Disclaimer: I do not own Twilight, I do not own Christmas. But if I did own Christmas, I'd declare myself Santa and bring each and every one of you and Edward clone. Now, wouldn't I rock? And wouldn't it rock to ride in a sleigh with a bag full of Edwards? ;)

This was written for BritishBitches Smutvent Calender. The beginning…kinda depressing, but not all Christmases are togetherness and laughs. It does have a nice ending, along with a smut-tacular lemon (I love me my lemons). I hope you all had a Merry Christmas and Happy Holidays!!!!

I hope you enjoy it and it makes your holidays a bit wetter…lol. ON WITH IT…


The way he treated me was never what I deserved anyway. At least that's what I kept thinking as I walked the streets at night in the city as I pulled my jacket closer to my body and my boots clopped on the snow dusted sidewalk.

It was Christmas Eve and I was spending it alone, but I couldn't stay in my empty apartment any longer, not by myself. Being by myself was nothing but trouble. If I stayed there I knew what would follow. I would sit on the couch and think about why he left me. Why he did all the things he did. No, he didn't treat me the way I deserved, but at least for that short while I had someone in my life. Someone that wanted me in at least some way.

So as families did last minute shopping for their Christmas morning, I walked the streets aimlessly. I had spent time actually curling my usually straight hair to perfection and putting on make up to hid the bruises and make me look more like a model than the homebody I was. Anything that took time and concentration to ensure my mind wouldn't wander.

There was a small pub that I remember from my college days on the right side of the street. Through the windows I could see that there were some people in there, all of them laughing and most likely drunk. Never really my scene, but it was better than the freezing cold, and much better than being alone.

I crossed the street in a light jog, my feet really starting to feel the high heeled boots I was wearing and I was thankful that there would be some empty stools at the bar and restaurant for me to sit down. The hot air hit me as I opened the door, and along with it the usual smell of smoke.

The pub was filled with mostly men, the average one being middle aged and balding with a couple on the older side and very few younger than that. It all seemed as if they turned to stare at me when I walked through the door. I clutched my red, knee length, red coat even closer to my body, suddenly very away of the so called "hooker" boots I was wearing and the bit of skin that showed before my dress ended.

I sat myself down at a stool at the bar as Christmas music rang out from the stage that was at the back of the pub and a dance floor in front of that crowded with what looked to be a younger crowd. On the stage was a man wearing flannel as he belted out "Deck the Halls" and all the men at the bar continued to sing along as they swayed with one another and laughed as if they had all been close friends.

It managed to put a smile on my face for the first time in so long…too long. I ordered a bottle of Miller Lite, not really sure that I would even stay there long enough to drink the bottle, but it felt wrong not to at least have a drink.

"Merry Christmas, pretty lady," the man to the right of me smiled as he held up his bottled beer as well.

"Merry Christmas to you as well," I said, clinking my glass with his. He was and older gentleman but his smile was warm and gentle.

He tugged on the arm of his friend and he looked at his friend and then to me. "Look at this sweetheart sitting here, alone on Christmas Eve. Isn't that a shame, Gary?"

"Why aren't you with your family…..?"

"Bella," I told him. "I don't have any family. Not anymore," I told him.

"Well then, tonight, consider yourself part of ours, right Jim?"

The men smiled at me and then ordered up another round of beers. As we talked, my jacket slipped off to reveal the black knee length dress I was wearing for the night. Gary and Jim were nice and introduced me to what they referred to as "their family". They too had no one left and met at the pub many years ago on a Christmas Eve just like this one. It had been a tradition of theirs ever since.

They forced me to sing along (quietly as I could) with the people on the stage that would do karaoke of the traditional Christmas songs, and in doing so, I found my smile had returned as I awkwardly sang Jingle Bells with a bunch of strangers.

"Alice this is ridiculous!" I heard a voice ring out at the end of the song. It sounded annoyed but still had a tone like poured honey. "Rose, I can't believe you're going along with this!"

"Oh have a little fun, Edward," I heard as a short, pixie like girl danced past me with a blond male in tow with a slight smile on his face. She sounded awfully chipper, though it was Christmas Eve, and that's the tone most people should have.

"Besides, Carlisle and Esme didn't leave for the night for nothing. They're having fun too," I blonde added as the guys at the bar whistled at her. She was worthy of them too, with a body of a super model and the face of an angel she could get anyone she wanted. And the one she wanted looked to be a body building curly headed man that had the cutest dimples as he smiled at his girl. What I would give to be looked at like that.

And then, as if in slow motion, he walked by. His black peat cot ha just a few remaining flakes of snow and his hands were shoved into his pockets. He ran a hand through a mess of bronze locks that looked like he could be in a hair gel advertisement as he let out a sigh. And when my brain was able to function again, I realized…I knew him.

