to ignore. I'm sorry" I said, but Rosalie ignored my apologies.
"You should control it… its really uncomfortable" she said, looking elsewhere. 'That's so rude… I can't believe this boy!' I wished I could block her mind now; no matter how outraged I felt by her words, I knew they were true… it was rude, after all, but her thoughts were so intense I couldn't block them properly. I looked at her, furious at the way she was treating me.
"It's not that easy… you can't know how hard it is to block the voices" I said with low voice. Mi father looked at me, raising an eyebrow… he knew me well; that tone only meant I was loosing my temper. I looked at her intently, trying to discover why she was so angry at me when we barely knew each other.
'God! Why is he staring at me like that? Like I'm a… common girl… he's so handsome… why must he be prettier than I am?' she thought. That was it? She was angry because I was more beautiful than she? I couldn't avoid an amused expression… the reasons behind her attitude were plainly ridiculous. Rosalie noticed it, and moved slightly, uncomfortable.
'But why is he looking at me like that? it seems he's not interested in me… how could this be? I'm beautiful… why doesn't he adores me? Maybe he doesn't like women?' She thought, frowning, and the anger in her face increased… I raised an eyebrow, amused. She thought I was weird because I didn't love her already; this girl was so accustomed at people wanting her that she found my indifference offensive. Yes, definitively shallow.
"Please, calm down… if we are going to live together, it will be best if we learn to like each other" Carlisle said, trying to make peace, but at this point we were so angry to each other that didn't listen to his wise words.
'Why? Why must he be more beautiful? His face… so handsome… I can't stand it!' Rosalie thought.
"I can't believe that makes you jealous" I said. It was time to make her understand that attitude was unnecessary. Rosalie gasped, outraged.
'How can you…? Stop it! It's annoying! I hate you! Aren't you a little bit interested in me?' she thought, angry. Well, at this point, I hated her shallow attitude too.
"Honestly, I don't care" I said, answering to Rosalie's mental screams.
"Well, I do… happy?" she said angrily. I sighed; well, at least she'd admitted she wanted me to adore her… but I wasn't interested. She was not the kind of woman I could be interested in.
'Are you BLIND? Don't you see I'm beautiful? You should be ashamed of treating me like this!' She thought. It only increased my anger: she was the one insulting me, and I needed to apologize?
"Why should I be? I don't care what you think…" I said, but stopped abruptly when her thoughts screamed again.
'You mean… you don't think about it? Each time you see your face in a mirror… you don't care?' she asked, as if she couldn't believe it. But no, I didn't care if I was handsome or not; my idea was that the one I loved would see more than just my face, so I never gave it any importance.
"No, I don't…" I said, trying to be kinder. The tone in her voice had sounded so sorrowful, as if she'd failed at something; I guess she felt disappointed at her failed attempt seducing me. After all, this was surely difficult for her. Rosalie looked sad.
'At least… promise you won't tell anyone about this… please' she begged. It was not necessary, though; I never shared other's thoughts unless I had permission to do so.
"I promise" I said sincerely, and Rosalie relaxed a little.
"That's better… you shouldn't be arguing, you're brothers now" Esme said cheerfully. I thought about the idea, but Carlisle's mind interrupted me.
'Maybe even more than…I mean, Esme looks beautiful like that…' How funny. He was thinking about my mother, but I caught a glimpse at something different. It was obvious he was hiding something from me. I looked at Carlisle, and he focused on Esme again… whatever he was hiding, he was doing a great effort not to show it again, so I focused on our new member again. Rosalie looked at them, and smiled… until she looked at me.
'Still not interested, Edward?' she thought, smiling at me with a seductive expression. Yes, she was beautiful, but that was not exactly my first priority in a woman. She needed more than just her face to attract me.
The worst was that I knew she didn't even want me to love her. She was trying simply because I was the first one who didn't desire her; it frustrated her, so she was trying to prove me –or herself- that she could seduce me. I stood up, ignoring her, unable to hide my amused smile. Rosalie sighed, frustrated.
'Don't you feel attracted to me?' she thought –again-. As if she couldn't believe it. I guess she wasn't used to be ignored. Her mind was getting boring to me…
"No… I'm not" I answered plainly. She had to stop this little game, it was useless. Esme and Carlisle seemed confused, but Rosalie looked at me with plain hate.
'I hate you…you're supposed to find me beautiful, everyone does. Am I not good enough for you, mister? Am I not the girl of your dreams?' she asked with arrogance. I realized she thought I considered her 'unworthy'… so silly.
"You're not… is that so bad for you?" I added. I didn't mean to be so rude, but her mind was annoying me. She crossed her arms.
'I'm sure any man around here would give anything to be with someone as beautiful as me…' She added, still arrogant. Well, maybe so, but I was not like any other men… I searched for true love, not a face.
"I guess so…" I said, annoyed.
'I look beautiful for everyone' she added, more to herself than to me, as if she'd lost her main virtue.
"But not to me" I said, making my point clear. I didn't want her trying to seduce me all my existence just to satisfy her ego. Without looking at her again, I moved towards the piano to play.
Lol this was hard… I think I made Rosalie too, huh, bad? But I guessed her thoughts would be like that… after all, she has confessed she felt outraged by Edward's indifference (and the fact he's prettier than she… silly vampire lol).
I hope it doesn't sound so bad… sorry for any typos, again no one checked this before I published it.