The following is one of several author interviews that was conducted by the Snarry discussion group SeverusSighs. The questions were created by members as well as the webmistresses (WhiteCotton, myself, Torina and Lupa).

I'm publishing it on because of the little story that goes along with the interview. Credit for the beginning goes to WhiteCotton. I take up the middle and the very end belong to Torina.

It's a rather silly attempt at self-deprecating humor on my part. Please review and let me know if you liked it. And thanks goes to everyone at SeverusSighs for such successful author interviews.

An interview with atypicalsnowman

December, 2008

"What the hell!" Eyes wide, atypicalsnowman raked her eyes over the black clad form just entering the Leaky Cauldron. Billowing black robes snapped as the figure strode towards the sofa, as did the smirk above the heavily starched white collar. "Why are you wearing that outfit?"

"I couldn't find my clothes," White Cotton replied. "So Severus lent me his."

Atypicalsnowman slid a glass of red wine towards her friend, before taking a fortifying gulp of her own. "O-kay."

"Torina's running late; she said about five minutes. Where's Lupa? Is she -" Her wine glass flew through the air as a white lump of fur landed on her lap.

"White Cotton! Miss me?"

"No. And Severus is going to kill me if this robe is stained. It's already covered in… But never mind. Yes, Lupa dearest, I did miss you." White Cotton half stood to brush her robes of wine and wolf fur, and wolf.

"Hey, guys. Sorry I'm late." Torina, panting slightly, scattered parchment and books as she circled the sofa to hug her friends. "Oops, sorry, darling," she said sheepishly.

Retrieving the fallen quill from her cleavage, snow asked, "So. Who's first?" She looked up to see three pairs of eyes staring at her. "I guess that will be me, then."

snow takes up the story…

snow smiled and said into her glass of house red, "Lovely vintage, White Cotton. What year is it?"

Torina rolled her eyes and said, "Quit stalling, snow, you're not fooling anybody."

snow nestled into her seat before taking another sip. "I'm not stalling... I'm merely showing my appreciation for..."

She was cut off abruptly when Lupa threw herself into her lap, fur flying everywhere including her glass.

"Well, that's done then, " she said putting her glass down in disappointment.

White Cotton sighed at the antics of the other three. She brought her hands together and said in a low voice, "snow, darling, you know why we're here. This isn't so much an interview as it is an...." The woman trailed off.

"An intervention," chimed in Torina, looking over her piles of parchment, quill in hand. "Seriously, snow, you need to decide which Snape you're using in your story."

snow looked around nervously at the other women. She began mentally estimating the time it would take her to reach the door. "What do you mean which Snape? There's just Snape, he's just.... he's Snape. You know... Snarky and sexy and dark.... all around evil git but you like him that way. Snape."

White Cotton extended a hand, admiring her well manicured nails and said, "snow, darling, you know that's not what we meant. Plus, we all know how much you love bottom!Snape..." she trails off a bit as she shudders.

snow sits up and protests loudly. "Hey, that's just a kink! That's not what I write..."

White Cotton brushes her off and waves a hand through the air. "Yes, darling, you keep saying that. But we honestly can't tell which Snape you've put in your story and it's beginning to get a bit mad in here..."

She pointed around the room and snow realized that she'd been followed.

"Oh, no. What's he doing here?" Lupa looked up from snow's lap over to the corner.

A man in black robes was sitting on the floor, facing the wall. There was music coming from his general directions and it seemed like.... was he cutting himself?

"Oh, him?" Torina pointed in the direction in which the music playing. "That's emo!Snape. snow doesn't even mean to write him that way.... He just shows up sometimes and won't leave."

White Cotton's face contorted into something akin to horror. "Good God, is he listening to the Cure?"

snow shuddered and sank more into her seat. "Yeah, Boys Don't Cry. It's kind of been on non-stop since Lily died."

"Gah!" White Cotton exclaimed and finished the rest of her drink. "And his nails are painted black."

"Yeah," snow said, nodding slowly, "he likes black."

Torina drew their attention away from the sobbing figure in the corner and pointed to another. "What about him? He tends to pop up as well."

The other three women followed her pointed figure to the corner where Professor Snape, potions professor and master spy was glaring at them from the corner. There was no air circulating through the room and he was standing completely still, yet somehow his robes were billowing around him. His glare was strong enough to melt ice and his wand was in hand.

White Cotton perked up and lit a cigarette. "Now that's more like it. This Snape probably comes with his own set of handcuffs."