He was Edward Cullen, himself. The Greek God of my old high school. We had had two classes together and he ignored me in both, of course back then, everyone ignored me. I think I borrowed him a pencil once though.

His head turned towards me and his green eyes shone even brighter than they did in my memories as our eyes locked and I watched as he oh so famous crooked smile appeared on his face. Then he turned back and continued walking.

I let out a breath I didn't know I was holding as my suddenly stick straight back slouched back against the bar.

"Whoa," Jim said.

"Yeah," Gary agreed.

"What?" I asked as I took a swig of my beer and put it back on the bar.

"You could cut the sexual tension between the two of you with a butter knife!" Jim said with a chuckle as he too took a drink.

"Fuck, you could cut it with a spoon! Do you know him?" Gary asked.

My eyebrows knitted together as I watched the rest of who I knew to be the Cullen family (it all coming back to me) hang their coats on the back of chairs before sitting down together. "Yeah I went to high school with him, a long time ago," I told them as I watched the family.

"You should go talk to him," Jim urged and I looked to him to find him wiggling his eyebrows.

I laughed. "No! I would never do something like that. I'm the kind of girl that's forward," I assured him taking another drink.

"Then we'll just have to think of another way for you to get him," Gary said, nodding to Jim.

"Get him? I'm not getting anything, so just leave it alone, guys," I told them.

"You could be getting something tonight if you just talked to him," Gary chuckled before drinking his MGD down and ordering another one.

"So, you never did tell us why you're here tonight. No boy at home to spend the evening with?"

I sighed and swung my stool around to explain the story to them.

"I just got out of a bad relationship," I started before I went into details. I didn't give away anything too specific, like the way James, my ex, would hit me, just that he didn't treat me well and I had found him more than once with a girl…in my bedroom that he just so happened to be fucking at the time. After each time he assured me it was nothing and that I was the one he loved. Until he met Victoria. I almost felt sorry for the new girl. I wondered if he would treat her the same way he did me.

"So here I am," I concluded. "I just couldn't stay alone tonight. Not tonight of all nights."

"Then don't be alone."

I froze, as my eyes widened and I looked at Jim and Gary like a deer caught in headlights, knowing that neither of their lips had moved, and that the silky smooth voice that had spoken did not belong to the two older gentleman in front of me.

Then, I simply narrowed my eyes at them. "How long as he been behind me?" I asked in an icy tone. However, I must not have been too threatening because they merely laughed and drank their beers.

"Only a few moments, Bella Swan," Edward said.

I turned in my stool, trying to keep the same glare I had for the pair now sitting behind me, but I could almost feel it melt from my face as he looked at me. "That…that's rude," I breathed, disappointed at my lack of anger.

"I do apologize, but I would think it would be even ruder to interrupt. I'm Edward Cullen," he said sticking his hand out, as if anyone could forget him. "We used to go to high school together." I took his hand silently, and apparently he took that as me not remembering. "We had Biology and Trig together. I think I borrowed a pencil from you once."

I couldn't help it, I had to laugh at that. "I remember that!" I told him.

"Okay I know that sounds lame, but you don't need to make fun of me for it," he said, looking away.

I giggled at the dejected look on his face. It was just so adorable. "No, I mean I actually remember that," I laughed again.

After a few more minutes of talking and catching up with one another, he brought me to the table he and his family were sitting at, re-introducing me to everyone. The more I talked with the family, the more I found each and every single one of them irresistible. They were just so fun and carefree, not to mention it was amazing to see the way Emmett and Jasper would look at Rose and Alice. I could almost feel the love radiating from these couples.

A man had just finished singing "Deck the Halls" when Alice looked at me with an evil smile. "Bella! You used to have such a great singing voice in chorus! You should sing for us!"

"No, Alice. Just…no," was my simple response.

"Oh come on, bring us a little Christmas cheer," Emmett laughed.

"Emmett I refuse to sing a song that's all merry and gay on a night that I'm not really feeling any of that," I told him. "Believe me, I would make everyone feel like crying," I laughed.

"So?" Rose asked, looking at me. "They're singing Christmas songs because that's what they think they're supposed to feel. It's superficial. But everyone has had one of those Christmases that you cry during. Everyone has felt or will feel what you are feeling right now. Not for the exact reasons, but they will feel it."

"So feel it for them. Make sure they all know that you're feeling it. This is your one Christmas, and after this, you'll have the rest of them to look forward to," Jasper told me.

"Sing whatever you feel," Alice nodded at me.

"It would make our Christmas," Edward whispered into my ear.

I looked at all their faces, urging me to do what they had said. With a sigh, I pushed my chair back and walked up onto the stage.

