Disclaimer: All Harry Potter related characters, places and themes belong to J.K. Rowling, Bloomsbury and Scholastic.
a/n: Well, here's the sequel. Don't hate me for taking forever! I hate myself enough for that. I hope you all enjoy it! The story title comes from the song Viva la Vida by Coldplay and the chapter title comes from the song The Scientist, also by Coldplay.
I have also changed my penname. I am now the CountessofAbe. :)
What I've Become
Chapter 1: Take Me Back to the Start
Boners. Erections. Hard-ons. Stiffies. Schlongs. Whatever you want to call them. The fact of the matter was that Zane Malfoy did not appreciate Wolf Lupin talking about them while they babysat.
"So, I thought to myself, how the hell am I going to hide this thing?" Wolf explained. "I was wearing some basketball shorts, and the heavens above know that those things don't hide diddlysquat. I swear I didn't know what to with myself. The girl is just standing there, waiting for me to say something and I'm trying to figure out how to inconspicuously untuck my shirt so that I can cover the damn thing."
Zane couldn't help but laugh, disgusted as he was with the topic. "What did you end up doing?"
"I just told her that I wasn't hungry anymore and left the stupid deli. I haven't had an accidental woody since those horrid first few years at Hogwarts. You'd think they would stop when we turn seventeen or something."
"Remember that time we were called into McGonagall's office and you got one right in the middle of her yelling at us?" Zane asked.
Wolf ran his hand down his face. "Oh, fuck, that was horrible. I think she thought I was turned on by her authority or something. It's not my fault the pair of thong underwear she had confiscated from Cecilia was accidentally left out on her desk."
"I know, you tell me that at least once a day," Wolf said with a smile. "I'm getting sleepy. When are your parents coming home?"
"It's only nine, mate. The night has barely started."
"You know how I get when it's almost time for the full moon," Wolf shrugged.
"Just the time of the full moon? You always fall asleep when you get bored. I think you might have narcolepsy," Zane laughed.
"Nah, we researched it, remember? Turns out I'm just strange. Plus, my dad's genes don't help much. Instead of turning into a werewolf, I just sleep," Wolf said.
"Well you and Blake share more in common than a seventeen-year-old should ever share with a ten-month-old," Zane said. "Same sleeping habits, same intelligence…"
"Oh, ha-ha, I'm dying of laughter, you prat," Wolf said with a roll of his eyes.
A shout was heard from upstairs. "ZANE! Deena won't leave me alone!" Lex, Zane's twelve-year-old brother, yelled.
"Deena, leave Lex alone!" Zane shouted back, "and don't yell! Blake's sleeping!"
"I'm not doing anything!" Deena shouted back. At the age of eight, she was the third oldest. "Lex is just being a meanie-head!"
"Lex, stop being a meanie-head!" Zane yelled.
"I'm not being a meanie-head! She won't get out of my room!"
Zane and Wolf heard Blake's shrill cry.
"I'm never having kids," Zane sighed as he got off of the couch and made his way upstairs.
Wolf smiled and followed his friend up the stairs. They walked to Lex's room where Deena stood with her arms folded over her chest, pouting and glaring at her brother.
"Tell her to get out," Lex said from his desk. "I tried pushing her out but she bit me."
"Deena! You're not supposed to bite," Zane said. "Mum said if you bit anyone again, you would have all your toys taken away."
"Lex was being mean!" she complained.
"Both of you are in trouble," Zane said. "Now just shut your mouths while I go check on Blake."
"I got him, mate," Wolf said from behind him, holding a quiet Blake in his arms. "Blakey loves his Uncy Wolfie, doesn't he?"
Blake reached up, grabbed a fistful of Wolf's hair and started sucking on it.
"What did I tell you about the baby-talk, Wolf?" Zane asked.
"Girls dig it," he replied with a shrug. "Don't they, Blakey?"
The baby only giggled as he pulled harder on Wolf's hair.
Zane ignored them both and turned to his other siblings. "Deena, please go back to your room. Leave Lex alone. Pick up your toys and get ready for bed. If Mum and Dad come home and you're still up, then you'll get into trouble."
Deena pouted and stomped off to her room, pushing past her older brother with a sniff. Lex scowled at them all in his adolescent way and stuck his headphones back in, ignoring them promptly.
Another typical night babysitting…
Zane swatted at the hand touching his face as he slept. When he slowly opened one eye and saw Hermione standing over him he grabbed at her wrist instead of slapping it again. "Sorry, Mum."
"It's okay," she laughed and sat next to him on the couch where he had been sleeping. Wolf was on the floor sprawled across some couch cushions, snoring loudly. "How were your brothers and sister tonight?"
"The same as usual," he replied with a small smile.
"That bad?" she said and brushed his hair out of his eyes. He stopped himself from moving away from her extremely maternal treatment. She couldn't seem to understand that he was getting a bit too old for her comforts. But he secretly savored every moment.
