Last chapter. Still funny. Lots of Stars Hollow. Please review. Merry Christmas from CV.



Sookie was bustling around the kitchen, checking on everything from the paté to the giant pot of the magic rissoto, when the doorbell rang.

"Who is it?" she shouted, giving the brunch setting one last adjustment.

"Candygram! Landshark!"

An answer like that could only mean one person. Sookie dropped everything and opened the door. "Come in, you guys! Merry Christmas!"

"Merry Christmas," Luke, Rory and Lorelai all replied, stepping into the house. "Wow," Lorelai added, "it smells seriously good in here. It's not my last meal, is it?"

"Not that I know of," Sookie laughed. "And if it is, then there should definitely be taquitos."

"Exactly---I cannot die without a ginormous plate of taquitos. And you can quote me on that." Lorelai then produced the gift-wrapped box she'd been holding. She'd wrapped it last night, so neither Luke nor Rory knew the contents. "We got you something!"

"Oh, you guys didn't have to do that!" Sookie sat down on the sofa anyway and peeled at the wrapping paper.

When she opened the box, she lifted out a giant ceramic weasel.

"Wow. You guys really didn't have to do that."

Luke and Rory both shot Lorelai a you-can't-be-serious look. Lorelai responded by ignoring them, smiling, and elbowing then both in a not-a-word kind of way. "You like it? You can use it as as, you know, like a paperweight or something."

Sookie put the rat back in the box. "Aw, I love it. It's great, guys, thanks." The wail of a little girl rose up in the background. "Oh, that's Martha. I should check on her."

She hurried off to tend to her crying toddler, and Lorelai gave the other two a smug look.

"That was cruel," Luke said. "Why would you force that piece of crap on somebody you like?" He was trying not to laugh, just a little bit. "That's the kind of thing you treasure for the rest of your life. Put it on the mantle. Shine a spotlight on it. Introduce it to people as your other child."

"I hope you're satisfied with yourself," Rory added.

Lorelai just smiled.




Once the feast was cleared up and the guests had moved on, Sookie and Jackson grabbed the kids, bundled up, and did their own holiday visiting.

"I don't see why we had to get something for everybody," Jackson complained. "We don't even talk to most of these people except at town meetings. Gypsy's strobe light alone was thirty-five bucks. I'm sorry---who even needs a strobe light?"

"It's fun," Sookie defended, "and it would be rude not to. Now come on," she said, approaching a door. The re-wrapped weasel figurine was under one arm. "Andrew's first."




Later that morning, since the bookstore was closed for Christmas day, Andrew was enjoying a leisurely walk through the town square. He held a small stack of presents, and went along to Miss Patty's to deliver the first one---some kind of rodent in a new coat of wrapping paper.




"Oh, Taylor! Taylor, honey, my goodness, wait up!"

Taylor stopped halfway down the road and waited patiently as Patty made her way up to him, trailing a vintage Radio-Flyer wagon full of gifts behind her.

She plucked a gift bag from the top of the pile, with a white cardboard box inside, and handed it over. "Merry Christmas!"

She rushed away before he could say anything more than "Thank you, Patty." Curiously, he lifted the box out and pried the lid off.

It looked like...a yard figurine. Like a weasel or a ferret or something.

Taylor sighed. It would have been the perfect gift, but he already had an even number of them by the azaleas. What on earth am I going to do with this?




The morning of December 26th, Luke was wiping down the counter when the bell on the door jingled, and a new customer breezed into the diner.

Luke looked up. "Hey, Kirk. What can I get ya?"

"Toast, dry. Cut it into crescent moons this time?"

Luke was confused, but hey, then again, it was Kirk. "Sure. What the hell." He went about setting the toaster and putting on a fresh pot of coffee.

Kirk insisted on initiating a conversation, as he usually did. "Man, I had the greatest Christmas yesterday," he began, taking a seat at the counter. "Mother got me those new Star Wars sheets like I wanted, and Taylor got me---well, check it out!"

Luke watched in a combination of horror and great amusement as Kirk reached under his seat and plunked a footlong ceramic weasel on the counter.

"Isn't it awesome?" He was so enthusiastic, it was almost sad.

Luke smiled, especially since Kirk had no idea why. "Oh yeah. I'm in awe, all right."