I looked through the songs listed for the machine, before stepping up to the microphone.

"This isn't a Christmas song, it's just how I feel. But you're all here, instead of with your families for a reason. This is mine."

The song started and I sang out quietly with it.

If I were a boy
Even just for a day
I'd roll outta bed in the morning
And throw on what I wanted then go
Drink beer with the guys
And chase after girls
I'd kick it with who I wated
And I'd never get confronted for it.
Cause they'd stick up for me.

My voice grew stronger with the chorus.

If I were a boy
I think I could understand
How it feels to love a girl
I swear I'd be a better man.
I'd listen to her
Cause I know how it hurts
When you lose the one you wanted
Cause he's taken you for granted
And everything you had got destroyed

If I were a boy
I could turn off my phone
Tell everyone it's broken
So they'd think that I was sleepin' alone
I'd put myself first
And make the rules as I go
Cause I know that she'd be faithful
Waitin' for me to come home (to come home)


It's a little too late for you to come back
Say its just a mistake
Think I'd forgive you like that
If you thought I would wait for you
You thought wrong


But you're just a boy
You don't understand
Yeah you don't understand
How it feels to love a girl someday
You wish you were a better man
You don't listen to her
You don't care how it hurts
Until you lose the one you wanted
Cause you've taken her for granted
And everything you have got destroyed
But you're just a boy

The entire pub was silent when I had stopped and I realized I had tears rolling silently down my face, as did almost the entire room. Then, all at once, they started clapping.

My cheeks flaming red, I stepped off stage, and into the arms of Edward as a new song started to play. Another song that had nothing to do with Christmas as he pulled me closer to the dance floor where the rest of his family was dancing slowly to the music now playing (Buckcherry's Sorry).

I let my head lay on his shoulder as he held me close as we swayed back and forth to the rhythm. Then, he suddenly pulled back and lifted my chin with his finger. "I'm not just a boy, Bella. I want you to know that."

I smiled gently up at him, my eyes closing for only a moment, and in that moment his lips touched mine and I could feel how soft and smooth they were. Like kissing a rose petal. His lips moved softly and gently as if he was afraid I would break if he was too rough with me.

Everything from there until my back hit a mattress was a blur of taxi rides and stolen kisses. But none of that mattered the moment my boots were unzipped and my dress pooled to the floor along with Edward's clothing.

"Edward, we shouldn't," I spoke what was going through my head, though no other part of me wanted to stop as he kissed his way down my neck.

"No, you need this. And I want this. I've thought about this for so long," he whispered against the skin covering my collar bone.

"What?" I asked, not really coherent with the things he was doing to me, his fingertips brushing up and down my bare sides.

"Bella," he chuckled against my skin, "I've had a major crush on you since high school," he whispered as his hand went closer to my bra covered chest.

"I would think about you all during class and then, when I'd come home, have to jump in the shower to stop the very dirty thoughts that were in my head from becoming a reality," he kissed down until the barrier of my bra became a problem and then removed it quickly.

"Oh?" was all I could breathe out as my hands went to grab at his muscular shoulders.

"Mmm," he moaned when he removed me bra and could see how perky my tits were from the things he had been doing. "Mhm. Sometimes I'd come home and lock myself in my room, strip down and lay on my bed as I thought about how tight that perfect little pussy would be around my cock."

I let out a little mewing noise as I felt him press against me, my underwear starting to pool with precum. His hands moved up to massage my breasts, pinching at the already hardened peaks, before taking my left one into his mouth, my chest raising up to his face, wanting him to take in more.

But he pulled away and his hands went to remove my underwear. Once they were off, instead of throwing them to the floor the way I thought he would, I watched as he brought the soaked material up to his mouth, and saw his pink tongue dart out to lick the clear juices that were left on the material.

"Fuck Edward," I whispered, my eyes closing at the sight as I felt the need to squirm around or touch myself. My hand started to move down my stomach when my eyes opened in time to find Edward disregarding the underwear as he watched my fingers with wide eyes.

I cupped myself, letting my fingers run up my slit to collect the overflowing juices from my soaked pussy, before bringing my hand up to my mouth to lick clean.

"Oh my fuck!" I heard him whisper out as the bulge in his boxer briefs became even more pronounced. My fingers went down to my pink lips again as Edward stripped off his last article of clothing, revealing his hard, stiff erection. His head was already beading with precum as he started to stroke it once I inserted two fingers into my tight, wet, pussy.

"Ah," he groaned out as his head fell back, his hand grasping his big, thick cock as he pumped it up and down. But he couldn't stop watching me, his head came up again so you could see as I fingered myself to the sight of him until he breathed out, "Stop."