Torina blushed and Lupa giggled into snow's robes. snow looked over at the potions master, still staring at the women, daring one of them to approach him.

"Yes, he's lovely but..."

"Yes, exactly. But," Torina said, adjusting her glasses. She checked off something on her roll of parchment and said, "There's still him to deal with. He's nearly as bad as emo!Snape but twice as vocal."

From another corner in the room Severus Snape approached them, black clad and robes billowing. White Cotton grinned and leaned back, taking a sip of her wine and if she traced the rim with her tongue a bit no one said anything.

"Good evening. Have any of you ladies..." Snape trailed off and glanced at Lupa who was being petted by snow and scoffed, "or wolf seen a certain green-eyed cretin? He probably stumbled in here some time ago waving his wand about like some half-wit dressed like a street urchin."

White Cotton was about to offer to keep Snape company while he waited for Harry to arrive when suddenly the door swung open. A young man with messy black hair and atrocious glasses stumbled in looking around at the various Snapes and finally deciding the one in front of the four women was his.

"Hello, Snape. Oh, hello, ladies." Harry's face lit up with a genuine smile as he grinned at the four women sitting at the table. Torina and Lupa instantly perked up and stumbled over their 'hellos' while snow smiled and White Cotton scoffed.

"Harry, where have you been?" Snape approached Harry but stopped short of taking him in his arms. "Do you not realize that every moment you're out of my presence is like agony to me? You're the only bright shining light in my miserable excuse for a life and the only time I've ever received an ounce of happiness is when I'm with you."

"Ugh!" groaned White Cotton. "snow!" she exclaimed and put her hand over her face. "You invited noblysuffering!Snape?"

snow cuddled Lupa close, partly for comfort and partly for defense. "I'm sorry! I had to! He follows me around even more than emo!Snape."

She glanced back to emo!Snape's corner. It looked like he ceased cutting himself but was now looking at a picture of Lily and crying. snow sighed and turned back to Snape and Harry in front of her.

Harry was grinning at Snape but said, "Ha, very funny you git. We all know you hate me and only tolerate me because of your overwhelming guilt complex." Harry put his hands in his pocket and looked down as he asked, "Come on, though, we are friends, right?"

It was sad how hopeful Harry looked just then.

Snape sighed as his gaze reached the floor and a long-fingered hand rubbed his temple.

"Alright." White Cotton put out her cigarette in snow's tarnished wine glass and stood up. "I can maybe deal with noblysuffering!Snape, but clueless!Harry? No, that's where I draw the line."

snow cringed. "I'm sorry. I swear they just follow me everywhere! I can't help it."

White Cotton looked very put out and exclaimed, "Sorry, darling but I'm leaving with the potions professor and master spy. I tried but I can't do this."

Quite suddenly noblysuffering!Snape reminded everyone of his presence. In a deep voice he snapped, "On the contrary, you most certainly can and you will, madam. Otherwise, you'll be forced to put up with that one," Snape paused, gesturing to emo!Snape in the corner who seemed to be writing in a journal and whispering 'for you, love.' "For the rest of what I assure you will be a very short, miserable life." Snape growled and released his full-on death glare at White Cotton who glared back in equal measure. After a slow count to three, she waved a careless hand and sat down, leaning back again in her seat, a picture of elegance.

"Er, yeah. About noblysuffering!Snape... he really only does it for Harry. You know, with the love and all. Otherwise he really is just Snape." snow said as she looked down at her hands.

Harry frowned and looked confused. "He does what for me now?"

All five of them groaned.


Q. 1.a: How did you start writing fanfiction?

I never even knew fanfiction existed until maybe two years ago or so. I was at work (bored) and was on . They had an article on HP FF, but specifically about slash and mpreg. It was a very well written article about the nature of FF and the fan base. I went home that night and searched for some. After about a year and a half of that, I developed my personal love of Snarry and a plot bunny formed in my head. It just grew and grew until I put it down on my computer. I adore the pairing so much I just had to do my own.

Q. 1.b: Why did you start to write Slash?

The simple answer is 'because it's hot.' Truly, it's because I have a difficult time getting into the heads of women. That's not to say I don't get along with women. However, I've always gotten along better with men and have few girlfriends. So it's honestly just easier for me to write men. If I ever wrote a girl character, I'd probably wouldn't be able to writer her properly. My beta, Torina, makes fun of the fact that there are no female characters in my story. Hermione and McGonagall have so far only popped in for a few chapters.

