Authors note; Aw, I thought I would post something new for Christmas :) And my birthday is tomorrow! Whoo! This has taken a bit longer than some of my other one shots, but it took a lot of thinking power, and it is also a lot longer. Just what I thought how the first vampire came about.
Disclaiming: I don't own twilight. Twilight, on the other hand, does own me.
I didn't know what year it was, what time it was, my name, family; nothing. All I could think was how hungry I was. How thirsty I was. What I would do for something, anything to get me on my feet again. All I knew was that I was dying, and that I couldn't. Not yet. I couldn't die.
I guess it was lucky I was young. It may have brought me some time; being young and strong. I would walk around the streets at night, my mouth watering at the smell of rotten potatoes and live cattle. It hadn't rained for months. I had no where to go, and I was so tired. So constantly tired, but I couldn't sleep. I may have missed rainfall if I slept. I was so thirsty.
My teeth became rotten. I used wood to chew on to keep them less sharp and to keep myself from drawing blood in my own mouth. I didn't go out during the day and in the sunlight; my skin was so sensitive from the lack of nutrition. It seemed to sizzle in the sun, burning. No one even knew I was alive.
I must have walked for days. I didn't know; I had lost count. I ran at first, excited about the prospect of finding someone kind enough to feed me, someone with enough love in their heart to give me some water. I must have run for hundreds of yards, my feet carrying me at a nice and steady pace. I began to get tired. I hadn't eaten for days and had been running for the same amount of time, roughly. I slowed to a walk which deteriorated to a crawl over time. I took shelter under a tree in the masses of fields. When I first came across the fields I was excited, maybe one piece of land was covered with grain? No such luck. I had resorted to eating handfuls of grass, testing the water, trying to see if there was any nutritional value whatsoever. There was none at all, and I was unable to continue with my journey for a day due to an extremely troubled stomach. I decided that I would rather go without and continue the journey.
I didn't know how much time it took, but I finally came across a small village. Like usual, I waited until night to roam. That's when I saw it. Must have been stray cattle, a lost sheep. It was freshly shaven, a lamb. It looked so lost in the darkness. Surely it was fate for me to come across it, for it to walk towards me without fear. I stripped of my ripped, dirt covered shirt and tied it around the lamb's neck. I lead it out of the village and back to the tree. My new found hope had added a spring to my weak step.
I'm not sure what I expected the creature to do. It got to the field and immediately began to graze, eating a select few blades of grass. I watched it intently, how it moved, how it managed to live off the minute amount of food, and still managing to stand. Still managing to run through the fields. I envied the animal. The way it seemed to have such an easy life. The way it didn't need to worry about where its next meal was coming from; it would manage to find something from the most unlikely places. I hated the way it mocked me, laying by the tree, without energy and defenceless. The way it ran rings around me, circling me, taunting me. Making fun of me.
I remember it perfectly. The anger ripped through me, slicing right through me, setting me on fire. Like a child tearing paper. With the last ounce of energy I could muster, I scrambled to my feet. The pain was crippling; I could feel my insides churning, telling my brain to retreat, settle back down, accept defeat. I couldn't admit that I was dying. I couldn't die. Not yet.
I stood under the shelter of the tree. I leant against it, catching my breath from the struggle of getting to my feet. My eyes were blurry, struggling to stay open, desperate to fight my need for sleep, for rest. But I couldn't sleep; I might have missed rain fall.
The animal was peaceful, lying in the dry dirt. It basked under the stars, its chest heaving, nostrils flaring; the whole animal was taunting me, even in its sleep. Anger, once again, coursed through my veins. This time I couldn't control it with just a few deep breaths. I bent down on my knees, leaning over the sleeping form. I growled at what I was about to do; it was so primal.
A matter of life or death.
I couldn't die.
I took the neck of the animal between my hands. The animal had awoken under my touch, but I didn't care. Its weak struggled seemed like caressing feathers against my skin compared to the desperate anger. The desperate want. The intoxicating, inescapable need. I looked at the animal and it stared back at me, knowing the danger, terror turning the eyes black.
I had to.
I needed to.
I couldn't die.
With a quick, jarred flick of both wrists, it was dead. A click of its neck vibrated under my hands, and I felt warm liquid seep onto my finger tips. The skin of the animal had cracked under the pressure, releasing deep red onto my fingers, staining them. I hesitantly brought my fingers up to my nose, smelling it. It smelt the most appetizing thing in the world. Devine. Any sense of morals were gone, hidden under the carpet of sin. Lost forever in Pandora's secret box.
I wasn't thinking, yet even if I had tried to form a coherent thought, I doubt I would have obeyed it. It was necessary for me to live, and I couldn't die. Not yet.
Authors note; A complete and utter dedication to the most amazing person in the world, Kelsey.
Love you, Kay. :)