the problem is between the chair and the desk

It was hard for Ukitake to concentrate on his paperwork with a naked woman lying on top of it. "It would be a great deal easier if you were to turn into a cat again," he remarked.

"Bah," Yoruichi said, waving her toes in the air. "There's just something about air on bare flesh."

"Isn't it the same as air on fur?"

"No," Yoruichi said. She twiddled an end of her hair. "Imagine your scalp bare. Something like that."

Ukitake ruefully touched his own hair. "I remember when it was shorter," he remarked.

"So do I," she sighed.

"Yoruichi-san," Ukitake said, in his most determined tone of voice, "is there some specific reason why you are visiting me like this?"

"Catching up with old friends," she said. "My student's asleep. I thought we could have a little heart-to-heart about current goings-on. I didn't expect to find you neck-deep in paperwork at three in the morning."

Ukitake sighed. "I had a slight relapse recently. My Third Seats have been trying to keep things under control, but there's only so much they can do. And given I can do nothing about other things . . . Do you feel like countersigning some reports for me?"

Yoruichi propped her chin on her hands. "I can see it now. Countersigned by Shihouin Yoruichi, Second Division Captain, Absent."

"Well," Ukitake said, with as casual a smile as he could manage, "since you're here to discuss the current situation, I dare say the paperwork can wait."

"And to seduce you," Yoruichi added.

Ukitake's inkbrush jumped in his hand. Ink spattered all over the current report. "What?"

"Seduce you," Yoruchi said, breathing deeply. Her breasts swung backwards and forwards, nipples brushing the paperwork.

"Yoruichi-san!" Ukitake exclaimed. "You can't seduce me on my own desk!"

"Ah," Yoruichi said, "I can, will, and am doing."

"I'm not seduced," Ukitake said firmly.

"I'm working on it." She straightened her left leg and raised it behind her, propping it up with her bent right leg, then tilted so that her left foot was nestled somewhere behind her ear. "My back needs a scratch. Hint, hint."

"Is this a time for seduction?" Ukitake asked the ceiling.

"Well, I wasn't actually planning to seduce you," Yoruichi said confidingly. "But when I walked in here --"

"Naked," Ukitake sighed.

"-- naked," Yoruichi added, "to avoid anyone seeing any suspicious cats --"

"Just suspicious naked women."

"Exactly. When I walked in here, as I was saying, I was struck by how different it all seemed. You sitting there at your desk in the glow of a single lamp, head bowed, weary --"

Ukitake coughed hopefully.

"-- devoted to your duty," she went on, "stern yet focused, severe and manly, the lines of your face in stark relief, your skin soft enough to fondle, your eyes deep-set onyx . . ."

Ukitake considered that. "You aren't going to succeed," he said sternly. "We're far too busy to even consider spending the night on my desk."

"What's wrong with your bed?"

"I can't leave my desk. I might be needed --"

Yoruichi launched herself across the desk like a -- well, like a cat, and Ukitake would have been able to find a better synonym for it if her arms weren't locked around his neck and her lips on his and her tongue in his mouth.

Several minutes later, he said firmly, "No."

"But can I keep on trying?" Yoruichi asked, insinuating herself between him and the desk.

"Well," Ukitake said, groin cutting in on brain and redirecting certain comments about paperwork, "we have got all night."