Q. 2.a: Which Harry Potter character is your favourite?

Severus Snape.

Q. 2.b: Which character do you enjoy writing most?

I love writing Snape. He's a challenge. It taxes the mind to write such a complex man. However, it is easier to write Harry.

Q. 3: What is it about Severus *sighs* that is sexy?

Gosh, what isn't? First, he's the only character in JKR's world that has any kind of depth. He's the dark mysterious semi-villain for most of the story and yet you know something is there. Something more. Everyone else wears their hearts and their entire character development on their sleeves. Snape is mysterious and therefore incredibly sexy. The fact that he is portrayed by the very sexy Alan Rickman doesn't hurt at all.

Q. 4: Is he a top or a bottom?

Both. And I don't mean he's versatile (although I love stories where he is) but I mean that is makes perfect (canon) sense to have him be either. I can see him as totally a top. He's so tired of being used by more powerful men than him and he demands to take the lead in the bedroom. Also, it makes sense that he would be the dominate person with Harry, seeing as how he is older, more experienced.

However, it also makes sense that he's a bottom. He has a submissive streak a mile long. He's tired and weary and he's been used by two powerful men for most of his life. It makes perfect sense to me that he would allow Harry to take the reins; to rest and allow himself to be cared for, even if it's only out of selfishness, as in allowing Harry to do all the work.

Q. 5.a: Of your own work, which is your favourite…?

I have only the one story right now so I'll just give you chapters: Chapter 7, Your Hand in Mine, and chapter 14, Evidence of Things Unseen.

The former I like because I struggled to find a way for Snape to stop seeing Harry as a boy and start seeing him as a man. Apparently the only way to do that was to get him drugged up. The only way I could see him falling for Harry was to put him in a situation where he had no idea who Harry was.

The latter because I finally got to write a scene in which Harry mourns. I think there's so much death in FF but so little mourning. There's a good deal of sulking and depression, but not true mourning. I really wanted to write a story where something terrible happened but didn't have Harry being alright after two chapters.

Q. 5.b: ... And which is your least… ?

Chapter Four: It's Hard but it's Harder to Ignore it. I had a very hard time showing Harry's inner monologue.

Q. 5.c: … And which one do you think is your most underappreciated work?

Ha. My work is over-appreciated.

Q. 6: Is your world (written or dreamed) more canon or strictly fanon?

I try to be canon as much as possible. I love stories that are based in reality, or as much as the HP world would dictate. For me, that means staying true to canon.

Q. 7: Who do you most like to see in Severus' *sighs* bed?


Q.8.a: What's your favourite kink to write…?

I haven't really written them yet. The only 'kink' (if you can call it that) so far is the use of hands in every scene. Right now in my story, Harry is very unaware of his own sexuality or Snape's. But he does notice his hands. It'll be the key to his undoing.

Q. 8.b: … and to read?

When it comes to reading my favorite kink it is bottom!snape. Only because he's so very strong and I just love seeing him submit a bit to Harry.

Q. 9: How much time do you dedicate to writing fanfiction?

Quite a bit. My beta does as well. For example, the other day we spend four hours hammering out a plot hole.

Q. 10: Do you write original work?

Not yet but I hope to.

Q. 11: Fluff or angst; heartache or heartbreak?

Give me angst and heartache over fluff any day. Let me drag our boys through the mud and dirt and give them hell. It makes it 'so' much better when things finally end up right.

Q. 12: Do you find writing slash sex scenes difficult or easy?

I don't know yet but I'm a bit nervous.

Q. 13: What's the strangest review you've ever received and why?

Oh, Lord. Someone asked me if Snape was going to brew some special polyjuice so Remus would never feel the affects of the full moon ever again.

Q. 14: Do you listen to any particular music when writing?

There's a scene in chapter 15 towards the end. It wasn't coming out right at all then all of a sudden my itunes started playing Colorblind by the Counting Crows. It came much easier after that. Typically when writing I listen to classical or silence.

Q. 15: Is there any classic literature that has directly influenced your stories? If so, what and how?

Yes, Dune, Romeo and Juliet and, believe it or not, the Bible. The idea of Fate being something that is not totally inevitable and that you have to take some kind of responsibility for it comes from Dune. That story has influenced me more than I thought. When I started writing I saw the effect right away.

Romeo and Juliet because of the prose. I buried one of my characters "underneath a grove of sycamore trees" and Harry tells Snape he had his forgiveness "before he did request it."