"Hopefully, they didn't break anything this time," Draco said, walking into the living room and removing his cloak.
"Nope," Zane said. "They might have burst my eardrums, but other than that, everything is in one piece."
"Thank you, sweetheart," Hermione said with a smile, "for watching them for us. Now, it's only ten o' clock on a Friday night. Why don't you and Wolf go out and get some air. I'm sure watching your siblings is not how you dream of spending your weekends."
"If Wolf wakes up, then we might go grab a late dinner," he replied.
"I'm awake," Wolf murmured from the floor, his face buried in a couch cushion.
"Then you better get up and go," Hermione said. "Don't stay out too late."
The two of them left after grabbing their wands and their wallets. It was a surprisingly cool night for July, and they walked quickly towards the busier part of Portsmouth which was only a few blocks away from the neighborhood.
"You know, I forgot to tell you that that girl lives around here," Wolf said, sticking his hands into his pockets and kicking at a pebble as they walked.
"The one who works in Diagon Alley," he replied, "at the apothecary shop."
"Isn't she the girl who is always drugged up?" Zane asked.
Wolf shoved his friend. "She's never drugged up. She's just a free-spirit!"
"She told you that your eyes are two moons waiting to be eclipsed."
He groaned in response. "She might be a tad odd, but she's a real looker, isn't she? Her hair reaches to at least her butt… and that butt! I swear it was made for pinching."
"Stop it!" Zane said, shoving Wolf this time. "You disgust me. You have the personality of an old lecher preying on younger women."
"Hey! She's our age. I asked her."
"How many times have you spoken to her?"
"I don't know, maybe three or four times. Why else would I go into an apothecary? I don't need incense or healing stones or magical herbs from God-knows-where. She's pretty much the love of my life, Zane. I just don't get why she doesn't react to my advances."
"Because her head is up her pinchable ass," Zane said quietly.
"What was that?"
"Oh, nothing… maybe she doesn't like you, mate. Ever thought of that?"
"Um. No. All girls like me," Wolf said with a roll of his eyes. "Duh."
"Well, maybe this bird is smarter than all the rest. Maybe all those drugs she does give her extra brain cells."
"Oh, my God, Zane, she doesn't do drugs!" Wolf laughed, punching Zane across the arm. "She might be the next Mrs. Wolf Lupin, so watch what you say about her."
"You're the only male I've ever known to fall in love with every girl he meets. You're insane."
"I'm insanely in love," Wolf said with an exaggerated sigh.
This time, Zane punched him and then started to run when Wolf vowed vengeance. They reached the Peach Pub and Eatery out of breath and laughing like a bunch of rowdy boys. Each of them ordered a sandwich and a tankard of ale.
As they sat eating their sandwiches, Wolf brought up the subject of girls again, a topic Zane usually tended to stray away from.
"So, do you think Melissa will go out with me if I ask her?" he asked.
"Who on earth is Melissa?" Zane said, taking a sip of ale and brushing crumbs off of his shirt.
"She's the girl from the apothecary shop! How many times must I repeat myself?" Wolf said.
"I thought her name was Moon Flower," Zane said.
"No, that's what I called her until I could figure out her real name. Do you ever pay attention to me when I talk?"
Zane smiled and took another sip of his drink.
"You know, one day I'm going to make your life miserable when you finally find the bollocks to speak to a girl."
"I speak to girls," Zane said defensively.
"No, you mumble at girls. There's a difference, mate. You're absolutely terrified of them."
"I am not!"
Wolf raised an eyebrow. "You have never gone up to a girl you thought was cute and started talking to her. Why not? What's there to lose?"
"I just don't like doing that," Zane finally said.
"How are you ever going to meet a nice girl if you expect them all to make the first move?"
"Seeing as how you've only had one girlfriend in your entire life, I wouldn't finish that sentence. Listen, Zane, you're my best friend, and I don't mean to insult you or anything. I just want you to branch out a bit, meet new people, find a girlfriend, etc."
Zane shrugged and looked into the tankard in his hand, swirling the last bit of golden drink around. "Alright, whatever."
Wolf finished his drink and then stood up. "Come on, let's go down to the bridge on Canvas Street and hang around. You can tell me about how excited you are to be starting at the Daily Prophet as a junior correspondent."
"And you can tell me how much you hate working for my dad," Zane said with a laugh. "I'm not sure if you've realized this or not, but he's a bit of a perfectionist when it comes to his magitecture."
"You're telling me? I thought I would be ignored because I'm just a lowly intern, but he actually stands over my shoulder and watches me work! I thought Uncle Draco was strict before. It's nothing compared to his work ethic."
Zane laughed again and they talked about their new jobs until they reached the scenic Canvas Street Bridge, their favorite place in all of Portsmouth. The subject of girls wouldn't be mentioned again. Well, for the rest of the night, that is. Wolf had a tendency of always getting his way. An annoying tendency… at least to Zane it was.