Disclaimer: I do not own Code Geass.

Please check out my AMVs and 'Family Geass/Geass Guy' videos on Youtube, too! My name there is "Hikasu3445".

Expect some more crack fics on the way, possibly! POSSIBLY!!!

I can make fun of this damn show forever...although I don't want to do it forever...


Geass For All:

Lelouch had a thought. 'What if everyone had a Geass of their own?'

Turning to C.C., he ordered, "C.C., MY PERPETUALLY BEAUTIFUL LITTLE FLOWER, GO AND TOUCH EVERYONE WHO'S MEANINGFUL AND GIVE THEM GEASS...including Rivalz this time, okay?!"

C.C. nodded. "YES, SIR!!!"

Suddenly, Kallen walked by. Running over to her, C.C. reached down and placed her hand on Kallen's crotch. "Ooh...it's warm..."

An awkward silence filled the air.

"Yeah...do it like that..." Lelouch said with a straight face.

Suddenly, the Geass symbol formed in Kallen's right eye, and she fired a laser beam that set C.C. ablaze.


The Difference Between A Noogie And An Ass Punch:

"PEOPLE OF BRITANNIA, PLEASE REMEMBER, IN THIS TIME OF CRISIS, ONE VERY IMPORTANT FACT: A NOOGIE IS A NOOGIE NO MATTER WHERE IT IS APPLIED ON THE BODY!!!" Charles zi Britannia exclaimed to the crowd, who in response burst out into applause.

V.V., who was standing beside his brother, coughed into his fist and muttered, "You know, a noogie to the butt is more of an ASS PUNCH than anything else..."

Charles glared at him. "Shut...the fuck...up..."

"Hey, I'm just tryin' to help make your speeches actually be SENSIBLE, but you always put me down!! You're cruel, bro!!" V.V. exclaimed, and he ran off in tears.

The crowd was silent.

"Anyway..."


Cornelia's Hygiene:

Lelouch and Suzaku only meant to sneak into the showers while Cornelia was taking a bath so they could take snapshots of her in all her naked glory. However, what they DID find both horrified and disturbed them.

"HOLY CRAP!!!" Lelouch whispered rather loudly as they watched from behind the corner, "SHE'S...SHE'S SHAVING HER ARMPITS!!! UHH...THAT'S ALOT OF PURPLE HAIR!!"

A smirk formed on Suzaku's lips. "Oh man, what I wouldn't give to shove my face in there, and take a nice big whiff...ahh..."

"...Fuck you, Suzaku,"


ELITE GEASS AGENTS (EGA):

Rivalz just couldn't do it. He couldn't beat his video game. He needed motivation, he needed willpower, he needed...

"HEEEEEEEEEEEEEAALP!!!!"

Suddenly, three figures crashed down through the ceiling, and landed in front of him...it was Lelouch, Suzaku and Rolo, and they were all dressed in black suits and sunglasses.

"WE ARE...THE ELITE GEASS AGENTS!!!" Lelouch proclaimed.

Rivalz was silent for a moment. "...Where are the cheerleaders?"

"You mean Kallen, C.C. and Euphemia? You have to unlock them first, dipwad!!"

"And what about the chief? You know, your boss and the guy who dances with the cheerleaders in the hardest difficulty...?"

"Oh, that's Charles zi Britannia..."

Rivalz was silent again. "...Just start dancing..."

"ALRIGHT! READY? 3, 2, 1! GOOOO!!!"


Nunnally, Master of The Skies:

The large army of Knightmare Frame Gurrens were about to descend upon the kingdom of Britannia, when one of the soldiers caught sight of something on his radar.

"...What the hell?"

Suddenly, something crashed right through the bottom half of his mecha, and it exploded to pieces.

Several other Knightmare Frames nearby caught this, and immediately grew nervous.

"WE'RE...WE'RE UNDER ATTACK ALREADY?! BUT BY WHAT?!"

Within moments, the same mysterious object tore through several more Knightmare Frames with ease, blowing them all without any trouble.

Looking closely, the object was revealed to actually be Nunnally Lamperouge, who had recently had her wheelchair upgraded with a jet-boosters.

Laughing insanely, she exclaimed, "THE SKIES BELONG TO NUNNALLY!!!"

'OH GOD, WE'RE ALL GONNA DIE...!!!!!'


One Geass:

"I'M GONNA BE KING OF THE BRITANNIANS!!!"

Wearing a pink top hat with antlers, Rolo grimaced. 'Why the hell do I have to be Chopper...?'

"Hey, we're all freaks here...don't worry..." Suzaku spoke up, polishing his three swords out of boredom.

Kallen - Nami, C.C. - Robin, Jeremiah - Franky, Rivalz - Usopp, Gino - Sanji, etc.


YOU GOT LULU'ROLLED:

Charles zi Britannia was reading a porn magazine when his son, Lelouch, suddenly walked into the throne room.

Tossing the book over his shoulder, Charles snapped, "Lelouch, what the hell are you doing here? I thought I banned you...or something like that..."

Lelouch just smirked. Reaching into his pocket, he began to pull out something. Charles thought it was a gun for a moment, but it turned out...to be a microphone.

Suddenly, music began to play in the background, and about 500 people, including C.C., Kallen, Suzaku and some others, marched into the room, all of them under the control of Lelouch's Geass. They began dancing to the music in unison as Lelouch swayed from side to side.

Holding the microphone near his lips, Lelouch began to sing:

"NEVER GONNA GIVE YOU UP, NEVER GONNA LET YOU DOWN! NEVER GONNA RUN AROUND, AND DESERT YOU! NEVER GONNA MAKE YOU CRY, NEVER GONNA SAY GOODBYE! NEVER GONNA TELL A LIE, AND HURT YOU!!! WE'VE KNOWN EACH OTHER...FOR SO LONG-"

"I'VE BEEN LULUROLLED!!!" Charles gasped.