There are actually many Biblical references within the story, starting with chapter titles but also going into theme. There's an upcoming scene that I'm looking forward to writing that takes a page from Exodus. (No, not that scene; how would Harry part the Red Sea?)

Q. 16: How fast do you write, approximately?

Chapters usually take a week or week and a half to write.

Q. 17: Do you have a specific writing process or do you just sit down and write away?

I reread my last chapter. Then I go sit outside on my car, lay back and let the story come for about half an hour or so. I lay out the entire chapter in my head then come back and write it. Before I quit smoking, I would do this with a cigarette.

Q. 18: Do you ever get bored with writing about the same characters, the same sex scenes?

Not yet but it's my first story.

Q. 19: How do you feel about being such an icon of fanfiction?


Q. 20: Your story has really taken off and is well-reviewed. Do you feel possessive of it?

Totally. It's the first work of fiction I've ever written, unless you count a short story I wrote in 8th grade.

Q. 21: How important is canon to you when writing Pains and Contradictions?

Very. In fact, I have my own canon beta, White Cotton. I have veered from canon somewhat, but that's a conscious choice. I hate when I've forgotten something from canon and it becomes a plot hole. For example, in my story Lucius was in his 6th year when Snape came to Hogwarts instead of his 7th. I got called on that right away.

Q. 22: Do you plan to write one-shots and drabbles between chapters of Pains and Contradictions?

Yes. I responded to a challenge from the last chapter from my beta, Torina. That was a lot of fun and gave me an opportunity to put something out that was really just for the two of us.

Q.23: What would you be wearing if given complete freedom: Gothic, Elizabethan ruffles, Regency style or something else? Please describe.

That would be lovely but usually it's a t shirt and jeans; sometimes pyjamas. I suppose if this is a fantasy world I'd be wearing something Audrey Hepburn would have worn in Sabrina.

Q.24: Please provide a link to your site or to the archive where you submit most of your stories.


Q. 25: Is there anything you wish to tell the membership of Severus Sighs about your writing and experiences in the fanfiction world?

Everyone has been so kind and the experience has been so worthwhile. I'm just having so much fun with the world and particularly with the lovely people at Severus Sighs.

… Some time later

"All right, last question," said Lupa. She set her quill down and looked up at snow, a maniacal gleam in her eye. "When is Harry finally going to get a clue?"

Harry frowned, confusion etched onto his features, and all three Snapes froze. White Cotton leaned forward in her chair, eager to hear the answer to the question as well. Torina and snow exchanged a knowing glance, but before snow could reply Harry blurted out "What are you talking about? Get a clue about what?" The Snapes looked nervous, Lupa and White Cotton looked angry at him for talking over the answer to their question, and snow and Torina's grins grew wider. Harry crossed his arms. "Snape-" all three Snapes turned to look at him- "what are they talking about?"

The Snapes exchanged an anxious glance, but snow simply smiled and said, "That's for me to know and you to find out." White Cotton and Lupa groaned, Harry frowned, and all three Snapes sighed in relief. Suddenly White Cotton blinked, grinned, and turned to whisper something in Lupa's ear. When she moved away they were both wearing identical maniacal grins, and snow and Torina inched a tiny bit away.

"That's all right, snow," said White Cotton, taking a sip from her glass. "You don't have to tell us anything." Neither woman was reassured, and after a moment White Cotton continued, "We will just blackmail Torina into telling us."

Torina jumped from her chair with a small but audible "eep!" and hid behind snow's. "Snow… You'll protect me, right?" By now both of them were incredibly nervous.

"Sure I will, dear," said snow. "But maybe it's a good idea for us to get out of here right now…" The two began slowly backing away from their still-grinning fellow Webmistresses, palpable fear in their eyes. When they were about ten feet from the door they turned and ran, fleeing for their very lives. Lupa and White Cotton simply laughed.

"You can run, darlings, but you can't hide," White Cotton called, even though she knew they couldn't hear her. "Now," she said, switching her attention to the three Snapes, "which one of you is coming home with me?"

On behalf of Severus Sighs, we would very much like to thank atypicalsnowman for taking part in this interview.

The Webmistresses

Enjoy the darkness and sweet sensual pleasure that is Severus *sighs*

The Webmistresses of Severus Sighs

Site Owner – WhiteCotton

Site Moderators – Torina, atypicalsnowman, and Lupa

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