I did immediately and his jaw was clenched tightly as he stopped his own pleasure as well. His hands came down to my knees and pushed them out, spreading my legs more than they had already been, before lowering his face down between them.

His face was so close to my dripping cunt, that if he moved a mere inch, his nose would be soaked with the wet liquid oozing from my body. I could feel his light, hot breath against my even hotter skin as he breathed out, and then, the sound of him inhaling through his nose.

"You smell even sweeter than I thought you would," he whispered, his breath hitting my wet skin and making me shiver.

"You've thought about this?" I couldn't stop myself from asking. I wanted him to talk. I wanted to hear all the things he would do as he thought about me, whether they were true or not.

"Oh yes, Bella Swan. I'd take a shower each night before I went to bed and turn the water on so hot that the bathroom would fog. When I got in, I would think about how I would fuck you against the wall of the shower. How your legs would wrap around my waist as I thrust into that tight pussy. I'd stroke my cock thinking about how you would milk me when you came."

I was breathing so hard, my chest was rising and falling, making my tits bounce with the movement, the whole time, his breath hit my pussy, making me ache so much, it was hard to tell if it was more pain or pleasure.

"Ooooohhh!" I whimpered as I tried to buck my hips up at his face, but he must've suspected that to happen, because his hands were on my hips, holding me down.

He chuckled at my reaction and then leaned in to kiss my wet lips, making me scream out.

"I think I found something," he chuckled again. "Do you like hearing me talk about jerking my cock to you, Bella? Hmm?" he asked, his silky voice now slightly husky.

"Oh god, yes!" I yelled out.

"Like hearing about how I'd pop a boner thinking about you constantly? At home during dinner, watching television, at school at lunch, at night. Mmmm, Bella, especially at night. I'd rub my hard cock against my bed and hump my mattress thinking about you. Imagining how perky those tits would be if I could see them bare. Getting off to the thought of you at home on your bed, masturbating to me. Fuck I wanted you so bad it was hard not to bend you over one of those desks and tear into that tight pussy."

He was breathing hard as well by this point, and I was on the verge of coming just by listening to him talk. I bucked my hips again, only to be held down tighter. I screamed out in frustration and want.

"Edward Anthony Cullen!" I yelled out, thankful that it didn't ring out with the desperation I was feeling.

"Yes Bella Marie Swan?" he asked coolly.

"Fuck me!" I ordered.

"Mmm, it would be my pleasure."

And with those words, he crawled up my body and in one, hard, mind numbing thrust, his whole long, thick, cock was sheathed in my hot pussy. We let out groans in unison at the feeling and my head fell back against the pillow as he pulled out only to thrust back in again.

Each time he would pull out more and more, until only his head would remain inside me, and then thrust in harder. But that could only go on for so long. Both of us were wanting and horny as fuck. We needed our release.

So, I wrapped my legs around his perfect, V shaped waist and locked my heels on his back. I bucked up to meet each of this thrusts and he started to hump me harder and harder, grunting against the skin of my neck as I scratched and clawed at his back.

With a thrust so powerful, I swear I could feel it in my throat; I fell off the edge as the lights behind my eyes exploded with my orgasm, which pulled Edward down with it. I could feel his cock twitch inside me before blowing his hot, sticky load into my womb, the feeling making me come again immediately.

He rolled to the side, careful to keep himself inside me as he held me closer to his hot, sweaty body.

"Edward," I breathed.

"Hmm?" he asked sleepily.

"Mmm," was the only word I could think of to describe what we had just done, what I had just felt. He chuckled at my response and kissed the top of my head.

"I agree with your choice of words," he chuckled. "Is it alright if I just keep it like this for a while?" he asked in an embarrassed tone.

"Edward, I would love to feel you in me forever," I told him, kissing his bare chest and then licking the salty sweat from my lips.

We covered ourselves up with the comforter, knowing that we would get cold as the night went on. "Bella?" he asked as I was on the verge of unconsciousness, "Bella, will you spend Christmas with me and my family?" he whispered.

"What?" I asked, now fully awake.

"I want you to spend Christmas with us…as my girlfriend."

It was too soon, I knew that. But being with Edward, feeling the way he touched me and seeing the way he looked into my eyes, something about it felt so unbelievable right that it almost brought me to tears.

"I'd love to," I told him after swallowing the lump in my throat.

"Good," he sighed, bringing me impossibly close to his chest and we relaxed into one another's bodies. "Merry Christmas, love," he whispered.

I smiled at the nickname finally feeling the love that I never had before. "Merry Christmas, Edward."

Hope I could help to make your Holidays just a bit more steamy. Thanks to everyone that read and those of you reviewing. I love you guys and thanks for accepting me within this last year. Those that read my stories and shared your life with me were a HUGE part of what made 2008 so magical.

Much love to you from me,